Things nobody tells you!

[MrsLianeB]

I have struggled to dtd with oh not because I don't want to it appears my vagina is so swollen it hurts far too much!
I'm sure if they told people this happens during pregnancy there wouldn't be as many 'unwanted pregnancies' as what this country has as noone wants a swollen foof!

Vulval varicose veins.

That's right, I said VULVAL varicose veins.

The hair is beyond a joke df says i need a shave i do my hairyness goes once dc arrives tho thank god.

Nose bleeds turned up this time around, my nose always feels stuffed up and bleeds yuk now that one i had no clue about!

Also the yoni pain/swelling is a new one this time around. i'm sure it's swollen to twice it's size not much sex here it hurts too much. plus between the swelling and the hair spreading everywhere i just cba to groom - it takes far too long now and i like it a bit less jungley than it is now - i'm going to ask df to help me soon

Keratosis pilaris. All. Over. My. Back.

Bloating up like a balloon every time I look at a carb. That's fun.

Periodic bouts of extreme all over itchiness. Trying to discretely itch your suddenly enormous boobs in the office is so ladylike.

Ah itchy boobs that's another great part of pregnancy!! X

LifeofPee I just have them on my legs and am dreading them moving upwards. You have my sympathy. Both my mum and a friend had them and they went away after the birth. Hope they do for you too.

The swelling in your hands. I feel like this.

Waking up for the whole of the third trimester several times a night for a wee in a puddle of your own drool.

Lifeofpee what fresh hell is this? Vulval varicose veins? That's new to me. No doubt coming soon...

Boils. Urgh.

Sciatica
Constipation
Piles
Getting stuck in the bath
Sweating
Being in a bad mood for several hours a day
Crying for no reason at all

I'm 38+6. I better give birth soon

Relief!!!!
I thought dribbling was just me... Is it common?
Mood swings too. I have had a few 'who have I become' moments.

Oh the dribbling. I had to bin a pillow after I had DD. gross. And no better this time.

I'm only 22+5 and am now terrified of going any further !

So far I've had
Morning sickness
Nosebleeds
Dizzy spells
Hair where there was no hair before - chest
Sore and very itchy boobs
Leaky nipples

Does this mean there is more to come?!?! I thought I was doing ok but I don't think I want any more!!!

Help!

Not seen my lady garden for months! Assume its still there... And I'm only 25 wks..

Weird blotches on my face

Nose bleeds

Struggling to put trousers/socks on etc

Crying at adverts (which aren't even sad....)

Crying at anything with a baby in

Crying in the mamas and papas shop
At anything baby/mother related and having to leave!

(You get the idea...)

On a slightly different note:

Strangers feeling the need to run your belly

Looking even more unattractive whilst dancing

Finding yourself going 'eeeeoooogh' when you bend down or get up

Not being able to eat any of my favourite foods...

Not being able to sleep without a massive long weird pillow

With two pregnancies behind me, the one thing that is really strange and no one told me about is a bloody fluffy fringe that grows under your normal hairline. It's patchy and looks fooking awful!

I have given birth. Two months ago. To be fair they've gone down, they're less bulgy for sure but in no way have they "disappeared soon after birth".

The dribbling has crept up on me in recent weeks (I'm 39+5 now). It's so disgusting!

I'm hoping I'll finally be able to breathe properly once baby is here as I've had a bunged nose since conception :-/

And yes to no idea what my lady garden looks like. Hideous, I imagine!

Being constantly damp in the downstairs department.

OH going off sex as soon as bump is noticeable.

Not being able to eat dinner off your lap after a certain point because you simply can't lean forward enough!

Piles for no reason, which lead to any farts sounding like a proper raspberry due to flappy bits

hahaha brilliant thread!

i def sympathise with the wind, the inability to lean forward and total disinterest in sex.

i'm also not liking how nobody has ever mentioned how uncomfortable maternity jeans can be! over the bump are too big and under the bump tend to cut me in half and i'm only 20 weeks!

i thought the dribbling was just me, I had a nap on the sofa the other day at my mums house with her Chihuahua snuggled under my cheek. When we both woke up the poor dog was soaked. would have felt more guilty if it wasnt so funny

That there is no actual glow people only say that to make you feel better,
that you get very spotty.
That you may suffer very bad heartburn and get it at least 6 times a day :(
That you will be exhausted like 90% of the time.
You will get very mad and just feel like punching someone just cuz they looked at you.
Your bladder goes weak and to be careful coughing/sneezing etc (this happened the 1st time with me yesterday never had it in my 1st pregnancy)
I could go on and on and on lol

In fact, eating dinner generally is a nightmare as my bump means I'm so far from the table that I throw food down myself all the time. My DH thinks it's hilarious.

If you do DTD in late pregnancy, finding a suitable position is a challenge. It's a good job we've been together years as it has been the most hilarious sex EVER!

Another vote for skin tags here too. They've popped up in all sorts of places. :-/

And also another vote for lightning crotch...I think it's quite cruel to not mention such things to people who've never had a baby! They should be warned.

Also, HUGE brown nipples and mottled boobs. Not sure what's going on there.

The fact that you turn into a total nymph.. And it begins to annoy OH!!!

Not to mention te awful constipation / spots.. Im 16 weeks and cant remember the last time i had a normal 'nice' bowel movement!
TMI? I dont caarrre it angers me :p

Another vote for the werewolf syndrome

Also discovered that the tiny, barely noticeable birthmark under my boob is actually a third nipple, when it swelled and got darker with my 'regular' two. Someone please tell me I'm not the only one?!

That you bleed for weeks after having the baby.