Fantastic, fabulous 40+ Mums-to-be! Part 4

[rosiedays]

as i filled the last post on old thread it seemed only polite to start the new one. hope i've done it right

To those who have just found this thread, Welcome and congratulations on you BFP. please feel free to join this amazing supportive group of 40+ mums to be. A very nonjudgmental and friendly place to hang out and share your pregnancy.

Blundermum 40, DC2 due early May?
Lotsofcheese, 40/41, DC2 (girl) due May (DS 4y)
Onemoreforgoodmeasure, 40, DC1 due 06/06
cyclecamper, 42, DC1 due 14/06
Newchoos, 40, DC2, due early July
Blueeyes1970,42, DC1 due on 8th July
BadMissM, 45, DC2, due 22/7
Rosiedays, 43 DD3 due 23rd July(ish)
ScubaSarah, nrly 40, DC1?, due July 22-Aug 1
Iclaudius,45, due 29/07
LottieH, 44, DC5, due mid August
Sparklysapphire, 44, DC2, due 28/8
BuzzBee, 40, DC2, due Sept
Notsoold, 41,DC3 due end of October
Animol, 42, DC5 due 13th
November

It's very quiet on here. I have nothing to report, I don't think this baby is ready to come out yet, and therefore I don't anticipate the sweep this afternoon working. As far as I understand it catdoctor, a sweep separates the membranes and can stimulate the production of hormones (can't remember which) which can kick-start labour. It works about 50% of the time I think, but if your body's not ready, it won't make a difference. I haven't yet filled in my birth plan (going to do that now!) as I'm working on the basis of being induced and so I expect whatever I'd ideally like to be irrelevant anyway. My m/w says the pregnancy has been "obstetrically normal", so I may be able to go to the midwife led unit, which looks much nicer than the delivery suite - and they're very close anyway so a transfer would be easy if needed.

My MIL is coming on Saturday not Sunday as I expected, working on the basis of induction on Monday, which I'm a bit gutted about as I'd like to spend some one to one time with DD, and that won't be an option as MIL doesn't always see that I sometimes need that. DH is still being pretty distant, and not showing any affection which I'm finding really hard, but has been pretty good about taking DD out to do stuff, as he's off this week.

Apologies for the ramble. Hello to all, would love to see some other updates on here, I hope everyone is well.

Hello sparkly I hope your sweep goes/has gone well. My cousin had one last Christmas and it did get things started for her.

I wonder what "obstetrically normal" means I'm sure it's totally good, I'm just curious really.

I've got to 18 weeks now and still having quite a few really rough days and feeling incredibly tired the rest of the time (sorry to moan) I'm just going to have to accept it, now the bump is undeniable, and stop expecting to feel normally well and energetic. DP is about to have hip replacement surgery and I will just have to cut myself some slack.

On the nice side DP felt some wiggles for the first time this week.

I'm trying to research the evidence about ELCS vs VBAC in various scenarios as I have a few risk factors and need to get it clear in my head before I see the consultant.

Evening all; Sparkly your lead re inducing older preggos earlier was interesting, but I think an opinion as opposed to a study - interesting too that it was felt there would be no increase in numbers of sections. I'm v cross about it all - suspect I will end up coming forward for induction but really don't want to aarrggh.
Sorry to hear you feel unsupported by DH - I havn't caught up with your story. I feel much more vulnerable I suppose than usual. I have made an internet diagnosis of Asperger's in my DH, and he causes me extreme distress at times.
Isabella I could do with a daily kip now - but work/toddler generally puts a stop to that! No need to apologise for moaning! I think that must be a very hard call ELCS vs VBAC - I guess an ELCS would be a better experience for all than an EMCS. I suppose I'm more of a 'it ain't broke, why fix it' kind of person, ie pro 'natural' but risk factors are risky!!

Just wanted to say hello. I'm 40 and 16 weeks with DC3. My GP said not to worry about extra risks due to age apart from increased Downs risk. My NT results came back as 1:10,000 which I found amazing as much lower risk than my other two. I do have to see the consultant though - apparently for my age and because of previous treatment on my cervix ( LEEP). Has anyone else had this and if so what difference has it made to your care?

Isabeller, sorry you're still feeling rough, tiredness is completely to be expected. I think you're right about adjusting your expectations, I was lucky and felt ok until the last 3 or 4 weeks, but have realised in the last fortnight that I just have to go with being more tired than usual.

It must be tricky to make a decision about ELCS vs VBAC, a friend of mine had to do this a while back - all the evidence suggested she'd be better having an ELCS but the medical team wanted her to make the decision which she found really hard, because they wouldn't recommend either way. She had the ELCS in the end.

I think obstetrically normal just means I've had a total normal pregnancy, so if the induction works quickly, my m/w says there's no reason I can't use the m/w led unit in hospital. I'm pretty sure the sweep hasn't worked, no bleeding, no cramping, no sign of anything. It was much less uncomfortable, and quicker than I expected though.

Catdoctor, I have seen a graph somewhere showing an slightly increased stillbirth rate in over 40s, but I'm not sure where. I don't want to be induced again either, which is why I asked them to put it off til next week, when I think they'd have rather done it this week. Also it means I'll have a September baby which should be better school wise though means an extra year of childcare fees. Anyway after the RCOG came up with that press release about how pregnant women should avoid things like shower gel & tinned food to be on the safe side, I'm not entirely convinced by them.

As for my DH, he doesn't want to have another baby, he wanted me to terminate, even though we'd been trying for 10 months. He thought I wouldn't get pregnant - so did I to be honest. It's been really hard, he was like this last time, and I very much hope he'll be ok when LO is here, as I'm very concerned that this time our marriage won't recover, although he has said he won't leave. I'm sorry your DH upsets you so much sometimes, but hope he's supporting you better than mine at the moment.

Hi poppy, I saw a consultant at about the midway point, purely because of my age (45) but he was happy everything was normal, and said he'd see me at 38 weeks to "make plans". I in fact saw a doctor and induction is booked for Monday at 40 + 6, but otherwise it's all been midwife care. I haven't had any cervical problems so I don't know how much difference that would make.

Hello everyone, nice to see so much life here!

sparkly sorry your sweep doesn't seem to have worked. And sorry you're not going to get the one-to-one time you wanted with DD.

isabeller I hear you about the tiredness! Mine's not every day any more, but it's completely unpredictable, and when it hits it really hits.

catdoctor I don't know how you and sparkly manage with anything other than completely supportive OHs - but as sparkly says, I really hope yours is doing a better job than hers is at the moment. Mine was pretty crap last year when I was pg (ended in MC), despite having agreed to TTC - I got my BFP the first month and I think it was too soon for him. Was quite worried about what would happen this time but he's been great.

Hello poppy! I can't answer your question as I'm in Belgium, where you see your gynae all through pregnancy (no midwife care).

I'm 17 weeks tomorrow and suddenly I've grown a noticeable bump. Trousers I was wearing last week are now too tight. By the time I got back from work today MIL had delivered a pair of maternity jeans she'd been turning up for me - I bought them on Monday because I had time, thinking I wouldn't need them for a few weeks, but I was so glad to put them on this evening! Saw my gynae earlier this week and everything was fine. I got my date for my scan, but as here it's the '2nd trimester scan' rather than '20 weeks', it's not till 8th October, which seems ages off.

Hi all I'm new to here. I was told back on march after trying for 3yrs that I was unable to have my own child unless I used an egg donor. We went on list then hubby changed his mind & asked for us to be removed. After a trip to GP's Friday to discuss painful breasts & abdominal pain (which I was praying wouldn't be the big C - father died from bowel cancer) she asked if I could be pg. said no as told march impossible. She insisted I do urine test to rule out prior to her doing other tests so in agony my shock / surprise / disbelief when she said "congrats you're 14wks pg!". It's my 1st baby & just hoping all goes well as this prob my one & only chance. It all hasn't sunk in yet x

In my shock I forgot to mention I'm 45 x

Thanks ladies and congratulations Angel!

Good gracious angel and congratulations!

Angel - just out of interest wondering how your gp knew you were 14 wks in the gp surgery? I love medical knowledge so hoping to add to it!

Hi. Wanted to join this thread but first say a big congrats to angel. I'm 30 wks pg at 43 will be 44 when Dd born. Bonkers.

Falling asleep but wanted to get myself on here and shall read everyone's posts in the am.

Wow, angel, what a way to skip the stress of the first semester - congratulations And congratulations to you too william

seconded! what a lovely surprise :) best of luck to you both

DD2 was born in the early hours of Tuesday mornimg,after quick labour following hours of waiting after induction. We're all fine,DD1 thrilled 2 have litlle sister, DH seems to be doing ok.I'll.uodate further when I can.

Yeah sparkly. Well done you. Xx enjoy your yummy baby snuggles. Plumping a cushion and ordering your favourite drink in the grads snug .x

Congratulations sparkly

Congratulations sparkly!

Thanks everyone & congrats Sparkly! x

She knew usual way I suppose (forgive me but I'm totally new to all this!!!) by last date of period & then her spinning date circle card thingy x but will obviously know more once 1st scan done x

Congratulations sparky.

Angel- sorry, I sounded really intrusive there and I made a massive assumption that you mustn't have known when your LMP was / irregular ( hence finding out so far on) good job I'm not a real doctor ( only in my head!!!). Anyway it must be really good to miss the first trimester constant worry. I know the worry never goes away but the first trimester is the worst.

In relation to my earlier post I've seen the consultant today and he's not worried about my cervix. Good news.

Oh and consultant said they might induce me at 39 weeks as they don't like over 40s to go over edd. Anyone else been told this?

Hi all

Its been months since I posted but here I am, 40+4 and feeling pretty fed up. (This is baby number 5, boy number 5) - surprise pregnancy we only found out at 22 weeks. I'm 46 and due to my age I was told I would be induced at term (Monday 2 Sept), managed to avoid that as the only reason was my age. Settled for today but then when I saw my midwife yesterday she said as the head was still high, and all well otherwise, I could perhaps rebook for induction on Monday. Fingers crossed this little one arrives at the weekend. My last 2 boys both turned up 2 days after their due date, I had an induction with my first son and 19 years on it still haunts me. Very keen to avoid if at all possible. Its been lovely reading the posts and catching up - we are all fantastic proof that baby making isn't over once you hit 35.

poppy I wasn't told about induction but I was told about all the risks in labour including having a longer labour, bleeding out etc.

Delightful! I feel they brought me in specifically to scare me, the fuckers! I am almost 44 btw and baby conceived by surprise and naturally.

No problems with my first birth at 37 but this one --- well I now have the fear!

Good luck 4boys.
William - seems that all the advice is different. I've
Had two normal pregnancies and deliveries and all planned natural conceptions ( in first month of trying). And I've been told by one mw that if I was one year younger -39 the consultant wouldn't have even seen me. Happy to take advice though. They do, on the whole, know best.