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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

When to tell people after the birth

11 replies

photobucket · 08/04/2013 11:37

DH and I had a discussion argument about this.

Assuming all goes well, I want to text close friends fairly soon after the birth (so within a few hours), and then send out an email to everyone within a couple of days. DH wants to wait until we're home with the baby and can get some nice pictures to share, even if this takes a few days.

I'm shocked at this: I can't imagine not telling my closest friends that I'd had my baby for that long. I'm also a bit upset: is he just not that excited about it?

Any views? Am I just being hormonal (highly likely..)? When will you tell people (parents/siblings excepted)?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

SheepNoisesOff · 08/04/2013 11:39

You're the one giving birth, you can do what you like!

Your DH is being silly IMO. It's not about waiting for a good photo opportunity. All babies look pretty much the same anyway

Sleepyfergus · 08/04/2013 11:48

With Dd2 I was texting within a couple of hours after the birth. Hopelessly excited to tell friends etc! Esp as i went 5 days over.

Each to their own but I think it's quite hard to wait a few days to do it. Your DH may change his mind though once the baby arrives, he may end up desperate to let everyone know too!

Congratulations btw!

Saundy · 08/04/2013 12:02

I don't think you're being hormonal! I'll be telling my family when i go into labour & friends as soon as I feel up to it afterwards.

I would just say you tell your friends & family on your schedule & I'll tell mine on my schedule - but I'm clearly more bossy than you!

Congratulations & good luck in finding a compromise!

Twinklestarstwinklestars · 08/04/2013 12:03

We are having dc3 in July but I've said I won't be telling anyone until I've spoken to ds1 and ds2, then will ring my dad and brother and dp can ring sister and brother and aunt then will just put it on Facebook but I haven't even put that we're having a baby on there officially, its not a secret but can't see the point of constant updates etc in there.

FortyFacedFuckers · 08/04/2013 12:08

I phoned my parents within an hour of giving birth, as it was Christmas all my close family were there so they all found out and I text friends etc 6 hours later on the way home from the hospital. I wanted everybody to know ASAP

Sleepyfergus · 08/04/2013 12:26

Just wanted to add that of course I wouldn't update friends etc until all immediate family were informed. That might be a bit much!

nextphase · 08/04/2013 12:37

Hmm, well we phoned both sets of parents (grandparents) fairly soon after DS1, and sent an e-mail after a day or 2.

DS2 was an unplanned home birth, and a friend happened to ring when he was about 30 mins old - I chatted to her for a few mins, and then she asked if DH was OK - why had he answered the phone?. I had to admit to having 2 paramedics, my Mother, the Midwife all in my bedroom, along with not very old baby. She obviously got on the phone to all our mates, as I was getting calls all day, so an e-mail with pic went out when he was about 5 hrs old.....

JollyPurpleGiant · 08/04/2013 12:40

I think DH phoned my mum when I was getting stitched up, lol. It certainly wasn't very long anyway. I emailed out/put it on facebook a few hours later.

You need to come to a compromise though.

elliejjtiny · 08/04/2013 12:59

I'm wondering about this myself. Feels right to tell the DS's first. I really want to do the "announcement" on facebook with photo after telling parents and siblings but will have to do it fairly close together as last time other people posted it on facebook before I had the chance and were posting updates on the progress of my labour as well even though they didn't know anything about my labour.

Definately not telling anyone apart from people looking after DS's when I'm in labour, but not sure about the birth. DC4 has been diagnosed with a cleft lip and possibly other health issues so I'm especially sensitive about stuff like this.

OP I'm all for mums and dads being equal but in this case I think when you've either pushed a baby out of your fanjo or had your tummy sliced open then you get to decide how you announce the news. If your DH ever needs surgery to his genitals I'm sure you will be gracious and let him choose how to announce the news

worsestershiresauce · 08/04/2013 12:59

I gave birth at 3am, and DH had phoned family by 6am. I waited until a slightly more civilised 9am to tell friends. Why wait? Anyone who cares will be more interested in the news than waiting for a photo. Tell him he is being precious, and as you will be the one doing the hard work you call the shots on this one.

rrreow · 08/04/2013 13:05

I phoned my closest relative within an hour after the birth. DH phoned his closest relatives at a similar time. I probably texted my best friends a few hours afterwards. I don't remember if we put it on Facebook the same day.. We sent an email to everyone with pictures either the day or 2 days after the birth.

I couldn't imagine not telling ANYONE until several days after the birth. It's not about the pictures or the announcement being 'perfect', it's about sharing your wonderful news with your family and friends.

Could he be worried that people will be wanting to visit straightaway? Most people tend to be reasonable anyway, but you can always say something in the announcement like "We'd love to receive visitors once we've got back on our feet and DC is 1/2/? days/weeks old. Please give us a call to arrange a time."

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