Pregnant (IVF) Worriers

[Dildals]

Hi everyone,

This thread is for all you incessant worriers out there, not necessarily limited to IVF-ers, although I get the feeling the people who have had trouble TTC are more prone to worrying than others!

A few of us graduated from the IVF thread (link below) and are having a go at our own thread to get out of the other IVF-ers hair! So get your roomy jogging bottoms on for some virtual hand holding, mutual symptom spotting and staying sane until the next scan date.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1691674-Excellent-Egg-Buddies-continued-Anyone-having-IVF-ICSI-in-Jan-Feb-and-March-2013-please-join-us

Buzzy, so sorry you're having a bad day. Sod the immune woman - her opinion means nothing to you.

buzzy why was the immune specialist giving you issues about using donor eggs?
I had spotting during first trimester (and a loyalty card with the EPU), what reassured me (apart from being scanned) was that I had read that with IVF the drugs make sure to plump up your endometrium to form a nice cushy bed for the babies. As a result the endometrium is flush with blood and you are more likely to spot, which doesn't necessarily mean anything bad.

Oh buzzy I'm sorry you are having a bad day. I don't understand the immune connection but they shouldn't have an opinion about DE. That is your choice and you now have a lovely bean on board who is going to bed in and get cosy in the nice plump surroundings that dildals describes. Good luck at EPU. They are there to help you. Xx

Hi Guys! thanks shaz and expat, I am doing fine!
Was having quite a wibble end of last week and a couple of the other threads I am on have lots of ladies on there some of which were unfortunately having loses.

I banned myself from here for a while whilst I got it together, as I would manage to reassure myself that everything was probably ok, then read about someone else with similar symptoms have a mc and it was sending me a bit mad I think.
Made me feel like a bit of an unsympathetic bitch, but it did me some good. had another scan on monday at the epu and all is good, little bean 7+2 and twice the size as the week before, just as it should be apparently.

You guys have been busy, not been able to read a weeks worth of posts, but hope you are all doing ok and welcome to buzzy good luck today
With you shazza on lack of time or energy for creativity at the moment, I keep daydreaming about me next year, paintbush on one hand, baby breastfeeding in the other (surrounded by nappies, laundry, washing up and chaos that is not sorted because i am painting goddamit!)
crisps think i am going to give everything on offer a go if I can, my local drs has a pregnancy physio group too so hopefully will meet a wide variety of people if i turn up to everything I can.

Hi foody sorry you had a wobble but am very happy your bean is ok. I understand about other people's news. I found that hard too and imagined all sorts of things happening. You are not heartless or selfish but need to do whatever it takes to get through this worrying time. When I was starting treatment I read some top tips and one of them was that the successes or failures of others were not your successes or failures and had no bearing on your outcome. Hard to hang on to sometimes but true.

Anyway good to have you here and glad you are ok.

Xx

Good to hear from you Foody. I was starting to feel a bit clucky.

Buzzy, I hope all went well with you today.

oops, entered too soon. Mrs H hope your scan went well. Someone else was having a scan today I think?

It's really easy to have a wobble when you read other threads about things that have gone wrong. I'm getting more and more uptight the nearer I get to the time things went wrong and am avoiding bad news at the moment. My imagination is going nuts without reading about other things that can happen

My massage was lovely. So lovely I drooled everywhere . My face looked really different afterwards, especially my eyes - shows how much tension we carry in our face.

Sorry you're feeling rotten buzzy, hope it passes soon.

Foody, hope you're a bit calmer too.

Expat, snorted at you drooling! That's the kind of thing I would do.

Shazza and Foody, I could have done some painting this afternoon! I have discovered the magic of the sling - I have to recommend this to you all. I went to a sling library and had a consultation as to what style was best for me, hired one for £8 a month (!) and tried it out today. The baby slept in it for an hour this morning while I did housework and got DD1 ready, she had another hour sleeping in it this afternoon while I cooked. I wish I'd had one for DD1.

Found this about birth being a spectator sport, the stuff of nightmares I think! kind of amusing in places (just)
www.today.com/moms/delivery-room-drama-has-birth-become-spectator-sport-1C9979714

mariana I am sold with the idea of a sling library, I had read about cloth nappy librarys, but not ones for slings, what a fab idea! my sister had a night mare choosing one for her first and as a consequence has a different one for her second.

expat blame the drooling on pg hormones (though it did make me chuckle a bit) I have been doing more of it in my sleep lately .
How have you guys got on with dental care whilst pg? had a wisdom tooth break and it had to be pulled out last week (not much fun and expensive as NHS could not fit me in for a week!) sure it cant be pg related yet, but apart from good hygiene and checkups is there anything else i can be doing? my nashers are not in a great state to start with

It's your gums that might need attention in pregnancy, some people more than others. I used to see the hygienist 3 monthly, although when I changed dentists recently the new hygienist said 6 monthly was ok if you had been seeing a hygienist regularly, she implied I'd been over treated. Bleeding gums is a clue you might have problems. Costs a lot if you can't get an NHS dentist (which I can't - not even in the sticks!)

Have a good Friday everyone!

Morning girls

Mariana I'm obsessed with looking at slings. I can't decide which one to get. Which one have you tried? I've got it in my head that using one is going to be my saving grace. There must be a sling library in London? I'm glad little trenchlet is enjoying it.

Foody I haven't done anything about a dentist yet. I've been flossing and brushing as usual. Blimey I got such a fright the other night whilst flossing and my gum bled. I hate the dentist but guess I should go. Im always too scared of the cost. Sorry about the tooth.

Expat massage sounds great. I'm intrigued about how your face was different. I'd like to try that. There is loads of tension in my face at the mo.

I hope the scan was ok yesterday MrsH. I think that keep and maybe someone else has the 12weeker coming up?

I'm still quite low unfortunately. Very teary these last couple of days. Bloody hormones. Looking forward to the weekend.

Have a good day everyone.

Shaz xx

Oh and re cloth nappies anyone had any thoughts? That is my next google search!

Shazza I have a look at cloth nappies and my god are there a lot out there. I did find one site that sold organic, non bleached and they looked pretty good, but I think a nappy library if the way to go. Also get on your local council website as most offer a free trial pack (just one of everything I think) or money back when you but some, need to have your MATb form to get it. I stumbled accross this when I was looking at bin collection.
You got anything nice planned for the bank holiday weekend??
mariana thanks, gums are bleeding a little bit sometimes, so am off to get a good mouthwash today, something grim like corsodol i expect. my sisters gums bled throughout her pgs.
Oh and shazza my friend used cloth nappies a few years ago and they were always quite bulky meaning she had to get bigger clothes, but think they make better shaped designs now! hugs for tearyness and , I have been eating rather alot of these lately.

There's a nappy library too? Sometimes I really miss the UK.
I will go with cloth too. Apparently they are not so good when babies are tiny because it all oozes out the sides and have been warned to take a few small disposables for early days. Anyone know if that's true?

my sisters 8 week old is in disposable nappies and it (TMI runny poo) is not always contained in that either! amazing how much they produce at once! I think the outer covers have quite good elasticated bit round the legs so maybe they are ok, probably just depends on quantity and consistency, lovely! Oh and just to share...... my sister has had to combination feed with both of them (simply does not produce enough despite all the support techniques and cluster expressing) and she really noticed a difference when she changed formula, SMA = constipation, Aptamil = definitely not! she might try cow and gate and see if its somewhere in the middle!

It's really amazing how much poo they produce from their tiny bodies. My friend's baby didn't poop for 5 days and we were all bracing ourselves for the poosnami.

he he! my sister got showered literally mid nappy change a couple of weeks ago, and she was wearing white! thankfully it was at home but i think she carries a spare top for her too now not just the little one.

Hi all, may I join you?
I am 5 + 2 weeks pg after IVF. So excited and slightly shocked that it worked.
No real symptoms yet other than bad bloating - but not complaining as I'd much rather be pg than not! I have my first scan booked for 18 June - feels ages away! Not sure I can really wait that long!!
Alex

Shazza There's a sling library in SE27 which I think might be Forest Hill. It's on the net. South London Sling Library. I love the idea of going to someone house and just natter about babies all afternoon and trying out different slings. There are twin slings but they get mixed reviews, some say that the twins get too heavy too quickly for any mum without Arnold Schwarzenegger type build. Others say that the babies get too big too quickly. I think one single sling might be nice anyway so DH can carry one if he wants to, he's quite in to a sling. We'll get him a nice colourful one! ;-)

Sorry to hear you are tearful, just try and be gentle on yourself. Is there any scope you can look for a better job after you return from maternity leave? Having babies comes with a lot of worries, not just about whether they are healthy but also financial and it does make you think about the future and how you want to shape your life. This is a big life event, it is totally normal to feel emotional about it.

I am steering well clear of cloth nappies. With twins I am not going to run a 24hr laundromat!

We had our 20 week scan today. So fascinating! Chaos and Ruckus are both thriving. They are already annoying the shit out of eachother, kicking eachother. Both are head down, which means I may actually have to prepare for a vaginal birth. Eek. Although of course they have lots of time to somersault in to breech. They have the cutest upper lips and little feet. It seems they have inherited my feet rather than DH's. His feet are a bit special ... I reckon he can support himself hanging off a branch with his toes.
It took another 90 mins or so and there were four people in the room. I love the attention you get with twins :-).
I didn't want to find out the sex, but DH did so we did. Sort of glad we did, because it was exactly opposite to what I thought it was and I must say I have a bit of trouble adapting ... I am sure I'll get used to it by week 37. (We have decided to not tell anyone, and I am practising keeping it a secret, something that I am not very good at) Next scan in four weeks. I need to get a King's loyalty card now, instead of the St Thomas EPU one!

Happy Friday all!
Gin how is the tiredness going? Have you got anything else to report on the symptoms front? They've just changed our NCT course dates which is a bit annoying, but the trainer is also studying to be a midwife so I'll let her off!
Sweetie good luck convincing your husband! Mine would love to stay at home. In terms of salary alone that would make sense for us, but then when you look at shares and stuff (he works for a bank) and future career prospects it's better that we keep him in work. That's what I'm telling him anyway.
Shazza I'm sorry to hear you're feeling so fed up at work. You work quite long hours don't you - you've posted before when travelling back quite late - and that's bound to take it out of you at the moment. Living in East Dulwich I often get to sit on a bus in Brixton so at least you're not alone there :)
Buzzy how are you doing? I also don't understand your immunologist's attitude. How was EPAU? Hope and trust all is well.
Expat you've made me want a face massage! In fact, any kind of massage! It has been too long...
Dildals Your scan sounds amazing! So lovely to hear both twins are doing well. And that they have cute lips and feet!! I also CAN'T BELIEVE you're not revealing the sex... you're killing me here! But completely understand the need to practice keeping it a secret! The fact you say 'complete opposite' makes me think that you're having two boys or two girls....mmmm...
Foody sorry to hear you're having wobbles but your scan must have been reassuring. I like your attitude to getting involved in whatever's on offer. That's a great way to meet people, and have fun- what could be better?
Mariana - a sling library - who knew?? My friend who recently had a baby has also been extolling the virtures of a sling, she said it has been incredibly calming for baby (which in turn has been calming for her!). I'm glad you're having the same experience.
Hello Alexeliza and welcome! Don't worry about a lack of symptoms - loads of us on here didn't get many or any. It is bloody surprising when it works isn't it! If it works for the first time you get a surprise, if it works later down the line (as in my case) that's also suprising! Forgive me for not bothering to do the maths but how pregnant will you be by your scan date then?

AFM 12+1 scan went well yesterday! Baby was quite wriggly and waved and kicked a few times for us. He/she is measuring well and has all external parts and internal organs accounted for. It took quite a while as for one part of the scan he/she wouldn't move his/her bum which meant that the sonographer couldn't get a proper look at the bottom of the spine, but eventually baby obliged! I also had to have another internal scan (EUGH!) as due to my retroverted uterus they couldn't get a clear view of the kidneys. I thought I'd seen the back of the dreaded dildo cam!! Blood also came back - very low risk of Down's syndrome so I'm happy about that.

We've now started to tell people - DH's parents got a call last night - I think they were a bit stunned into silence! I wonder that they'd just given up on the idea of us ever having a family. I also told my younger brother who I'm very close to - he got very excited, screamed like a girl and asked if he could be present at the birth! If I do have it at home - why not? He'd really cheer me up I think :)

x

Hi there MrsHY1, your 12 week scan sounds wonderful, can't wait until I'm there! Glad the bloods came back and the risk of Downs is low - hopefully it will be smooth sailing all the rest of the way now.
I love the idea of your brother being at the birth! My DH sounds like he would be petrified at the thought of being present - he's so squeamish about everything. At the egg transfer he looked like a cornered animal being in the same room so I asked the staff if he could leave - they were a bit surprised but understood - better not to be hindered by someone who was looking greener by the minute, lol!
My first scan is at 8+6 weeks, really wish the days would go faster. I go from being really excited and impatient to fretting that they'll find that there's nothing there and it's all a fraud - I was so nervous that I did another test yesterday just to double check that it still showed pg - which I was thankful it did!! Mad, I know!! But it helped to reassure .
Waiting, waiting, waiting......

Welcome and congratulations alexeliza !!!
hand holding for the waiting, its tough! I am 8 weeks-ish so not that far ahead of you!
MrsH so pleased you scan was A ok!! sounds amazing (apart from dildocam) and yay for the blood results too!
Didals sounds like an amazing scan too! wow you must be so pleased! and good luck with secret keeping and yay for the playfighting going on in there, must be a very good sign

I have been off work for the last couple of weeks with sciatica (as well as the wobbles) (had it for years) so went in to see my boss today and tell him about the pg too. not wanting everybody to know yet so have asked him to keep it confidential, but I need altered duties from now (am a nurse).
He accepted this well and we filled out the pg risk assessment and the form for occy health for my back.

my dr has agreed to do a 'fit' note saying I can return to work but with amended duties to cover me until I see occy health. Unfortunately this is going to piss one or 2 of my colleagues off, but I will just have to deal with this until I am ready to tell people about the pg too. Makes me feel like I should just tell them to make it easier, but I am not telling my folks until I see them in 4 weeks so really don't think other people should know.

oh fairy remember the discussion on due dates? I asked and for IVF they take EC date as date of conception. Guys took the wrong date ... seriously ... anyway. They took the 19th of Jan, at which I had a scan and bloods taken but definitely no eggs. I would have remembered. My EC date was 21st of January, on a Monday, it had snowed, same as yours (that's right isn't it?). So my EDD should the 14th of Oct as well. I will get it fixed next time, I don't want to be induced any earlier than necessary!

Dildals and MrsH scans both sound AMAZING.

Dildals can you tell us if the twins are both same sex at least?

Welcome alexaliza I am also just over 8 weeks so still at the sinking in/worry all is well stage.

Foody sorry you haven't been well, glad all went well with your boss. My manager knows because was very supportive through the treatment phase.

Shazza I am going to look into slings nearer the time. I have it in my head I will be able to sling one baby while I deal with the other baby and then swap them over. I am not sure if this would be practical but am willing to give it a go.