Transporting a new(ish) born to a wedding

[Teapig]

This probably isn't the right place to post, but wasn't quite sure where to post. I'm a first timer due in April and am wondering if it's at all possible to get to a wedding in June.

The wedding is in Manchester and we're just outside of London but don't drive. We'd love to go and see that side of the family but thinking it might not be possible DH is learning to drive but it seems unlikely he'd pass by then.

So, my question is has anyone done a journey like this before with a 2ish month baby? I'm thinking it's just not possible on public transport - nowhere to change baby apart from yuky toilets, too much stuff to stransport - we'd need to take car seat so we can be driven to and from wedding, moses basket for our hotel room, nappies, steriliser I guess. The list seems endless and impossible.

Thought I'd ask in case anyone has a solution I'm overlooking. Thanks!

Could you ask one of the family to pick you up - you do know they will all be bursting with excitement to see the new baby

Borrow as much as you can from family in Manchester and get the train, it's only 2 hours.

I haven't done a train journey at that age but have done flights so was also worried about things like changing baby in public toilets but DD tended to sleep all the way. How long would the journey be?

Whatever about getting there though I couldn't imagine going to a full wedding at that stage - I was so exhausted at that point!

not impossible-- anyone you know live in manchester? If so, could you stay with them esp. if they have all the baby gear?

What sort of buggy are you getting?- if it is one with a detachable cot attachment, I would just take that, and a travel sized nappy mat (the type that fit in your changing bag). The faff is going to be if you bottle feed, as the bottles, steriliser and formula will have to come with you- but not impossible! You can get travel sterilisers which are smaller, or do as our folks used to do, and fill a bucket with some milton and sterilise bottles overnight.

Would probably be easier if you could stay with someone though...

It can be done!

Ask hotel for a travel cot?

I always found travelling with a 0-3 month old quite easy, as they tend to just sleep all the way (or be on the boob). Can you put the car seat on your pram? We had adjusters that meant the carseat could be put on instead of the carrycot. That way you have baby transport sorted in one go. We coslept so any time we went away (only once though, iirc) he'd just be in the bed with us.

If you can make it work and feel up for it then I'd definitely say go. If however you find it too daunting and it would only make you feel stressed, then it might be better not to go.

I took DS to a wedding at 6 weeks Cheshire to Newcastle no problems he was good as gold harder work now!
Trains are good London to Manc book seats and take hand wash and baby will probably sleep all the way or be fed
It would be better in a car if you can more comfortable but at least on a train you can feed DC whilst moving
Good luck x x

You can do it. Travel light. Baby can sleep in pram or hotel will have cots. (I am being a hypocrite here because I always lugged a travel cot for pfb but soon wised up. I still take my own bedding).

You can change baby in the pram or on your lap if toilets are skanky. You'll need to travel when it is quiet to do this though.

Don't take loads of spare nappies/muslins/clothes/creams/bath stuff whatever and buy what you need if something unexpected happened. I would take cartons of fomula and disposable bottles if I were ff.

It is scary but organisation is your friend. Carry cot not necessary, hotel can provide travel cot... Or if you are like me co-sleep with DH on the floor/spare bed :)

Pack as light as you can. Can't remember what buggy you were having, but if it's one with a lie flat pram bit, that'll be handy.

Do any of the family have a suitable car seat that can be used for car trips? If you get a taxi, it's not necessary to have a car seat to travel about.

Family will love the baby coming and will make a big effort to help you. You may even find a willing relative to collect/return you, any responsible older teens/students willing to do it for a little cash and fuel costs?

Don't feel afraid of sticking to your routine as usual. Relatives do like to think they know best

What they say, easy I should think!

I know I went to a wedding in London when I was three weeks old (we lived in Leeds). Not sure how we got there but could well have been by train. I know my granny went with them as well. I think it was all quite straight forward and I mostly slept.

The amount of stuff you need is huge, unless you have family with similar aged child you can stay with. But you're not going alone and your DH could pull 2 big suitcases if need be. I wouldn't worry about the public transport, just practice changing on your knee/ in the buggy before you go.

What would bother me more, having had a difficult dc1, is whether you'll be up to it. Depends a bit on when your dc is born. If he/she is 2 weeks late (average gestation for first timers is 41+3) then you may be dealing with an 8-10 week old, which is v different from a 14-16 week old. At 8 weeks DS hadn't slept for more than 45 mins day or night since birth, wouldn't nap anywhere other than on me, fed almost constantly and screamed whenever he wasn't held/fed. Also screamed in a car seat for the WHOLE journey.

Now DS was a difficult baby and you may get an easy one. What I'm saying is that it will be very difficult to predict whether you feel up to it, until much closer to the time. You may have to ask to be a definite maybe. I know there is no way I'd have coped with a wedding 8weeks after DS born, I know other mums who wouldn't have blinked an eye.

Good luck, try to keep your options open!

Travelling with the baby on the train will be fine. As people have said, the baby will hopefully be lulled to sleep in carseat or your arms for the journey. Hotels have cots, changing is very compact at this age; you could do it on your lap probably (if the toilets are that bad)

The hard part is feeling up to going to a wedding when you are 8 weeks post-partum. It's probably the peak of tiredness (or was for me) 8 weeks of feeding max every 3 hrs through the day and night, I felt very haggard and was extremely unattractive at that point! I wasn't comfortable enough with BF to not feel anxious about where/when I'd be able to do it, I hadn't worked out what to wear to feed discretely especially not to a wedding.

My first thought was that even if DH passes his driving test, would you all be confident driving such a distance with a new driver and a newborn? am sure DH would be careful but it is a LOT of pressure to put on him.

This journey could be the making of you as a PFB first timer see i was overcautious with everything and packed our car to the rafters, however my friend took her PFB to Canada when he was 3 months old! I was

She breastfed so it was easier not to carry all the baggage. As a hardened formula feeder my advice would be to take the pre=prepared milk cartons, get some more in boots/sainsbos/tesco etc when you get to Manchester.

you can buy small travel sterilisers for the bottles but you would need access to a microwave, so give the hotel a call and ask if they can let you use the kitchen to (a) wash the bottles and (b) use the microwave steriliser. You can then make up the bottles using the hotel room kettle.

if you are buying a travel system (y'know - the pram, car seat and buggy attachment) then i would just take the car seat attached to the chassis, that is your car seat issue sorted and as another poster said ^ just co-sleep with DC. Or ask the hotel for a travel cot.

Stuff like nappies can be bought in Manchester, just take a small pack for the journey, check out where you are staying and make sure it is near a supermarket or boots for the formula cartons and nappies. If you are staying with family then why not ask them to buy some in for you and you can pay them back?

It is all possible, and i wish you luck! I live in South Manchester/Cheshire so PM me if you want to give me specifics and i can point you in the right direction hotel/supermarket/access wise

good luck

Just to add that by 5 months old DS had flown to Australia and back, without any bother. But those early dark weeks are hard.

I went to a wedding when DS was 10 weeks old and i felt fine, it all depends upon how you feel yourself. I found a dress that was slightly big for me pre pregnancy but was dark enough to hide my bumps!

With 2 of you it's very very doable- I have 3 dc and didn't blink at having to do just this when dc3 was 3 weeks old. We were lucky to have a good travel system (Bugaboo & Maxi Cosi car seat) and be co sleeping anyway. You won't need half the stuff you think you do. I might even have the dress I wore if you'd like me to look, I'd be more than happy to post it to you as it's no good to me anymore (Jojo Maman Bebe black wrap dress that you can bf in). Buy a pack of nappies when you get there to save carting them, take a few babygros and a beautiful blanket to wrap the baby in- relatives were falling over themselves with delight to see little ds in a simple babygrow and white crochet blanket. Keep it as simple as you can. It seems overwhelming now but trust me, by 2 months old this stuff might not phase you at all. I go on the train all the time with my 3, for 5+ hour journeys, with noone to help. You'll cope :)

Yes, I did this - London to Cumbria with a 9 week old, by train. Don't bother with the Moses basket - you can co-sleep (or borrow a hotel travel cot - but I found that they don't really 'sleep' as such at that age )

Do you need the car seat? Will you really need a lift or is the venue walkable / bus-able? I'd take the sling, no pram, no car seat, no basket - just your wedding clothes in suit bags and an overnight bag with baby things and toiletries. As someone else said, changing is very compact at that age - tiny little bottoms!

If you can afford to go first class you'll probably get an empty carriage with lots of spare tables for changing.

Thanks for the advice! I'm starting to feel like it might be doable.

Trains from London to Manchester only take two hours but we're about an hour's train journey outside of London and probably about 30-40 mins to get across London to Euston - feels a bit of an epic journey but now I'm hopeful it might be possible.

Dothraki, we did think about asking family to give us a lift but it's too big an ask. They're all in Manchester and it's a four hour drive to where we live and they'd have to bring us back so 4 x 4hour trips for them.

galwaygirl, good point about how tiring the wedding might be. Fortunately the wedding reception is at a hotel that we could stay in so baby and I could make off to our room at any point.

PPT our pram has a detachable travel cot which would save us taking the pram.

Thanks for the reminders that Manchester has shops and we just buy the small stuff there. Sounds silly but I kind of completely overlooked that.

I'm hoping to BF but if not a travel sterliser might be the answer.

I wonder if we would need to take a moses basket or could just have baby in with us for the night? Is 2 months too young to have a baby in with us for the night? Sorry, tragically clueless first-timer.

We did this in the car. Long journey much easier with a sleepy wee one than it was later on. We booked room at hotel wedding was in. I fed her in there as I felt boobs out at wedding a bit naff and also had an expressed bottle. We put baby to 'bed' in her pram at 8 and once she was asleep parked her in corner of bar. No way we'd manage this these days

I did a similar train journey when DD was 3mo, and it was fine. Took car seat on buggy base plus sling so DD wasn't always in car seat. Was just me so I had backpack, but with two of you you could easily have a suitcase. Didn't take much stuff for DD, mainly clothes and travel laundry wash, and I co-slept once we were there. I bought nappies while there and breastfed so no need for bottles. You can change baby at main London and Manchester stations, and keep your fingers crossed for the journey!

She did cry a little bit on the train but it was mostly fine, and I felt very proud of myself for getting us both there ok :)

It wouldn't be the easiest journey you ever make, but don't rule out going if you really want to.