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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

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Original poster

Having a baby whilst living in a rented house

44 replies

EggyM · 21/01/2013 18:32

So this is one of my ongoing worries. We do not have a deposit yet to be able to buy a house and DH's poor credit rating means we do not qualify for any schemes or low deposit mortgages- I have researched every possibility for buying a house and succumbed to the fact that it was going to take another 5 years at the very least for us to be in a financial situation to buy a house.
BUT in 5 years I would be in my late 30s so we obviously decided that we would ttc whilst still renting.

I am now pregnant (and thrilled after a mc and a year and a half of ttc) but it still weighs on my mind a lot that we don't own a house (and saving for a deposit is obviously now going to take even longer!) - the lack of security is a big issue (never know if the landlord will decide to sell - our years lease is up in June and haven't told landlord we're pregnant yet -want to wait til 20 week scan really), not being able to personalise the spare room/nursery, it not being our home.

I know there are bigger things to worry about (and believe me I worry about them too!) but just need some people to reassure me that having a baby in a rented house is not so bad...

OP posts:

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Set a reminder

MoodyDidIt · 21/01/2013 18:35

are you serious??

loads of people have babies while in rented property

i have had TWO! imagine.

ffs

cairnterrier · 21/01/2013 18:37

I've had 2! Remember advice is that babies should sleep in the same room as you until they're 6 months old so really no need to decorate a nursery etc. I do think of this as our 'home'. To me, home means the people in it, not the bricks and mortar (or concrete breeze blocks) that surround us. If you're saving for a deposit then you are looking long term to provide security for your baby. If you're worried about the landlord selling, then could you ask for a year's lease? Or even longer? Lots of landlords would be pleased for this as it guarantees them an income on their investment property.

Could part of this be pregnancy hormones kicking in and the nesting instinct and need to provide a home for the baby but magnified a bit?

Anyway, having a baby is wonderful, enjoy every minute, please don't worry if your house is rented or not.

chewingguminmyhair · 21/01/2013 18:38

Of course it will be fine. Have you been good tenants and paid the rent on time? If so make it clear to the landlord that you're in it for the long haul and are keen to stay long term.

And you can personalise your home if rented - just google it! Loads of ideas out there. And your landlord might let you decorate it anyway. They might love you to add a fresh coat of paint. And you can get good quality wall stickers, and decorate the furniture, get pics on the wall, cool mobiles....

Lots of people rent - it's fine! What matters is that you make it a home.

FoofFighter · 21/01/2013 18:40

Eggy :) you are over thinking it, honestly! x

chewingguminmyhair · 21/01/2013 18:42

Stickers m.notonthehighstreet.com/baby-child/childrens-living/painting-decorating/wall-stickers

www.childrens-rooms.co.uk/Wall-Stickers.html

Cakethrow · 21/01/2013 18:42

I not only had two DC in rented accommodation but it was a FLAT too.

I've gone up in the world now though as I had DC3 in a house (still rented though)

Funnily enough, the landlord didn't mind about us having children as long as the rent was paid and the place was kept well - I'm sure yours will be the same. As for your own decoration our landlord is happy for us to do what we like as it makes the tired decor look fresher for no expense on their part.

It really isn't that bad!

hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 21/01/2013 18:43

Will your landlord allow you to decorate if you return it to it's original colour when/if you leave?

FeijoaVodkaAndCheezels · 21/01/2013 18:44

I have two children and live in rented housing. It's fine.

As far as personalising a room removable wall stickers are your friend.

AppleCrumples · 21/01/2013 18:47

Seriously i wouldn't worry! We moved to our rented home 10 years ago when pg with dc1, we're still here and dc4 arrived on new years day :)

plonko · 21/01/2013 19:03

We're expecting our first in 5 weeks and rent a house. Like you we've also been trying to save up a deposit to buy our own place, but what little we have gets us nowhere. It's fine! We have a roof over our heads, all furniture is our own so that's one less thing to worry about, and our landlord is not allowed to have an opinion on the matter.

Like others have said, he's probably pleased because we're less likely to move anytime soon. He's also happy for us to decorate the small bedroom but we've decided not to touch it for another few months.

Pregnancy hormones/nesting instinct perhaps taking over a little?

Original poster

EggyM · 21/01/2013 19:04

Ah thanks everyone - fab to hear your stories. I do really know that its not a major problem - just having one of those days where I'm worrying about everything...

Thanks for all your tips too - will have to have a chat with the landlord in a few weeks re decorating and a longer lease.

OP posts:

iamwhaticallpregnant · 21/01/2013 19:26

We are having a baby very soon and are in a rented house.
1/ Ask for a year contract - landlords are usually thrilled with this and are not likely to want to get rid of their income or sell in this climate and like that they dont have to go through the bother of getting new tenants for a while.
2/ you dont have to tell the landlord or estate agents that you are having a baby - it is none of their business!
3/ sometimes if you ask them if you can decorate 1 room they are very accomodating about it as long as it's not purple or tangerine.
4/ i just got some wall stickers from Mothercare (the Joules Oliver ones) and they are fab - and have put white sheets over the tables etc and you can get a nice rug and really make a room look beautiful without decorating it.

Good luck :-)

cyclecamper · 21/01/2013 21:01

We live in a rented house. I was a live-in nanny until I was 36 and have never had a mortgage. My husband was married previously and left the house to his ex because she had the boys living with her. We have had both the boys living with us for several years and the eldest one's girlfriend now also lives with us. We rent a 3 bedroom house and I'm trying to clear the boxroom so that the baby can sleep in there. 6 of us in here is going to be fun! I think the the big lad and his lady will move out once he's graduated (in the summer) and got a job, but who knows how long that will take! Still, a screaming baby might encourage the younger lad to get trained/a job so that he can find somewhere of his own too, you never know! I don't think there is going to be much decorating done here though.

Badvoc · 21/01/2013 21:07

My parents had 3 dc in a rented house and indeed still live in one and now their 5 grandchildren stay there too sometimes :)

naughtynancy · 21/01/2013 21:14

eh?!

We live in a MASSIVE rented house that we'd never be able to afford to buy. Such a better standard of living for me, DH and our two children...

You know, pretty much the entire rest of the world really cannot understand the English obsession with owning property...

letsgetreadytoramble · 21/01/2013 21:17

We live in a rented house and I felt the same way as you before DS was born - I wanted everything to be perfect for him. But then I asked the landlord if we could paint and decorate and he was more than happy, and as soon as I started decorating the nursery I felt so much better.

Also, the washing machine packed in just after DS was born and the back door broke - landlord came out and fixed them immediately at no cost to us - one of the benefits of renting. Best wishes for the birth, I'm so jealous of you getting to cuddle your little newbie soon

worsestershiresauce · 21/01/2013 21:19

I'm a landlord and the last couple who rented my flat had a baby whilst living there. I was delighted for them.

You do have to tell your landlord if an extra person, be it a baby or an adult is living in the flat as your contract is for the original occupants only. They can't throw you out though, so don't worry on that front. Small kids trash things, all landlords know that, but on the flip side landlords know that families are good long term tenants, so they are usually welcoming and accommodating. I'm still in touch with my ex tenants, and get updates on how the baby is doing.

ImKateandsoismywife · 22/01/2013 01:17

I rent with 2dcs and dc2 was actually born in the flat

expatinscotland · 22/01/2013 01:20

We had 3 DCs while living in rented homes, all but one have been flats. Still in one now, with 2 DCs.

Mosman · 22/01/2013 01:23

I do know where you are coming from, I've had 4 babies and never had the whole nursery thing - least of all when I owned my house because we didn't have the blooming money.
All I can say is whilst I do understand the whole wanting your own space thing, it's an expensive luxury and you can rent a far far nicer house than you can buy at the moment and if the neighbours piss you off or you want to change schools you just move. Simples.

MaMattoo · 22/01/2013 01:25

You and just about all of us first time buyers have been pushed off the end of the property ladder by the current economy.

I had baby in rented apartment - 3 yrs on we are still here, short of space, short of money for a deposit and paying huge sums in rent.

It's ok. Enjoy the baby. I realised the cliche is true - they need very little when they are little. Just you, loads of love, milk and a clean nappy. The whole idea of redecorating before 6 months is silly.

Your hormones could be blamed - in which case brush it off
If that's not the case - chill pill please! It's fine. Many of us are in this position and if it can't be helped, don't stress about it.
And...congratulations!!

Original poster

EggyM · 22/01/2013 06:44

Thanks everyone - reading all your posts has made me feel so much happier

OP posts:

Gracefulbirth · 22/01/2013 09:01

Glad to see you're feeling better. I also gave birth to both my kids while we rented....:)

pettyprudence · 22/01/2013 09:15

i had a homebirth in my rented house and i have decorated ds room Landlord doesnt know ds was born but he knows i decorated the house and is finr with that. you dont have to go that far though
i work for some other landlords and he was that one of his tenants had a homebirth, but only because he didn't know women were "allowed" to do that (as in he thought uou HAD to go to hospital) he rents out to a few other families too.

hoobnoob · 22/01/2013 09:53

Oh OP I could have written that!

I am on my first month TTC and we are in a rented flat, due to move into a rented 2bed house in March.

For me, the biggest cause of my insecurity is due to my family all being fairly comfortable financially, even my younger brother owns 2 properties. But I am getting over some bad financial decisions and slowly paying debts back and my DP was declared bankrupt a couple of years ago so there's no chance we will be able to get a mortgage for a good few years.

I've been wanting to start a family for about 3 years but kept thinking we couldn't as we didn't own our home, but I turned 30 a few weeks ago and we just through sod it, plenty of people have a child in worse circumstances than us.

The stupid thing is, since getting our debt under control, we are now in a much better financial situation than most of our friends with huge mortgages. And renting means if anything goes wrong with the property, it's gets fixed at no cost to us.

Good luck.

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