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Original poster

First chat with boss after telling him I'm pregnant.....

32 replies

M2T · 09/01/2004 10:34

WOW! Wasn't ready for that. He had been working away all week and I had told him by email (such a chicken ). He came in today and said "Can I have a word with you in my office".
My tummy did backflips.... he seemed SOOOOO morose and serious. I thought he was going to say they had been thinking of letting me go or something.
But he didn't!

He said that it was good news and that once I had had my scan I could let him know when I'm ready to go on Mat leave. Then he said that once the the baby was born and I was ready to return to work they could sort out part time arrangements if that suited better!!!!!

I've only been here 6 months so I was expecting a bit of a frosty reception. Its a very male orientated environment and they are all very sexist here.
So I am delighted and I feel MUCH better now.

Just thought I'd share that with you all coz I'm sitting here grinning like a Cheshire cat!

(Do cheshire cats really grin?)

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codswallop · 09/01/2004 10:36

that is great - does he have kids?

Northerner · 09/01/2004 10:38

That's fab M2T. Do you think you will go part time?

madgirl · 09/01/2004 10:44

fan-bloody-tastic m2t, are there any jobs going there?!

Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 10:49

I have thought about 4 days a week, but we just have to look at finances. I would lose a lot more than we would save and until DH gets his arse in gear and earns more money then we are very dependant on my salary.

But we will see. Its just great to know I have that option!

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Northerner · 09/01/2004 10:58

But surely won't childcare for 2 cost you shed loads of cash?

Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 11:11

Yeah, but Ds will be 3 by then so his reduces. By me reducing work by one day I will lose £96 a week from my salary. We will save £36 a week on Childcare..... so we would be £60 a week worse off. Taking into account my travelling expenses which are horrific I think we would end up about £150 a month worse off as it stands at the moment. So it's something we will have to really carefully look at and budget for..

Unfortunately it doesn't work for me to do half days. I work so far away that by the time I picked them up at Nursery I would still be charged for a full day. Very frustrating!

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Northerner · 09/01/2004 11:14

It's so difficult isn't it? This is waht is stopping me from having number 2 just yet.

Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 11:18

Yeah it is a total put-off isn't it. I am trying to convince my Mum to give up work and I'd pay her to look after them, but she's having none of it. She says she's finished raising children and she really enjoys her work which is understandable as my sister is 27 and my youngest brother is 12! This is the 1st time in 27 yrs that she has been able to work as she pleases.

Plus Ds LOVES his Nursery thankfully!

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madgirl · 09/01/2004 11:27

having always said i could never work for myself i am fast coming to conclusion that it is the only way that i will be able to work and pick up ds from school (currently 2.10) and factor childcare in for baby-2-be touch wood (currently 14 wks) and earn a bit of money. mare.....

SpringChicken · 09/01/2004 11:38

Great News M2T - it's lovely to have the options there!

I've just been in arranging my maternity leave, return to work etc with my bosses - they have given my several options too.

I'm definitely leaving 25th June and my maternity leave takes my until January 05 - i have been given the option to work from home 16 hours per week between September and January, however the hours suit me and still keep my full wage (Working for parents has it's good points) OR I can have full maternity leave and just return as normal in January for 5 days a week OR i can have full maternity leave and return in January on a part time basis.

Haven't got a clue what i will do, and probably wont decide for a while yet but it's so nice to have different options available.

Glad everything went well for you

madgirl · 09/01/2004 11:42

tee hee i'm leaving on april 16th!

Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 11:44

Oh SC - You are working until you are 37 wks pg???? Don't do it to yourself!!!!! I was taken into hospital at 37 wks with high BP (nothing too serious and felt fine, its extremely common though) and ds was born 2 wks later. Just keep your options open..... and your legs crossed!

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Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 11:46

Oops, meant to add. I worked until 35 wks pg with ds. But I was getting a lift to and from work. This time I have to use 3 different forms of public transport to go 40 miles so will definitely leave a bit earlier. Perhaps 33/34wks. So that will be >quick calculation< ..... 25 June too!

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SpringChicken · 09/01/2004 11:50

Oh i definitely will keep my legs crossed M2T!

I thought it would be best for me - i get so bored when i'm not at work - i know it sounds sad but it's true.

Plus i figured i would rather have as much time off with the baby as possible.
As it's the 1st, i;m open to options - may decided i want to leave a few weeks earlier if i'm not feeling too great!

P.S I'm never mentioning my EDD again - it has changed about 5 times since i found out i was PG - hospial have given me defo date of 10th July now so that's the one i'm going by!

bunnyrabbit · 09/01/2004 12:23

Springchicken,
This is exactly how I felt.
I worked till I was 38 weeks, and then DS was 9 days late, so I was pleased I left it so late, as I also got very bored and frustrated. Wasn't pleasant working through the summer though!! Trust me to be pregnant through the hottest summer on record.

Incidentally, M2T, where are you that you can get childcare for 2 kids for £36 a day??? It's gonna cost me that just for DS.

BR

dejags · 09/01/2004 12:27

M2T

So glad that things worked out well for you .

I have a bit of work dilemma of my own and was going to post on a separate thread but may as well post on this one - if you don't mind me hijacking your thread for a few posts.

I had some spotting last night - nothing too drastic (it was old blood - sorry to be graphic!).. I spoke to the doctor first thing this morning and explained this and she advised I stay off work today and rest. I then had the dilemma of what to do at work.

I phoned in and said that I was ill in the night and wouldn't be in today. I am worried though because I had a lot of time off last year. DH's mum was very ill in South Africa and I had to spend two weeks out there when she died, DS was also very ill for two weeks and I had to have this time off work too. My manager has been very patient but I have the feeling that this is running out.

I am not sure if I should tell my manager and ask him to keep it to himself. This way if I need to go for an early scan - probably be next Tuesday he will understand.

What do you ladies think?

Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 12:27

Bunnyrabbit - It's actually £24 per day per child, but ds will be 3 and will be entitled to 12.5 hrs a week free in Nursery... so that takes it down a bit. We are in Scotland and the standard amount is anywhere between £22 and £28 per child per day. That doesn't include any meals though, we have to provide all food and drinks and nappies.

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dejags · 09/01/2004 12:27

PS: I am only five weeks along

Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 12:31

Dejags - I think you should definitely tell him/her. On my thread about telling work so soon there was a horror story about one women who held off telling her work. They paid her off before she told them and was entitled to NO SMP! I'm not suggesting you will be paid off..... but I think it only works in your favour to keep them fully informed. And they will have to be discreet about it until you are ready to go public.

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SpringChicken · 09/01/2004 12:34

I would just make him aware Dejags - if you ask him to keep it to himself then he should!

Not sure if it was on thsi thread or bot but someone has mentioned recently being sacked before mentioning to work that she was pregnant and didn;t have a leg to stand on - whereas if she had mentioned it the story may have been different.

Not saying you are going to get sacked but it's worthwhile letting him know just to make sure your job is secure!

dejags · 09/01/2004 12:35

Thanks M2T - I think I will tell him, although I know that once one person knows it will be round the building in a flash - my work is just like that

It seems weird telling anybody this early on - almost like I am tempting fate...

dejags · 09/01/2004 12:36

thanks too SC - our posts crossed!

Lisa78 · 09/01/2004 12:39

good to know I'm not the only one with a good boss! I found out I was pg the 2nd week I was there....!
Hope you don't mind me asking, but what sort of hourly rate do you pay for nursery and childminders?

Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 12:40

lol SC - Great minds think alike eh?!!

Dejags - I feel like that just now and I'm 10 wks. I'll feel like I've tempted fate until I see that wee heartbeat flickering on the scan monitor. Fingerscrossed!

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Original poster
M2T · 09/01/2004 12:42

Lisa78 - I pay £2.40 an hour for Ds's Nursery. It varies hugely depending on what area of the UK you live in. (Assuming you are in the UK!).

In the childcare section there is a whole thread about CHildcare costs. It scared me to see what some people have to pay! Mine is bad enough.

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