Took dd with me to antenatal appt today at hospital where she was born and where we spent five nights as she poorly with suspected infection and also rushed away for cheat suctioning on first night. All very traumatic but ultimately ok. Am now 35 weeks pg with dc2.
So as we get to hospital I cheerfully say to dd "this is a special place as you were born here" then burst into tears. Aaargh. Feel emotionally battered. am I going to think of our difficult start the whole way through giving birth to dc2? Mostly I worry about having to spend the night alone with new baby in hospital on it's first night as that was when I thought dd had died as she was rushed to resus. On other hand I am even more scared of being allowed to take her home for first night in case this one is similarly poorly.