Things you should never say to a pregnant woman

[ellesabe]

"You need to get a grip"

and

"What the heck is wrong with you?"

Are you sure it's not twins... yes, quite sure thank you, grrr

"You are never xx weeks. You aren't that big."

"Such a neat little bump"

"You're carrying it very well."

I just want to tell them all to F off!!!

My boss enquired how I was a few weeks back...

Him: 'how are you feeling Charlotte'
Me: 'tired'
Him: 'why do you think that is'
Me 'because I'm pregnant???'
Him 'does pregnancy make you tired then?'

He is a father of two :(

A colleague told me that I should be grateful my boss was letting me take maternity leave. As if he had any choice!!

At dinner, "oh sorry, you're not allowed prawns/smoked salmon/ sushi/ medium beef / philadelphia, are you?" while taking said food (all of which was fine for preggos) away. Depending on the day I explained while getting a tad teary, or sometimes just growled.
Never get between a pregnant lady and her dinner.

Oh and when I tell you I am pregnant, do not tell me about your miscarriages (yes this happened, it was a work colleague who I hardly knew)!

Also, a work contact asked "was it planned?". Marvellous.

"So you've not had the baby yet?"

Said by Dbro to my face at 38 weeks pregnant. It was pretty clear I had not yet had the baby!

"was it planned?"
FO!! it's none of your business

"hopefully next time I see you you'll have had the baby" - like it's dragging in for YOU ??!!!!

"We've changed your name to chubs" :(

Evidence shows that drinking water will stop the morning sickness and sciatica you have been getting ............

Said by an 'up his own arse' fitness instructor ..........

Evidence shows that if you don't shut up i may have to whack you in the face!

This argument conversation went on for a good 5 minutes and he refused to back down on his point as he was actually convinced he was correct ........

SERIOUSLY !!! what planet are you on ?!

Elderly well-known customer during my first pregnancy: "Oooh, you're carrying it all over aren't you? Look, on your back and everything! It's definitely a boy then. They start causing trouble even before they're born!"

Me: [hhmm] [hshock] [hangry]

It was a girl!

MIL continually says I'm much bigger this time round, the whole world and it's sister tell me I'm tiny/really neat. What does neat really mean? I know Bump big, bigger =you've porked it on charming.

You think you're tired now? Just wait!

Hey fatty! (said to me last time by some very overweight people!)

'Let me tell you about my horrendous birth story....'

You're not going to have any DRUGS during the birth are you? I promise you'll regret it. (Fyi I did not regret it!)

'God you're HUGE!'

'Oh you're pregnant, I thought you'd just been overeating.'

I could go on...for some reason all tact and sensitivity goes straight out the window as soon as you declare you're pregnant. And of course if you object to being compared to having your body discussed and ridiculed it's because of the hormones!!

"Ha ha its like a hump backed bridge" from DH when I showed him the teeny beginnings of a baby bump at the bottom of my belly, underneath my existing "bump" from too much pizza

Any comment on the size of the bump other than: 'What a beautiful bump". I've realised that pregnant women can take it personally and you shouldn't pass comment.

I've had everything from 'Not long now' (I was only four months!) to 'That's the smallest bump I've ever seen for 23 weeks'- all in the same pregnancy!

Datingthedevil- your boss sounds awful!

Pregnant young relative: "I'm going to co-sleep and babywear and EBF and have reusable nappies...."

Me: " Ah HaHaHaHa That's nice."

The day after I'd been released from hospital with Hyperemesis

DH friend: 'you just need to man up really don't you'
...........
Everyone: 'should you be eating that?'

............

Work colleague: 'was it planned?' I was so tempted to say 'no me and DH got shit faced and forgot to use anything, never mind eh?!!

And why is it that some women say the wrong thing even when they have had kids? I think thats the worst!

When my mum says 'wow you are huge' I just hate it, I want to yell 'fuck off'!!

Why do you always look so tired and frumpy?

Said by exp yesterday.

Um because I'm 26 weeks pregnant, bringing up three children on my own including a toddler that doesn't like to sleep. I have borgi g decent to wear as you don't bother to pay csa (incase my children that aren't his benefit from it like spend it on heating or electric) so I can't afford new clothes that fit.

You've been really lazy recently - those stairs need vacuuming.
Also said by exp - answer above.

I was talking to my dh about how one of my friends (who works out loads) has an amazing body....he said 'you look better than her....when you're not pregnant' grrrrrrrrr