Pregnant with no. 3 / 4 / 5...?!

[LimeLeafLizard]

Just wondering if anyone else is pg with their 3rd, 4th, 5th, or more?!

I am newly pg with baby number 4 and finding it a bit different this time.

Yesterday I flicked through a couple of magazines but the content didn't seem that relevant to me. I am quietly happy but not nearly as excited or nervous as I was before, especially the first time.

I know what kind of birth I want (same as the last two times) and I don't need to buy any stuff, so there doesn't seem so much to think about, at least until the scan.

I am also a bit worried about how other people are going to react when we tell them. There seems to be a general view that wanting 4 children must make us mad.

Hope I am not alone?!

[SpringFlowers]

Hi Lime, how are you doing? We have three girls so I expect the inevitable comments about trying for a boy. How many weeks are you now?

It's nice to read comment from others with bigger families, I don't know why people are so odd about it!

[icequeenkate]

Hello. May I introduce myself?

I'm 8+5 (according the the early scan I had today) with DC*4. Had a miscarriage in April (a shock pregnancy but confirmed to me that I REALLY wanted another child, so DH obliged.) DSs currently 8,6 and 2. Love them all as they are so different. Hoping for another boy as not really sure what to do with girls!!

Like many of you, we'd pretty much given everything away, apart from the pram. Budget baby *4.

Now facing the challenge of telling the parents - have kept it quiet after their reaction to my mc earlier in the year. My mother in particular could not understand why I'd want another child when I fell with DS3. She is an only child and so am I. DH is the 2nd of 3, and hated being the middle child. So four is obviously the answer!

[Creamtea1]

Hi all, wanted to join in thread if I may
Currently have 2 ds and ttc number 3. DH wants another boy. I want to be able to curb my temper at a) you're mad wanting 3 kids comments and b) it's only cos you want a girl comments. I know they will come!
Youngest ds is 5 and have given away or sold all baby stuff, have nothing. My parents will be shocked and mum especially will have no interest unless I can confirm its a girl.
But I personally am SO excited!!

[LimeLeafLizard]

Hello Spring! Lovely to see you! I am exactly 6 weeks today. What about you? Hope things have settled down for you now.

Hi icequeen, sorry to hear about your Mum's reaction to your MC. It is always hard to hear negative comments but when they come from your Mum it can feel worse because her view somehow matters more. IME anyway. I am enjoying keeping my pregnancy to myself at the moment.

Creamtea brace yourself because those comments will come. And there is big family pressure on me to have a girl too, as I only have nephews - no girls in my kids generation (yet!). Anyhow, good luck with the TTC!

[morecoffeemorecoffee]

Hi everyone!

Lost this thread for a while.

I need to ask some fellow experienced mums to be some advice! I'm about 6wks preg, maybe 7 (long cycles so not sure of dates until scan) anyway, this is my 3rd pregnancy/ dc and I seem to be filling out very quickly! Is this normal? I remember getting my maternity trousers on at 12wks when I was pregnant with dc2, but already none of my jeans fit! I have 1 pair of trousers and some leggings that I can get on and that's it! I'm not eating Crap either, trying to be quite healthy as I didn't want to gain a lot of weight. Did you find this happened to you on your 3rd and subsequent pregnancies?

[LimeLeafLizard]

Hi again Morecoffee, this thread is back on my 'I'm on' list so just saw your post.

I'm about as far along as you (6 +4) and funnily enough I have noticed the exact opposite this time. With DC1 I was in mat clothes from about 17 weeks, but with DC2 & 3 it was more like 12 - 13 weeks. I had noticed feeling big from almost the time of my BFP but just wore my 'big' normal clothes, iyswim?

This time I still feel like normal, all skinny - normal clothes still fitting etc. Actually it is quite worrying because I keep wondering if all is in fact going ok in there.

In your case, is it bloating that is making you bigger? Unlikely you've put on much weight this early and the pregnancy can't be very big yet, so maybe it is your body retaining water? I think that's what it was for me the last two times.

Not sure what you can do about it though, except go shopping of course!

[morecoffeemorecoffee]

Yes, bloating and I'm pretty sure my hips have widened

I'm just wearing looser long tops and leggings at the moment. Really hoped weight gain would be less this time...

How's your pregnancy going lime?

[LondonAnna35]

Javotte, this is my experience exactly! 25 weeks pregnant with number 3 and when people realise I am pregnant they usually say either 'you're brave' (or some variation), or 'was it planned?' They seem to think because we have one daughter and one son already that a 3rd is an odd choice.

[Bearhugs43]

Hi all and congrats

I am24 weeks with dc4 - have dd7 ds5 and ds2. Another blue bump this time.

All ok so far currently enjoying calm before storm of school hold combined with 3rd trimester!

Can concur with - are you mad comments and having sold all baby equipment.

And we also have the at 'poor dd, another brother....'

Am excited and scared in equal measure at the prospect of a newborn again'

[LimeLeafLizard]

Morecoffee, hopefully the bloating will ease and it doesn't necessarily mean more weight gain overall.

My pregnancy seems to be going quite well so far - only a little tired, slightly bigger boobs, no sickness, no bloating (Yet!). It is quite different to my previous pregnancies in which I felt terrible from the beginning. Although that is great I am a bit worried that something has gone wrong already and I don't know it. Not much I can do about that for now though.

Hello Anna and Bearhugs! How are your DC feeling about another new born in the family?

I am still keeping it all quiet for now... putting off telling people until after the first scan at least and I have some evidence that all is ok. Also saves a few weeks of the inevitable annoying comments!

[4kidsplusbump]

Evening everyone.

We had our 20 week scan today, and confirmed as I thought, that it is definately a boy! Now have to try and collect all the boy stuff back up as we gave it all away when DC4 was a girl, as she was definately meant to be our last

Limeleaf we have kept it quiet up until now, and have only told close friends and family, but have now told the DC's so the secret will definately be out as they will not be able to keep quiet! Only people I haven't told is work....really dreading that one!

Icequeen we also had a miscarriage after DC3, but went on to conceive straight away, and had a successful pregnancy with DD2, and are now onto no.5 - so fingers crossed everything works out with your no.4

Morecoffee I have always been bigger during the pregnancies with boys, were your previous DC's girls? I kept DC4 quiet until 25 weeks, and most people I hadn't told still hadn't guessed at that time. THis time I feel massive...having to hold the stomach muscles in, especially when I'm at work

londonanna I also had that, as my first were a girl and boy people thought we didn't 'need' any more kids.....it was like the only reason you would have more than 2 was if they were the same sex, and you wanted the other sort....!

Nearhugs I am also slightly concerned about the summer holiday situation....we are also away camping for 2 weeks when I will be about 28 weeks - which was booked before I was pregnant! Hoping it's not too manic doing that (or probably just trying to kid myself!)

[HollyWall4]

I have four now. My eldest has four! Big families. Crazy. My sister Maisie is 33 and pregnant with number 6! Sienna is 14, jade is 12, mia is 9, isla is 5, scott is 3 and baby peanut is due on august 17th. Personallyy i think she is mad!

[rogersmellyonthetelly]

I'm 7weeks with dc3, I have a 7yo and 6yo, boy and girl, people think we are nuts and that this is a whoopsie-baby but I had ivf so it's totally planned!
Have nothing at all baby wise as we were sure dd was our last, but had a big change of heart and now I have everything to get all over again. Totally agree about those pregnant with first baby, it' seems all consuming and all they want to talk about, I can't think any further ahead right now than my first scan on Friday, if that all goes ok I will start getting properly excited.
Currently feeling as as sick as a dog and so tired I could cry!

[LimeLeafLizard]

Hello,

4kids so your scan went well, then? Glad to hear you'll have a new little son. Hope you manage to get some of your boy clothes back, if not I guess its a shopping trip for you then! Good luck telling work.

Holly wow it must be fun in your family! Your sister is still young so hopefully will have plenty of energy to look after her gang... or will you be called on to help out?!

rogersmelly glad to hear your IVF worked and congrats on your pg. Hope your early scan goes well.

I've had my first doc appt, to register, and am waiting for a mw to call and arrange booking in. I was given the mat pack including Emma's diary (have you been given that?) and it is comfortingly familiar. There's Emma, still having her first baby now I'm on #4!

[DiamondsAndDaisychains]

Hi Limeleaf
I've wanted six children since I was little and everyone rolled their eyes and said "wait till you have one, then see what you think!" I am currently pregnant, expecting my sixth child in November this year, and I encounter all sorts of interesting comments and responses, so when I saw your post I just had to comment. I wrote a whole article about it, in fact! (diamondsanddaisychains.com/?p=112) I'd love to hear what you or anyone else with lots of children has to say about their experiences with a big family and comments you attract from close friends and family as well as complete strangers, who I find by far the rudest and most judgmental despite having no idea about me and my life! x

[morecoffeemorecoffee]

Hi all. Had my booking in appt with mw last week. No emmas diary this time :( I remember that from me previous pregnancies though!

I'm expecting plenty of "are you hoping for a girl this time?" and "was it planned?" type comments as I have 2 boys and my youngest is 4, so will be nearly a 5yr age gap when the baby arrives (took a yr and half to conceive this little bump). I don't really care though, as long as people are not nasty.

[annelid]

Hi all, I'm expecting no.7 in December. We have 3 girls & 3 boys from 16 - 6, so bit of a gap for this one! Most people have been really pleased for us, but as its not widely known yet I'm sure there will be more comments to come!

[Creamtea1]

Morecoffee - same here but add another year to my gap. The worst comments I think will be from my family (parents especially) I think I can deal more with strangers/work as can be rude back but with family it gets to me.

[mrsdaisaku]

My situation is a little different, i'm 13weeks, I have a DD8 and two step daughters who visit every other weekend. But my husband and I wanted a child that would unite the children together and give them all something in common, it happened a little earlier than intended, but we were over the moon when it happened. I never wanted more that two children, so it was perfect for me.

However, we've been given the blessing of twins... So now between us we will have 5 kids and mostly what we've found is people saying, you're mad, double trouble, you're going to have your hands full etc etc... Except I will only have three children myself and 5 every other weekend, which really, is no different to having neices and nephews to stay. I'm really not liking the mixture of negativity and positivity. Why can't people just be happy if you're happy??

[4kidsplusbump]

Welcome to all the newcomers! Good to see I am no longer the one with the most DC's

Diamonds and Annelid you are making me feel alot more normal about only having 5 DC's! We have told the kids this week after our scan, so am expecting lots of comments now, as they will have been busy telling everyone at school (have been at work the last 2 days - so not seen any school people!) Will have all that to come tomorrow when I take them to school If only I had £1 for everyone that is going to tell me I'm crazy....!

Mrsdaisaku eek twins! Excellent news! I also have a step son but unfortunately we don't ever see him due to problems between DH and his ex (he has visited once in the last 4 years!) - otherwise we would be up to 6 including him!

Limeleaf I'm not planning on telling my work until I have to - which is another couple of weeks away! Have a few weeks booked off in the summer hols anyway, after which I'll be 29 weeks, and definately starting my maternity leave as early as possible this time as I'm hating my job at the moment

[cjbk1]

Good morning can I jump in here? I'm expecting my 3rd and if I'm honest I think my ds and dd are playing up quite a lot now I'm pg, ds(age 6) esp seems to be really testing the boundaries and when I do
issue a punishment he laughs at me, of course he's lovely at some times but seems to be reacting to the pregnancy, dd(age 4) is a lot 'easier' but does get rages
and has hit my bump a few times.if they were younger I'd ask HV for advice but don't know what to do now? any help? thanks in advance x

[4kidsplusbump]

Welcome CJ how many weeks are you?

I have been quite lucky and all my DC's have been really happy about having new babies in the family. They do play up about other stuff though

Would including them in stuff about the baby help? I know in previous pregnancies I have let them pick a cuddly toy and help choosing any other bits the new baby might need? It is hard though isn't it. I do find mine go through stages....at the moment DS2 is being a pain, he is almost 2, so too young to know what is going on with another baby! This morning he screamed all the way to school and back again!

I think with the punishments you have to find something that works for each child. My oldest 2 (6 and 5) have a cross chart, and for every cross they have it's 10 mins off bedtime at the end of the day....works a treat for them as they hate going to bed early

[cjbk1]

thanks 4kids I'm 29 weeks tomorrow I'll try to include them more and yes ds hates going to bed early

[LimeLeafLizard]

Hello all, nice to see some more faces here!

Well I spoke too soon about not feeling any bigger! I have been quite bloated the last few days, and am feeling self concious about it.

The midwife was supposed to call to arrange a booking appt once she received the GP referral... how long should I wait to phone and ask about it? (Its been 8 days so far).

CJ, hello! Are you sure your DC are playing up because of the pg, and not just because that is a stage they've reached? DS1 went through a really cheeky stage when he was 6 - always arguing back and trying to be clever. He also had a few probs at school when DS3 was due, and the teachers kept saying it it was because he was worried about me and the baby, but that was a red herring - he had actually fallen out with a couple of his friends and when that was sorted he was fine.

*Diamonds I read your blog . I don't have any mention-worthy comments from this time round yet but I'll let you know!

MrsD congrats on the twins - how lovely for you and your DH to join your family together that way. Hope the older sisters will be happy to help out a bit when the time comes!

[cjbk1]

limeleaf I'm not completely sure but I take dd hitting my bump as jealousy