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Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Original poster

Bright red blood loss, 13 weeks, please hold my hand

107 replies

TeaJunky · 29/05/2012 23:58

I don't know where to begin, and even
As I type this I have tears of sadness and exhaustion welling up in my eyes.

I started bleeding yesterday morning. Im 13 weeks.
I went in to hospital today who have given me a scan for thursday. The doctor said its likely to be a miscarriage.
Oh it's been a stressful pregnancy to say the least. Everyone told me to take it easy, and I thought I was invincible.
Now look what I've gone and done.

This baby was supposed to be a bouncing, happy healthy little babe. DD thinks she's
Getting a baby brother or sister when the
snow comes. Oh it will break her little heart.

Just looking for a hand to hold to get me through this horrid night.

OP posts:
CharminglyOdd · 30/05/2012 00:06

I'm so sorry.

goingmadtrying · 30/05/2012 00:08

offering you a hand to hold until Thursday, if this is a miscarriage and until the scan shows that there is still hope this is not your fault, have you had a scan already with being past 12 weeks, i had some spotting from 7-16 weeks, and one particularly heavy episode and im currently 30 weeks, please don't lose hope and try and stay positive, easier said than done i know xx

Original poster
TeaJunky · 30/05/2012 00:11

Thank you charming and going Sad

I was supposed to have my 12 week scan last week but missed it as I opened the letter too late - things are manic and I just didn't get the time.

OP posts:
Jac1978 · 30/05/2012 05:08

I can't tell you if it is or it isn't a miscarriage, the warning signs are usually bleeding and pain but I do know women who have bled and it's been nothing. The doctor is probably preparing you for the worst but don't write your baby off yet until you know for sure. I would strongly advise to take someone with you for support when you have your scan and if you work tell them in advance that you won't be back in that day after your appointment to save you having to call them if you've had bad news. The one thing I really want to stress is that miscarriage is very very common and although it may help to make sense of it to tell yourself you caused it, I must stress that it is not your fault. If your baby is lost at this early stage it's likely to be because somethIng wasnt right from day one. It unfortunately happens to lots of women and there's nothing you can do about it, you certainly can't cause it just by overdoing things so please please don't blame yourself. It's hard because the thing you need most is a reason and all you can be told is that it's just one if those things. I went through a miscarriage myself not long ago and I wont lie it was a painful experience both physically and mentally but I did cone through it and time was a great healer so eventually I was able to try again. All I can say is that whatever happens on Thursday just stay strong, be kind to yourself and know that whatever tomorrow brings you will be ok in the end. Take care, I will be keeping everything crossed for you xxxxx

curiousparent · 30/05/2012 06:23

I do hope that it is not bad news. I had a really bad bleed at about the same time, I went to the Dr and he practically confirmed that it was a m/c and gave me 'the talk'. I had to wait a few days for a scan but all was well in my case. I did have another big bleed at about 24 weeks but again all was fine. I was also incredibly busy (working very long hours and over seeing a house extension) but I was told that there is nothing that you do that makes a difference - if things are not going to end correctly you cannot change it.

All the best, please don't be beating yourself up x

randomimposter · 30/05/2012 07:34

Tea I'm so sorry you have this worry. So have you had any scans at all so far?

I had a massive red bleed at 14 weeks with DS (now 4), 10 days after my nuchal scan and when I had told everyone. It was a threatened MC and I bled a bit for a few days. He was/is fine.

But I have had 5 MCs since, at various stages, 3 of them missed until scan, so I know the worry and the sadness all too well.

Only a scan will tell you, FX all goes well tomorrow.

randomimposter · 30/05/2012 07:36

and just to add if this is a MC it is absolutely not your fault.

PeggyCarter · 30/05/2012 07:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
TeaJunky · 30/05/2012 07:55

Thank you for everyone's wonderful, reassuring posts. Can't believe all the posters who have said they've bled and it's been fine.
As soon as I started bleeding, people I alerted at work & family said you've been rushing around, busy all say every day till bed time, you need to take it easy etc etc. I guess they were trying to be helpful but when you're panicking and confuse already , it sounds like a fault that could have been avoided.

I suppose I must have cried myself to sleep last night. I am mentally debating at the moment whether I should go in to work or not - I have told them I'm not coming in and will brief my teaching assistants but now I'm thinking I will go in - my class help me forget everything, and give me such lovely random hugs. I do have a stinking cold too though. Just checked and no bleed overnight or this morning! SmileSmileSmile hope it continues like that..

OP posts:
welliesandpyjamas · 30/05/2012 08:09

Obviously, I don't want to raise your hopes too much but just wanted to tell uou that I also had the same - heavy, bright red bleed for an hour but no pain...and well, you can imagine our surprise when at the scan we found baby was still there and doing fine :) Currently 21 weeks.

Sometimes these things happen. It was a blood clot next to the sac, nothing to do with the baby. I truly hope it turns out that way for you too.

goingmadtrying · 30/05/2012 08:12

do what feels right for you, you change the outcome but if do go in take it as easy as you can, the more i think about when i had bright red blood loss it was when they diagnosed a polyp on my cervix, i never had any spotting or bleeding after they'd diagnosed it :) only one more sleep and you will know for sure, its good you've stopped bleeding :) work may make the day go quicker too Hmm

Mama1980 · 30/05/2012 08:15

How are you this morning? I don't want to give false hope but I had a massive bleed at 8-12-14 weeks and numerous scans each showed my babe just fine. My Son is now 4. I know how terrifying it is Sad please though if you have miscarried remember it is not in anyway your fault, the was nothing you could or should have done different. Take care I really hope you get good news tomorrow.

theressomethingaboutmarie · 30/05/2012 08:21

OP to make it clear, it's nothing that you have done so please try to stop thinking that way. I had an MC last year at 11 weeks and due to horrid sickness, we'd already let DD know. She dealt with the loss very well as we were very candid with her (putting it in child-friendly terms of course).

My heart goes out to you.

Original poster
TeaJunky · 30/05/2012 08:25

mama - no bleeding yet today! I'm trying not to be too excited and wait for the scan to confirm things.

Ive decided not to go in. Have a horrible cough and cold so will try to get some stuff for that and rest it off a little. DD is happy to unexpectedly have mummy home for the day!
She just looked out of the window and said 'it's still sunny, not snow time yet'. I wanted to cry, because I know each morning she wakes up hoping its snowed so the baby can be here.

OP posts:
TheQueenOfSheba · 30/05/2012 08:27

Please Google 'Sub Chorionic Hematoma'. It might be one of those. I have had 3 in this pregnancy so far, with massive bleeding.

Don't want to get your hopes up, though.

Original poster
TeaJunky · 30/05/2012 08:27

Yes, theressomething, that's the reason why we told DD, not to mention the fact that I have a big family and she kept asking forlornly why so and so has a brother or sister and she hasn't. Sad

OP posts:
Original poster
TeaJunky · 30/05/2012 08:30

I know it's clutching at straws here, but do pregnancy symptoms like sickness suddenly disappear this early on if it IS a MC or do they stay around till the MC kicks in properly?
I was feeling sick yesterday, and am a little bit sick today.

OP posts:
Mama1980 · 30/05/2012 08:39

In my limited experience the symptoms hang around a bit as do the pregnancy hormones, I continued to test positive for a couple of weeks after my mc and felt very sick-nature can be very cruel. Try to enjoy the day with your dd I will have everything crossed for good news tomorrow.

TheQueenOfSheba · 30/05/2012 08:39

Is there any way you could get a scan?

crowface · 30/05/2012 08:44

Hope everything's ok with you. I had bleeding early on in my pregnancy, I think it's actually quite common. I also had bleeding for a week before I delivered, 3 weeks early. My son is a year old now and very healthy and happy.

Spinity · 30/05/2012 08:56

I had a massive bleed at 12 weeks and am still bleeding daily now at almost 16 weeks. I too was given the miscarriage talk but the scan the following day showed baby was fine. It was a subchorionic haemorrhage and now also cervical ectropion, so bleeding can just be a normal part of some pregnancies, it doesn't always mean disaster.

At least that's what I keep trying to remind myself :)

Good luck and hope you get good news tomorrow x

goingmadtrying · 30/05/2012 10:00

enjoy your day with your dd and i hope your cough and cold feels better, just reread my post from this morning, it clearly should have said you can't change the outcome:) (sorry sleep deprivation!) in terms of symptoms they can come and go certainly after 12 weeks as the placenta takes over, sending you lots of positive vibes. what time is your scan tomorrow x

SwissArmyWife · 30/05/2012 10:43

Bleeding in early pregnancy is indeed very common as others have said, and the fact your bleeding has subsided today is a very good sign.

Just remember that if it is bad news, it is something that hasn't been quite right from the start, and nothing that you've done to cause it.
Don't blame yourself.

I'm hoping so much that your baby is ok, and wishing you the best of luck for tomorrow, stay strong :) x

Original poster
TeaJunky · 30/05/2012 11:44

Thank you so much for all the lovely posts again.

Just a quick update, I've started getting period-pain like cramps. Very slight, dull ones, but definitely there. Sad

Still no sign of any bleeding. But there is a dragging sensation in my stomach. And when I stand up my bottom half feels heavy. Sad

I'm going out with DD. This waiting around is driving me mad.

OP posts:
Midgetm · 30/05/2012 11:45

Did the doctor check if your cervix open?

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