I am going through a divorce, having been unhappily married for 7 years. I have 2 children with my (former) husband (both under 7). He and I were initially in agreement that the marriage should end, but he is finding the process very difficult and is currently very bitter and hostile.
I have started (resumed?) a relationship with someone I have known for years. It is still early days, but we have always been good friends (despite deliberately staying out of each other's lives when we got married to other people) and it's lovely to have this very easygoing, mutually supportive relationship in the background, even though my primary focus is managing the end of my marriage properly, for the sake of my children. We live a long way apart (and both have a lot to sort out in our personal lives), so only see each other once every 10 days or so.
I have fallen pregnant. The child is my friend's.
I have 2 young children and I worry desperately for the impact upon them. The practical difficulties, the potential for gossip, the financial worries. My husband would be incredibly hurt, angry and bitter about it and, i suspect, not be too averse to seeking to undermine my relationship with my children. He is rather prone to bleating on about perceived unfairness in front of the children (which is awful - and no amount of pleading will make him stop).
My friend is going through a very difficult divorce as well. He has a young child.
My husband has always harboured hostility for my friend. Rightly, I suppose. We have never had a relationship before, but there has always been an edge to our friendship. My friend's wife has also always disliked me, for similar reasons.
I have a reasonable job (not exactly high-flying, but comfortable and with a decent range of perks).
It would be so difficult.
I can't bear the thought of terminating the pregnancy. I can't bear the thought of making my children's lives more difficult than they already will be.
Help me. Please be honest.