Keeping it quiet at qoek

[madeindevon2]

Has anyone managed to keep quiet at work re pregnancy until 20 weeks. I'm hoping to. I'm only 10 weeks at moment....

It depends on when your bump appears, and whether you have morning sickness. Kind of gives it away when you're retching in the toilets every day and your stomach is rapidly expanding!

I managed til 15 weeks, I'm 18 now and reckon I could have gotten away with it size wise for a bit longer, but I was sick of feeling like I had to choose my clothes really carefully and after 2 previous mcs I felt like I'd been hiding pregnancies forever! Id also had more sick days and wanted them to know why! My friend did wait until near 20, but I'd say it depends what you do cos in some jobs you might be asked to undertake activities you shouldn't really be doing.

Ok thanks. Had no sick days so I guess it's just a case of concealing my expanding bump! Will see how long I can manage to conceal. Office based job.1

Can I just ask why you want to keep it a secret that long? Obviously you should be having a risk assessment at your desk as soon as possible and unless your work know, they won't be able to organise this! Bear in mind that the relaxin your body produces makes you more liable to muscle strain (back problems) and if you do a lot of typing, carpel tunnel can also be a higher risk during pregnancy.

I do an office based job and told my work when I was only 10 weeks and they have been massively supportive - risk assessments, offers of using the "sick room" if it all gets too much etc.

Do you think they might not look favourably on you if you tell them or is it more personal than that? Remember you have plenty of extra rights as a pregnant lady.

Hugs

Ria x

I was asked to keep it quiet till after SAT's when I would have been 18 weeks but by 15 there was no hiding it and loads of parents told me they had guessed when I did announce (mainly as my boobs got huge according to lots of the mum's) Was less stressful when everyone knew as could get more help and was expected to stay off feet more.

i'm 18 weeks and haven't told yet. Last time I was 23 weeks or something. I thought I'd have to by now because of the bump, but I think I'm still getting away with it. I'll tell in the next week or two because after that I'm going on holiday for two weeks and will probably come back absolutely massive!
I was waiting to get past my performance review and next pay rise - though now I've been offered a theoretical promotion that won't be clear for another couple of months - not great really.

Unfort I know from bitter experience Ria that yes it can affect your career and it's very difficult to prove! I had a risk assessment in my last job. I don't feel its necessary again, I am aware of the issues. I already have a great chair, foot stool and desk that I can raise up. I often spend half the stood up as do many of my colleagues. Most of my day is spent on phone. I am due pay review and discretionary bonus. I do not want them to know I'm pregnant until this is sorted. If they know I'm going on mat leave they won't feel the need to pay to keep me!

I have a manager who I don't think will be sympathetic and is maternity cover, so I'm hoping to wait till he's gone. Have discretely told a couple of colleagues who have been covering me (helping me duck out of social events and activities that involve me walking distances). It is really hard though, especially when we're planning activities for next year and I'm almost certain I won't be there...