Maternity Leave: Earlier or later?

[bigscaryeyes]

I am due xmas eve and plan to take my maternity leave at 32weeks. I am already and have been switched off from work ( i teach in a secondary school) for the last few weeks. DH and I have worked out maternity budget etc but I now feel v v guilty for not trying to stay longer as other mums to be seem to manage to (my first baby also).

I have been suffering from mild SPD which is getting me down (off work today), but at the same time I do work part-time as a BodyShop@Home consultant - so its not as if I would be totally doing nothing.

Is there anyone else feels pressured to do the supermum thing and work til your waters break - whats your views ladies?

I haven't worked during this pregnancy as i finished uni then couldn't find a job...
for me I can't imagine i would have been able to work, especially the last few weks..i have spd too..and hopefully it won't be the same for you..but mine has really flared up as the baby gets bigger and settles into position.
You shouldn't feel guilty, it's important that you are in good health and realxed before the birth, so if you feel you want to take the time off then do so!

I think most women work as late as they can simply to maximise the time with the baby before they go back to work. I did a straw poll on here when wondering to finish and most people came in at about 36 weeks.

soory...i'm 35 + 3...

and what a great excuse for you to avoid the stress and hassle over christmas!

i domn't feel pressurised to do the supermum thing, but I do want to work for as long as poss so I have more time off witht he baby once he or she is here.
With lottie, my 1st I worked up until a week before the due date but Lottie was 10 days late in the end and I was getting very fristrated hanging round at home waiting.
this time baby is due 22nd dec and i am taking more time off firsdt, mainly beacuse I want to have some time with lottie before the bay arrives. so my last day of work is 5 Dec this time, BUT, I might end up working a week more, pending how I feel. i am more tired this time, and 4 years older than last time and so on.

You just do whatever you feel is best for you hon'
Good luck, TC x

I stopped at about 36 1/2 weeks last time, I managed to tag 2 weeks annual leave onto that so official stopping date was 38 1/2 weeks. However, I only got one weeks of maternity leave before the baby arrived.

I think it's down to the individual if you feel you want some more time off before hand then take it. This time I'm A SAHM so no time off!!

BeanSP I figured that does seem to be the average time to go. I am able to take 7 months off at the other side and then return to work for a couple of weeks then it will be summer hols so I should get a total of 9months - this is what we have budgeted for. Having being off yesterday and today with SPD I just feel weak and frustrated. I am due to start a 10 course tomorrow thats spread out between now and nxt july which will allow me to achieve a third of a masters degree.

So on one hand I feel quite chuffed I'm doing my course and bodyshop stuff whilst on maternity but guilty for not sticking it - the traffic and having to deal with students just totally turns me off work.

I think it's a very personal chocie depending on your own feelings and situation.

My baby is due on 4th december and I will be giving up work at 37 weeks.

I'm trying to work as late as possible so I can have lots of time off after the baby is born. My assistant had a baby last year and she finished so early she got really bored being at home.

I have to admit at 33.5 weeks I am finding it hard going, but I only work a few mins from home (so no long commute) and I sit down all day doing nothing - as maternity cover has kicked in - so why sit at home wasting my mat leave when I can sit here being paid for it!

I've got another 3.5 weeks to go and although I'm counting the days until I finish I'll stick it out till the end!

BSEyes - I worked until 35 wks with my first. Ended up in hospital from 37.5 wks until he was born at 39+2!!!

2nd one I stopped at 34wks. I also had mild SPD and just couldn't face it any longer. But am the main earner, I would have finished earlier if finances had allowed it just so I could have longer afterwards.

Its entirely up to you! I really really enjoyed my time off before the babies arrived though.

Thanks TBAT thats the thing I'm finding with this preggy business is that is so individualised its hard to find your own little way at times. I must admit also I dolike the idea of being safely at home tucked up away from the immenent cold weather. I also remind myself that i have never not worked since leaving school and I have worked hard thru uni and have est career etc - but alas still feel guilty!

I worked till 38 weeks because the money was too good to miss - I had 2 weeks leave left so took those at the very end and didn't actually start maternity leave till my due date.

If it hadn't been for the money, I would much rather have stopped earlier - I had mild SPD too and my hips were really painful at the end of a day at my desk (god knows what they'd be like after a day's teaching) and I was too knackered to do any decent work anyway.

There aren't any supermums - you do what feels right for you .

I am working till 38wks !!! this is my first and though i would take all my leave after bubs is born... I am now 30 wks..

AM I MAD !!!!

Just to scare the pants off you - when I had dd I actually went to work whilst I was in labour - she arrived later the following day!

I had 2 weeks off (which you legally have to) and then went back to work.

God - having 7 months off this time is going to be bliss

Both times I breezily (sp?) announced that I would work till the end, but my body told me differently.

Finished about 6 weeks before dd1 and nearly 8 wks before dd2, but I had high bp and was anaemic (sp??) with her so my midwife sternly told me off.

If I had felt fine I would have worked later as obv it is better to have the time with the baby, but not if it is to the detriment to your pregnancy and health.

Thanks SW and Fang - we are not loaded but I do feel lucky that we can afford what we have planned, as a collegue of mine can't due to financial stuff. We are on a tight budget also and have made a real effort (except or the odd dominoes! )

With my first, I stopped work at 36 weeks. He was ten days late, so had a long time to myself (didn't fully appreciate it though - lol!).

I'm pg again, 27+3 now, and have mild SPD too. I want Christmas off, so I'll probably work until 36 weeks again - I'm 37 weeks on Christmas Eve!

I'm working longer because it's easier to be at work than DS-wrangling (he's 18mo now and very lively!). I work four days a week, and want as much leave after the baby's born as possible - I expressed milk when I came back last time (DS was 6mo) and I would do the same this time, so want the baby old enough not to need much milk while I'm away If I can be off a full year, that'd be fantastic.

Take the time you need - and make sure you enjoy it! It sounds like you have everything worked out really well financially, so don't feel guilty, just enjoy!

Thanks hpumpkin I feel a little better now after reading these posts. This SPD business has got me down too - MW forgot to make referal to physio I think from now on I'm just going to make the most of it - make cushions and christmas cakes!!!

Also - I guess next year when I'm working full time again and doing 2hrs worth of commute and a nursery run I won't be feeling guilty!

I'm a SAHM and I don't feel guilty about it. So there .

I have no Protestant work ethic though.

I left work at 29 weeks ( the earliest you can) on all my pregnancies. And didnt feel guilty either. If you have SPD maybe your GP would sign you off sick. That way you would still get sick pay until your mat leave started.

Morning sickness was so bad in the first trimester that I had to go from full time to part time hours at school (teacher).
Continued working p/t until the last day of the school year when I was 22weeks pregnant. Am now almost 35wks and have been at home since. I would not have been able to have coped with the heavy workload & commuting thereafter and also felt guilty about returning to work in September only to leave the kids mid-term.
It has worked out well and I can honestly say that there are adv's and disadv's to being at home for this long but on the other hand there are equally the same with work.
I think you have to go with what's best healthwise, you know your own body.
All the best x

Fullmoon - LOL v true - its almost as if society has us brainwashed to think that its not cool or the done thing to want to be a SAHM or fulfil traditional female roles.

Although i do have established career i would love to be a SAHM at least in the short term. I'm not anti feminsim or anything because for me its about having the choice. Those who want to work: work with equal everything and those who prefer to fulfil traditional roles should be allowed to do so without sideways looks.

I stopped at 34 weeks, was also having discomfort in SP joint that was getting worse. Think you have to stop when you feel it's the right time and not pay any attention to what everyone else is doing. Im glad I stopped earlier than planned, as I feel rested and ready for new arrival now. Also SPD has settled down lots.
Enjoy your time off I say!

OOOH chacha and Kris I can feel sum mummy power rising in my belly - think I will visit GP and see whats what - considering the MW forgot the referal to physio from a request 2 wkks ago (been waiting patiently since for appointment ).

I had a lot of time off during first trimester as we lost a twin and had 3 scares with this one I don't want to 'pester' them for more time off but I think I should make enquiries (EEEEE after i struggled all thru last week aswell - and no-one thanks you for it)

ChaCha your post has reassured me I think you know where I'm comming from re students and traffic - I will start to listen to my body more. DH has been quite concerned if all this meant there was somthing wrong with the baby i know he prefers me to be safe too - and he does have a protestant work ethic (LOL) he normally thinks you have to be dying before you off work - but he is a taxman!

I know, Bigscary. Activities that are traditionally female are never really very cool are they? You don't get many men clamouring to increase the number of male midwives or see many articles about knitting in FHM, do you?

Fullmoon - You certainly don't - that reminds me I have my cross-stitch upstairs started over five years ago that i cud get out! I feel much more cheered

the later you work in pregnancy the higher the chance of you having and early/lower birthweight baby.

I don't agree with the argument that you should take less time at the beginning to have more time at the end - I personally think it is really important to leave work a bit earlier if you can,and do lots of resting and nesting etc. Pregnancy is an incredibly physical thing, and it is a very recent thing that one should be expected to keep dashing around as if nothing changes until the baby comes out. And 2 weeks extra before the baby arrives is, IMO, HUGELY more valuable than an extra 2 weeks at the end (ie going back to work when baby is 22wks or 24wks old doesn't make much difference).

I think you should go with your instincts, and if you are feeling tired, switched off and have SPD probs already, then leave work a little earlier and give yourself a chance to recharge before labour and those KNACKERING first few months.

Just my opinion!!