Thoughtless things that non-pregnant people/shops/services do that annoy you?

[PukeyMummy]

In Tesco earlier, wanted to buy a Mother & Baby magazine. Obviously the best place to put a Mum & Baby magazine is on the top shelf. Yes, the top shelf.

Obviously not done deliberately or maliciously, just very thoughtless .

I don't really want to get into MIL/DH-bashing, but another example would be DH cooking eggs/fish next to me in the kitchen after I've just told him I'm feeling sick with morning sickness. Or MIL spending the entire weekend banging on about food/new recipes when I've also told her the same.

What thoughtless things do non-pregnant people/shops/services do that annoy you now you're pregnant? The more trivial the better!

(I'm a bit bored today, can you tell?)

stegasaurus am 100% with you on the short jeans...v.v.annoying!

Keep 'em coming ladies...hopefully this way we can vent it all on here and avoid taking it out on others!

1. the way people feel the need to 'offer' advice on how to care for babe when its born (no names MIL despite the fact I already have 3 LOVELY DCs!)

2. the fact that when I yawn as I havent slept for 3 weeks I its ignored but when DH yawns MIL fusses around him for being sooooo tired working hard and throwing me the "well you're on maternity leave why arent you looking after hubby" look (ummm 3 DDs, 2 dont sleep...hello?)

3. the fact that JUST when I fancy a cheese pasty from Greggs because its the ONLY thing I really wanna eat/crave...DH buys me a Sausage & bean melt instead ....and then when I do finally get 2 cheese ones in to stock up...DDs/DH eat it before I can get to it!

4)People reacting with an "oh my GOD!" when I say its my 4th baby....I remember people going "ahhh" with my first!

5)anybody generally existing when I'm in the throes of a narky pregnancy hormone induced rage!!!

Following on from the 'Do they think short women don't get pregnant' comment. I don't think that they think tall ones do either. Next do XL in all their non-maternity jeans & trousers, but only R or L in their maternity ones.

Seems you can only get pregnant if you are 5' 6"!

Oh, and Boots put the ante natal vitamins on the bottom shelf - can't bend down very easily to get them at 34 weeks.

at Next too for the same reason. I have resorted to buying cropped trousers and leggings for that reason which are often that little bit too short so in the winter I am getting extra cold!

MIL giving me scales as a Xmas present...

People grabbing at my bump im so tempted to pat their bellies back can you imagine :)

Being told i am enormous especially by people who i could share clothes with even at 36 weeks gone!

People who have never been pregnant making out like your making a fuss over nothing and "pregnancy isn't an illness" no but it does have some pretty nasty side effects that are REAL and not pretend :)

Really think its just people not thinking though also lots of nice things like people asking how I am and strangers smiling at me and opening doors etc :)

The 'are you sure its not twins' comment. We had ivf treatment and therefore 2 embryos were put in. Friends and family know this and I do feel sad when they make the comment. For all we know for 3 weeks it could have been twins.

Soooo with you all on the short length maternity trousers / jeans!

Also:
Most maternity ranges consisting of frumpy, shapeless clothes :(

Seriously fat guy who gets on my bus to work & glares at me like I should give up my seat so he can plonk his lard arse down (my bump isn't that obvious at 21 weeks so I have started making a point of rubbing it lovingly whilst being glared at by him) :o

Everyone that got on my bus to work reeking of B.O, fags, booze, generally anything vomit-inducing during my morning sickness :(

The office slut/cow/dimwit who doesn't know much about pregnancy/babies/kids but feels it is appropriate to ask me in front of the rest of the office if my baby is planned, when we concieved & bizarrely, if I still had "the baby blues" (I'm pregnant with DC1)

Aaaaarrrrrghhhhh... vent.

I also agree with the at the lack of jeans/trousers for those of us who are short legged and pregnant! Though I did manage to find a pair of size 8, short length, over the bump jeans. So comfy and they were from the Next Clearance shop so cheap. They are one of the best fitting pairs of jeans I've ever owned, shame I won't be able to wear them when I have a baby and not a bump. (Strangely the actual Next shop never has jeans in my size in the petite section )

Also, Debenhams why do you insist on putting the Maternity bras on the lowest rack? And why do you never have any in my size?

People who ask "was it planned?", "have you been trying long?" and even one.. "oh, is that good news?". Most people are lovely, but that's just weird.

I am 33 and have been in a happy relationship with DP for 7 years. Anyway, imo the only acceptable response to "I am pregnant" is "congratulations".

hallamoo I'm 5'6" and Next trousers are way too long for me :o.

I am often out of breathe (18 weeks) and I have a friend that insists on walking so fast that I have to jog just to keep up. I have now started to resort to grab his arm politely and pull him back - saying for the 100th time "can you please slow down." The last time we met for lunch though I was so tired afterwards I went home and had a nap.

Train seat rage. I find on the tube that people are pretty good at giving me a seat (I am visiably preg) but on commuter trains? Hell no. Yesterday two women even looked directly at me, my 'baby on board' button and bump and then sat there to continued reading their papers. Hello?!

the shops only making nice maternity bras upto a d. i'm sorry but i dont want a bra that could be mistaken for a slingshot.

Actually I did get a bit annoyed yesterday after my cheery post - I went into the flagship M&S in Manchester to have a look at a cardigan, but the usual section was gone. Spent 10 mins finding someone to ask where it had moved to, & she had to go check as she didn't know. She came back to say the section was gone & was now available online only!

It was there last week - you'd think they could have put a sign up that it would be changing. And why not have it in store anyhow?

Also our Gap puts their maternity range in the basement, which is two tiring flights of stairs if you don't want to wait for the lift (which is often taken up with stockroom movers)

grumble

Just realised the M&S bit might not make sense - it's their maternity range which has vanished.

People who ask "and are we pleased about it?" in a patronising tone when you tell them you're pregnant like they imagine you're actually really angry about it.

When I was pregnant with DS and we found out he was a boy we got lots of pitying looks from most of the people we told and comments like "don't worry, you can always try again for a girl". WTF are boys!? Practice babies!?

Similar to the above, I honestly don't mind whether this one is a boy or a girl so long as it sticks and is healthy but I would quite like another boy mainly because I'd like DS to have a brother close to his own age (he's 18 months atm) and I always had this idea of having two or three boys and then finishing it off with a little girl - not that any of us get to choose lol. When people ask and I tell them I get a look of horror like I've lost mind and am told "no! You want a girl!". Even worse is when they finish that sentence with "then you'll have one of each and you won't need to have any more".

@ cyclebump I'm with you on the horror stories. I don't get why some women (because it's always women) feel they have the right to scare the bejeesus out of all first timers. When I was pregnan with DS my SIL (who is a total witch along with MIL) was pregnant too. My MIL spent months telling us all how terrible labour is, blood everywhere, enemas, crippling agony, blah blah blah. She laughed at my plan to go drug free (I'm terrified of needles) and said I'd be crying for the epidural as soon as the pain started. When SIL had her baby the stories got worse because I then had then in stereo. She went 10 hours drug free and then had an epidural because she couldn't stand it any more because THAT'S HOW MUCH IT HURTS!!!!! (sorry for the caps but you could hear the capitals and exclamation marks when they were saying it). The staff at the hospital were amazed that anyone stood the pain for as long as ten hours and they were trying to plead with her to get an epidural after five hours for her own sake because that's how much it hurts. Staff from other wards and departments were popping by to see her afterwards because they couldn't believe anyone had gone so long without an epidural. Looking back on it now it's laughable but at the time it terrified me. My other SIL (on my side) is due any day now and when she asks about what its like I always make it a point to tell her the positives and that any hurt can be managed in many different ways and doesn't last forever. I don't want to be one of those scare mongers!

Oh the twins comments they do get tiring don't they?

I remember a Health Professional telling me that my morning sickness could be a psychological disorder.

I had severe morning sickness, it was very physical, thank you very much. I did think about vomiting over her shoes!

I do now ask people to clear their seats if I see a pregnant woman does not have a seat, in the situation that I am standing too.

Another thing. You have a momentary moan about all this craziness that is happening to your body and your single or male friends start harping about how 'children are blessings'. 'You shouldn't say anything negative as it will affect the baby' etc.

Its one of those rare times that I want to say - 'shut the F;;;k up!' (and I am not the cursing type. Smile

That felt kind of good to get that off my chest.

I used to work in a shop though, and one day we had a heavily pregnant lady come in and point out, quite politely, that perhaps the floor wasn't the best place for a stack of pregnancy books and would we consider moving them. Nobody who worked in the shop at the time had even been pregnant, so it just didn't cross our minds. So we thanked her for her input and moved them. No big deal and she didn't have to get upset over it.

people who practically stample you to clamber on the bus first - yes I'm talking about YOU fit healthy self obsessed 20 somethings with your head phones on. Take a breather and give a bump a little space please , perhaps even smile and say after you!!!

People parking SO close to my car door that I have to climb across the passenger side to get in - I have a bad back as well as being a mere 18 weeks, by the time I get into the driver's seat I'm probably not safe to drive anyway.

People taking about how short their labours were (mine was 70 hours first time).

My dad (a doctor in fairness so on the medical practical side) telling us we'd told them a bit early (8 weeks) with first child as stuff could probably go tits up (they didn't)

My DD waving wotsits under my nose. I'm over the morning sickness now - but that's a strong old smell and still too powerful for me in the mornings. (6pm and they're ALL I want to eat)

People inviting me to parties and serving up plate after plate of:

• Prawn vol au vents
• Brie
• Pate
• Parma ham
• Devilled eggs (not forbidden, just smells too strong)

Darling husband still having his wine in the evenings. Can't be too angry though, he went out at 10 last night to get me a Twix

Well let's see...

When I told work colleagues the news I had countless comments along the lines of "What do your parents think?" in an almost fearful way. I'm 25 years old! I'm a grown up! Why are you asking me if my parents are ok with it??

A male work colleague who refused to give me a seat (I hadn't actually asked for one) and went into a rant about how us women are built for pregnancy and shouldn't complain so much, no way was I having his seat. I hadn't complained!

The friend who said "I'm so sorry, gin and a hot bath will get rid of that" when I told her the news.

School kids on the bus swinging their rucksacks into me.

All of my friends telling me they'd been talking behind my back about how much weight I'd put on, but now they know I'm pregnant it's ok.

DP leaving his STINKY boots next to the bed when he knows they trigger my morning sickness.

Uneven pavements. Aargh, my hip!

My Doctor suggesting I may be an alcoholic by asking if I'd have difficulty not drinking now that I'm pregnant . Nope, not a problem ta.

People smoking right in front of my face, exhaling all over me. Gits.

Ok, rant over. Lots of nice things too , but no one seems to understand why any of those things would wind me up!

NarcolepsyQueen- "Weh-hey! Miss has been shagging!" Hilarious!

I just crept on to check how not to annoy pregnant ladies...

Comments and advice from men about childbirth. I'm not one for man bashing, I love men, but I wouldn't dream of offering them penis advice because I haven't got one so unless they're planning to push an 8pm watermelon out of their fun-bits then they've no frame of reference and really can't give me advice.

One of my brothers told me that women make too big a deal of labour, it blatantly doesn't hurt, and if a man was doing it he would be back at work the next day. He'll be seeing a delivery first hand in the very near future, I hope he tells SIL those comments when she's in the middle of her labour, then he'll learn what pain is when she embeds a gas and air pipe in his head ;)

A male friend told me that getting kicked in the nuts hurts more than having a baby because a women might decide to go through labour several times whereas a man never wants to be kicked in the nuts ever again, once is enough. I told him that no one offers you opiates or a spinal block for a kick in the nuts, he still not convinced.

My youngest brother, aged just 8 at the time, offered my labour advice when I was pregnant with DS. He told me to make sure to "push really, really, really hard because it's going to be like pooping out a twelve pound bowling ball make of crushed glass. You might die you know".