Being Stared At!!

[Spod]

Perhaps I'm paranoid.... but wherever I am people stare at me - I mean really stare... I know I have this huge bump but they stare like they've never seen a pregnant woman before!! and some of the looks aren't 'ah look...she's pregnant' ones... some people seem quite irritted to see me and my bump out and about!! I was in Fance last week... and the staring there was even worse.... started to think I was making a social faux pas by being out in public with my bump... anyone else get this?

Yep, pees me off no end. It's worse when they comment. If one more old codger tells me "ooh, not long now love" (err, yes it is actually, 13 weeks actually) I'll punch 'em.

No, I have to say I didn't. Maybe you are feeling extra self-conscious and noticing things more??

I did get wolf-whistled a couple of times while pregnant. Normally I hate it, but have to admit that I loved it when pregnant. Always black guys though (worked in Notting Hill) who were really positive about pregnant women unlike wimpy white co-workers!

I think you can't help noticing a very pregnant woman but I didn't mind that and assumed that all looks were positive ones. I felt fantastic when pregnant, and only felt fat at all once ds was born.

I just get chatted up by old ladies. I was in woolies the other day (38 wks) and this ancient biddy came up to me and said something or other along the lines of "you must be feeling the heat". I smiled and agreed and she said "is this your first?" and I said "no, my third" and she said "oh, well you still have your pretty face, your husband must be pleased". ???!!!!!! wasn't sure if he was meant to be pleased about my pretty face or the fact that he had fathered a third, so I just smiled inanely and said "yes, thank you" and she doddled off!

Its not that I dont feel terrific or self conscious about being heavily pregnant.. never have given a crap what other people think I look like... just find it mildly ammusing/sometimes irritating that people stare so much that they could walk into a lampost... in fact I wish i few of them would! it would give me a laugh in return. After the 20th or so person to stare at me in the space of 20 mins I am sorely tempted to whip up my dress and flesh them my bump in the flesh.... at least an eyeful of maternity knickers is actually something worth having a stare at!!! or feign labour and see just how interested they aare then!!!

well, I did get more highlights and got my cleavage out a bit. Maybe that helped me delude myself that the attention was good.

my boobs have exploded so much I darent attempt putting them on public view for fear of causing road traffic accident

wickedwaterwitch & princesspeahead: the worst thing about people making all those dumb irritating coments is that as a pregnant 'lady' you are 1) not supposed to snap back in a sarcastic manner by telling them to bog off and bother someone else or 2)no longer have the quick thinking witty brain you had before you got pregnant so can't come up with anything better than 'yeah ...' I've thought about getting a t-shirt made up saying 'I'm not pregnant, I ate all the pies'

I don't mind the biddies really - I think a lot of old ladies are just dying to make conversation with anyone and someone with an enormous pregnant stomach gives them an excuse to strike up conversation.
don't get hassled by anyone else, really. and certainly don't get wolf whistled! must just look friendly to biddies.... bit depressing, that!

Well at least you haven't got baby leftovers like me I went in a shop the other day and the shop assistant said ahh how long have you got left.how bad is that.I think pregnant women are beautifull and i bet thats what most people are thinking.

I have to admit I actually quite like it and will discuss my growing waistline with anyone who will listen!
As this is No.3 and almost definatley our last I'm savouring every bit of attention I get.

If any of you see a heavily pregnant woman chasing old biddies in the Wallington/Sutton area it's probably me just wanting a chat

Another thing - why do people suddenly think it is okay to touch you when you are pregnant? 'Feeling' your bump and cooing over you as if you are the baby. Would these people assume you didn't mind them feeling your tummy if you were not pregnant? Suddenly you are public property for some reason.

I remember when I was pregnant with my first, trying to plant things in dry ground, struggling to break up the ground. Someone leaned out of the window and said, 'Should you be doing that?' I replied, 'Do you want to do it for me then?' As you can guess, the window was closed quick smart.

I too hated it too when I was pg and people would start touching your bump. No asking or whatever - and it didn't matter how well they knew you either. Grrrrr

The answer the to; "Gosh, you're big!" is, "Gosh, you're rude." No thinking required - it became almost instinctive... (I was enormous!) Most people had the grace to look ashamed after that answer.

Nome - thank-you! At last I have something clever to say to all the thoughtless people who look at me in sheer horror when I tell them I actually have 15 weeks to go. Is being big a crime or something to be ashamed of? Feels like it sometimes

I must admit that I am a starer. I always stare at pregnant women, not out of horror but because I think they look sooo lovely. Not that I felt lovely when pregnant, I felt like crap actually!

So be pregnant and proud - people may be staring in wonderment and admiration!

Thanks for that Nome, I'm going to use it too. I don't mind people staring smiling or being nice, it's the constant comments about my size that do my head in and I'm not someone who's ever had any kind of eating disorder or even close to it. I can't imagine how much worse it must be if you have. Does anyone think that everyone (even women who've had kids) forget quite how big pregnancy makes you? For instance I have lovely friends telling me "oooh, that's a big baby there" and they've recently had children. Maybe people just forget? I think it was motherinferior who said she got comments too despite only putting on ONE STONE! So that proves to me it's nothing to do with actual size, people just think it's OK to say, Oh You're Big.

staring and smiling I meant.

havent noticed this really...im a bit worried that at 5 months i look how i did when 8 months with dd but mostly glad ive got over that 'im not fat just pregnant stage' and ive got my bump!

Luckily I'm quite small... but people still think I'm big.

I have adapted an old saying just incase...

If anyone says I'm Fat.... "Yes but your ugly, and in ** weeks I'll be slim"!!!

BR
PS I like the "You're rude" line

Touching your belly is so rude, can you imagine if you were not pregnant and someone camme up and did that it would almost be physical assault I think.

Think is worse when just pregnant or just given birth refused to go out after giving bitrh without DD just to make sure people knew I had a baby and was not just a lardy!! Would not even let anyone push pushchair (do you say push pushchair or just push chair??)

If you are anywhere in the City of London or North Kent area - I apologise - if he 6ft and dark haired is probably my DP. He would probably come up to you and tell you you were beautiful though - if you see him send him back to me and tell him I would not mind being pregnant!!

ha ha ha... love the 'you're rude' line ... may use it!!! don't like people touching bump either...what do they think they can feel anyway? And I love it when people say 'should you be doing that'.... like my dad... who hadn't visited us until I was 7 and a half months gone.... as I was about to lift a very light suitcase said 'dont do that sweatheart its not good for you'. I had to stop myself saying 'well where the hell have you been recently when I needed help with shopping trolleys, hoovering, carting the washing out, mowing the lawn etc etc.....' I have started to stare back at people who stare at me... especially the fat ones who dont have my excuse!! And I have noticed that some people get a bit peeved about me being 'in their way' ... just cos I'm the one with the large protrusion... I see it as them in my way frankly

Yes, www, it was me. Total strangers thought it was OK to comment, and indeed if I said loudly and not particularly politely that it was only a stone they'd remark 'oh, so it's all on your belly then'; and friends would email saying they'd heard on the grapevine how enormous I'd become and how the baby was obviously due to be a whopper. Drove me banananas.

Funny, that has become really noticeable to me this pregnancy as well, people staring at my tummy and then when they look up and catch my eye, they just then look away without a smile, or sometimes even carry on staring unsmiling.
I find that so irritating and rude! At least if they smiled it would make it look as if they were thinking pleasant thoughts about me!

I must admit, when someone touches my tummy without prior permission I have to restrain myself from tweeking their nipples!! Well, lets see how they like it!

I hated it when people touched me when I was pregnant with DD and was tempted to grab something painful on them just to show how invasive they were being - of course I didn't though. Love the being rude comment. For those of you who have been stared at - sorry, I often find myself staring at pregnant ladies as I think it is so amazing what we go through and then I smile when I think about the cuddles they are going to get when the baby arrives.