Painful perineum! (TMI alert)

[lurcherlover]

I'm 40 weeks today (come on baby!) and have tried perineal massage a couple of times. However I found it really painful - the stretching sensation was too intense - so I stopped doing it. Last night me and DH had our first bedroom fun for 3 months (I had some bleeding in July, caused by an erosion and although the docs didn't say not to do it, they did say if we did it would probably start the bleeding again and I'd have to go back to the antenatal assessment unit to be checked, so we decided to abstain for a while!) - and it was agony, again in my perineum. It felt like it was being stretched too much and I think it actually tore a little bit. This is scaring me now - it's like I've shrunk somehow! And it's bothering me for two reasons - one is I'm assuming this means the baby crowning is going to REALLY hurt, and also I'm worried that post-birth sex is going to keep hurting. Any advice please??

From what i recall, you will feel like it is shrunk somehow - perineum very very swollen and distended at term from general pg water retention and then all the pressure in the area from baby getting lower. hence any activity in area easily -> soreness from stretching. i'd leave it be, no more perineal massage, though it might ease any stretching feeling to gently apply massage oil at this stage. from memories of crowning, it's really intense regardless, and while you'll feel the old ring of fire you should have either so much going on from hormones and adrenaline, or pain relief, that this will be entirely do-able. i tore both times, not much, couldn't feel the actual tear, just the relief of the crowning being finished.

I think it'll be fine after the birth, once the baby is delivered the swelling gets going. i healed fine and fast from my two tears each time. good luck