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Potty training

Is your child ready for potty training at nursery? Here's the place for all your toilet training questions.

2y old boy, in slow potty training since 8 months, how to officially train?

82 replies

boyohboymama · 23/09/2020 20:55

My boy just turned 2 years old. We have a bit of a unique situation with potty training I think because we've been doing it for almost a year and a half!
We first introduced him to the potty at around 8 months old and we all thought it was amazing that he would poop and pee pretty much every time we put him on the potty...We still kept him in a diaper for the remainder of the time. Currently convincing him that he has to go sit on the potty is getting harder as he is havingtypical "terrible 2s" temper tantrums and refusing to comply. He has never officially told us that he needs to use the potty but if you can convince him to sit he will usually go.

We have tried to officially get rid of diapers the last few months but he is not understanding that when he feels full he must go to the potty - he will just pee in his pants or even on the floor if you leave him naked, at which point he tells us that he has peed and we clean it up.

I am looking for advice as to how to move to the next step - to have him understand when he needs to pee before he pees. How do you teach this? Does it come on its own? Should we forget about the potty all together for a while and then reintroduce it at a later time again?

I feel like because "potty training" has been dragging for so long he will have a harder time actually being potty trained than a regular boy who is following a more traditional quick potty training process. Help?

OP posts:
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Trailing1 · 23/09/2020 20:59

Please dont take the following offensive as it's meant kindly, but 8 months is very young to start potty training. This is why it's taking so much time with little success. Maybe try when he is abit older like 2.5 years or a bit later?

OverTheRainbow88 · 23/09/2020 21:00

If he’s peeing himself regularly and at his age I would conclude that he isn’t ready and wait a few
Months

toomanyspiderplants · 23/09/2020 21:00

Why did you start so early?

shesgonebatshitagain · 23/09/2020 21:01

Lay off it and let him show you his own cues instead of what you think

zaphodbeeble · 23/09/2020 21:02

He’s too young

molifly14 · 23/09/2020 21:02

Stop and start again in a few months, he clearly isn't ready

SardineJam · 23/09/2020 21:03

Agree with shesgonebatshitagain no need to rush anything, my boys were nearer 3 when they were ready

ScarMatty · 23/09/2020 21:05

It's quite simple really... you stop.

He isn't ready.

Try again in a few months.

N4ish · 23/09/2020 21:05

So much pressure on him! What’s the hurry?

AfterSchoolWorry · 23/09/2020 21:08

Too soon.

Ohalrightthen · 23/09/2020 21:11

Sounds like he's not ready yet. Little kids (and boys especially) often wee reflexively when you take their nappies off, it's something to do with the cold air, and if you're bending his legs up into a squatting position to put him on the potty, that's just going to make him more likely to pee/poo. You haven't been potty training him, youve just been making him go on the potty. It sounds like he's not ready, so pushing it will just distress him. Leave it for a few months.

BlueGreyGreens · 23/09/2020 21:17

In my experience they pretty much potty train themselves when they are ready. Forget it for a while and save yourself a load of stress.

ineedaholidaynow · 23/09/2020 21:17

Why did you start so early? Also he probably hasn't realised what he is meant to do as you have been giving him mixed messages since 8 months, either you use a potty or you use nappies, you don't do both for so long.

Coriandersucks · 23/09/2020 21:19

This has made me feel quite sad. The pressure you’re putting on not only him but yourselves is unrealistic. Why are you in such a rush?

harper30 · 23/09/2020 21:24

Hi OP, I'm in a very similar situation with DD who turned 2 in July. We've had a potty around since she was about 1 and I leaned cues of when she needed a poo pretty early on, so she's been pooing on a potty for over a year, at first due to me just catching her at the right time (she certainly wasn't potty trained then) and now it has progressed to her telling us she needs a poo. I can't remember cleaning a pooey nappy for a long long time, probably for 6 months or more. But wees are a complete enigma and I've not really attempted to 'train' her to use a potty for wees yet as she's not ready, and like your son, can only really tell me after she's done one.
So I'm planning to just carry on with what works, sit on the potty or the toilet when she needs a poo, and the occasional time she says she needs a wee, the rest of the time in a nappy and as she is ready to use the potty/toilet more regularly for wees I'm just going to go at her pace, she seems to be getting there on her own really and asking to use it more often of her own accord.
I definitely read somewhere that you shouldnt push the issue or make it a negative thing, always having to sit on it etc, so I wouldn't stress out about it too much yet, he's still very young Smile

Iwantcreamcakesformydinner · 23/09/2020 21:26

Just leave the potty in sight and let him do it when he's ready

iloveautumn3 · 23/09/2020 21:26

My son is 3 and we are potty training he wasn't ready until now.

harper30 · 23/09/2020 21:26

That said, if you are trying really hard to crack on with training for whatever reason, a friend of mine's little boy is about 2 months older than my DD and he has been out of nappies for a little while now, they had great success with a couple of books I think, one the parents read and one made for toddlers. I can find out what it was called if that would be helpful Smile

CarrotPuff · 23/09/2020 21:41

Ignore everyone who's saying it's too early. Majority if people on here don't know anything about infant toileting.

Looks like he's made some great progress. I really wouldn't rush with taking nappies away. Just try to get him to use potty as regularly as you can and eventually you'll notice he's pretty much dry all day. You can try putting him in loose joggers without pants on, sometimes it works. But if it doesn't just take a step back.

CarrotPuff · 23/09/2020 21:42

Ignore everyone who's saying it's too early. Majority if people on here don't know anything about infant toileting.

Looks like he's made some great progress. I really wouldn't rush with taking nappies away. Just try to get him to use potty as regularly as you can and eventually you'll notice he's pretty much dry all day. You can try putting him in loose joggers without pants on, sometimes it works. But if it doesn't just take a step back.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 23/09/2020 21:44

Completely disagree with the posters saying leave the nappies on and the potty there- mixed messages are confusing for young children. I think it’s been detrimental to start so young. I personally favour just a straight forward “done with nappies” approach, very matter of fact between 2-2.5yrs old. Oh crap method is a game changer imo

treetopss · 23/09/2020 21:44

If you wait until they're ready it's so much easier. Mine rarely had any accidents after starting potty training because I didn't rush things. Surely better for both parents and the child to not have to be constantly on edge about accidents etc. due to rushing the process.

angelopal · 23/09/2020 21:49

Wait until he is ready. With both ours we did it a week before they turned 3 and took 3 days. It wasn't planned that way. With DD we tried a couple of times and she wasn't ready. With DD it just worked out the best time to try.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 23/09/2020 21:49

Btw “ready” I went by was, dry during naps, able to speak/ communication and pull down their own knickers

RealityExistsInTheHumanMind · 23/09/2020 21:58

At 8 months it is you that is 'trained' not him.

If he has never told you, then he has never been remotely trained. There may be a an elimination reaction to a cold potty or a squatting position but it is in no way training.

I would put him fully back in nappies for a few months at least. This time of year, maybe leave him until the spring before you try again. Praise him when he tells you he has had a wee or a poo and you just may get him telling you before he does, if and when this happens, then he is definitely ready.

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