I am being stupid - what is the objective of potty training?

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

OK obviously I know what the final objective is but I'm not really understanding the goals in the short term.

I've read 'oh crap' (sleepily during night feeds with the baby, so I might have missed the important bits), we are on day 2. First day DS mix of accidents and on potty.

So self-initiation (recognising they need to go and doing something about it?) tends to come later.

And in the mean time - am I just trying to offer the potty often enough and/or spot signs he wants to go to avoid the accidents?

I mean I could just offer the potty very frequently and I don't think we'd have any accidents, but is that the point? What am I actually trying to teach him to do?

Sorry I am sleep deprived and foggy headed and just not really understanding it!

You're not trying to offer the potty frequently (although it's really hard to stop yourself in the early days!). You're wanting them to link the feeling of needing to go for a wee with moving towards the potty. So at first, that means watching like a hawk for the sign they're about to wee, or if they start, picking them up and moving them telling them to hold it until they're on the potty.

Does that make sense?

I really questioned myself at the end of day 1 and then again at the end of day 2, but day 3 was brilliant! I did it with a new baby too, it's tough. But honestly I so prefer only having one nappy to change. It made life a lot easier for me.

That makes sense - the book is a bit ambiguous about how often you prompt them to sit on the potty unless they are actually just about to pee.

We are on day three, still bare bottom but DS is (mostly) telling me when he needs to wee or taking himself to the potty. Just as well as I am failing at the watching like a hawk thing and I have totally missed the few accidents he has had until he tells me.

Presumably we still want to prompt sometimes,to get them in the habit of going e.g. before leaving house?

How do they get used to holding it when needed - is that just something that comes over time?

It sounds like he's doing brilliantly!

Definitely prompt at key points - leaving the house, just got in, before nap/lunch/tea etc. These are the kind of times they would be prompted at nursery or school in the future so that's ok. Otherwise try not to overprompt otherwise they don't get that feeling of needing to go.

Holding it definitely comes as they get more control over their bladder. Holding it for a few extra minutes so you can find a toilet should come in the first few weeks. Holding it overnight for example would take longer (although DD was doing that a few months after being trained in the day so it needn't take really long time).