Still pooing in nappy at 4 - starting school arghhh

[survivingsummer]

DD has never done a poo directly into the toilet or potty. She will sit on the toilet with a nappy on but refuses to take it off. I have literally tried everything but she refuses point blank. She is still wearing nappies at night so waits till she gets her night time one on and poos in it at bedtime.

Has anyone else had a child starting school who only pooed in a nappy? Did they grow out of it sharpish due to peer pressure? Should I seek professional help for her?

Hi, my DD's toileting situation is almost identical and she will be starting school this September. Although she doesn't have a nappy at night and we did actually have one poo in a potty once (Xmas Day 2009!)

DP and I sought professional advice (GP, health visitor etc) and, even though it hasn't made much practical difference, I found it very useful. First of all, they were able to suggest a few things to promote her independence when pooing - even if she is using a nappy - that we hadn't thought of.

Second, I feel more confident knowing that we have professional "back-up" so to speak. We feel that we need to let school know (DD has never needed a poo at nursery but the school day is so much longer) and I feel better being able to say that we, and others, have been trying to help DD with this for some time.

Furthermore, if time ticks by and DD needs more serious help, I feel that DD is already in the system.

Out of interest have you tried cutting a hole in your DD's nappy? This is often the next stage for children that will poo on the toilet but only in a nappy. We tried this with our DD but she hated the feeling of the fluff from the inside of the nappy against her skin. Perhaps your DD wouldn't mind?

Just thought I'd mention that DD's health visitor told us that starting school often resolves toilet-training issues and that she has seen lots of children make huge progress in their first term.

Fingers tightly crossed here!

Thanks don'tforget2scream - good to know we are not alone with this!

Did they suggest any reasons for it when you sought advice? It really confuses me as dd is so independent in other ways. I did try cutting a hole in the nappy but she got really upset and I was worried about making it worse. Recently I have just let her get on with pooing in a nappy and not tried anything else hoping that if she isn't stressed she'll just do it of her own accord

I really hope your HV is right about the issue resolving with starting school. DD is very good at holding onto her poo but at the moment I can't imagine what would happen if she needed to go whilst at school!