Can't cope with baby's constant screaming

[Flatwhite32]

I love my six week old DD so much, but for the last 2 weeks she has screamed pretty much constantly and I'm on the verge of a breakdown over it. She barely sleeps during the day so is very overtired, and I don't know how to improve this. I have tried everything, including buying 2 books and trying their suggestions, but absolutely nothing is working. I'm convinced she has reflux as she has every symptom of it, so I'll speak to the GP about that at her 6 week check this week. Was prescribed infant Gaviscon a few weeks ago, but it hasn't worked. The evenings are the worst. We get 5 hours of non stop screaming every night, and she won't sleep before 11pm. Thankfully her sleep during the night isn't too bad, possibly because she's so tired from screaming and not sleeping. I'm breastfeeding her and expressing, and she has recently started being really fussy during feeds. She was such a placid baby when we brought her home and fed really well, but she has completely changed recently. She is currently screaming the place down and DH and I are at a complete loss as to what to do. She has been fed, she's clean, her nappy is clean, and her environment is calm. She sounds so so upset and I can't bear it any more.

I’m on my second refluxer and it is hell earth. Try gaviscone as well as ranitidine to help her feeding. A good infant probiotic might help too. An never lay her down flat, always on an incline. You might find that after initial relief with tantiadine you might have to move on to omeprazole.
I have a babybjorn bouncer and a mamaruka sling which has saved me and stoped my weight loss somewhat as I now occasionally have hands free to eat.
I’m also on sertraline to help me cope, drink shedloads of coffee (and wine) and just tick of the weeks until this hell passes really.
Nothing and I mean nothing is as bad as these first few weeks. Teething, ear infections, chickenpox, all a walk in the park in comparison. Hang in there.

Glad you got the ranitidine and hope it works for you. If you're not making progress however please consider the possibility of it being a milk intolerance. Even if you just try two weeks dairy free

It is a struggle without dairy but I used to eat entire packets of Maryland cookies in one sitting followed by sharer sized Galaxy bars and I'm just about coping. Bourbons, Oreos, Hobnobs, Betty Crocker cake mixes, most dark chocolate etc. are all dairy free! My main struggle has been cheese and milk for my cereal as all alternatives are shitty.

Thanks everyone. We had a few days reprieve from the screaming, but it started again last night and is continuing today. She had terrible wind yesterday (we use gripe water but it seems to have stopped working) and her baby acne is getting worse (it's now on her ears and neck). She rubs her face nearly constantly, which is making it worse. We have to have scratch mitts on her most of the time because of this. She won't be swaddled, so unless we hold down her arms, we can't do much about it. I am going 100% dairy free as of today to see if that helps. She's just so uncomfortable everywhere and I feel so hopeless.

Definitely look into CMPA. Unfortunately you may have to cut dairy out. If you need help, the CMPA Breastfeeding Support Facebook group is helpful (primarily in telling you what chocolate you can eat!!)

Take a look at scratch sleeves to help stop damage from scratching, the ends are covered in silk.

Please cut out dairy - it can take up to 6 weeks to clear your system but I saw an improvement within 48 hours

Love to dream swaddles helped my refluxy baby. It meant I could hold her upright without her wriggling and scrabbling on me. They cover her hands too so prevent scratching. Good luck, you aren't alone.

Any update OP? Hope you’ve had some improvement!

Her reflux has improved, but she has awful skin which she won't stop scratching, and very watery nappies. It's hell as I have to watch her 24/7 to stop her scratching. She has mitts on, but the scratching is still massively aggravating it. The cream for the GP hasn't made a difference at all. I've given up dairy but it hasn't made a difference so far. If anything her skin has worsened.

Have you tried cutting out soya as well? 50% of cmpa babies are also allergic to soya as the make up of the protein is almost identical. I am dairy & soya free so understand that this is hard! :(

No I haven't @Cleo2628. The weight is falling off me as it is (now less than 8 stone). What a nightmare. Am tempted to stop BF'ing.

That rash is awful. Have you been back to the GP since? It is perfectly possible that it's soya too. I had this thought when mine's symptoms didn't massively improve and always said I would give up breastfeeding before cutting out everything as I have also lost a load of weight. My GP has given me Similac to combifeed but my daughter won't take a bottle. I'm 4 weeks dairy free now and it has definitely made a difference, although she still fucking hates the car seat.

My DS has colic/reflux best thing I did was wear a stretchy wrap with him in. He slept during the day upright. Did get covered in lots of sick though. We also used carobel to thicken the milk and help it stay down.

It will pass - it doesn't feel like it but it will! X

Yes we went back today @WTFdidwedo. Been prescribed a 0.5% steroid cream and a cream called Aveeno. Can't get them til tomorrow though as the pharmacy had shut by the time the appointment was over. I've only been 100% dairy free for a few days, but there has been no difference. It has got worse and worse. I'm so upset about it all. I feel so lonely and isolated too. I haven't been to any of the groups I had planned to go to this week because of this. Poor girl just looks so awful and is so itchy.

It is hard but so worth it if you see an improvement in your baby. Join the cmpa breastfeeding support page on Facebook people always post dairy and soya free treats on there :) for example - own brand Bourbon biscuits, coconut collaborative choc pots, sainsburys free from ice cream etc etc

I'm so sorry to hear there hasn't been an improvement. My daughter is 21 weeks now and this is the first time she hasn't screamed all day and night since the first week she was born. I would really insist on them providing you with allergy milk should it appear to be the case however.

I completely understand how you feel, my GP abd Health Visitor have actually referred me onto a PND course because my daughter's issues have affected me so much..! Do you have any PND type groups you could attend to just get a cup of coffee out of the house and listen to other people? I've found just sitting in a room full of other people moaning has made me feel a lot better already.

Sorry to hear of the reflux hell Flatwhite. My first DC also had this. How is breastfeeding? Any issues with fast letdown, oversupply, clicking, sore nipples etc? Do you have any breastfeeding groups locally? Are you feeding loads - reflux babies seem to like comfort sucking but this can make things more pukey. Is it possible to space out feeds?

I hope you are ok this too shall pass.

@GreyCloudsToday thankfully her reflux has improved with the ranitidine. It's her skin making her (and me) miserable.

she won't sleep before 11pm

Totally normal.

All natural ingredients so nothing that can do any harm.

Poisonous mushrooms are natural......

I had a reflux and eczema firstborn. Second just a screamer!
I wore her in a sling a lot.
There is a peak crying phase around now. It might feel like forever, but things did improve gradually from now on.
Gripe water was good.

The screaming isn't too bad now. What is bad is I'm getting extremely isolated as she quite literally won't stop scratching her face, so we are stuck at home while I try my best to stop her scratching. I haven't had any company all week apart from DH, and he's at work during the day. Our families don't live nearby. I've been taking her for a walk to get fresh air, but that's it. The minute she's out the car seat on the buggy, she scratches. It's a nightmare, and nobody (including 2 doctors) knows why it has suddenly developed out of nowhere.

I would strap socks to her hands and keep going out. She might be more distracted. You need it also.

I had awful eczema as a baby, all photos are of me with socks on my hands! Definitely don't stop going out, you'll lose what's left of your sanity!

Cover her with aveeno (you can get in skincare aisle in supermarket, it's not prescription) cut and file her nails as short as possible, stick socks on her hands and go.

She will get a decent scratch in sometimes. If it helps, I'm 27 and still an awful scratcher (in my sleep, when I'm not paying attention etc) but I have no scars and aveeno often stops the itching so I stop scratching for a bit.

Hi, my baby cried a lot at a similar age to yours, she's 12 weeks now and the last few weeks has been miles better. I had to stop breastfeeding because I had awful pain from it - Drs just said it was shape of her mouth or something and nothing could be done to improve it - and once I was giving her like 3 bottles of formula a day she would get distressed and refuse the breast, so I only EBF for 6 weeks and then mixed fed for a further 6, she will be having the last bottle of expressed breast milk tomorrow for one feed which I am sad about but ah well. I really resonated with your comment earlier in the thread about feeling like your milk is poisoning your baby, my family put so much pressure on me to stop BF as they were convinced that was why DD screamed a lot, but she always put weight on really well - she never lost weight at her first weigh-in she had surpassed her birth weight - so it wasn't that. But you are doing an amazing thing by BF your baby and if that part of things is going well then continue!

I'm glad to hear the medication seems to be helping and that she's not crying as much, I know what you mean about feeling isolated, I still struggle to get out much with DD, she's much better than she was but still cries quite a lot which sometimes still includes the full throttle screaming the place down thing which makes me embarrassed to take her out, luckily DH is not bothered and will walk her in the pram or Baby Bjorn if we can't get her to calm down otherwise and she always falls asleep eventually with help of dummy.

I'd agree to keep trying with the dummy, it has been a lifesaver for our sanity!!

With the scratching I can't help, maybe baby has eczema? I have eczema and get it on my face somtimes. I guess only GP can help with that although to keep her from actually scratching can you keep scratch mitts on her all the time? Or those sleepsuits with integrated scratch mitts, or socks on her hands. DD Is 12 weeks and I still have scratch mitts on her or whatever if she's sleeping or if she's in the pram because we keep her nails short but she still pokes herself in the eye sometimes and stuff or scratches herself.

I forgot to say, what actually seems to have helped DD is Infacol but I think you already tried that. Once we started to give it regularly we saw a very big improvement and twice we've sort of fallen off the wagon with it and both times she's got very screamy and unhappy again, so I think she struggles with her wind. We tried Gripe Water first but it actually made her worse - my dad is a Dr and said for some people/babies, gripe water can make pain worse as it causes contractions in the intestines I think or something, and if it causes them to contract too much or too intensly this in itself can cause pain. If you've been giving her gripe water regularly for awhile and she's still crying a lot I would consider having a week off it and seeing if she is any better, I mean you may as well if she's crying anyway.