Can't cope with baby's constant screaming

[Flatwhite32]

I love my six week old DD so much, but for the last 2 weeks she has screamed pretty much constantly and I'm on the verge of a breakdown over it. She barely sleeps during the day so is very overtired, and I don't know how to improve this. I have tried everything, including buying 2 books and trying their suggestions, but absolutely nothing is working. I'm convinced she has reflux as she has every symptom of it, so I'll speak to the GP about that at her 6 week check this week. Was prescribed infant Gaviscon a few weeks ago, but it hasn't worked. The evenings are the worst. We get 5 hours of non stop screaming every night, and she won't sleep before 11pm. Thankfully her sleep during the night isn't too bad, possibly because she's so tired from screaming and not sleeping. I'm breastfeeding her and expressing, and she has recently started being really fussy during feeds. She was such a placid baby when we brought her home and fed really well, but she has completely changed recently. She is currently screaming the place down and DH and I are at a complete loss as to what to do. She has been fed, she's clean, her nappy is clean, and her environment is calm. She sounds so so upset and I can't bear it any more.

My now 7 month old was exactly like this...constantly crying for no obvious reason. She's my second so I knew that it wasn't normal and also that my parenting technique hasn't changed that much! She was EBF and I felt like it I wasn't feeding her she was crying.

In the end it was silent reflux, we tried everything Colief, Infacol,Gaviscon The only thing that worked was ranitidine, which worked (after a few days (I think it needs to build up)) she stayed on it until I started to wean her at 6 months.

It's an awful time, but you'll get through it, hopefully sooner rather than later

Thank you SO much everyone! Such helpful responses.
@Anotherdayanotherdollar I assume she has, as it has never been mentioned by anyone.
@avocadoincident I've been researching cranial osteopathy this evening! If I get no joy from her GP appointment, I'll definitely consider it.
@Tetri she used to accept the dummy, but spits it out every time now. We are persevering, but she just doesn't seem to want it.
@BifsWif great idea re videoing. Thank you.
That's when they really try and make you lose the fucking plot @pastabest you're absolutely right here. I'm mentally exhausted from it all.

Yes we do have a sling, but I have a coccyx injury from childbirth, and wearing her in the sling really aggravates it, so I'm probably not wearing it as much as I should. It didn't work tonight either with the screaming, as she was getting very hot and sweaty in it which I think was fuelling her agitation.

@RLOU30 we have been using Colief religiously, but it hasn't worked unfortunately. I've spent a fortune on it!

@25MINTY I'll try and get some carobel tomorrow. I'm willing to try anything.

@Quodlibet I'm trying to cut back on dairy, but I'm losing a lot of weight as a result, and I can't afford to lose any more (I know, I shouldn't complain!). Will speak to my GP about this at the 6 week appointment.

She finally calmed down, but now I'm dreading waking her for her dream feed, as I know it'll all start again.

Don't wake her for a dream feed, she'll wake up by herself when she needs you.

@Cyw2018 Good idea. I've decided against it! She just looks exhausted, and I can't bear to wake her up now.

It could be CMPA (cow's milk protein allergy). There's a Facebook support group, lots of babies have this combined with (silent) reflux. She'd need prescribed amino acid based milk or if your bfing you to cut all dairy out.

If you're breastfeeding try cutting out dairy from your diet, baby could possibly have a CMPA.
This sounds exactly like my son and I had no sleep for 9 weeks and I had a 13 month old as well at the time.
It very nearly drove me to suicide and not one dr helped me until I demanded that I see a paediatrician.
Please think about cutting all dairy foods out for a few days and see if it improves.
My son is 3 now and drinks 16 oz of milk a day so he's no longer allergic.

Re CMPA it can take several weeks to improve as dairy takes a while to get out of yours and theb baby's system. And you'd need to cut ALL dairy (check ingredients for everything you'd be surprised the amount of things that contain dairy)

Our DD wasn’t sleeping and was crying the place down too OP. It is very very tough, I feel for you.

We worked out that she’s really light sensitive so I would often put her in one of the big stretchy wrap slings and she would burrow into the darkness and fall asleep (she will only sleep on me). We also put her sun hat on her and that helps to block out the light.

Lots of singing and rocking/bouncing to songs I listened to when I was pregnant with her.

If she has reflux she won’t want to be put down on her back i’m afraid :(

DD cosleeps with me and sleeps on her side with her head on my breast.

Good luck, I really feel for you.

Lots of good suggestions for the baby. But... you need to look after yourself now so you don't get any weaker or more tired.

A couple I know had this so badly from DC1 they both had to take time off work after a couple of months, and the GP told the inlaws to take the baby off them for a week so they could get some sleep. Prioritise your own health once the baby is fed and safe - that's not a joke.

Reflux babies specialize in treating you to the bloodcurdling shrieks of a dying animal. Don't worry, she's fine. Heartburn is uncomfortable but harmless. DD will still be fine when you go out.

Take turns with DH to leave the house so you each get a break of at least an hour each every evening. Without the baby, that's vital.

It passes, but the main risk is to your wellbeing, not the baby's, usually, so look after yourself.

Also do you have a black out blind? We didn’t until about three weeks ago and change in DD is remarkable

Are you breastfeeding? If so please please try cutting all dairy & soya out of your diet!! This was my baby and when I cut out diary & soya she was like a new baby. Which confirmed cows milk allergy (50% are also allergic to soya). It’s worth a try x

I am breastfeeding. Interestingly as the screaming has got worse (noticeably over the past few days) she has developed a rash on her face which is getting worse. I assumed it was baby acne, but she had lovely skin until now, and I always thought baby acne developed earlier than 6 weeks. Just had a look at her little face now and the rash is now on both sides. Her skin looks so spotty.

I am worried about losing even more weight on no dairy (which I have been doing the past few days, and absolutely hating. Could barely eat a thing at my in laws the other day as practically everything had dairy in it). I know I shouldn't complain, but I was nearly 10st at full term, and now I'm nearly below 8st just six weeks later. I am definitely eating less with the no dairy, as I'm not experienced with it at all.

I was going to say sounds like my dc who ended up with a milk allergy. You do lose weight fast but you eventually do figure out what you can eat.

If you're worried about your weight the only thing to try is dairy free formula from the gp. You're in a catch 22 there.

How did you get on today @Flatwhite32 ?

Hi @avocadoincident thank you for asking. Her appointment isn't til late afternoon. She isn't very happy today when awake, and just the usual unsettled and writhing around after feeds. She has started only feeding for ten minutes now, and is rejecting bottles of expressed milk, despite taking them eagerly before. Both cheeks have a bumpy rash on them too. I feel like I'm trapped in the house all alone (we have no family nearby). I'm a teacher and school goes back tomorrow. I love my girl dearly, but sometimes wish I was going back to work too, as it's infinitely easier than this. She was so happy, chilled and feeding brilliantly when we brought her home. I don't know what has happened.

My daughter is the same. I'm so sorry to tell you this but she is 19 weeks and still like it. I really believed everyone that she would get better at 8, then 12, then 16 weeks but she just hasn't. She was on ranitidine as I breastfed. It made no difference. She wouldn't be swaddled, hated white noise, hated lying down, loathed the car seat, hated the pram, hated being held in the crook of my arm etc.

Last week I finally broke down to my GP and health visitor after I showed them multiple videos of her in seeming agony. I cut dairy out two weeks ago and saw a slight improvement so they've agreed to give her Similac. I'm a bit sad as my dairy free diet still hasn't cured her so I'm weaning her slowly to dairy free formula this week. My family have made me feel a bit shit implying that I should've just put her on formula from day one.

So yes, you are not alone. I have sat sobbing on my doorstep too many nights to continue feeding her when she doesn't seem to want me to. I hope your situation is more positive than mine!

It's an absolute killer when your baby just screams and screams, DD was like this with undiagnosed food allergies and silent reflux, it nearly broke our marriage and our sanity. You have my complete sympathy.

Do show the GP a video of the difficult feeds, and be prepared not to be polite but firm and not be brushed off. Lots of parents with a baby with silent reflux and/or CMPA struggle to convince a GP it's not just usual baby crying. There are Facebook support groups for reflux and also CMPA that might be useful for you to join. The CMPA group has a sister group called CMPA Support for Breastfeeding which is a great help.

Hope it went well today. I'm a teacher too and felt a little twinge of sadness that I wasn't there to meet the new pupils but a huge relief too that I didn't have the stress. I'm in South Wales if you are near. 🌸

Haven’t read the whole thread so not sure if this has been suggested but have you thought about seeing a Cranial Osteopath? I have an 8 week old and was experiencing the same thing. We went to see one on Friday and since then (touch wood!) have seen a massive improvement!

It’s all very technical but can really help especially if your baby had a forceps/ traumatic birth.

I meant to add, I saw a cranial osteopath three times and convinced myself it was working but it didn't for mine unfortunately. I'm also in south Wales @avocadoincident waves

@WTFdidwedo I'm in Chepstow. ❤️

I don't have much to add but both my babies have had reflux and I remember those early days of pukey hell well. All I wanted you to know is that while it is tough, it does come to an end and years later is a distant memory. I started to enjoy both of mine after they turned 1 and it all started to settle down. The right treatment makes a huge difference so do not let the doctors fob you off!

the GP told the inlaws to take the baby off them for a week

Go back to the Drs if you think it's reflux. Gaviscon did nothing so ds2. Ranitidine worked miracles

Hi again everyone. She had her 6 week check yesterday (typically she smiled and was extremely endearing the whole way through!) but the GP was excellent. She really listened to me, and we came away with a prescription for ranitidine. She's still quite fussy this morning, but I'm not expecting it to work instantly.