Post natal insomnia

[Luckystar1]

My 2nd DC is now 18 weeks old. She is the light of my life and I am completely besotted by her, but... sleep is a major issue.

She has had weeks of waking up hourly/2 hourly, but we have dealt with that and her sleep is not too bad now.

The problem is me. I can't sleep.

She goes to bed at 7ish, I usually go at 9. She often wakes at around 10.30/11.30, it can be a squeak or full on screaming. I am then wide wake, often for hours, waiting on her to wake again.

I am broken and struggling with the extreme lack of sleep.

She is ebf, but I've just bought formula as I need my DH to do a night feed, so at least the entire responsibility isn't mine.

We also have a 25 month old. He was ebf for 16 months so I'm feeling terrible about giving the baby formula, but I'm wading through mud on a daily basis and I need more sleep.

Can anyone give me any stories of their experiences please??

Poor you. Sending virtual hugs. I have experienced insomnia in similar situations and it is really really hard.
Don't feel bad if mixed feeding is what helps you to cope. You have got to do what is best for the family and that includes you! Also, practical things are never going to be the same for the second child - I totally understand your desire to keep things as similar as possible but it's ok to do some things differently if that works better for them or for the family.
I wish I had brilliant story about how I made my insomnia better but unfortunately I got myself in such a state that I was barely sleeping at all and had to go to the doctor and try a very low dose of antidepressants (there is at least one type that you can take while breastfeeding). These calmed me down enough to cope with this situation a bit better. And now our children are slightly older so night wakings are much less frequent and I find it all more manageable.
Sending hugs.

Poor you, lack of sleep is awful isn't it. What does your DH think? Are you feeling anxious in other ways too?

You poor thing. I have got this again with my second child. It's awful isn't it.

I had CBT first time round, which was good. Helped me to work out and rationalise why I wasn't sleeping and in turn took the edge of some of my anxiety. Worth a try.

I have also used Bach Remedies Night and This Works Pillow Spray (both of which you can use if BFing apparently.

Both of these work to varying extents - not sure if they actually work or if they are a placebo that I believe works, but whatever!

Melatonin and Nytol one a night are sure fire ways to help sleep but not sure about the implications while breastfeeding.

Insomnia can be related to PND/anxiety so it's worth going to your gp to see about a low level AD as the PP said.

It doesn't last forever. Good luck.

Magnesium tablets are great for sleep. Try those and the pillow spray.
But as PP's have said, it can be a symptom of post natal anxiety or depression so keep an eye on how you're feeling overall.
Best of luck and congratulations on your new arrival

Thank you all, apologies for the late return.

We have made a few adjustments and sleep has improved a bit. I've started a little evening routine, foot soak in Epsom Salts for magnesium, 10 mins of mindfulness, lavender on the pillow, a slightly later bedtime and a tray on the landing with everything to prepare a bottle for DH to give her if I can't sleep (psychological for me to know there's 'back up'!)

All has helped massively.

I have made an appointment with the doctor too. I do feel down and anxious occasionally it that's (I truly feel) as a consequence of the sleep, rather than vice versa).

Thankfully I am completely and utterly besotted by DD so I know for certain there are no bond issues.

I suppose I'm also entering the 'twilight' months... sleep still crap, but no longer a novelty, increasing stories of how well other's babies are sleeping, baby is more alert but still totally reliant.

I also find it hard to accept that we have absolutely no family support whatsoever, it's just DH and I, and we never get time alone together to reestablish 'us'.

But she'all start weaning soon and hopefully things will improve further then.

I think I also find it hard that DS is only 20 months older, and a real handful and I just envisage the next 2 years being more of the same (he has to have an extremely strict routine or he is completely unmanageable) and I just find it so restrictive and a little depressing!

Hello!

So glad to see things are looking better for you but I just wanted to reply anyway.

I feel I literally could have written your post myself, I have struggled massively with insomnia the last month or so and it has
Made me so ill. I absolutely feel for you so much.

I seriously thought I was getting PPD and I've had some horrid anxiety and dark days but honestly, once I slept a bit it did lift. Please do talk to your doc about this if you haven't already as it really does get better the more support you have.

I found nytol helped to relax me and I did have a very short course of sleeping tablets prescribed to me which I found absolutely amazing as it reset my sleep pattern. I did have my husband to get up to the baby though whilst I did this and I know this solution wouldn't suit everyone. I was absolutely desperate and it's the only thing that worked for me.

It totally does get better and I don't think us mums give ourselves enough credit for just how much we do and how much we've been through.

You sound like your doing a great job.