November 09 babies are growing up quick, and mummy's getting used to getting covered in sick!

[PreggoK8]

Hope this has worked...

Hi all,

Loving the idea of a meet up, I'm an essex girl so can definitely do a London one. Maybe we could meet in one of the parks and have a big picnic!

scarlotti your sil sounds like a right pain. I think you have the right idea to give the clothes back and never accept anything she offers again, she is clearly bonkers!

Erika it's so hard when people try to stick there ore in, especially mum's! you are doing a grand job though so try to ignore the comments and carry on as you are. Have there been any developments with you and dp moving in together?

pav you are making my mouth water with all this talk of cupcakes. When you have perfected the perfect cake maybe you could post the recipe on-line for us all, a bit like Kyte's cookies. Congrats on your good nights sleep too!

Millie is still poorly, she has a terrible cough and didn't feed brilliantly yesterday. Then last night she woke at midnight and 3am for a feed and took a while to settle and then ds got me up a couple of times in the night too. I am completely shattered! Ds is at nursery this morning and Millie is napping so I am putting my feet up and not doing the housework!

X posts with you claired hope you get to the bottom of things with the feeding and good luck with the car!

Aw a big picnic in the park sounds great! Mind you, this being Britain, we better have an indoors standby too. July would be best then, of the dates you suggested Laugs, and the babies will be so big and wriggly and a handful fun by then too!

Good luck with the car claire

I'm trying to go to An Education at the big scream today but it's doors at 11, for 11.30, across the other side of town and.... I have a baby attached to my chest. She fussed when I tried to feed her at 9 so had shower, ready to leave and of course, NOW she's hungry. But I'm not going to just bundle her into the sling and go. Not listening to her always ends in trouble.

Annoyingly, it's next week's film I really want to go to - A Single Man, with Colin Firth, but have arranged a doc's appt for Rosa. Her belly button is still weeping a bit - enough to stain her vests. Tried cleaning with breastmilk on doc's advice but not worked so last resort gp said she could 'seal it' somehow. Anyone know about this?

I keep loosing this thread, Paula really keeps me busy. I hope it is still due to her immunisations on monday but last night she fell asleep at 8.30 and then woke up at 9, 10, 11, 12, 3, 4.30 and 6! (At 12 I took her in my bed to make sure she would sleep a little! And after a feed at 6 my husband took her in the living room and I could sleep another hour and a half)
And tonight my husband is going to see a football game before leaving to Austria tomorrow!
Anyway, I'm just to exhausted to comment on everything but

dairy-intolerance, I've read that sometimes their digestive system is still to immature to process dairy products but luckily it doesn't necessarily mean that it will be a problem in future.

meeting, a picknick would really be fun.

erika, our nct-teacher told us to just reply "oh interesting" on good advice and continue doing whatever we want to do. I guess in your case this is difficult but just try to ignore it. I guess, all mums want to "help" their daughters at some point.

scarlotti, is there any chance she has just forgotten that she had actually told you to pass them on to someone else and you only have to remind her of it? After the story a couple of months ago, I guess not. But I would still just remind her, give her back what you still have and forget about it. And of course, NEVER again accept any "help" from her.

ursi that's exactly what I plan to do!

Been for a walk around the park this morning, managed to dodge the snow luckily and had a lovely bracing walk. Feel great now has really blown the cobwebs away!

helips hope Millie is better soon and you get some sleep.

claire hope the car isn't too pricey to fix.

Apologies if I've missed anyone, typing one handed again!

Erika my mum is exactly the same with the advice, although that doesnt annoy me as much as when my step-dad does it, as I think where is he getting his advice from? (I dont mean for this to sound mean or anything, but he hasnt raised any children as babies. He met my mum when I was eleven.) plus he repeats the same advice over and over again. when they had both the children for the first time the other night (when we went on the big family meet) I came back to get them and my step-dad had her propped up on the sofa but kept telling her off as she slowly flopped down. I kept saying to him "SHE CANT SIT UP LIKE THAT. SHE IS A BABY!" and he tells her off for crying, or 'attention-seeking' as he calls it. Babies this age cant be left crying. grizzling is ok, as thats them just fussing but not actually crying. gaa see im going off on one now!!

My mum is the same too, as is my step dad. They are of the 'cry it out' camp so as to avoid 'spoiling' the baby. I think part of it is because that's how they were told to do it and so have to agree with it iyswim.
My mum also will make comments about DS1 if he's looking for attention or wanting something and not being that patient. It's like that colours his personality - they rarely acknowledge the positive traits.
Guess a lot of people are like that though, acknowledging the negative and letting the positive slip by unnoticed...

Ooh a picnic sounds lovely!

Where could we have it? Somewhere near a pushchair-accessible tube stop... I'm scared of those old tube stations with only escalators and a massive drop!

We'd have some crawlers by then too! And the babies would be eating everything solids!

(I am excitable today. It must be the lack of sleep. I feel like I could drop at any minute)

Argh, taken me all day to catch up but I?ve gotten there in the end! I?ve had a productive couple of days, done 3 huge loads of washing, contacted a load of estate agents and arranged some house viewings, viewed 2 houses (one a def poss if they put in a shower and find the plumbing for a washing machine!), etc. Doesn?t sound like a lot now, but it felt like hard work?

Venus - good idea on the honeymoon! We could either do that or put it towards a deposit on a house as we'll want to buy after we?re married. What a shame about your MIL?s cooking! Do you sneak the contents of your spice cupboard into your handbag when visiting to see you through ;) At least that?s your only problem with her.

ErikaMaye If I didn?t have twice as many people to invite to my wedding than we have room for, I?d love you to all come! Can you imagine if you all came - lol Pav with kids?! Mayhem! All of our little babies would be nearly two and a bit of a handful no doubt!
Sorry you?re having a shitty day. I don?t know how you cope with all the "helpful" comments, it must be very hard to bite your tongue. Do you have a tongue left??? Chin up. x

Laugs sorry you?re having problems feeding You are one very determined woman! If you were to stop now, no-one could say you didn?t give it your best and at least he?s had 9 weeks of boob.
A meet up would be fab! I?d definitely be up for it, especially if Pav brings cupcakes ?

Fruitpastels - I think know that sometimes men?s brains are not connected to their mouths! (But their feet are )

Scarlotti your SIL sounds annoying. Sorry. Sounds like you have a good plan of action though.

Lemontop I hope you all feel better soon. Nothing worse than having to deal with a poorly baba whilst you?re ill too.

Claire good luck with the car!

Sorry if I?ve missed anyone x

hurrah DD2 put on a massive (for her) 6 ozs this week!! amazing what a couple of ounces of formula a day makes! however she now cries more..wonder if they are related?!

anyway managed to get near the end of the mammoth packing for a week in spain..

apologies to whoever offered to send me the feeding cups, i kept meaning to thank you but life keeps getting in the way..have discovered if its a mamm bottle..ready made formula..pipping hot and she is watching tv she will take a bottle

toddler driving me demented..what do u do when they refuse to eat?!

hope ye are all doing well..can't beleive how fast time is flying by

Our stupid internet has been playing up so have had loads to catch up on here!

That's great news weston! Was supposed to take Anya to be weighed on Tues but had to go to passport office to get her a passport as we are going to Ireland to have her christened a week on Sat. Everything last minute as usual! I'll take her next week.

Meet up sounds good, not sure I'd be able to make it down to London though, it'd be quite a trek from here.

Laugs you should feel very proud of yourself with the breastfeeding. Agree with Preggo, you have given your lo the best start so don't feel guilty when you feel its time to move to bottles.

Oh Erika, your mum's comments sound just like those my mil makes all the time. So frustrating. You just have to bite your tongue, take a deep breath and count to 10.

Ursi good luck when dh is away. I'm sure you'll manage just fine Don't try to be doing too much while he is away, make sure you sleep when she does in the day so that if you do have disturbed nights, you're not going to get too tired and run down.

Can't remember who mentioned the 12 week thing, but Anya has definitely been off this week, sleeping less during the day and crying ALOT more. Hope it passes soon.

We are still trying to get the house de cluttered. We are going to get it valued next week and then hopefully get it on the market asap. I am in a very ruthless mood and am dumping loads of stuff, it's quite theraputic actually. I'm sure I'll curse myself in a few months when I need the things I'm throwing out!

Hope your weeks are going ok ladies.

On the mechanic's advice we're going to trade in our car before it starts to cost us lots on repairs. So not ideal financially but still excited about a new car!

Taking Ethan for his jags in the morning. I'm sure he'll be fine, I think I'm more worried about my reaction!! Hope I don't bubble...

TOK Best of luck with the house sale.

Weston did you see that supernanny program this week? She definitely advocates no dinner if they refuse to eat. I'd imagine that kind of tough love must be difficult though. All these challenges us first timers have to look forward to!

Glad to hear its not just my parents driving me insane Thanks for your support, ladies. You're such a lovely bunch.

Just popping by for a quick question (and to give you all a laugh... ) -

Am going out for the evening Saturday (Am terrified already), how much milk do you think I need to express? I have no idea how much he takes in. He tends to do a big feed between eight and nine, then wake up at four. So far have expressed... 15oz... Am I being slightly paranoid? Have always had a lot of milk anyway so hasn't been difficult but still... Should I stop now? Am feeling a bit like I should be munching on grass and mooing occasionally!!!

Hope you're all well

Morning all

Erika I make up 6oz for Ioan's 10pm feed and he rarely takes it all, probably takes 5oz on average. He will also have a decent feed at say 6pm and then wakes up for a smaller feed around 4am. If I had to guess at those I'd say the 6pm is probably around the 5oz mark and the 4am is maybe around 3/4 oz. I think you have enough! I'd suggest putting it into 3 batches of 5oz too, so that only one lot needs warming at a time.
Remember too that it's not like formula, in that you can warm through and give to baby, then if it stays at room temp it's ok to give for around 5 or 6 hours or if you pop it back in the fridge it's good for another 24 hours I'd say. You treat it like cows milk as it has antibodies in it.

claire shame about the expense of the new car but very exciting now you have to do it! Do you know what you're getting? With DS2's arrival I've had to move to the mpv category as needed the seats! I do like my car though as it's the least bus like one I could find

TOK good luck with the house sale and the decluttering. I love doing that, feels very therapeutic to get rid of lots of stuff I find. Hope the christening goes well - do you have a family christening gown? We have booked Ioan's but I don't know what to put him in. Had thought about making a gown out of my wedding dress but not sure if that's a bit odd!

weston it was me with the feeding cups glad the weight is increasing though and you've found an easy way to get the formula in. Re toddler eating, I find making faces etc. out of the food works, or one of those plates with sections and put one type of food in each one. If they choose what goes where that's also quite effective ... ignore the similarity to prison food though!!

Thanks for the support re stupid sil. It's an odd situation but there we are. We'll be up there for my nephew's first birthday in March so will take up what I have then and she can have it all back. I'll take back the baby walker they have and that will be the end of any inter-family borrowing!
Oddly, they have offered to have DD and DS1 for a weekend to stay - nice offer but now the cynical part of me is wondering why? Isn't that awful that my reaction is that?

Anyone else starting to look into childcare? Have managed to find an after school club for DS1 (thankfully) and am now starting to look at childminders for DS2. Those of you who do this for their work - what sort of things should I be asking/looking at?

Erika Ethan is 13 and a half pounds roughly at 10 and a half weeks and takes between 5 and 6 oz of EBM at a feed. Then he lies back looking very satisfied! I'm not sure if he takes more from a bottle than he would from me but it definitely knocks him for six.

Scarlotti What car did you go for? I think we'll be looking at a C Max this weekend. We have a dog who would ideally be in the boot of our car so we need something with a big enough boot for dog and pram. Also looking at some estate cars.

We're also hoping to book Ethan's christening for around Easter time and have the dilemma of what to dress him in. I prefer quite traditional gowns but most of the christening "outfits" I've seen for boys are little sailor suits or morning suits with tails in that lovely shiney white or ivory. Not up my street at all. Some of the suits are nice... but I think most are a bit naff. Would be so much easier with a girl!

Don't even ask me about childcare... so stressful! DP is a probationer teacher and may not have a permanent job for the next school year but I know we'll have to arrange childcare well in advance of me returning to work. The grannies can cover one day a week each so our preferred option would be DP in a permanent job and me working a 3 day week but if he doesn't have a permanent job, we'd be better off with me working full time and paying for 3 days childcare each week. Other issues to add in to this stressful situation are that I was almost made redundant 6 weeks before beginning maternity leave so I'm not sure whether my current employer would try to decline any flexible working hours request and the other thing is they are only obliged to consider one flexible working request per 12 month period so I can't even ask for a 3 day week just now then try to alter it if DP doesn't have a permanent job.

And all this before I even consider the emotional side of putting our little one into childcare... I think I could cope with one day a week but would struggle if he was going to the grannies Mon, Tue then nursery or childminder Wed, Thu Fri.

Are you thinking about using a childminder for the wee one then? Can I ask why? I'm still undecided about childminder or nursery so I'm asking everyone's opinion at the moment! He would be around 8 months when I go back to work.

My goodness that has turned into an epic post!! Now off to the docs for Ethan's jags...

Thanks Clair and Scarlotti I have 15oz frozen and 2oz I have just expressed in the fridge... Reckon I'll easily get another 3oz spare today, so that will be 20oz... Did I mention I'm scared?! And will probably only be gone a few hours...

Clair am having the same issue re Christening! Think I might just get a gown to be honest. Hope the jabs go okay

i wish id got a gown for ds's christening, we had a smart navy outfit on him but it would have been nice to have had a more traditional outfit, which i will for Belle. asked my best friend to be her god-mother the week after Belle was born, but she hasnt come to see her since. just a couple of emails asking how we are. hope she hasnt changed her mind.

Scarlotti I thought once you'd given the baby the EBM it had to be used within an hour?

Erika That sounds like loads! You'll both be fine. It's hard leaving them the first time, but a few hours off will leave you much revived. It's amazing the little things you appreciate - like being able to walk up straight, not pushing a pram or cradling a baby. Kellymom has a guide to how much breastfed babies take here. They reckon babies between 1 and 6 months take around 25oz in 24 hours, so if he has 6 feeds a day you'd expect him to take just over 4oz for a feed. I have to say, James seems to have a lot more than this, but I only really give him expressed milk in the evening, when he is at his hungriest.

Claire You could arrange childcare for the worst-case scenario of DP not getting a job and you working full-time, then hopefully when he does get a job, ask to reduce your hours and nursery days? I'm also having a nursery v. childminder dilemma.

Forgot to say, James slept from midnight until 9am!!!!

Scarlotti here is a link to help you choose the right cm. I use this website all the time to help me with my business.

Off to collect DS1 from pre-school. Catch up later!

Oh yes scarlotti can you clarify the ebm?! I have been throwing any unused away after he has taken some from the bottle - can we re-use it for several hours then, even if it has been drank from? That would be useful.

7 hours straight through YEY! i love my little boy, he is being good to me He fed/slept/fed/slept from about 8-10pm, had an hour awake, then fed another 2 times until 11pm, we went to bed, he had a suckle, into bed, fidget about for half hour, went to sleep, and woke at 6:30am . Unfortunately, DD wet the bed at just gone midnight and refused to let DH change her, and then she had a night terror at 4:30am, so i did not get 7 hours...but still . Then, after he had a feed at 6:30am, he slept on me til 7am, then back to sleep in the bed til 9am

laugs x-posted - YEY! did you get a good sleep too?

erika don't forget to pump some milk before you leave otherwise your boobs will be rock hard!

Jags went fine, no tears from me and just a sad cry from Ethan, no screaming.

Weston When ds used to refuse to eat we used to leave it, put food in fridge and let him come back if he changed his mind. No dc will ever starve him/herself. We still every now and again go down the 'just one more spoonful' route- sometimes it works and sometimes not. My mum will always give pudding even if ds doesn't eat his main course but I wouldn't.

Erika my mum is coming up next week and I am fully prepared for the non stop advice. She has got much, much better since my sister and I have both had dcs, we just tell her to shut up (nicely usually, but sometimes not!) if she's too annoying/wrong.

Sometimes though 'outsiders' - ie not the parents- can see things in a less emotionally charged way, e.g. I know I will maybe leave Hedy to try to sleep for longer if mum is here as mum will (generally rightly) tell me that her cries are tired cries. When we went on holiday with my sister and her dc both dh and I thought she and her dp went to their dc too soon when he was supposed to be going down for his nap etc.