October 2007 - these little piggies are growing up fast!

[alicet]

Ok so a pretty boring thread title but thought we needed some distance from the last one!

Morning Dal
Leg is fine thanks and as far as I can tell the headlice have gone.

How you feeling? If you are miserable how about trying a couple of bottles for a few days, just to give your sore boobs a rest and time to heal. I'm sure bf experts will disagree but surely it's better that you feel happy in yourself and you don't want to make yourself ill by continuing when in pain. I assume you've tried nipple sheilds etc?
You have to stand firm with everyone and you can use Dylan as a reference to prove you know best, you're their mum and your instincts are going to far outweigh their opinions when they don't even 'know' Miles.
Try not to feel pressurised from anyone, maybe make a list about the pros and cons of everything so it's easier to weigh it up thasn your head being muddled, probably from lack of sleep too.

Dal-Have found this

It basically says that the charts in the red book are for ff babies and bf babies do not gain weight as fast from around three months so may have a little drop and it is normal.

I have to start getting ready to go to my friends little boys party, but have a read of it and have a big x

Hey NC, glad your leg is ok and the lice have gone.
Nipple shields don't really help I'm across, seems just as painful. I have considered giving him a bottle or two to see how it goes but just keep going round and round in circles about it in my head.

Pros are that I'll not be in pain, dh can share the feeds and I can see what he's getting and I won't have the overwhelming feeling of sole responsibility.

Cons are that he might not accept the bottle as he hasn't on the one occasion we tried him with it. I'll feel like I'm depriving him of the comfort of breastfeeding that he seems to like. I'd rather him have breadtmilk but I know formula isn't 'evil' after all Dylan survived just fine on it. Oh and I'll feel judged by people for stopping breasteeding.

I just don't understand why it's suddenly become painful on both sides, I'm not doing anything different

Thanks for the link nc, have fun at the party. Please ignore my spelling mistakes, stupid predictive text on phone!

Dal-You don't need to feel judged, just don't tell anyone! It's nobody's business but yours anyway.
I really don't know what to suggest re the pain-is it hurting all over or is it the nipple?

Will be back later, got DD1 sports day after the party.

Well the bad size just hurts on the nipple like it's neing sawn off. The other side is just nipple area too but more round the base of the nipple. It doesn't help that on the bad side he occasionally pulls back then bites the end then sucks it back in, this is very painful!

Dal; I agree with NC it is no ones business but yours if you continue to bf or not.You have done fabulously to get this far especially when it wasn't easy for you. Miles will be taking just as much as he needs/wants you cant force more down him and now he is 3 months he could be sucking harder/faster which might be why you are sore again...as long as you are eating healthily he will be getting enough nutrition... however another reason it is still uncomfortable (I must admit the first 12 weeks were not nice for me but after that things got easier) could be if Miles has got thrush at all (that can make you very sore)...if it is none of the above perhaps think about expressing a feed or two for Dh to give and let you rest (I will admit however that it took me so long to express it wasnt worth the effort and Alex point blank refused a bottle from 7 weeks) What ever you decide is the right route for you and Miles dont let those busy-bodies get to you. You are a wonderful mother and you knew better than the so called experts when it came to Dylan so trust your instincts again.
As to the ttc again thing...if we all waited until the 'perfect time' (ie finacially secure, perfect home, optimum health etc etc etc) to have children the human race would be very much an endangered species my gt grandparents raised 7 boys and 3 girls in a 2 bed + box room and were considered to be 'well off'...

NC Quite seriously get yourself checked again for whip lash...I was told to do it after an accident 15yrs ago when I had no sign of injury whatsoever because, as I was told, "your car may be written off and you wont get enough from their insurance to replace it, but whiplash injury cant be proven and pays out enough (£2K)for a cheap replacement car. Cynical, you might think but I didnt take that advice and got £500 for a car I had just spent £1000 on ..I felt like I had been penalised for an accident that was none of my fault.

Choc; Hope you are feeling less 'ick now.

Inzi; I am sending some positive vibes for some lovely news so you can enjoy the last 7 weeks of your pg.

WWAJC; sorry to see on FB that you were stuck on the M60 on Tues too.

Hi to Alice, BB4,Crochet, Apricot, Muppet Strawberry, HeartofGlass (hope you and los are all ok) and everyone else, hope you and yours are all doing well xxx

Floria - thankyou so much for the words of reassurance. I did consider thrush but niether of us have any symptoms of that as far as I can tell, no white patches in his mouth and nippples aren't pink and shiny, no shooting pains... It just feels really sore like a bad latch really but no matter what I do it still hurts. I know it must be partially to do with latch and probably one or two feeds where he might have dine some damage although can't pinpoint when. I wish I was one of those people this all came naturally too but alas I'm not.

Gonna get a different type of bottle to try him with once dh finishes work and see how that goes. I might try to mix feed him for a while the maybe end up just breastfeeding at night or something like that. I just hope I can get him to take a bottle some of the time cause I'm tired of the pain.

Thanks for the ttc advice too , liked the story about all those kids in a 2 bed house!

How's Alrx's foot today?

Aww Dal...I'm sure you are tired of the pain (though I'm glad it isn't thrush)..I do hope he'll take a bottle and give you a break, you have done marvelously to get this far....and just think, in less than 12 weeks you'l be offering solids
thanks for asking after alexs' foot..he is still lame but the angle of the foot is turning out less than 45 degrees now rather than more and he isnt falling over even when I give him a break from the tape (1 hour yesterday..2 hours today)at least he no longer blows a gasket when I'm taping it up..if it keeps improving like this I dont think we will need physio (relieved emoticon) I will admit that todays swimming lesson was a relief..letting him burn off energy without driving me mental...unable to climb and jump off things like usual he has been teaching himself somersaults and head stands, usually on the furniture...I have had visions of the next trip to A&E being for a broken neck!!!

Hi ladies

Dal-It does sound as though you've got him on an arkward latch iyswim and it has not been rectified. I imagine it's easy done as you've been so determined to get through the pain that you have toughed it out all this time. Would it be worth giving yourself a few feeds rest until they are a bit better and seeing if you can get some professional help to latch him on more comfortably?

I don't think it's doing Miles any harm, he is a perectly happy content little monkey. I am a firm believer in mum being happy and baby following though and as FT says, you have done so well up to now, whatever you do you could never be a failure-which is what I'm sure you're worried about.

We will support you whatever you do and we're better rl people anyway

FT-Oooh bet it was a relief for him to get in the pool, bless him. Hope it heals really soon, maybe a few trips to the swimming baths are in order for a couple of weeks.

Re whiplash claim-It has already been put in motion from my insurance somehow-They get quite a lot for refering me I think so it was in their interest to get me quick DD1 is also putting a claim in apparantly as she is still complaining of neck pain[but only when it suits her] so we shall see what happens. Really wish I could have my car back as I loved it but people keep saying I'm silly. May not get another car and just use my new triler/buggy forever and pull it on my bike-when everything stops hurting, it is very easy to push though.

Been aching badly today and something is wrong with my big toe on one side, I'm falling apart Am going for a spa afternoon tomorrow and get a back massage so am so looking forward to that

Hope everyone is well and have lovely weekends if I don't get back on xx

Hello All Sorry, been MIA for the past few weeks. DH has switched over to working nights for the summer, so we have all had to readjust our schedules. Its been chaos! With him home during the day, all I want to do is run errands and get things done that I cant do when he is working. That then throws off baby nap times, which makes everyone miserable! Its also been really hot and humid here, so I really feel lazy by the time mid afternoon arrives. Sigh....

We are also in the process of interviewing for a nanny. Its been hard. They are quite expensive, but would work better than nursery (since we are both shift workers). I am exhausted! I go back to work in a couple of months and need to get the childcare situation sorted. I wish there was an easy solution that required no thought!! LOL

Been looking at all your FB pics of the BBQ. Looks like the LO's had a wonderful time! Wow! There was a lot for them to do! The adults looked like they were having fun as well ;)

Dal I hope things are going better for you. I agree with all the other ladies that you have to do what is right for you. I had quite a bit of pressure put on me by others when I was trying to BF DD1. It just made me feel bad. I lasted only 6 weeks due to her poor latch. Look how well you have done! Its no one's business at the end of the day but your own. If you can do mixed feeds, that may make you feel better, heal up your nipples, and then you can always try and go back to just BF. I mix-fed both Sofia and Marco for a few months until the meds helped with my poor milk supply. Now Marco is almost a year and I am preparing myself to wean him. He hasnt had a bottle in months!

FT Hope Alex is healing up nicely. How stressful for you. The pool is perfect for running off energy though! Its been 42 degrees with the humidity here and we have gone to the pool everyday for a couple of hours. Sofia and Marco have been sleeping wonderfully!!

Inzi How are you doing?

Hello to everyone else! Its back to baking for me. Testing out a couple of creations for Marco's first birthday in a couple of weeks!

Thanks again Floria, feeding is a very emotional thing for me as I'm sure it is for all of us to some degree. It's the most basic of things to be able to nourish your baby and my confidence is easily shaken after what we went through with Dylan.

I think I'd go mad without you wonderful ladies!

Glad Alex's foot is improving, sorry but I had to laugh at him doing summersaults on the sofa, I can just imagine it!

Nc - you're right, being a failiure/ letting Miles down is what I'm ultimately afraid of.

I think my latch is as good as I can get it, I have had lots of help from the lactation consultant here and been to some of the breastfeeding support groups. You are right though, it's not 100% right it tends to be 95% right most of the time then if I become complacent it slips to maybe 85% and does a bit if damage then I have a sore few days like I've just had.

I have gone back to basics and really been concentrating on nothing else but my latch and been usung lots of lansinoh, it's a little better, bearable. Still gonna try and get him to accept a bottle though as I want a break and like the idea of mix feeding. I got some mam ones from boots yesterday, might try one later today.

I have decided to ignore the health visitor as much as possible. After all they're only worried about weight gain in case it points to an underlying medical issue and I know Miles is perfectly fine.

Glad you've got your claim in for whiplash, good idea. Sorry you've got a problem with your toe now, glad you're off to the spa though, just what you need.

Bb4 - sounds like you've had a hectic time of late! Hope you settle in to a routine once you all adjust to the nights.

Hope you manage to find a nanny you're happy with, must be a difficult task but I'm sure the right one is out there.

Thanks for the advice re feeding, it gives me hope. I would be happy if he got some breastmilk till 6 months, even if he's mix fed, that's the rough goal I have in my head. I hope that if he takes the bottle my nipples do heal, the 'bad' side has had a crack for 16 weeks now I even saw the doc to see if antibiotics would help but she didn't think so. Even the good side has a blister at the moment, sigh!

Well at least it's almost the weekend, feeling a bit more positive today and trying to stay strong about the health visitor and not get stressed about it.

Hi to everyone I haven't mentioned, hope you are all ok, thinking of you x

I am at the end of my rope with Sofia today! I thought the terrible two's were coming to an end! Someone has turned my gorgeous but stubborn baby girl into an absolute nightmare! Today I attempted to put her down for her nap and she screamed blue murder, tore the bedroom apart by pulling the sheets of her sisters' bed and emptying the closet of its contents. Then she peed on the floor (DH had forgotten to put a pull up on her), and woke up the sleeping baby so that I now had 2 babies screaming. I think she finally settled for about and hour (much shorter than usual) and then started up again. She was also miserable, cranky, and demanding for the rest of the evening. This all started when she figured out how to climb out of her crib last week. DH removed the front rail to convert the crib into a day-bed. The problem is, now that she can get out, she wont sleep in there anymore. She sneeks into her sisters' bed at night, and wont go down for nap during the day (because sister is not there). NIGHTMARE! I am totally losing my mind with all the screaming and crying. Marco is now constantly being woken up from his naps, so I never get a break.... I was in tears last night out of sheer exhaustion. I am actually starting to look forward to going back to work, if only to get out of the house and away from the screaming for a few hours a day! Sorry... needed to unload that before I try to go to bed. Between that, and trying to decide whether we should go with a nanny (we found the perfect girl but she is a bit beyond our budget) or nursery (great set up, but the hours arent always accomodating to my shiftwork), the stress is starting to crack me!

Jeez, I just typed a big long reply and it's gone!

Bb4 - Sorry you're having such a hard time at the moment, they really like to test the boundaries at this age don't they! Maybe she's just a bit unsettled by the change in routine? I'm sure it's a phase and will pass, hopefully sooner rather than later.

It's so hard to stay form with them when they're so stubborn and you're so tired... Maybe put the side back on the crib to give yourself a few days rest then try again when you have more energy for it?

((big hugs)) to you x

Inzi - How you doing? X

Hi to everyone else

BB4 - hugs to you, what a rough time. How are you feeling today? Have you tried reward charts for Sofia? I'm thinking of starting them for Anya to use at difficult times of the day, bathtime for instance as she often plays up when she's tired. Don't know how effective they are at this age but I think FT uses them for Alex. How awkward would the hours at nursery be? Would dh be able to do the drop-offs/pick-ups that you can't do?

Dal - Sorry you're having worries about Miles' weight - I think those blasted charts should be burned. Maybe it's just the way your family is - babies born big and then slim down as they grow - Dylan is such a healthy toddler, after all the stress the hv's put you under with him, he's fine. Miles will be the same - I'm sure it's pretty much impossible to underfeed if you're bf isn't it? Surely one of the points of bf is that you produce the right amount of milk and continually adjust it to your baby's demands? I've got no answer to bf problems I'm afraid, but don't worry about other people judging you - apart from a few lunatics fanatical mums, even mums who bf without any problems accept that not everybody finds it that easy or can do it long-term. And anybody who isn't a mum and hasn't tried doesn't have a right to comment on your decision about it. You've done the most important bit, the first few weeks, anything from this point would be a bonus but it's hardly essential. Mixed feeding sounds like a good compromise.
About the possible pg, stop worrying about it! If you are, then you are, and you will cope fine . Ignore everybody else, it's a decision for you and your dh alone - do what feels right for your family. Miles will love having a sibling so close in age as they grow up - there's no right or wrong age gap, they all have advantages/disadvanatges. And there will always be practical reasons why you should wait - you'll find solutions as you go along if you have to. (Lol at NC's "I'm usually quite good at the 'sod em' attitude" - I'd never have guessed !)

Inzi - hope your cold clears up quickly. How did your mum get on with the cardiac nurse? Hope your dog's problem gets better soon with the antibiotics - poor thing. And can't believe you're 33 weeks - that's gone so fast!

NC - glad you're feeling better and that you managed to exterminate the headlice - yuk! How was your spa day ?

FT - yes, Tuesday was fun wasn't it!? It took me nearly 3 hours to get home from Stockport. Glad Alex's foot it getting better - he must be relieved that he can get some tape-free time now.

My cold's still lurking around - not too bad apart from the cough and the volume/colour of stuff coming out of my nose. Don't feel ill with it now though.

All of our office, 30-odd people, went on a works day out yesterday - a 4 mile hike in the Derbyshire hills followed by a pub lunch. I enjoyed it more than I thought I would - there were only 2 bad uphill bits - and it was a nice change to chat to people I only usually get the chance to say hello to. I thought I'd be unable to move this morning but I don't feel too bad, apart from I have very sore ankles, which is my own fault for not having any proper walking shoes. I'm a bit sunburnt though , the weather was much better than forecast. Still, better than working !

Have a good weekend all x

Hi ladies

Sorry I have been awol again.

I just need to come on and have a SCREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!

Potty training is doing my head in. A total of 4 wees on the potty all week. 1 on wednesday, 3 on thursday and nothing since

trying not to get uptight about it but just had to come on here and scream before I scream at Ben. I know I need to be patient, but I am failing terribly. I just don't think he is ready but I need him to be trained. How long do I need to cope with it all before he 'gets it'?

inzi - how long did it take you with Jane?

I have tried all sorts but its not working.

the latest today, he was sat on his potty lovely, because I noticed him holding himself, but then he said he didn't want a wee, but no less than a minute later he has pulled his pants up, come in the lounge and done it on the floor. 10 mins after that he has gone upstairs and weed all on sam's carpet So thats a total of 5 wee's in trousers so far today. One positive of the day was that he pooed in his potty first thing, which I suppose is one thing to be thankful for.

I am just getting so frustrated as I have spent hours following him around, reading to him on the potty and then he pulls his trousers up and does it 5 mins later. I really thought we had it cracked on Thursday but it has now reverted to the sam as mon and tues

I will try and catch up with everyones news at some point but I never seem to have the time, I do try and read though

hello everyone - been meaning to pop in for yonks

lll - great tip I got for potty training / allowing them to feel wetness was to put nappy over the top of pants. Lets you do the whole 'woohoo big boy/girl pants' thing and carseats / pushchairs / going out

I found ds has taken to it v well now - but I did try some months back and it was just hopeless. Agree it will all come right soon enough. Tho tbh I'm at a bit of a loss now when to ever start on the night time training. He's still in a cot and I really don't want to be arsed gettng up in the middle of the night with him I know that is slack but have enough sleep interuptions from dd. Shamefully he told me he needed a wee a few nights back and I just replied 'oh do it in yr night nappy' and crawled back to bed

oh inzi - re contractions. I've been having a few really intense pangs - like hold my breath / grit teeth / swear plunging sensations in my back. Takes me right back to the pain of actual childbirth. Tho they are only lasting about 10 seconds and just on sporadic days so no pattern to them. Have just put em down to irritable uterus thing I was told about a few weeks back. And a cue to take it easy like you say

I'm jealous of the crap weather yr having as well. sunshine schmunshine. Overrated

Dal - re the feeding - could you have thrush? Like not just topical but inside as well? Remember /finally getting some fluconozale from gp and it all getting better. However, don't beat yrself up if you do decide to mix feed. And ditto to ignore the hv. have had the too thin and then too fat with both dc.

babyblue4 - can empathise with you. We have so many tantrums. He gets really vile at 5pm every day - that on top of numerous times during the day when he can't watch shrek again / eat crisps / go swimming.. oh anything at all really. 'No I don't like it' said like a toddler victor meldrew is prob his most used phrase. Thing is, dh gives in to him loads more than me and looks after him whilst I go to work which is making situation worse. And he gets up too bloody early (ds that is - with dh)

right am being shouted to come downstairs so will try and catch up with rest of you later. A wheezy hello and tired wave to you all wiith lots of love off me

Well, so much for better days Looks like the tantrums are here to stay, at least for the forseeable future. Sofia is now flat out refusing to sleep in her crib. She will only nap if she is sleeping in DD1's bed and if the door to her room is left open. Sigh... I refuse to let my almost 3 year old run the household, but I am reaching the point where I feel like saying bump it... do what you want! I wish we could put the rail back on the crib, but its pointless, as she can climb out (and I dont want her falling and getting hurt). I am thinking of taking all the rails off and turning it into a toddler bed and maybe then she will sleep in it. I feel badly for DD1 who has to share everything with her sister, including her bed! You could probably hear her screams up and down the street today when we were trying to put her down for nap and for bedtime...

Nanny situation still not sorted, so am still stressed... Its givimg me more grey hair! LOL

And speaking of stress... Inzi at your labour pains. Do you think it could be stress related??? Try and get some rest and stay off your feet. Stay hydrated too.

LLL Keep trying with the potty training. Sofia was the same way. She would be dancing around, but would not go on the potty. Instead, she would wait til I pulled up her pants and then she would run away and pee in them! What worked for me, was putting the potty in front of the TV, and letting her sit and watch. Eventually, she relaxed and went. After doing that a few times, she got the hang of it and started using the loo instead. The poos are still a problem for us, as are the night time pees. She wears a pull up for nap and bed. My kids have a history of being slow to train at night. Their bladders are not big enough to hold it, and no amount of me cutting off fluids or waking them up to go helps. I just have to wait til their bladders grow and catch up. DD1 was in night pull-ups til 7 and DS1 until 6. Anyway... I agree about not putting a pull up on during the day. I dont even do it when we go out. I have a towel down on her car seat, and I always walk with extra clothes in the diaper bag. She has been pretty good, so I cant complain. Tomorrow we are out in the park all morning, so I am taking my potty with me.

Anyway... off to bed for me. Older DCs doing a Triathlon tomorrow, so I have to be up at the crack of dawn. Yaaaaawwwn....

I've given up today and put pull ups on him

Took his nightime nappy off at 7.45 this morning and as of 1.30 he has still not weed. I know he wants to go as he keeps holding himself and crossing his legs but he is getting quite upset when we are trying to get him to sit. No amount of pleading, niceness, bibery or firmness is helping at all. He is holding it in rather than trying to wee on the potty. He is also tired so the pull ups have gone on for now. Will try and decide what to do when he wakes up from his nap.

Just popping in, will catch up soon but Dylan has a stomach bug . He was sick 3 times before bed last night and then hot all night and is feeling very sorry for himself this morning. I have been giving him a little bit of water every 15 mins in the hope of keeping him hydrated without him being sick ad he couldn't even keep water or milk down last night. He's also had some maltesers cause he spotted them and I felt cruel saying no when he's clearly hungry. Not sure what food to give him though? Any ideas?

Dal - Oh dear, poor Dylan, there seems to be an awful lot of illness around at the moment. Will he eat dry cereal or toast?

He seems a bit better now. Had some stewed apple, cheese puffs and dolly mixtures and banana... What a mixture! He's less hot anyway and has kept his milk and water down so gonna give him his second bottle and see if he'll have a nap. Good suggestion lll, might try that when he wakes