October 2007 - these little piggies are growing up fast!

[alicet]

Ok so a pretty boring thread title but thought we needed some distance from the last one!

Hi all
Dal!! You star, he's fab! I would take each feed as it comes and try not to look too far ahead. I really hope the consultant can give some good advice

HOG - fab news on the pregnancy offering you tentative hugs x

Floria - was going to ask how 'operation no-boobs' was going. How are the nights now? Glad you had a lovely birthday xx

Well, as you may know from facebook dh has had an accident skiing. He was on the slope for 15 mins and had a fall and he has ruptured his cruciate (sp?) ligament at the back and bruised his medial and bone. Nice. He's stuck in Geneva as our friend drove them and he's still skiing. I'm a bit to annoyed that he can't take dh to the airport but I don't know that he hasn't offered and dh said it was okay. Here is tough -NC I really don't know how you do it - as Toby is teething and I think he's coming down with some sort of bug as he's not eating much - a couple of spoonfuls each meal - and he's not really drinking. I gave him watered down formula this morning and he kept it down though does seem to be a little sick after each meal. I'm having to take him downstairs to the playroom where I've set up the travel cot as he cries and wakes Henry.

Speaking of Henry he's being a nightmare. The terrible two's are definately here! He refuses most things I ask him to do, he wants to do everything himself and refuses help. He still hits/punches/kicks Ollie and laughs when you tell him off. There is some light as he loves to door the electric doors on the car so I say if he 'xyz's' then he won't get to do the door and Ollie will.

Here's an example
If I say we're going out so need to put coats on he shouts 'NO!!' at me. I've counted to 3, asked him to come when he's ready, let him go without a coat (he didn't bat an eyelid even though it was tipping it down) pinned him down and put it on with him kicking and screaming. He just likes an argument I'm really hoping this is just a phase as it's very wearing....

Anyone got any tips???

Need to go an clear up ready for battle tomorrow. Dh not home till friday but fat lot of good he's going to be anyway. I'll be ferrying him around next week to various app I assume. Really good timing as it's the easter holidays for nearly 4 weeks. arrrrggghhh!!!!

Dal-Should be fine, I'm sure they'll leave you a card and you can arrange a further delivery or collection. Muppet has good advice with the feeding, just take each one as it comes, hopefully the bf people can help.

HOG- Didn't mean to be so flippant when I said good news, was rushing and didn't want to miss you out. I really really hope the congratulations will stand and everything progresses as it should.

Muppet-Oh what a bad time you've had. Sorry to hear about DH, how selfish of him to go and hurt his leg in the holidays! I'm sure he can erm, be useful somehow...not sure how yet, will get back to you on that! Re the tsntrums, I find bribery is the best form of diffusing situations, like you're already doing. Ignore if possible. I ignore Shannon when she has one, but she get's herself in to a right snotty state sometimes. Just try and ride them out
Is Toby crawling properly yet? Keep meaning to ask.

Inzi-how's the pt going?

Had HV today, she came because of the hospital visit when Shannon fell down stairs as the hospital asked her to, luckily she said straight away that I'm not to worry and she felt really bad for me as she knows I'm not being neglectful, just that it was an accident. Good to know I suppose, but how can she judge me from just a few visits?? I suppose they get a feel for that kind of thing, am grateful anyway, was panicking a bit tbh.

Have started on my assignments that are due in in May, I don't want to get really stressed near the due date like last time. Although noone seems to want to help with childcare as usual so it will be a case of Dora fests for Shannon whilst I try to get on with them. So I may not be around on MN as much but will probably post sporadic profanitic status updates on FB.

We're also going to Guernsey on Saturday for a few days so will be awol for a while.

Hi to everyone else, FT, LLL and others I've missed. Hope you're all well

no no no you didn't sound flippant. Nah - trying to be all casual and breezy myself. It IS good news for me to have got this far and hopefully haemotoma is just a blip. That will have reabsorbed by next scan. This is my lucky number seven - I keep singing that 'wear yr love like heaven' song (definition of sound?) from me yoof

Ta all for your nice words

Dal - well done with the feeding. I struggled loads to bf ds. Think I called / saw every bf councellor in brum - and the laleche /nct helplines. Have you asked on here for any advice? I know its tricky cos they can't actually see but I found some good support / encouragement from likes of tik tok et al. Sure the engorgement will settle down soon enough once yr body twigs m's feeding patterns but not nice. Going to look at yr pics now

NC - glad things went well with the hv. And well done for getting cracking on them assignments. Have a lovely few days away - I really want to go to guernsey

muppetgirl - yr poor dh Hope he gets home soon. Henry sounds just like ds. Just when I think he couldn't get any stroppier, he pulls something else out the bag. Noooooooooooooooooooooowwww (an arsey no!) is a frequent one. Accompanied by flnging himself onto the floor.. kicking, screaming. Really innocuous things seem to trigger it as well..ah well. Deep breath!

Hello lovely ladies.

Sorry I have been so crap and not been on for ages. Real life been getting in th way a bit and then by the time I get the chance to post I just think I don't ahve time to catch up properly and then it gets worse!

Just skim read - hope I haven't missed anything huge!

Clearly huge congrats to Dal - have already heard news from her by text and seen the pocs! Hope all still going well!

Inzi I wouldn't worry about that tosser on the weight loss thread who claimed to be from here (hope you didnt' think it was me as I was awol!) - it is easy to click on your profile and see where you have been posting. Didn't recognise writing style. Did crossmy mind that it could be LES shit stirring but didn't sound like her...

Hope potty training going OK or that you have decided to leave it for a while. We have been potty training Adam - just under 2 weeks ago he announced 'I want to wear big boy pants like Sam' so we went for it. Didn't stay in though - just went about usual stuff with a potty and lots of spare clothes with us and choc buttons as bribes. He is doing great - already dry during his naps and most nights! At this rate he'll be out of night nappies before Sam who is still sodden in the morning!

In my experience potty training my 2 was easy because they were really ready (waited with both until they asked to wear pants even though they had both been using potty off and on for months). Whereas friends who tried to do it before this struggled a lot because their dcs weren't ready. I don't think there is any shame in deciding to go back to nappies - sure you will make the right decision.

Inzi and Floria sorry to hear you have both had upsetting anniversaries - hope you are both OK xxx

HOG tentative congrats on your pregnancy but totally understand you wanting to keep things quiet until scan... Fingers crossed.

We had some devastating news today. Good friends had a stillborn baby girl at 27 weeks. They had been having tests since there was a minor anomaly on their 20 week scan - last I heard they were waiting for some results then I heard from them today that sadly their dd was stillborn. Can't think of many things worse. Know Inzi and Floria have been through this too - if you have any advice for how I can best support them it would be very gratefully received.

ANyway I'm off up to bed now and I'll do my very best to not leave it so long next time! I still think of you all often!

Hello,

just to say sorry for disappearing again. I am really overwhelemed with work/home/everything right now and have not been feeling so well. You probably won't see much of me until the holidays. Am thinking about seeing the Dr because my anxiet is so bad right now but not keen on just being given drugs. I actually think I need to speak to someone but I know their are huge waiting lists just to see someone for five minutes so that seems kind of pointless.

Darly congratulations to you. How is the feeding going? What sort of pain are you getting? I had lots of problems too so if I can do anything to help let me know. A feed at a time is good advice, I really hope it gets better soon.

Morning ladies

HOG-tis definately the year for lucky number 7

Alice So sorry to hear about your friends baby. I can't think of anything worse than losing a child either. I've not been in that position but I think all you can do is be there for them, take cues from them, if they want to talk, let them, if they wan't to get on with things and keep it to themselves for a while-let them whilst making it clear you're there if they need you.
Wow at Adam being dry on a night, Shannon is so nowhere near trsaind on a night time.

Choc-Sorry to hear you're feeling anxious. I'd definately go to see your GP. Even if there is a long waiting list, the quicker you're on it the better, even if you only do need 5 minutes.
My GP gave me medication and tbh I didn't think they had done much but Rich says that I seem happier...

Shannon is ill today, diarroea yesterday, vomiting last night and a temp of 38.6, hacving to give calpol every 4 hours to keep it down. Chicken pox and german measles are going around, hope it's neither of them. Was meant to be packing and getting some assignment done today, don't see me doing much, my eyes are so tired they're hurting.

NC; Poor Shannon I hope it is just a virus and quickly over with...I really do wish I lived closer so I could help with a bit of baby sitting. I hope you can manage to get some work done so you can enjoy the weekend, Guernsey is wonderful (I had a magical childhood holiday there and remember it well).Enjoy and recharge your batteries (glad the ads are doing their job). And good luck with the assignments.

Alice; good to see you! Fab news about Adams potty training...over night too!!!! So terribly sorry about your poor, poor friend..there is not a lot you can do really..I hope they have a funeral and say goodbye properly, that helped me to some extent, we took a rose to lay on her coffin and the ceremony was really supportive, I now wish I had had the ceremony open to all the family because they never got to see anything,(just I was big one weekend and not so big the next) so she never really existed in their lives...(I still see shock on my Mils face when I mention Robyn as if she had forgotten there was ever a granddaughter)... but I needed ads to get through the first few months because I felt so alone in my grief...support and sympathy are very forthcoming in the first few weeks but people seem to expect you to either 'get over it' or are frightened/too embarrassed to mention it (especially those who are pgor have small children already)...I also think the releasing of balloons in a significant spot is quite cathartic but perhaps not just yet.

HOG;I'm so sorry..read your earlier post too fast and saw DD as Dh...not that it changes the level of fear at the need for medical assistance ... you really have had a stressful month or so. When will you find out if the haemotoma has gone? 20wk scan? 7 was my lucky number with Alex. I'm sure this will be luck 7 for you too. You are doing a fab job of keeping upbeat.

Muppet; deep sympathy on the difficult few days single parenting...I hope Toby gets better quickly...and Dhs ligament repairs quickly too (ouch!)..as for Hen have you tried stickers? We have a reward chart in our bedroom, he gets a sticker each morning he waits for the 'magic'(christmas) lights round his door to go on (they are on a timer set for 6.30)...5 stickers and he can have a treat (atm the promise is for a trip to his fave soft play venue).... I'm also going to be using it for putting his shoes on to go out without a wrestling match. Failing that we also use the naughty step, yesterday he pulled the shoe cupboard over (narrowly missing squashing himself)and I shouted, more in shock than anger, but he took himself off to the naughty chair and 'punished' himself until I came to get him and say I wasn't angry, just frightened that he had hurt himself

Chocstar; I'm sorry you are feeling the strain...I think getting on that list is imperative even if it is`just for 5mins at first, once you are on their books I'm sure they will find more time for you. I totally understand your reticence at using ads but in my limited experience they do help you get over the worst just as a crutch helps a broken leg...you throw them away as soon as they are no longer needed. If you want to talk about anything on here, we are more than happy to lend an ear and a shoulder anytime...if you don't want to vent publicly but want someone to listen please feel free to email me or msg me on face book anytime.

Must attend to my poor neglected son (and dog)...time for the shoe battle again [joy]

chocstar - really sorry to hear your stuggling. I would agree with Floria in that ad's have their uses and as long as they are seen as an aid to calm you in readiness for other therapies that will help change your thinking then they are fine. If they are given as the sole treatment then I would be heistant. I hate that there are waiting lists but view it as the ad's have to have a certain time for them to begin working so maybe think of the wait as not as a bad thing but something that when you are called you will be more ready and able to move forward, see the woods for the trees and just approach talking about what's troubling you with a sense of calm. If you started right now, could you say that you wouldn't be very anxious about it?
I also think you need to look at the lists that if you're not on one then the 1st app will be the same distance away today as tomorrow whereas if you're on the waiting list each new day is a day nearer to the front of the queue...

Are you managing your day? are your anxieties interferring with your normal day?

Alice - so sorry for your friends. Again Floria has given great advice from an insiders pov. It's an awful situation for them lovely to hear from you though xxx

Nc - have a fab weekend and try to relax/enjoy/forget about college!

The boys have knackered me and although dh is coming home tomorrow he can't really help when it really matters -in the night- as he won't be able to get up and down the stairs hopefully they might all relax a little though as Henry keeps asking where daddy is...

will be back later
xx

Thanks ladies, I think I will get an appointment. I have taken AD's before, then I managed to get off them. I have also had anxiety meds in the past. I just don't like the idea of them even though I know they can be helpful. I need to do something as I do feel a bit like I am cracking up right now. I can't even enjoy my time with Dareh because that horrible anxious feeling is with me all the time. I hate it because my mum had lots of mental health problems and I have this fear of being like her and at the moment I kind of am. I want to be someone who copes with life, not a 'problem' person but I always seem to have something on the go which is just like my mother - bleh.

It's nice to talk about it actually as DH totally does not get it and says just to stop thinking about it.

Hope Shannon feels better now, it's awful when they are ill.

Choc-You do sound really similar to me, I long for the day that I have nothing planned or needing doing, I always seem to have some drama or worrying about something. My mum has mental health issues too, although she wouldn't admit to it and I'm terrified I turn into her. I'm not sure exactly what the answer is, I suppose to take one day at a time, don't lie to yourself or others about when you're struggling and seek help. There is no shame in taking medication, if it's going to be a tool to help you manage then why not-as peole say, you'd take medicine for a broken leg etc wouldn't you. I like FT am happy for you to private message me if you want to chat

MMuppet-Hope the boy's chill out when DH comes home, sounds like you're all miserable and missing him. Hope his leg isn't as bad as first thought..

FT-Sorry to hear that mil forgets about Robyn, I suppose it's easier for her to forget than you iyswim.

Well Shannon has been ill all day and not eating, drinking or going to the loo, but she had a yoghurt mid afternoon and seems to have perked up a little, struggling to get her to eat but she's drinking watered down fresh juice now and playing with toys and her temp isn't has high as it was so hopefully she's through the worst. Actually she's just been for a poo and it really stank, kind of korma colour-better google, think it's a sign of stomach upset?

FT-I wish people we all lived closer too to help each other out. Having a stamp my feet day that I get no help and hating being essentially a single mum at the moment, am having to let dd1 walk home on her own from the school disco tonight as I can't take Shannon out really and still haven't packed for next week as Shannon wouldn't let me leave her. So much for getting some assignments done
On a more positive not I rung my tutor to say I may not make it in tomorrow and I've passed my exam from last week

Chocstar - just read what you've written and bells ring with me too. My mother had a mental break down after having me was in an institution etc etc. I often think this is the cause of why we just don't relate to each other ( I spent most of my early months with my grandmothers) but it could be that she's just a bit of a cow! Yes, mental health problems can be inherited but this is attributed to learned behaviour ie that you see the behaviour, it becomes normal and then you act like this in your own life. It isn't passed through the genes so you can learn to be different. My fear is also turning out like my mother/being like she was to me to my boys so I talk with dh about anything and everything to do with the boys. I ask anyone and everyone's opinions and then make my own decisions. I am similar to my mother but I am also a totally different person and recognise this so it isn't inevitable that I will become her.

If it is hard to talk to dh come and chat to us, we are more than happy to give help, opinions on anything or even if you just need to vent.

When you are with Dareh, is there anything specific that you are anxious about? Is it the same each time or do you become anxious about different things? I was convinced Ollie was going to die and that I would go to prison. Everytime I put him to bed I was convinced. I was also very preoccupied with how I felt towards Ollie. I felt I should be gushing with love but all I wanted to do was run away and this, in turn, made me feel worse as I knew it wasn't normal. I felt like I was suffocating some days. I couldn't see the woods for the trees, couldn't organise anything and I stopped going out, I avoided my friends and stopped answering the phone or looking at letters. My world became very small and I couldn't make any plans.

The ad's took the edge of the anxiety. It made me flat, made me almost a shell of what I really am but it did stop most of the anxiety and let me sleep. I felt that someone had turned off my racing mind. Yes I was numb but I was calm for the first time in ages. I could function just about. Once I'd started the psychology sessions things improved slowly but I learned a lot about myself and now use the strategies I learned in the sessions still when I have a 'moment'

My anxieties haven't really gone away, I still over worry about the boys , have awful moments if dh is late getting home as my mind races with different terrible things that could have happened to him but I can think my way round it which is something I couldn't do before.

Dh has phoned and they're all packed and ready to come home. He'll get back around lunchtime ready for me to take him to A&E! Hope it won't be a long wait...

You girls are fab you know. It's really nice to be heard if you know what I mean, makes me feel so much better.

I actually called my mum last night so I could talk to her which was daft as she does this thing where she just blanks you if you say certain things. So if I ask her for help then she will often just ignore what I have said. I told her I was feeling horrible with stress and she just says nothing. It's weird but she does it a lot and yet I still call her when I want support even knowing this! Crazy!

It's really helpful to read about your experiences too, sort of normalises what I am going through if you know what I mean. With the meds, I think it just feels like a step backwards. I was on them and in therapy for five years and then stopped both.

Muppet I do think you are right about a lot of it being learned. My brother struggles too and I am sure we are both just being the way that our mum was. I am just like you, terrified of putting Dareh through what I went through. I often get really anxious about something bad happening to him too. I used to be like that with DH but it settled so hopefully it will settle too. Work is very stressful, DH and I have been very up and down and the downs are pretty unpleasant although it seems calm just now. It just all feels too much although I did a mental house clean tonight and that seemed to help a bit!

Sorry I have gone all me me me, it's just a relief to talk about it without the fear of getting a negative reaction from DH.

Glad Shannon managed to eat. DH believes yogurt fixes everything so hopefully it will help!

Not been on for a while as Anya and I have been laid low with nasty colds, plus spiking temps in Anya's case. Hopefully we should get a good night's sleep tonight and I think we'll both feel more human. Although it sounds like all of us have had poorly dc's over the last week - sending lots of get-well-soon vibes to everybody.

Dal - so sorry this is late, but congratulations hun and welcome to the world Miles. Your dh's post brought tears to my eyes, he sounded so proud of you. Glad you had a quick trauma-free birth in the end. Awww at Dylan being so sweet with Miles.

trawberry - hope you enjoy your 2 weeks off work, how lovely just to be able to spend that time with ds. Hope you get to do lots of nice days out.

Inzi - sorry potty training has suffered a set-back. Next time you try it in a few months I bet it goes really easily.

Eva - have a wonderful time.

FT - lol at me installing drains, but I might yet be tackling the central heating. Actually, no, I am far more likely to find somebody else to do it - a step too far I think! Well done Thane at Crufts. Mothers Day weekend sounds wonderful - at Slatterys and all your lovely evenings out! Awww at Alex putting himself on the naughty step.

NC - well done passing your exam. Love your potty-training tips, will use those when I get round to doing it. Enjoy Guernsey this weekend.

BB4 - lol at 'naked naked baby'!

heartofglass - congrats on being pg - what a worry for you going through all the testing though - hope the haematoma clears up soon and everything progresses smoothly.. Hope dd is ok now as well.

Muppet - poor dh, and poor you while he's stuck in Geneva with Henry testing your patience. I don't have such a big problem with Anya - usually just the threat of me 'making' her do something is enough for her to do it voluntarily. 4 weeks for easter holidays is really long - is that Ollie and Henry being off at different times?

Alice - so sorry to hear about your friends, what a terrible thing to go through. I'm sure others will offer better advice but all I can think of is making sure they know you are there if they want to talk.

Chocstar - so sorry you're feeling so low. I think if you feel you need to speak to somebody you should get on a waiting list - definitely go and see your GP - I hope they are sympathetic and help you. Glad you're feeling a bit better tonight.

We've chosen a nursery for Anya - we decided on the small local one. She's starting after Easter so I've got a settling-in session with her in a couple of weeks, when I can stay with her the whole half day - I'm sure I'll feel better after that. Dal - yes, you're right, she will get a key worker and it's such a small nursery that everybody knows each other anyway, so there'll be lots of familiar faces really quickly.

Hi Inzi!

I love the fact that when we talk about anxieties/worries some us actually have similiar triggers...
It wasn't until I started being homest with other mums that I realised I wasn't alone and it is normal. What wasn't normal was the degree in which I worried and the fact it was interferring with my life.

To help with the dh being late problem. we sat down and talked about it. He asked what was going through my mind. I admitted (I felt stupid doing this) that it was how I would manage (money) where are all the bills to be paid, (I had taken a step back from financial things) what is our life insurance, where would I live? Oh yes, I had actually moved out in my mind
What we did was produce a document on the computer with all the names, addresses/contact numbers for all the bills, mortgage etc etc that I can go to in the event of an emergency. We have talked about what would happen should anything happen to me (he would stay here and employ someone) or him (I would move to a smaller house as I couldn't afford this on my own)

Sounds daft doesn't it?
But, we have had the chat. I have things in place to ease the anxiety and it does work. I don't stop worrying but I know things are sorted should anything happen.
---

I am very tired after the night from hell. Toby woke at 3 and promptly woke Henry with his crying. I fed Toby downstairs whilst Henry was crying which was quite stressful. I then put Toby to bed in the travel cot downstairs and went to see Henry. He was upset about spiders so I said I moved them out and he then wanted to come into our bed. I don;t like that as I don;t sleep and I don't have anywhere else to go and sleep (I ususally go in the downstairs room but Toby was in there) So I said, no, he had to stay there. Cue screaming at the top of his voice 'I WANT TO GO TO YOUR BED!!!' Which then woke Toby went to Toby and picked him up, he stopped crying so he was fine just that he'd been woken up so I put him back to bed and went to speak 'sternly' to Henry.

Nothing worked so I left them both to cry, this lasted about 15 mins and then it went quiet.

I am, needless to say, finding things really hard!!

I think I need to really knacker Henry out so he won't wake when Toby does (he doesn't normally just this week ironically enough ) maybe swimming may do it?

Sorry it's me, me, me.
Dh home around 12 and then I've to take him to A&E. Am hoping it's a short wait.

WWAJC - Nice to hear from you, sorry you've both had a cold. Nursery sounds great, I'm sure Anya will love it. Henry LOVES nursery and they've just employed a male assistant in Henry's room and he thinks he's fab.

Inzi - great news you;re feeling the baby move, my life hasn't time flown already!

Love to all
xxx

Morning ladies

Choc/Muppet-I have ridiculous feelings of worry too, the things I imagine if dd is a couple of minutes late or I don't hear from Rich when I expect too, I just try to think of other things most of the time, or take action to try and call them/go and find dd. Choc-
If it helps, my house is always here needing a good clean! I've just realised that Shannon had wee'd through my leather couch yesterday onto the floor, I realised she had wet pj bottoms but the couch wasn't wet so thought it was just a little bit, then realised she'd done it through the gap and there was a big puddle underneath

Muppet-Sorry you had such a crap night, I can't imagine what hard work it is having a baby and a toddler at the same time, there is no way that i could cope.

WWAJC- sorry to hear you and Anya have been poorly, hope the nights sleep did you the world of good and good news about the nursery. I'm sure she'll love it

Inzi-Glad you perservered with the training, she's a clever girl You may still have a few setbacks, but I reckon the worst part is over now. Awww at feeling baby, can't wait to find out the sex too, you need to post a pic of your bump so we can guess what it is

Alice-Asif any of us would think it was you! I couldn't think of anyone it could be from here.

Dal-You're delivery will be coming today, hope that you're in when it comes The courier woke me up yesterday when he picked it up, I was in a right daze!

Well Shannon was up at stupid oclock so yet again I'm tired, I did get an extra hour as DD took her downstairs for me, but I'm really struggling at the moment if i have broken sleep. She hasn't got a temperature atm but she's just had diaorea again and it really smells vile and she is so whiney, Rich was going to tske her to his house tonight so I could sleep/pack/do some college work and then we're meant to be leaving around 10 tomorrow to stay in Manchester and we fly Sunday, we're meant to be going to a chinese buffet and cinema in Manchester, but don't think it'll be a good ides if she hasn't perked right up, may have to do it where one stays with Shannon at the travelodge and the other one takes dd1. Am also contemplating taking a potty, not sure whether to pack it in hand luggage or suitcase... anyone else took one?

Right, it looks like she's going to fall asleep so I better try doing something.

hello all
just a quick update while i wait for the tea to cook.
chocstar - sorry you are feeling bad at the moment - i think the others have given you great advice. i was pleased that i did go & see the GP when i was feeling stressed and anxious - mainly because it made me feel that i hadn't been making up my feelings iyswim. I also managed to get some free counselling sessions through my work - i don;t know if your work has anything like that? My line manager (who's also a good friend) advised me about them, but you can ring up and book the sessions without having to tell anyone from work, if you don't want to.
Inzi/Alicet - well done on the potty training - i haven't attempted this yet, as DS is adamant that he doesn't want to wear big boy pants, and won't sit on the potty, so i figured there was no point in trying to make him. i'm going to get the pants out of the drawer and make them and the potty a bit more visible as a start...
NC - hope Shannon is better so you can enjoy your holiday
Muppet - hope DH doesn't add to your family stresses when he's back!
WWAJC/HOG/floria/dal - hello! And hello to anyone i've missed

Well, DS and I had a weekend away visiting my sister and then my mum, whilst DH replaced our bathroom. He's done a great job, i'm very lucky that he's so handy round the house. got a few more days visiting planned for next week - going to see some friends with kids so DS can play and I can drink coffee. Can't believe one of my weeks off has gone already!

Must go and finish the tea now, hope you are all ok

This thread is always busy, which makes catching up sooo hard

Dal - Hope the BF is starting to get easier and that you and Miles have settled into some sort of rhythm. BF was hard work for me. I was not successful with my first 2 DCs, but had some excellent support from our public health nurses (one in particular) with the last 2. I was able to BF Sofia for 10 months, and am going strong with Marco as well. Hang in there! And if it doesn't work out, you know you have tried your best.

Anxiety - I never had full blown PND with any of my pregnancies, but am convinced I had a mild case after Sofia was born. Looking back it seems obvious, but at the time, I wouldn't have thought it. What you all describe about worrying about your DHs if they are late, or worring that something will happen to your babies... all sound very familiar. Its not easy and you have to do what it takes to make you feel better. Muppet I love your idea about getting your financials sorted in order to relax. That makes a lot of sense to me.

NC - Hope Shannon is feeling better before you leave for your holidays.

Inzi - Glad to hear baby is making themselves known with all the kicking. I really miss that part of being pg. I cant believe you are 18 weeks already!! Why does it seem that everyone elses pg go by so fast when mine always felt like they were dragging!! Congrats on the perservering with potty training! Am very !! So far, Sofia just plays with her potty.

Muppet - Hope your DH heals up quickly. Glad he is home at last though. Its hard taking care of a baby and a toddler alone. I am lucky that Sofia usually sleeps through Marco's night cries... so does DS1 who shares a room with Marco Wouldn't know what to do if both babies were awake half the night!

WWAJC - Hope you and Anya are recovered from your colds/fever. Its hard to take care of sickly children when you yourself want to curl up in bed and sleep forever as well.

As for me... Sofia is being her usual handful. She was quite good at a play group today, even after one of the boys hit her over the head with a wooden moracca (sp?) I am glad she is not a clingy girl. She walked into the place like she owned it and started playing. Didnt look back to even see if I was still there! Her newest form of rebellion is yelling "NO" at me at the top of her lungs and then sticking out her tongue! I think I have to ban the watching of 'Supernanny' since she is learning a few bad habits from that show (my older DCs find it funny to see how bad the children are, then muse at what I would do to them should they decide to behave that way)

Anyway... off to make dinner. Hope you all have a wonderful weekend Hello to all I missed and xxx to all!

Evening ladies,

Just popping on to say you are all very naughty!

We recieved the wonderful parcel full of goodies you all sent today and couldn't believe your kindness and generosity... Dh and I are so touched by the gesture and were quite emotional to think that a group of people we have never actually met (well except alicet!) could be so kind

We really appreciate all the lovely gifts nd they will all come in so useful. The outfits for Dylan and Miles are adorable, the nappies are certainly needed (he poo's at least every time he feeds which is about every 2 hours at the moment!). The champagne will be well enjoyed . So many lovely things! Haven't decided what to spend the voucher on yet... The quilt is absolutely beautiful! I don't know how you knew but we use the boots own baby products already so they will all come in really handy. We really can't thank you enough, we can't believe how many different gifts there are, spoons, a bib, cutlery, wooden shape game, the list goes on. You have all been so kind and we thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

A special thanks to NC too for organising/sending the parcel, I thought the box look big and was heavy for a quilt!

The cards are lovely too, thank you all so much x x x

Glad you are happy with everything Dal!!

Thanks NC for organizing and doing such a lovely job with the shopping!!!

Hello lovely ladies,

Dal glad you liked the present - NC did a great job!

Choc sorry to hear you are struggling at the moment - think there is some excellent advice on here but just wanted to add my support x

Muppet you sound like you re having a very stressful time. Liking the financial plan! How are you going to manage with the 3 boys now dh is home but a bit incapacitated with his knee? thinking of you x

NC hope you have a lovely holiday - sorry to hear you're shattered and Shannon isn't herself.

Inzi great news on the potty training! Jane is a little star!

Hello to the rest to you - babyblue, strawberry, floria, WWAJC etc xxx SOrry I am a bit too wrapped up in my friends who lost their dd at the moment just can't really concentrate on reading through all the posts properly. Can't begin to imagine what they are going through and not being able to help (I am a bit of a 'fixer' in life which I guess is why I chose to be a surgeon which is the ultimate fixer isn't it ?!) is killing me. I do appreciate though that there is nothign I can do to make itbetter - I mean what could possibly make losing a child better? Just sending regular messages so they know i am here for them when they need it but trying not to be too intrusive

Glad you like the stuff Dalry, I second the thank you to NC - that was a lot of shopping!

Strawberry I hadn't though about checking work, there probably is something as I am with the council/in education.

Alice, it must be horrible to want to support your friend and not feel able to. I think you are doing all you can do, letting them know you are there for them but giving them space too. So often people disappear when you are having a bad time so I am sure your texts will mean a lot to them.

Running a tech rehearsal today, I can't get into the space until one but I want to go now! Too much to do in too little time.

Woo Glad you like them Dal, hope the tiny baby suit will fit Miles, it was so cute, it probably wont but I'm sure you can use them as dolls clothes if Dylan has a doll, or just change it for something bigger!
It was fab shopping for boy's stuff and tried to get them matching stuff as I can never get matching stuff for my 2, DD1 is too big or Shanonn is too little! How did the bf people go on Thursday? Hope DH had a nice birthday

Alice- I can't imagine how difficult it is for you wanting to help, let alone what your friends are going through. Could you maybe buy something to commemerate the baby, I know you can buy parts of the moon etc, can you buy stars? yes you canhere I'm sure there are other sites too. It may be an insensitive idea though... FT and Inzi, what do you think?

Choc-Hope the tech goes well, you're such a busy bee!

Hi to everyone else, have to go get ready for going away, Rich took Shannon to his house last night so I got a full nights sleep waking up worrying all night!

Love to all, don't let anything drastic happen whilst I'm gone! Unless it's winning the lotto or something, will allow you that xxxx

Glad you liked everything Dal ...

will try to post a bit while we're on Easter hols ... but you know how crap I am!

alice on potty training, for friend's loss - it's difficult to know how to support them

must go, am been thrown off computer by ds and his best friend who's sleeping over tonight (first sleepover for all of us!)