June 2008: New Year, new thread, new names, new words, new goals, but no resolutions!

[abdnhikinginawinterwonderland]

New thread since the last one's at 997 posts...

Tedi, you must be terrified. Statistically though, you are far far more likely to have a benign lump, or a blocked duct than anything sinister. I had to have an ultrasound for a lump in my twenties which turned out to be a fibroadenoma. It was smooth and slightly mobile. These are apparently fairly common and completely benign. I was a wreck though and absolutely terrified. Take care of yourself and let us know how you get on.

Hi guys, thanks for the messages. I am lurking as I am still feeling absolutely dreadful .

Tedi, so sorry to hear about the lump - would echo what others have said about 99% of them being nothing, but that doesn't stop the worry does it? Well done on you for even checking - I never check mine .

sybil, ouch about your dh's finger .

Rolf fingers crossed for a quick op. I had a vv treated a few years ago by injection which collapses the vein - has that been discussed as an option? Much less invasive - although it would give your dh an excuse not to look after the kids so perhaps forget it!

Right off to lie down again. Oh and if anyone can help with this then please do!

Tedi - how scary, hope you get to see someone soon and it turns out to be nothing to worry about.

Sponge - hope you start to feel better soon. What did you decide on the going back to work issue?

DG - Will keep my fingers crossed that you get another good nights sleep. I was wondering what had happened to puree as well, hello if you are out there!

Neenz - rubbish about the raging hormones, hope things settle down a bit.

Sybil - your DH's finger sounds painful, hope it doesn't turn out to be his knuckle.

Rolf - glad your hospital visit went well, it makes such a refreshing change doesn't it?

Amber - can you come and clean my oven for me, it was disgustingly filthy when we moved in here and although I tackled it a number of times when we moved in (so it's now usable) since I have been pregnant I haven't had the energy, so it is still fairly horrible and sometimes smokes.
Is Luke at nursery tomorrow? I'm sure you will soon get used to it.

Abdn - added you on Ravelry, Sponge are you on there? I tried to add some pics but it wouldn't upload for some reason, plus my stuff always looks rubbish in photos (but obviously great in real life )

I've finally packed a hospital bag today, I had a "helper" who went and fetched his 2 biggest teddies and put them ready to go with my bag, good job he was helping I would have definitely overlooked them. Also found him sitting in the pram attachment (which was on the floor) presumably checking it still works OK.
Chances are next time I turn my back for 2 seconds the bag will have been tipped out all over the floor and I will have to start again.

I'm getting a cold now and have an annoyingly runny nose, this is because I said to DH the other day that I hadn't had a cold for ages.

tedi sorry about your lump as that is terrifying. It could be a blocked duct - I still have mine (am on xmas card terms with the consultant now and think I should give it a name really).. as am wavering about getting the op done as dont fancy a spell with an open wound on my chest and a toddler. Apparently it can be quite common to come up well after you've finished b/f...

rolf glad you have got vv sorted and had quite a nice day -agree wtih sponge though that dh. And I look forward to the update tomorrow .

sponge hope you feel bit better soon. no food throwing here but food resisting again (its intermittent and I know she is hungry as will let dh feed her or vv if he is around) - I ended up doign a passable impression of one of the prison warders and emmeline pankhurst at supper which wasn't good. She was of course as happy after a few minutes of this...I am just trying to do the world weary ignoring ti thing and hoping we move on to some other way to assert her will. dh said both big kids went through battles at dinner time at thsi stage,

domestic puree ok but spd playing up/late pregnancy so I think she is resting as much as she can pre baby 2 arrival.

neenz you are right that statistically its something like 93% plus now and raging hormones/bump got to be a good sign!

Sponge - read your thread but no useful advice, we've had some food throwing here as well, luckily so far just handfulls, not the whole plate. No doubt I will have spoken too soon there!

Tedi - loads of good comments here about the lump and opssible blocked duct. I will keep my fingers crossed that is is something simple to clear up. I'm sure it is hun but well done for acting so swiftly.

Sponge what a nightmare with the eating. I can't help I'm afraid but it'll be one of those phases they keep getting into. This is such a cheeky age they are at now isn't it? Like ktpie and her LO using a chair to get an apple and the turning on of the fire. Luke now throws all his animals through the bars of the staircase and down the stairs (not that bad). He also goes into rooms and closes the door behind him and shouts no if anyone tries to get in (not that bad either). The funiest thing is when he takes Mark's hand when he is at his desk as if he wants to go for a walk and when Mark gets up he runs past and gets into his chair - again not that bad but you get my meaning!

ktpie- so cute with the teddies. Your little boys sounds like such a little character!

Rolf - brilliant that you've got your veins sorted so quickly.

Goddess, no projects planned yet. I have plenty to do round the house to be honest! I did enjoy weirdly the oven cleaning (but ktpie I'm afraid I draw the line at doing someone else's!!). Was just weird not having the monkey home today. Neenz I know how lucky I am but believe me I have had years of hideousness to deal with so figure life's handed me a good card at last. Will stop moaning.

I am on ravelry! Here! That has made me feel very nostalgic looking at my projects - my nn is keepsmiling if anyone wants to add me .

Thanks for the comments on the food - dh left him to eat without an audience today (obviously nipping in every couple of minutes but not actually sitting watching him) and he only threw his plate once! Making progress .

ktpie, have decided to put work plans on hold for the moment so I can think carefully about what kind of job I want to go back to. Dh is also looking for a new job so that will have an impact.

poppy, it must be so handy having your dh with his experience! At least you don't feel it's only your child!

Amber I hope you're feeling good about nursery today - I disagree with neenz about childcare. Because you can afford it, then if Luke's happy, I think you should give yourself the break for the IVF unless it is making you unhappy. Most of my friends who are SAHM use some combination of childcare just to make their week sane and that's without the added stress of IVF. (My friend who's going through IVF right now is having to take tons of time off work because she's finding it so hard so I'm getting a bit more of an appreciation for how tough it is on your body). I think it's lovely that you're missing him though - just try to remember how exhausting he (like Fraser) is!

Speaking of childcare, I'm actually getting a mother's helper . My friend needs a place for her 12 year old to go for a few hours after school one night a week (they live in the country and the school bus drops her off a mile from her house - not safe in the dark on country roads!) so her daughter is going to come here and take care of the boys and give me a chance to cook and clean. I've decided to pay her about £3/hour (I think that's fair - what do other people think?) as she's really good with the boys. She sees this as turning into a longer term babysitting job when she's older (so do I). While I'd feel funny just relaxing while she's here, it means I'll be able to relax earlier in the day while DS1 is at nursery and Fraser naps. Yesterday that hour of peace was wonderful!

Tedi fingers crossed and lots of hugs. My mother has regular cysts that aren't a problem so hopefully it's just something like that (or even more minor - she's had to give up coffee and I'd hate to do that!).

ktpie thanks for adding me on ravelry. I'm not uploading pictures there of all my garter stitch baby blankets but maybe when i get a bit better. I'm very tempted to try the owl jumper but I know it's way above me. sponge have added you as a friend.

poppy lots of battles at dinner time here too. DS1 still does this so between the two of them it can be a miserable experience but we're more able to ignore them now.

Really glad that you posted, Poppy (obv. glad that all of you post ) because I forgot (in my haze of panic) that you've had a blocked duct for some time now. I'm waiting for my referral for a scan now, and trying not to think too much about it but it's easier said than done really. Still breathing!

Will stop posting selfish posts now - sorry!

Hi everyone, sorry I've not been around. Mil went home yesterday, I've cricked my back and it's so sore so I can't get on with too many jobs whilst Ethan's asleep - what a shame a minute to MN!!Dh thought it was good of my Dad to apologise but hasn't replied to the e-mail, I've given my Dad my Mum's address as he wanted to put things straight with her from his point of view but now I think I shouldn't have done it and don't want to phone my Mum in case she's got a nasty letter off him and it will all be my fault!OMG families !!!

Ethan's favourite game at the moment is moving things around and hiding them. Recently I've found his cup in Grandma's wardrobe, a penny whistle and a book in the tumble drier, half his new tea set in the rubbish, dirty tea towels in a computer box, and a pair of his trousers shoved in a cupboard we rarely use! More and more things go missing every day!Could do with a hidden camera on him so I could find all the stuff at the end of the day.

Big boys have ski school this week with their school, they are in the same group so they will be racing against each other on Friday, I am expecting tears!

Tedi - hope all goes well with your scan, what a worrying time, hopefully it will be some sort of a blocked duct like Poppy says

Rolf, finger crossed that your appointment comes through quickly for your surgery. How did the Hernia appt go and how's your dd1 now? Any difference in her behaviour since the excitement of Christmas?

Sponge - hope you're feeling better today

Abdn - your Mums help sounds great and £3 an hour at age 12 sounds OK.

Amber - PLease can you come and do my oven too!!

Poppy - Ethan is really hit and miss with mealtimes(fortunately not literally like in Sponge's case)some days he eats really well others he picks and then piles his cup, spoon, fork in his bowl and prises it off the tommee tippee non slip thing and puts it on the table - that means "I'm finished - do not attempt to cajole me to eat any more of this"Can't believe you still have the duct problem - is it still painful?

Sybil - hope you're feeling better, how's your dh? We were just reminiscing about sausage casserole, can't get decent sausages here

Ktpie - love the description of your ds helping pack your bag. Ds1 loved trying out all the baby things when I was getting everything ready for ds2.

Goddess - thanks for asking about me, how was your night? Ethan has been sleeping terribly through the holidays until the last 3 nights then last night he was awake again and with my dodgy back and dh sleeping the sleep of the dead I just brought him in with me, back to square one I think!!

Neenz - how are you today?

sorry for the mammoth post

Aberdeen - thanks so so much for your post - it made me feel so much better as I think I felt guilty putting Luke in nursery when I could have had him at home and worry people might think I was cruel. Thing is he loves it and the house is tidy for the first time in ages . I feel much better about it now and have joined a really amazing gym and hopefully we'll have a thaw soon and I can ride my bike. By the way the mother's help is a great idea. I have no idea about money though. How much is pocket money these days? I used to get 50p a week and be grateful!

I have decided to hire myself out as an oven cleaner so if anyone wants me to do it then do make me an offer I can't refuse!

Tedi - I would be the same hun - it's easy to say try not to worry but you are an otherwise healthy young woman with no family history so statistics are very much on your side. Big hugs (oh and when are you next in London?)

Hi Deb - I do pity you with the back pain. Luke still wnats to be picked up all the time so if your LO is anything like him it must be a nightmare. I can'y believe the lack of sausages in Austria. I thought you'd have loads of choice (or is it the penglish ones you are after?). When I was a kid I used to love sausage casserole made with canned frankfurters!

I am so impressed with all the crafts - I am crapola at anything like that as I don't have the patience.

I love the stories about what our toddlers are getting up to. They are at such a funny age aren't they - proper little monkeys!

Hope everyone whose not well feels better soon. All the kids at nursery have colds so it's only a matter of time...

Glad you feel better today Amber. I'm sorry if I offended you, I didn't mean you are lucky so stop moaning, I just meant you have options, you don't HAVE to put Luke in nursery if it is making you unhappy or you miss him. I'm sure he does love nursery but I am sure he likes being with you more. I think would be more appropriate here [foot in mouth]

Debs, yes families are a minefield aren't they!

Still feeling rubbish, just have to keep eating.

Amber I think you are doing the right thing about nursery. I've always had some childcare when I've been able to afford. Best thing you can do for yourself

Deb poor you about the back. How miserable for you.

Tedi I won't say don't panic as i know I would panic, but like everyone else says it's overwhelmingly likely to be nothing bad.

The consultant said he would be happy to fix my hernia, but it would make sense to deal with the horrid skin at the same time and that's not something the NHS would do. Fair enough. He gave me the name of a colleague who does private work so I'll make some enquiries. i'd like to do the research, initial appointment, advice on risks, outcome, recovery, costs etc and then have a think about it. Maybe I'll never do it, or leave it till T is a bit bigger. But nice to feel I'm dealing with it.

Deb thanks for asking - I think DD1 is calmer and DH and I are both thinking that her teacher is being a bit hard on her. I saw DD1's old nursery teacher over Christmas, and she was upset for DD1. It was very reassuring actually, as this lady knew DD1 well at nursery and obviously saw her away from home.

Rolf - what's the skin issue? Glad to hear about DD1 and that your mother's instinct was right all along.

Neenz don't worry about it! Luke's got a cold now - the nursery called already and he's only on day 2. He may get to spend tomorrow with me after all...

Amber, lol at you saying you're crapola at craft - I was just about to suggest you take something up to deal with the stress of the next few weeks/months.

The more active/busy you can keep yourself in the run up to the cycle the better - but there will be times (esp during the 2ww) when you wont want to (or be able) to do very much activity-wise at all so my suggestion would be to join LoveFilm and order up all the films you wished you'd watched and never got round to! That's what I did and it was a sanity saver .

Feeling slightly better today but this virus has really taken it out of me. A back at nursery tomorrow (normality returns!) so more of a chance for a rest hopefully (M is a little better at sleeping in the day now after dh put Operation Sleep Baby into action over Christmas!).

Hi to everyone x

Oh God, Amber, I wish I hadn't posted that about DD1. She threw a huge tantrum in the school hall, in front of all the teachers . Inevitable or what!

The skin thing - brace yourself for grossness ladies - is hideous jabba the hutt loose skin as a result of pregnancy. The only way to get rid of it is surgery. It's just a cosmetic problem so I have no issue with the NHS not paying to have it fixed. But if I'm going to put myself through the rigours of surgery I bloody well want a normal-looking tummy at the end of it! There's an umbilical hernia but also the abdominal muscles are separated and I'd like to talk to a private surgeon about repairing the hernia, bridging the separated muscles, and getting rid of the loose skin, all in 1 op (ie a tummy tuck). I may not go ahead with it but I'll feel better if I'm a bit more informed.

tedi if yor GP has referred you for a scan rather than to the breast clinic, he must have a low index of suspicion about your lump. If they have any concerns they would usually refer you to the breast clinic, where they would carry out a triple assessment. I spent 2 years working for breast surgeons and seeing patients at these clinics, and i second what the others have said - the vast majority are nothing to worry about - I would often not see any worrying lumps in the clinic at all. It's always best to get these things seen though.

amber I agree with abdn, I would also be putting my LO in nursery in your situation, don't feel bad about it!

Will be back later, got to go and make tea.

Oh, I think I'm going to the breast clinic but he said scan and breast clinic. Just to make things better, I also had a smear test today! And I'm having a major work crisis with a deadline - quite dull but will keep posting to a minimum!

Rolf I had a student tell me about her tummy tuck recently. On the NHS as well. No, not an 18yo - she'd had surgery (inc. hysterectomy) and that had left her with lots of loose skin but I think it was NHS because they kind of did it - and no disrespect but I think you were responsible for the babies... No, seriously, she said it made a world of difference to her.

Amber I don't like long periods of time on my own with Iestyn - oh, that sounds really bad and not what I'm trying to say. I love spending time with him but it's good to have a break too. And both you and I have OHs who work long hours. I think you should take up knitting! It's not very hard (depending on what you knit, obv) and it's really sociable as well. And I've now got a hat I made myself.

Tedi no offence taken . Sitting at this hospital, in a poor part of Liverpool,the last thing I was going to do was start arguing with the consultant that the NHS should fix my tummy for me!

STOP THE PRESS!!! Send me to the G&T boards!!! I was told today that S is VERY advanced...

...by the dentist because he's got so many teeth at his age Who needs words eh? Hee hee, the GPs will be ridiculously excited - they're always going on about his teeth. He's got 16 btw if anyone's interested

In other news, my timberland boots arrived on Saturday but I wasn't happy with the fit so having to send them back. But thanks to ktpie I had a look on Amazon and found some luvverly Fly boots so got them instead. They arrived today and fit perfectly. Which made up for the fact I also found some gorgeous caterpillar boots too which were sold out everywhere (no doubt on account of the weather).

Rolf good news that you're feeling better about DD (despite today's events). Good for you on looking into sorting out your tummy.

I am very much regretting not taking action to find a new dentist sooner. I need lots of work done on my back teeth AGAIN which probably could have been limited if I'd gone at some point in the last 2 years. Actually, if I'd only told my old NHS dentist that I was pregnant when they announced they were going private I could have actually stayed on as an NHS patient till S was one. However, on the plus side, my new NHS dentist is nice, it's in a really nice area (which sadly I think can make a big difference in the standard of provision of NHS dental treatment) and it's a nice modern surgery. Their private work (i.e. the white filling I need) is pretty expensive though compared to others but hey ho.

Amber on projects... Do you have a gazillion digital photos of Luke on your computer that you've never printed? I enjoy uploading all my pics to photobox and making albums online which I can then buy (much less hassle than getting them printed and putting them in yourself). They can be pretty expensive, but I save them online until they have good deals - around twice a year they do a buy one get one free on albums. Last time I got two albums for about £40 that way - cheaper than the cost of having hundreds of photos printed and buying two decent albums. They're quite slim as well so take up a fraction of the space of regular albums.

But if you'd rather come and clean my oven that's ok too . Who mentioned having a dreadful oven? ktpie maybe? Did you know you can get professional oven cleaners. I'm very tempted to get one out for mine. I think it costs about £50 but well worth it IMO to get an oven as clean as brand new!

Thanks for the update on puree poppy - tell her I was asking for her.

Deb nice to see you back. Hope there's not too many tears at ski week. Thanks for asking about sleep - not brilliant last night unfortunately. But we exercised some neenz like discipline. He woke about 4am and DH went in on 15/20 min intervals. Just before he went in for a third time the screaming started to subside a bit (to some heartwrenching sobbing ) but he did get quieter and quieter before going back to sleep. It seemed better not to go in and stir him up at that stage so I think all in all he had us awake for about an hour.

Big hello to everyone else. I need to go and search for some suitable birthday presents for myself for various relatives who seem incapable every year of buying me something for my birthday!

That made me laugh DG! In that case J is very behind! I keep consoling myself that by the time he gets more teeth he will be very good at looking after them
Glad you managed to get some boots DG, I got a pair of these delivered today and they are very cosy (not that I ever go out now) and seemed like a good bargain.
Good tip about the oven cleaner, I think if I ever find the energy to tackle it again that might help or otherwise I could start saving up now for Amber's oven cleaning service.

Rolf - I think I will need a tummy tuck or something after this baby is born, I didn't think there was space on there for any more stretch marks but I was wrong, and they are all itchy and horrible at the moment.

Neenz - I'm still constantly eating as well, my top tip is a bowl of porridge mid morning otherwise I can't get to lunch time.

Deb - poor you with a bad back. J does moving things too, but once he has decided that he thinks something should live in a particular place it is replaced there every time you move it, which can be a bit irritating, although it makes it easier to find missing items.
J has made sure he has tested all the baby items out, he was running round sucking a dummy the other day and very pleased with himself, ironic really as he used to throw them away in disgust when he was a baby and we wanted him to have one! Had to move the bouncy chair because he was in danger of breaking it testing it out. I'm a bit concerned that him and his friend play a game of sitting on each other if one of them sits in a chair and they try to push each other out of it, hope that doesn't happen to baby in the bouncy chair.

Sponge - found you on Ravelry, anyone else on there? You'll all be converted to knitting in the end!

J has been a bit funny about eating today which is unusual for him but we both have colds and I have been feeling quite queasy all day so I think that might be the reason.

Goddess, that sounds like real progress on the sleep - one hour is not a lot really when you have just started. Next time it will be a lot less and then hopefully not at all!

Sitting on the sofa watching films sounds like a great idea. The 2ww must be so hard after IVF, it's bad enough when you are just generally ttc. Hope it's a successful one for you Amber.

Talking of teeth, how do you find brushing your LOs' teeth? I used to just give them a toothbrush with a dab of toothpaste on and they just used to suck on it really but now they have so many teeth do they really need to be brushing properly? And sometimes I forget, especially at night. E won't even suck on her toothbrush now, I basically have to pin her down from behind and force the brush in her mouth . But at least she cries so I can get to her teeth. T will suck on the brush then throw the brush in the sink, but when I try to pin him and brush for him he refuses to open his mouth. Is this enough or will their teeth rot?

The dentist certainly encouraged us to brush S's teeth regularly Neenz. We do his in the morning and at bedtime anyway. She suggested him having his own to chomp on and suck while we sneaked in and did the brushing. Although, have to say S is reasonably good at letting us brush away. She also said to check the toothpaste to make sure it's a 1000 ppm one and to replace brushes every 3 months (but more often if they get very chewed).