Nov 09 and we're feeling fine, feeding, burping, not enough sleeping - that's us!

[BeckyBendyLegs]

Just thought I'd better create a new thread.

Raggie how about a trip to Burford?

Ok so I went postal on my DH...he is off in Austria living it large whilst I'm stuck with a 2 month old who doesn't like sleeping and a 2 year old with a cold who coughs the whole night.. My mother is here but they need mummy when sick and when they want to go to bed don't they..i got 3 hours sleep last night... I hate men..why don't they ever feel the guilt or level of responsibility like mummies do..so i got the whole "my job is so stressful" chat after his boozy lunch on the slopes...RANT OVER!

Sorry folks..but i couldn't play the tough "I can do it" mum..

BBL sorry you've had a rough few nights and then some...i think they are all at a rough phase of growth spurts.

Scarlotti did the pump arrive?? i hope so! I posted it more than a week ago now.

Pav laughs at your huuby with x box and rocking bouncer trick..mine does the same but with the FT! wierdo

aww sleepless, you cant do everything. think you were perfectly in your rights to feel like that. I agree with you that men just dont get it and that us as mums seem to shoulder more responsibility. it is a hard job and it'd be nice if they could help us more (without having to nag first) sending you a hug.

first night leaving ds and dd with my mum tonight, as have a big family do (dh's side) to go to. there will be 60 of dh's relatives there, 52 of them i've never met before so will be a bit daunting. dh is really excited and told me this morning that he'll get to 'show me off' telling me i'll be the most gorgeous wife there. which is sweet, but definately biased. lol. more nervous about Belle being away from me over night though.
Bil will be there too, but Fil has said he will stick with us all night and if there is any sign of trouble Bil will be straight out of there.

anyone experienced with chickenpox?? DD2 has had a really temp, cold etc during week and now have a number of red spots - they are just on her face thought? is this pox? am i now captive inside forever?? will my baby - 10 weeks get it? is it serious??

BBL, I have those err-dur moments a lot. People keep asking me what the baby's name is and I have to stop and think about the answer.

I haven't been on much because DH has been in the US for the last two weeks so I've been playing single mother to two. DS 1 gets up at six and DS 2 goes to sleep at 9.30 and well, I get about twenty-five minutes of free time if their post-lunch naps overlap. When DH comes back, I am going to have a bath or shower all by myself, and it's going to be BLISS.

Haven't read through everyone but wanted to answer weston my 3 year old has just had chicken pox. Normally it starts wih a few spots on the chest and back, spots on the face and limbs usually come afterwards... but then thats just the theory mzybe some kids are different. It starts with just a few red spots, then loads more spots appear and the first lot turn into little blisters and final stage the blisters turn into scabs. My doctor said you can only really diagnose chicken pox when they have spots, blisters and scabs and until then it could be something else.

My LO has caught ot yet...incubation period is 2 weeks from appearance of spots so will be in the clear on tuesday (fingers crossed) If you re breastfeeding and have had chicken pox the antibodies can be passed on

Hope all that helps might not be too cler as i'm totally shattered after my first week back at work!

Right i'll go and try and catch up

weston what do the spots look like? are they small pinpricky and lot of them? Could be viral spots? Reuben has them for the second time. I thought the firs time they were just part of the other baby spots he had, but Dr took a look as they had spread to chest area and said they were viral spots, because, well because he had a virus! I hope she feels better soon.

sleepless it hasn't arrived yet, hoping it will soon. How long do parcels normally take?
Grr on your behalf about your dh, I'd be feeling exactly the same. My dh has gone for a few drinks after work - it started as just for an hour, and I've already had a text to say he's staying for a bit longer but not going to get drunk I'll go beserk if he comes home plastered and is a waste of space all weekend again. Am counting on him to look after Ioan this weekend so I can prepare for the interview and catch up on sleep.

BBL you sound like me! I can barely remember my own name most days - am terrified they'll ask me stuff in the interview on Monday and I'll just sit there going 'umm, ahh, umm..' !

trikken hope your evening goes ok and Bil stays out of the way.

scarlotti i hope he is home soon, but, its a friday isn't it? If he is anything like my DH, if he was in a pub at 8pm on a friday, he would not be home before 11pm and certainly not sober .

Reuben is unsettled today. He is a bit wingey. Think he is feeling a little off-colour. Is it ok to give calpol without a fever present? He is not really unwell, just has a cough, and is feeling sorry for himself, prefers not to be left in his rocker, wants feeding all day, cries if left, but then has moments of grinning and going 'goooo, 'huhuh' so not all bad. Just don't like him being anything other than happy!

Scarlotti if it doesn't arrive by monday I will try and track it.. I'm so sorry its taken so long. I asked for priority too...

Weston hope your lo is ok...what a mare to deal with Chicken pox. How is she now?

Trikken Hope all goes will at the party and that you are the "belle" of the ball..good luck with the whole BIL saga, but remember to enjoy yourself..

Pav he's not left the pub yet and it will take him around 45 mins to get home
Good job he's not got any responsibilities like ... say .. young children and a wife to take into consideration.
How long can someone carry on losing the will to live...?

sleepless I'll let you know if it arrives over the weekend.

Ioan has been unsettled today too, maybe it's something in the water/air? Am just glad he's asleep now!

sleepless, I really feel for you. I hope the next couple of days turn out to be better than expected and that you get some sleep.
My husband is going back to Austria for 4 days in 2 weeks because he has to celebrate Paula's birth with his friends. And I have to understand this . I will be all on my own and I'm not looking forward to it. It has never been an option to go to Vienna all three of us and to take it easy. Not to mention that I would like to see my friends too. It annoys me even more that they actually take Paula (and his best friend's new daughter) as an excuse to get drunk.

thanks for all advice, still can't decide if it is or not! the spots on her face are now more faded i suppose and she just got one new one on her arm, she is full of cold/fever/moaney and even naps on couch which is very very unlike her, was hoping for around 50 new spots so then at least i would know what it is!

DD2 is also full of cold..her 4th cold and she is only 10 weeks old...

Just checking in.. DH has been away this week and my feet haven't touched the ground. Hope all you ladies are having a nice weekend.

Evening all! Hope all is ok.

ursi men eh? DH felt the need to celebrate DS's birth several times, as some people could not make it! Nice for some eh?

scarlotti what time did your DH come home in the end last night/this morning? I hope it was a respectable time and he was not so drunk he was useless today.

All is fine here. I went into town with DD and DS in the pushchair this afternoon, on the bus, yes on a Saturday! crazy eh? Well DD was brilliant, she did exactly what she was told, and was fun and happy, no shouting or moaning with her.

Ursi boys don't need an excuse..I completely understand you view..it wouldn't occur to them to take a few days off and take it easy with their family.. I wish my husband would take a long weekend with us, it would be so nice..

I have decided to take a day off..just be and a book and starbucks..i think its time my dh realises what a day with the children entails. HAving a moment to yourself even if you're at work is bliss. At home I don't even get a 5 mins.

Hi all, hope everyone is having a good weekend.

sleepless going to starbucks with a good book is my idea of heaven at them moment, enjoy!

weston hope your dd is feeling better, if it is chicken pox at least you've got that out of the way now!

scarlotti hope your dh got back from the pub sober and at a respectable hour but if he is anything like mine that will not have been the case! Make sure you get him to look after the kids so you can have some chill time, hangover or no hangover!

Ursi I can't believe your dh gets to swan off and celebrate Paula's birth with his mates whilst you stay at home with the baby. Not fair! We do all the hard work and the men get drunk, I feel very on your behalf.

Dh is off on a work jolly in a few weeks and has informed me it will be a very late one. I've told him he might as well stay out as I don't want to be lying in bed wondering what time he'll get in, thats the worst part of them going out isn't it? Whenever I go out with the girls (which is hardly ever!) I always let him know what time I'll be in and am always home at a respectable hour. I think I'll get my sil over that night so we can have a girlie evening and she can help me with the kids (she is single and adores the kids and always stays here when dh goes away!)

Went shopping today and ended up buying more for the kids than for me, typical! Did buy a nice new top though and am back in my normal jeans so starting to feel less frumpy. Tamlin I think it was you who posted the tummy exercises, I have been doing them daily and my tummy is going down, albeit slowly, so thank you!

Dh is bathing ds, I can hear him having a massive tantrum (ds, not dh!) so think I'd better go and rescue him, or maybe not....

Tamlin and Fruit, well done for surviving so long on your own! Make sure you get a break now that your respective dh's are back!

Weston, hope dd is feeling better. Hopefully catching these colds early on might build up her immunity for when she's older??

Trikken hope you had a good time at the party!

Ds had his swine flu jab today and he was such a little star. All week he has been saying "Mummy, I want a vaccination"-obviously not having a clue what it is.

He was upset but he doesn't seem to like to cry in front of people he doesn't know even though he is only 2! His eyes filled up and he turned his face away from the doctor. In one sense this is good (or so dh thinks) but I don't want him to be afraid to show his emotions if he wants to. Does that make sense??

When I was putting him in the car he said "The doctor put some medicine in my arm" and I told him, yes, you were a good boy" and he said "Yes mummy, and then I was a wee bit sad" Bless him, could just eat him up sometimes! Thankfully he's been fine since, no side effects yet!

hi all,

hope your dd is ok weston.
Ursi it'd be nice if he gave you a chance to go out and enjoy yourself too.
sleepless that sounds like a brilliant idea, my dh only ever has both the children when Im having a bathe. It'd be interesting to see how he'd cope with having them both for a whole day. I dont think he'd find it as he imagines it is. hope you have a nice day!

The family do last night went well, not as many there as thought there would be but a good 40 people. had a good time but did miss the kids a lot.bil didnt cause any trouble either, which was good. also came home with the same amount of money as we went with as everyone was buying us drinks (only had one vodka and lemonade tho. the rest were soft drinks) which was v nice of them. and as fil organised it he gave us loads of the left-over food to take back which im not complaining about! dh loved seeing everyone and had a great time, which is what really counts.

Hi all. Sorry I haven't been around - have been feeling very very low for the past two weeks, and in the past few days have lost the ability to cover it up. Going to the doctors on Monday. My old demons are pestering me again. Currently trying to make plans for every possible moment - need to keep busy so I don't have time to think.

Bryn's teeth are starting to cut through the skin, he's a very unhappy little thing right now, and my nipples are killing me. However, he is sleeping rather well, so trying to focus on that.

Will try and catch up with you all soon. Hope you're okay.

Pav dh came in around 11 and went to bed. Has been up and helping out today

TOK your Ds is so sweet!

Trikken glad the do went well.

Erika sorry to hear you're feeling so low. I have an interview Monday but once that's out the way I'll text and see if you're free to meet up

We went out for a few drinks tonight and it was really nice, met up with some friends and spent a whole 2 hours in the pub! There's a whole other world out there

Erika big, big, big hug to you. Keep busy, keep positive if you can. That's how I get through the days at the moment.

Erika I hope you're ok. Have you been in touch with your HV or anyone else who can help? It's bloody had work being a mum. I think it actually gets harder around now before it gets easier - you're over the high of having a newborn baby; people stop fussing over you and offering so much help - their lives seem to go on as normal while yours has never been more different; all the sleepless nights accumulate, so that even once you start getting a bit more sleep, you're more tired than you've ever been... This is just my experience anyway, but it will get easier, I promise.

As for me, I think I might be nearing the end of my breastfeeding journey... I am unbelievably gutted about this but I am finding it so hard and painful I don't know if I can carry on any more. I took James to A&E yesterday as there was blood in his sick. It looks like it was just from him swallowing blood from my nipples. I hadn't known they were cracked, so felt pretty stupid, and then quite sorry for myself. The doctor sent us home saying the only reason for concern would be if he threw up a large volume of blood or had black poo (which would be caused by a large volume of blood) and how unlikely this would be. So, at midnight he did a poo and, of course, it was black. We have to go back in this morning to get him checked over again.

helips I totally agree the worst part about DH is lying awake in bed wondering when he'll be home and if he'll wake me up (of course he will). A few times I've persuaded him to stay with friends instead and it's been much better and I get a proper night's sleep. At the same time I feel like encouraging this is just reinforcing that he can totally rescind all parenting duties when he wants to go out and get wasted.

TOK your DS sounds gorgeous!

OOps meant to say 'the worst part about DH going out'

Thanks for all the nice messages about my husband leaving me alone in London for a drinking weekend (I might start talking about it again in 10 days)
I also know the feeling of wondering when he gets home and not wanting him to wake me up or even worse, drunk stupidly offering help with the baby at night. So, he is usually sleeping on the couch in the living room when coming home late and this quite helps me as at least he doesn't annoy me and most of the time I don't even wake up. I can only recommend this system as the next day he will have to wake up more or less early (I don't mind him suffering) and at least be able to help with certain things)

TOK, what a sweet boy. But I can understand that you want him not to be scared to show his emotions. At least he shows them to you.

ursi yes DH gets relegated to the sofa as well if he has been out on the sauce so i can get my own back by having dd bounce all over him really early so he does not disturb me!.

erica i second what laugs has said about this part being the hardest, when the support drops off yet the work is harder as people carry on with their lives/the novelty of a newborn has worn off, along with the disappearance of those hormones that make no sleep easier to manage. But do remember you are doing this, and doing it briliantly, like everyone on this thread.