June 08- the shoes, the food, the glamour!

[pureeandpearls]

Struggling to load pages these days and saw we were over the 900 so took the liberty of starting a new thread.

Wow - the thread has gone politics mad! I cannot really comment on owt as I am a righty and I'm not sensing many others here. I imagine people would think my views were borderline fascist !

Aberdeen - how is the litte one today - a bit sore? So glad it's all over and went well.

I can't get an appointment to get my test results earlier than Monday as it's a sopecific doc I need to see. Can't remember who asked by it's my fertility hormones that were checked. Maybe it's just policy to come in and maybe they might be normal but they need to work out what to check next?

I was thinking about potty training but I thought 2 was when people started. Luke doesn't know what poo and wee are yet so better wait until we can have more of a chat about it I think.

Oh and the root canal thing was horrid but mostly because I had my gob open for 1.5 hours. I had 12 injections! It's not over yet as I now need to go back in a month for a crown. £700 for the root canal and £500 for a crown - that's a month's wages!

I have two potties and Toddlypearls loves sitting on them fully clothed....have yet to take the next step. In no rush to train. Plus will be easier in summer as less layers to remove!!

Abdn- glad to hear it's all over. How worrying! I confess I sat and sobbed a the bottom of the stairs last night whilst someone else put the Toddly one to bed as I couldn't manage the stairs. I can't imagine what you must have felt like (((hugs)))

Debs- seems there's an upside t the shoe incident ;-)

[waves to all]

Amber, if it's your fertility hormone results then I really wouldn't worry that you've been called in - I was always expected to pick mine up from the doctors. If there is a problem they'll want to discuss options (clomid poss?), if not then they will still need to talk about possible next steps if you're still having problems conceiving.

Puree, horrible isn't it . Dh has been doing all the bathing and most bed times for weeks now and it's really sad that I can't get involved in this fun time anymore. But it won't last forever. Are you getting any help with the SPD?

ktpie, I wouldn't be in any rush at all to worry about potties with a new baby on the way. Boys generally train later than girls anyway, and it's not uncommon for siblings to want to be back in nappies when LOs arrive. My mum had trained my sister before my twin brothers arrived, but seeing that me and the boys were all having regular nappy changes she promptly went back into nappies!

sybil, A doesn't say a word either - well not an intelligible one!

Sounds like next summer might be the time for potties then, good, one less thing to worry about!

Amber - root canal sounds horrible, and expensive.

Sponge - how are you doing? Still taking it easy? How is your BP?

Puree - SPD sounds horrible, how many weeks are you now?

J doesn't really talk either, lots of gabbling. He did pick up a toy mobile at baby group this morning and do a fairly legible "hello" into it.

My friend is on her way round for a cuppa so looking forward to that.

With potty training I think it is like feeding themselves - the longer you wait the more ready they are going to be. When they start realising that they are having a wee or a poo, that's a starting I point, then I think you just have to have a few days where there are no nappies at all and they will have accidents of course but they will learn quickly - that's why summer is a good time so I am with Sponge, I am thinking next summer at earliest. When we have nappy off time before bath sometimes they wee or poo (yuk) on the floor and I always say 'you're having a wee/poo!', E sometimes gets upset and T can actually stop himself mid-wee when he sees it coming out! E can say poo but only repeating me - they don't seem to know what they are doing yet.

Sponge, interesting about the twins wanting to go back to nappies when you came along - that makes a lot of sense really and shows there's no point rushing it.

Abdn, great news about Fraser, glad it all went well and you can relax about it now.

E has learned to say Theo - or 'Mweo' as she calls him!

Amber, lol at borderline fascist! Perhaps we can turn you .

I am not at work today so will post less which I am sure you're all glad of! Just one last thought on Labour and the election - when the Sun backed the Tories yesterday they identified a few areas where Labour have 'failed' - one is yobs on streets, the other MRSA and another equipping our troops and others but can't remember what they were! But anyway, what I thought was Labour have lost their way a bit by not sorting out the absolute fundamentals. When they came in they tackled the NHS head on by investing loads of money and the NHS is 100 times better than it was now. They need to sort out the really important things - I agree with ktpie that the VAT cut was stupid!

neenz think Amber is more likely to turn me away from my leftish roots

toilet training we waited until DS1 was almost 2.5 and it was really straightforward. I'd definitely recommend not rushing it! I've no plans to even bring out the potty until next spring at the absolute earliest and even then it would just be to use as a chair...

Thanks for the potty training advice - I won't worry about it for a bit then. Deb your story of Stefan is sooo funny. Poor little thing. Puree - I see your point about summer being easier, which means if NZ goes to plan I'll start worrying about it this time next year.

Got my redundancy paperwork today. As silly as it sounds I was walking round the shops today looking at Xmas stuff in a daze because I won't be here then.

DH sent me off to the cinema this afternoon as a treat (had smear this morning). I went to see Dorian Gray and it was so much better than I expected although the ending was a bit quick. Lead was yummy! I was gutted 5 mins after the film started and someone else came in, I thought I was going to have the cinema to myself.

Sponge - LOL at your rash being insect bites.

Puree - Have you decided on a name?

Bumped into Needahand on another thread and she seems to be getting on well.

Mweo is lovely, can Theo say anything near Esther? (Am I right in thinking that Esther usually hits development stages just before Theo?)

DH out for the night so looking forward to painting my nails and reading a book - after going through a box of clothes to be chucked out...

E is much much better at talking than Theo - he doesnt really have any words, he says da da for 'down' and mama (to me) but not much else yet. Esther can't say her own name but today she kept saying 'peter' 'peter' - my DH's name! I'm not sure if that was what she was trying to say but at bathtime she kept saying it to him as well .

Abdn, lol at turning from the left. I totally feel for you cos when you are earning in the 30-40k range you really get caught in that trap of being not very well off but too well off to receive any help . Labour really need to sort that out but it is like BG hates people in that bracket - but doesn't hammer the rich! Ridiculous .

I also really laughed at Sybil and Debs' kids saying they couldn't look after another baby!!

Amber hugs about the dentist bills too - it's so horrible! We went yesterday and I found myself crossing my fingers since I haven't budgeted for extra costs. We snuck through this time though.

We're going to be crossing our fingers and doing a pregnancy test in a few weeks time - I forgot to take my pill last night because I'm sick with a sore throat. For us it'd just be the financial panic - we really can't afford another kid - but the chances are slim, it's not like we're having a ton of sex these days (not in the past two nights so I think that means we're okay).

How can my tooth still hurt when I don't have any nerve in it?!

Oh I got myself into a right state this morning. I took Luke into nursery and there were hundreds of black taxis with balloons on them. It turns out they are taking disabled and life limited children to a trip of a lifetime to Disneyland of course I burst into tears in the middle of the street! Then when I got home they all drove past me with the kiddies in them - after every ten or so there was an ambulance. Started me off even worse than before. I've only just calmed down. I get super emotional at anything like that these days.

Gave notice at Luke's nursery today. I will probably cry on his last day too. I am a complete wuss.

Aberdeen - seems weird for me to say fingers crossed you are not preggers!

Mar and I are off to the OXO tower for dinner tonight. I have bought a skirt to wear - a skirt! Me! I'm even going to get my hair done. Poor Mark will get very excited I know but unfortunate timing with 'monthly friends' staying over

Amber- it would have me blubbing too (((hugs)) [also for the tooth thing] but hope you have a lovely evening. DH and I went on our second date to Oxo Tower- walked back to Waterloo station hand-in-hand and he kissed me whilst we were sitting in the Hole-in-the-Wall pub outside the station. Not a terribly glam location but very romantic evening ;-) If you can't have sex at least you can have romance!!!

Do you have a move date yet?

Sorry, Penguin- you asked about names. Dh announced the other day that he's waiting for the scan before making a decsion (we're going to find out what we are having) when I thought we had names sorted. Current favourites are Theodore (Teddy) and Violet (Vivi) but don't hold your breath! If you move to NZ before March then you'll have to tune in to find out!

Amber you're pulling Luke out of nursery? What are your new childcare arrangements? Is it somewhere closer to your new house?

I still don't have a completion date - we haven't even exchanged yet - and this is 5 weeks after agreeing the sale. Luke has to leave his nursery and join a new one in Beckenham where we'll be living. It's very sad as he is so happy there but I can't keep him here as it'll be too far away. The new one is also 50% cheaper.

Puree - love the names; Cecily and Theodore - wow! Hope it's a boy so you have one of each.

Oh and it is normal to get pain after a root canal - just spoke to the dentist.

cheaper is good - hopefully he'll be just as happy there!

Amber - buying and selling houses always seems to drag on, ours wasn't helped by having inept estate agents who overcharged us. Hope it all gets moving, literally!
Night out sounds lovely, seems like a long time since we have done that sort of thing!
I keep getting super emotional as well, news stories seem to really effect me, I keep having to switch the news off.

Puree - you are so organised with the names! When is your scan?

Penguin - BBQ for Christmas for you!

Hello everyone else!

Aw, Amber I would have been emotional too. Enjoy your night out!

I was a bit emotional at playgroup this morning as well (but I am pre-menstrual so hopefully it is just that). I just felt a bit lonely, I have met quite a few women at playgroups and people are quite nice but they never seem to express any interest in meeting up outside of playgroup. I think one reason is because they are all from here so have lots of friends from way back, so they don't need any new friend iyswim, whereas I really don't know that many people. Sometimes I just want some friends who I can text and say 'fancy meeting up this afternoon', but sometimes it feels like people are being a bit rude and I don't want to 'force' myself on people if they are not that interested!

I think I had this idea of what motherhood would be like and how I would meet all these mums and we'd become friends and it hasn't really worked out like that . Then I worry it is me and they just don't like me .

Hi all
neenz - just wanted to say I can completely empathise with where you're coming from. When I go to soft play places it always feels like everyone in is pairs or groups, and I'd feel such a saddo trying to talk to them. I have chats with other mums at swimming, but I don't think I'd have the courage to ask about meeting up outside - I've always been rubbish like that though, I think I assume that they wouldn't be interested and think it's strange I'd asked. So hard. I really think I should make more of an effor, but I don't know how, ikywim

penguin - it must be really weird for you to know that you won't be here much longer, but exciting at the same time

amber - I can imagine how emotional it will be with luke's last day at nursery. If he took to this one so well so quickly (as I remember) that's a good sign that he'll be likely to settle elsewhere also. And he's used to the whole nursery way of going as well, so that's good

needahand - that's a blast from the past

Did we ever figure out where rolf is?

Neenz - you know there are probably so many other women wo feel exactly the same. I know I do - which is probably why I was so keen to get back to work.Working three days a week means I only have 2 days on my own. Wjen I first had Luke I put note on our community website (for the develoment where I lived) asking for other mums to go for walks and coffee and I had a few responses. Now I've moved away and i know we won't keep in touch so I have to start again in my new place. I am going to try though as it is great when there is someone nearby that you can just go to the park with. At least you have 2 kids. It's worse with one as the pressure is on you to entertain them constantly.

Allnew - I agree - I think Luke will be fine eventually as he has that kind of disposition (all the other kids at nursery know Luke's name)but I know there will be teething problems at first.

neenz I think you just need to try - I met my closest friend just by asking her over as her son was playing nicely with DS1. Turns out we get along really well and she's a wonderful support for me! Lots of women are probably looking for friends but too shy to propse getting together.

But there's been lots of false starts too - times when it doesn't work out. You just need a thick-ish skin and keep trying. I'd say for every four mums I've met up with once, I am friends with one of them on a weekly basis. I like to have a friend a day that I can meet up with (scheduling around part time work patterns, school etc gets complicated). I don't see everyone every week, but most weeks I have two or three playdates/tea breaks!

It is hard, I just suggested a play date to a mum at the school gate and I'd been waiting for the right moment for weeks....

Hi everyone. Just marking my place. Feeling a bit fed up as DH is away (sorry, I know many of you put up with that a lot). I'm not very good on my own.

Neenz I agree that there are probably loads of mums in the same boat. I've really tried to make the effort and I've got a few mum pals now, but it's taken a while to get past the endless discussion about 'what's's your baby doing, mine's doing this'. Keep at it!

Right need to go sort dinner, will no doubt be back later

Thanks so much for your messages, they made me cry (again). You're so right about trying and trying again... there is one woman I have really clicked with, her little boy was born two weeks after the twins. But she works four days a week and only has Wed off -one of the days I work! Grr.

But we are going to go out for a drink one Friday night soon, so that will be good. I think I felt down before because of PMT (or perhaps pregnancy?) but sometimes you get that way don't you. I am enjoying a nice big glass of wine now . DH has gone out on a works do and I got the kids in bed by 6.30 so I am enjoying some alone time now .