October 2007- These Little Piggies started throwing tantrums

[FloriaTosca]

The lastest thread for the fabulous women who were due their babies in the October of the Chinese year of the pig and who now have terrible tantrums and delightful cuddles in equal measure from their almost 2 year olds. New and old members welcome to drop in for a chat anytime....

just a reminder

TLES - Zachary 18/09
FloriaTosca -Alex - 26/09
CrochetDiva - Mairwen - 01/10
LLL - Ben 05/10
NC-Shannon 05/10
Strawberrylace - Olly 5/10
WWAJC - Anya 07/10
Stefka - Dareh - 21/10
EveLongoria - Aaliyah - 28/10
Dalrymps - Dylan 30/10
inzidoodle - Jane - 03/11
Muppetgirl ? Henry- 05/11

NC - lol at your post - have you recovered yet?

LLL - photos on fb are wonderful - cake looks amazing (as always!)

Loving all these cute quotes .

Happy belated birthday to Dareh too. Hope you had a wonderful day.

Eva - how you coping?

Actually dh and I are going through a worse than usual bad patch. Not sure whether we'll survive or not. Not even sure whether I want us to . Don't really have the energy at the moment to go into detail - feeling very drained these days - but I know you're all here if I do .

Now back to work...!

I'M BACK!!! My laptop is working again, for now!

I've missed you all...

Off to catch up

Good idea LLL

WWAJC-Sorry t hear about you and DH, hope you manage to sort out what is best for you and Anya, can so relate to the too tiredness-I'm feeling really insecure atm withn Rich, don't know if its me or him, but the arguing and constant going round in your head is exhausting

Eva-Thinking of you also.

FT-Hows your fab garden looking? Is Alex completely potty trained now? Do you use normal pants on him? I've been looking at reusable trainer pants as Shannon will use the potty when bare bottomed all day but as soon as she has a nappy or pants on she forgetsis lazy.

Hi Les, won't be able to make your party I'm afraid, don't think I'm going to be up to much that weekend tbh.

Dal-Hows Dylans eating coming on? Have lost the other thread off my list so don't know if you're updating on there or not. Is it your scan soon? You finding out the sex?

Inzi/Alice/Crochet/Everyone else that has better things to do than MN-hope you're all okay!

I've just been to get some windscreen wipers for the car, both the front ones are different sizes and so's the back one grr so just bought a packet of the squeaky one, can't work out how to fix it on though
Needed to get them sorted for tomorrow night as we're going ot a Haven site near Mocambe/The Lakes for the weekend, straight after I finish college I need to get back, pick Leonie up, load the car, make some pasta for tea to eat on the way, go to pick Rich up and then drive for over 3 stupid hours to get there, we usually go places in Richies car but its not working properly, and he's not insured for my car. Going with my Dad and his partner and my DB and SIL, who is 22 weeks pregnant so obviously needs the double room, so I think we're going to be sleeping in the living room So glad that I did all the arranging and paid for it most and I don't even get a bedroom!(wouldn't normally mind a pg woman having whatever to be comfy but she moans about everything and really gets on my nerves)
Anyway-need to pack and go to dentist, parentsa evening and get the house cleaned cause I'm going for the op the day after we get back, so better get off here and get on with it!

x posted Dal, wondered where you'd been

Hippo Bird Day Muppet!!!! Have a lovely day.

WWAJC Oh No! I can't say how sorry I am to hear your feelings atm especially the "not even sure I want us to" comment...of course we are here for you if/when you feel like venting/bouncing ideas, you know my number and where I am if you ever want an ear/shoulder...
but it is no wonder you are feeling drained; it isn't easy holding down a job and being a mum to a toddler, adding 'wife' when things aren't going smoothly into the equation makes everything terribly hard work ...
the only thing I would say, is that when things were not at their best for Dh and I earlier in the year, I kept reminding myself of a quote I read when getting cold feet before we married, (I'm sure I've used it here before so please excuse me repeating myself), a woman married for over 50 yrs said that over the years she had "fallen in love with her husband many times over", suggesting that she had also fallen out of love a similar number of times.
I dearly hope you find the right solution for you R and A and feel more energised with life soon.((((hugs))))

x-posted Dal and NC

Dal; so glad you have your laptop back. Hope Dylans eating has continued to improve. After several weeks of good appetite we have resorted over the last few days to bribing Alex to eat more than a mouthful...so as well as choosing which train each forkfull is (Thomas/Gordon/Percy etc)we have to say things like "3 more mouthfuls and you can go and watch Roary/Thomas " etc.

NC;Sorry to hear that you are feeling insecure with Rich too..like wwajc I think you are expecting a lot of yourself wearing so many hats and esp when you are not enjoying your course.I hope the caravan is more spacious and comfortable than you expect and things are more restful/enjoyable than you expect.

That quote is good FT, makes you think at least, I agree about the hectic life thing, still holding out for a easy peaceful life-wonder if it'll ever happen, time to enjoy things-like fish and chips or reading a book, or even going for a meal, at the moment I'm so pent up with things I don't enjoy anything, except alcohol!
Hope Alex eats properly again soon.

Muppet-Am I right in thikning it is your birthday? If so Hope you're having a good one!

Think I've nearly got things organised for tomorrow night Oh am on day 4 of stopping smoking again

Just popping by to say - Happy belated birthday to Dareh!

And hello to everyone. Hope you are all ok - sorry to hear that some of you are going through sticky patches, and hope you get those sorted out xx

Off to my mum's with DH & DS for the weekend - hope the weather's nice as DH is supposed to be mending my mum's shed roof while we're there

Happy birthday muppet!

WWAJC - so sorry to hear that things are not going well for you and your DH. I hope you are taking good care of yourself and you know where we are if you want to talk.

Hope you have a good break NC.

Can't believe Dareh is two. I didn't see him much on the day as I had to work until nine - parents night. But we are taking him to the theatre on Saturday and I am so excited! Also I felt happy thinking about the amazing day this time last year when the postie turned up with bags and bags of gifts for my boy. Makes me teary just thinking about it now - it was like something out of a film and I will never forget it.

NC - sorry you're having rough patch with Rich. Hope things get sorted out soon. Hope you enjoy your weekend away - I'm not surprised you're exhausted! And good luck with the not smoking - fingers crossed for you - trust you to pick a stressful time to do that though!

Sorry to be down - I'm not feeling tired because of the working mum thing - in fact that side of things is much better with my new job as I can just do my job in the office and not have to worry about it at home. I'm feeling emotionally drained after the latest confrontation with dh a few days ago - I feel like I've battled so hard over the last 2 years to try and keep the marriage going, mainly for Anya's sake, but it's occurring to me now that maybe it's worse for her if we stay together than if we split. At best we can manage to be civil towards each other - at worst it's open hostility/tears/anger/misery. We agreed a sort of truce this time but I know the underlying problems are still there so it's only a matter of time before it blows again. Even so, it's hard to get my head round it all. FT - thanks for the offer, and yes I've thought about that quote - it would be lovely to think that could apply to me and dh but I fear we're past that point.

Oh WWAJC, I'm so sorry, all I can say is that I second FT, and hope you know that we're here for you no matter what you're going through, so know you can come on just to vent x

WWAJC, I hope you can resolve things....and well you know there is only one person who can truely tell you what is for the best and that is you......keep your chin up, don't rush anything and don't ignore anything....xx

WWAJC;I'm am so close to tears reading your post, knowing what a positive person you are but reading such a defeated sounding post from you I understand how bad things must be. This is so tragic for all three of you. I'm so very, very sorry. I hate state the obvious but have you thought of councelling to try to resove the underlaying problems?... I won't keep repeating the offer, it is there for you any time you want...open ended...((((hugs))))xxx

Morning ladies,

Floria - Aww at Alex saying 'Hello Daddy! It's Alex!' sooo cute

Sorry he's going through a bit of an eating strike, I feel your pain! I'm sure it'll pass soon, it's quite common for 2 year olds to be up and down with their eating..

NC - Hope you start enjoying college soon and things calm down generally for you in what seems to be a pretty hectic/stressful time for you at the moment...

Good luck with quitting smoking

Sorry you're going through a bit of a rough patch with Rich, hope it settles down and you both feel happier soon.

Hope you have a nice break away and that the sleeping arrangements don't get too annoying.

Dylan is still doing well with his eating, some days are better than others but overall he's eating more than he was. Only thing is he is exactly the same weight he was before we started the 'experiment' so that's stressing me a bit. Will just have to play it by ear, can always change the milk to jersey milk and see if that helps. I hope this works out because one thing dh and I have realised through doing this that we really don't want him to go back on the hi cal milk, we can now see it definately affects his appetite and feel it's just a short term 'sticking plaster' rather than a long term fix. If he's ever going to progress with his eating and if his appetite is ever going to increase he has to be off the high cal stuff we feel...

Stefka - Sorry I missed Darehs birthday.

So.. Happy (belated) 2nd Birthday Dareh!

Hope he had a lovely time.

Aww at him saying 'switch the boo boo off' they're saying the cutest things at the moment.

Les - Lol at Zachary watching 'depdoe'

LLL - Love love love the cake you made! Wish I had more cake making knowledge.. I've ordered a 'Handy Manny' lazy cake topper for Dylans birthday so I can just buy a round cake and stick it on. Usually I would attempt to make it but we have a busy week ahead!

We're off to my nieces christening in P'boro tomorrow till mon/poss tues. Really looking forward to it as I get to see both my bros and sils and of course my niece

Then it's the 20wk scan on wed, am hoping to find out the sex, eek!

Then Dylans bithday fri

WWAJC - I'm so so sorry to hear things are going so badly at the moment . All I can say is we're here for you whenever you want to talk it out. You're a wonderful mummy and i'm sure whatever you decide you'll always have Anya as your main priority. ((big hugs))

Strawberry - Hi! Hope you have a nice time at your mums and the weather stays fine for you!

Muppet - Sorry I missed your birthday too...

Happy (belated) Birthday Muppet

Well, i'm just trying to get some clothes washed and ironed so I can finish the packing. I just want the packing done so we can relax tonight but there's always stuff you can't pack till the last minute!

We got my niece a lovely music/jewellery box for her christening present and a necklace . The jewellery box has an 'owl and the pussycat design on it and they are inside in a pea green boat that twirls round. The necklace is a silver flower on a chain with a tiny diamond in the centre, diamond is her birth stone... I'm pleased with the gift and can't wait to give them, quite happy I managed to think of something to get as I was struggling for ideas...

I put 2 new video's of Dylan on fb if anyone fancies a look

Hi to everyone i've missed, hope you're all doing ok x

WWAJC - sorry you are having a bad time of it at the moment but I am a firm believer in not staying together for the sake of the kids, as they will pick up on any tension as much as you try and hide it. I hope you find a conclusion soon, and has been said we are all here for you to vent.

NC - same goes for you, good luck on the smoking front but that must be making things doubly stressful so don't be too hard on yourself. Hope you have a lovely time away.

Dal - How exciting finding out the sex, I hope he/she is in the right position for you to find out :D

Hope the christening goes well and those gifts sound lovely, I'm sure she will love them

Muppet - Happy belated birthday, hope you are coping ok with all those boys!

Hello to everyone else.

Thanks for the supportive messages. I've been thinking a lot over the last few days - I've resisted the idea of us splitting up for so long but now I've started to consider it, it seems like the right thing to do. I feel very guilty about the effect it will have on other family/friends though - they've already had to support dh through one marriage break-up. Anyway, I've decided not to do anything just yet - we have a calm patch at the moment, which might last for several weeks, in which case I wouldn't want to break up over Christmas if possible for all sorts of reasons. So this might all go quiet until new year. Or a miracle might even happen in the meantime. FT - have suggested to dh about counselling but he won't go.

Dal - glad that Dylan's eating is better - I think you are right about the high cal stuff. Try not to stress, he will get there in the end - sounds like he's making such good progress. Hope you are enjoying your weekend in Peterborough - the present sounds lovely. Can't believe it's your 20 week scan already - how exciting!

Is it just Anya or is anybody else's dc obsessed with putting their things in piles at the moment? Anya will empty her books/toys out of shelves/boxes and pile them up in a heap on the floor. I don't mean building a tower (although she does that as well) - I mean a proper heap of random stuff. Sometimes she then wants to sit in the middle of it and rearrange the heap so that everything's within reach.

What's that all about then ?

Dareh likes rows more than piles! We took him to the theatre today - it was so nice!

WWAJC; I hope things do improve over the next couple of months and can understand you wanting to get Christmas over before making a final decision. Incidentally, Relate and other counselling services are ideally for both partners but I believe they are happy to help one half in the hope that the other will join in later. My pals vicar was a relate consellor before she was ordained and made all couples go on her 3 day(!!) marriage preparation course before she would marry them ...one of the things my pal talked about afterwards was how everyone carried emotional 'luggage' around with them, that those who had imperfect upbringings and previous unhappy relationships carried more than average, and how they needed to put that luggage away or it would unbalance their new relationships and future ... I have to say that your Dh sounds like he could do with similar counselling, shame he is so resistant. I'll shut up now, you understandably want to put it on the back burner while things are calm I won't say more unless you ask, just know that you are being thought of.

As to piling up toys like Anya or lining them up in rows like Dareh...nah!(apart from trains)...making as much mess as possible and refusing to tidy up with a determined "nope!" is what Alex specialises in ..Who the heck taught him to add the 'p' to 'no' I will probably never know!!(thoughI suspect his cousins)... but certainly the same person who taught him the expression " ew, yuck!" too! )

Nope, Ben isn't into piling things up at all, Sam on the other hand is

Hope everyone has had a good weekend. I'm happy today, I had a really strict diet week last week to get things kick started as I have been the same weight for months now and was getting fed up. I have lost 5lb :D am now the lightest I have been in 6 years. I am now spurred on to keep it up this week. I want to lose another 4lb and see how I feel and then possibly another 7lb after that.

How sad that losing weight makes me feel so happy!

Hope everyone has a good week, half term again already, doesn't feel 5 mins since the summer!

Lisa; I'm not sure about "less lumpy" at that rate you are going to have to name change again to "no lumps what so ever!" Seriously, well done on being so focused...I wish I could muster some determination to get this next stone off if only to get my BMI down to the 'overweight' categoryrather than 'obese'

We have just got back from a tea 'n toys session...Alex is spark out on the sofa and I think I'll be joining him....I've got a rotten cold, I had a hectic day yesterday (Thane was asked to be a specimen at a Bouvier judging seminar...a honour to be asked, but a 350 mile round trip! [h exhausted emoticon]) Alex was fab for his Dad all the time I was away (first time I have left him for more than 3-4 hours) but very demanding when I got home and woke 3 times in the night before deciding 5am was get up time and so I'm utterly shattered....evening afternoon all.

Hello Ladies
Just wrote most of what I had to say and my pissing internet closed down! So will have to be a summary i'm afraid-
Been back only about an hour from being away, done 600 miles this weekend so am shattered, hate driving so much, esp with hardly any sleep for 3 days, went really well with the sil/db df/dsm, not one argument or sniping at each other, hardly any sleep though, and Shannon had D&S on and off through the whole weekend.

LLL-Well done on weight loss.

WWAJC-Does DH realise how you feel? I know its prob stating the obvious-but he may not realise the seriousness of it all.

Can't say Shannon cares about heaps or rows tbh but she's obsesive about always having her blanket, raggy baby and atm her Dora book, that she calls her Fifi book

Dal-ooooooh exciting for Thurs, hope all is well in case i don't get on again before then.

FT- Hope your cold eases off soon, think I'm starting with it as DB and SIL where full of it and they like to share
Lol at Alex saying 'nope' Shannon says 'yesssss' its really cute and lispy, oh and she called Rich a 'minger' this evening-think thats courtesy of the cpmpany we where in this weekend

Sorry if I've missed anyone, need to go sort washing out and get prepared for tomorrow for the op, am so scared, trying not to think about it Will try to get on tomorrow night but may be a bit dozy still, if not I'll get back on as soon as I can to tell you about me stalling the car in the dark and rain halfway up the steepest road in England

Love to all xx

NC - good luck for today (((hugs))) - hope it all goes well. Take care of yourself afterwards.

Stefka - theatre sounds nice - what did you see? Can't imagine Anya sitting still for long enough!

FT - at a 3 day marriage preparation course - wonder how many then don't get married ? lol at Alex's cousins teaching him bad habits - just wait until they teach him to swear! Well done Thane on being picked for the seminar - hope your cold gets better soon.

LLL - wow at the weight loss, that's brilliant! Enjoy your half term.

NC - glad you enjoyed your weekend away - hope you've managed to catch up on your sleep. What's D&S? Yes, dh knows how I feel - we have serious talks after each major argument and last week I told him I thought maybe he was right and we should think about splitting - he's been threatening to leave for months and I've always begged him to stay. That did seem to shock him a bit and the conversation that followed did involve what we would both need to do (rather than just what I would need to do) to make it work - but tbh nothing's changed in the last few days and I've started to be really honest with myself and am coming to the conclusion that I don't want to be with him anymore. He went into town to watch the football on Sunday and I had a great day with Anya - I am so much happier when he's not around and I would rather have more of that happiness than keep flogging a dead horse.

Anya's got such a bad cold at the moment - really bad cough and sneezing/snuffly, plus a temp, although she did seem a bit better this morning before I left (I've got a really quiet day at work today! ). I took her to our local garden centre on Sunday - they've got their Christmas displays up, which are always fabulous. We spent about 2 hours in there while Anya went "wow" at everything, especially the displays with polar bears and snowmen ("noman!") She was having a great time - right up until the point where she snatched a large bauble off a low table and hurled it onto the floor . I'm sure she was expecting it to bounce. It didn't of course, it shattered - she looked really shocked. I did offer to pay (no idea how much it was but everything in there is very over-priced) - but the assistants were very nice and said accidents happen. I'm quite sure the other customers were disapproving - this is quite a posh garden centre, full of middle-age ladies-who-lunch and there's me with a delinquent toddler who smashes things ! We left after that.

WWAJC; Alexs' cousins had better not teach him to swear or I'll be teaching them the experience of having their mouths washed out with soap!!!!! It's embarrassing enough having him shouting "Beer! Beer! Beer!" as we walk through Tescos without him adding anything worse. He hasn't smashed anything in a shop yet but them I'm permantly on guard for such things as that sort of thing is the 'norm.' for him, must have been a shock for you when Anya is so very good normally and I bet you won't want to be going back for a little while yet will you? And there was I, about to suggest a meet up at your garden centre before Christmas too!!!!
I shouldn't try to play the amateur psychologist but Rs' htreats to walk out do sound to a) controlling (I tried it whan I was 5.. Mum packed my bag, handed it to me and said goodbye...she won) and b) a cry for attention but no matter what his reasons concious or unconcious if you are happier alone perhaps that is the right route for you to go down. However I would still urge you to see a cousellor to talk through your options and know without doubt that you have made the right decision for all of you. Dh and I were fortunate to have a former organist for a vicar rather than a former Relate counsellor so we just got the usual 60min pre-marital chat during which he said that the CofE didn't believe that "'till death us do part" was a decree written in stone, that they didn't want people who had made a mistake and were making each other miserable to be forced to stay together but that they did instist that they had tried every avenue to avoid divorce suggesting himself as a first port of call and Relate as a second... I must have been getting cold feet at the time because it is all I can remember him talking about!

NC I hope all goes well today and it isn't as uncomfortable and debilitating as you thought it might be though I quite understand your trepidation.

Must go and finish stripping the hallway or we are not going to have it finished for Christmas