June 08: I see it, I want it, it's mine!

[spongebrainmaternitypants]

Welcome to our new thread .

neverthoughidask - assume you're sponge?!

neenz - don't know what happened at the carpark, but I hope (and expect!) you gave as good as you got, whatever that was

PP - yep that is definitely huge, good on you for making the move. Hope things turn out as you'd like. Assume it was the potential move that prompted it - has it been at the back of your mind as something you wanted to do?

amber that's good re. the survey, that's one more step dealt with

neenz, I'm going through the same thing with clothes. Bought a dress today for work - one that really suits me, which is a rare thing to find!

Was a bit peed off at work today. I work 4 days 7.30-4, and boss asked me yesterday if I could 'be flexible' in the coming weeks as it's going to get busy. Said yes (as reorg is looming), but really I can't be flexible, as have no support whatsoever re. childcare outside of nursery. Also had asked for an afternoon off one day next week and he ummed and aahed and said it would probably be ok

x-posted sponge! Thought for a moment that we had another imposter!

How are you feeling? You must be feeling very, very pg by now - are you at that stage where you're wobbling around?

and no, YANBU! When I was pg with A, people kept saying to my mum that presumably she was hoping for a girl this time (mum & dad had 3 grandsons already but no girls). Very rude indeed!

LOL - I only want to have boys! Although my v. weird colleague at work - he's Chinese - his wife is pg (he told me they were trying - before I even knew his surname! TMI!) and I asked about the baby etc to make conversation, asked if he knew what the sex was - and he said 'a boy' and burst into tears, of sadness, because he really wanted a girl. I made reassuring noises, eg. 'next time' and he started to wail because they can't afford another one. (Also - it's all relative, really, he earns more than I do, and as long as you feed your baby and dress it you can do without everything else. And he's not that poor, not living on the streets poor by any stretch.)

Really sorry to hear about Luke, Amber, and also the weird lower offer at work, Abdn. That's a bummer.

Shoes - well, I have some fab ones for pram walking. I got some in Jan and PP complimented me on them. But, they ain't trendy - the tagline is 'the European comfort shoe'. Hello grandma! But they do look ok, I think. The Jan pair had some stitching coming undone 2 weeks ago so I took them to the shop (because they were expensive) and they swapped them for my choice of this season's shoes, which are even better! Here they are - Essie does granny. Oh, they're even called 'Nan'!! I have the red ones. They also do boots, but they are soooooo comfortable.

I can't get boots unless they're from one shop. My legs are too thin.

Hi all, I'm here, but supposed to be studying for the next two weeks, shout at me if I write more than 2 lines please.

hope all is well with everyone x

Lol allnew - tis me!

Changed my name to post on baby names cos didn't want RL people knowing my choices and still not 100% sure I haven't got some real life stalkers! Problem is I'm such a bird brain that whenever I change my name here I forget to change it back and give myself away!

I am very very big now yes - definitely have the pg waddle going on big style. Pelvis is extremely painful and I'm soooooo tired. Sorry to moan . 33 weeks now though so not long .

Yes, gender thing is weird - and very rude. For lots of deep seated psychological reasons I'm actually quite relieved to be having two boys but people nowadays seem to think having boys is a real disappointment and that women esp will be very disappointed if they don't have a daughter. Weird.

Hi everyone,

I've been checking in over the last few days but not much time to post. I've had to take a break from revising to do an assignment which is due in MUCH earlier than I thought it might be .

S has been a bit poorly today. He had his MMR yesterday and when he woke up this morning he was like a furnace! But despite being really really hot his temperature seemed fine I'm now questioning the accuracy of our digital ear thermometer... I was a bit surprised they went ahead with the MMR actually as he's had a cold but she didn't seem concerned about that at all.

I was furious with the nursery nurse woman who's part of the HV team. She does all the weight clinics, "advises" about weaning (i.e. gives out jars). I mentioned that S had steadily dropped down the centiles and she said he might have to get referred to the sick kids hospital. Firstly, we've highlighted his weight f*ck knows how many times (sorry ) and despite saying 'oh we'll keep an eye on it etc etc' or 'he might be anaemic' they never actually follow up on anything or do any tests, and now she's scared the life out of me by saying he might need a hospital referral. However, she hasn't actually suggested he get weighed or given any indication how they'll know he's still dropping down the centiles because he doesn't get another check by the HV till he's 3. In fact, he hasn't seen a full qualified HV since he was about 4 months old. Grrrr. sorry, was in need of a rant.

And then (nearly finished, I promise ) I had to really push to get the bookstart pack with his free books that he's supposed to get at the same time as his MMR. (Well, that's when they give it out here - i know it can be different elsewhere). The nurse who did his jabs said yes, he should get it but she didn't know where the packs were (and if I hadn't asked for it she wouldn't have mentioned it). Then the HV nursery nurse was muttering that the HV's gave them out (how? they don't automatically see babies between 4 months and 3 years old???). Finally they managed to find one for me. Tbh, it's not like we need free books - we buy S plenty and take him to the library. But if I need to really push to get what they're supposed to distribute to everyone, then the families that could benefit from some extra free resources don't stand a chance.

Ok, will stop for breath now and catch up on the day's posts!

allnew, can't believe your boss - what a numpty!

Essie, lol at your Nan shoes ! I was in a Parentcraft group with a woman who told us on first meeting her that she'd "cried for weeks" when she found out she having a boy .

When I think of some of the things that parents have to cope with (illness, disability, etc) being devastated cos you got the wrong gender is seriously fecking warped!

BDQ, sorry to hear about the stupid nursery nurse . Would it help to see your GP and discuss your concerns (if you are concerned?). Get him/her to weigh S and see what they think.

Your recent photos on FB are gorgeous btw, and he certainly doesn't look underweight, but I know that's not much help .

on the gender issue - tbh I really do think that whatever gender you want, it's so exciting when the baby is born that you will always end up being so glad with whatever you get. Can't believe that guy being so upset about having a boy . I know what you mean sponge, people assume that a woman must want to have a daughter. Tbh, before I had A, I had fantasies about having a DD, but now I don't think about it at all, I love A so much he's all I want. Likewise I probably would feel the same if I'd had a girl - would love the baby to bits whatever

bdq - i'm not surprised you are feeling . Does S look and act healthy? If so, I imagine he really is fine - I'm absolutely no expert whatsoever, but I've seen so many reports of nonsense that HV's have said that it's hard to take them seriously. They seem to have no clue whatsoever most of the time. I think S is walking already? If he's moving around lots, maybe this is contributing to the falling down centiles? I haven't had A weighed for ages and have no clue what he weighs. Hope you're not worrying too much and that S is fine (p.s. my doc is very much of the 'no fuss' variety and gave A the mmr even tho he was very snotty at the time, tho I've heard others won't give it at all at the slightest hint of anything)

BDQ S looked fine and dandy to me when I saw him. I would second Sponge's suggestion. Make and appt to see your GP and they'll either put your mind at rest or make an appropriate referral. My good friend who's a paediatrician isn't the slightest bit worried about C, and she's done a similar slide to S. She was 8lb at birth so 75th% and is now below 20th% - the FF car seat is still not yet bought....

Ooh, I'm going to need to check out fly boots allnew.

Thanks for the goofbay tip ktpie - I'll check that out too. Hope you're feeling better soon.

Puree the 'staying in a hotel' while DH and kids camp is inspirational! I must file that away for future use.

Amber sorry you had another rotten night. I hope the move goes well though. I missed the booster chat, but if its not commonplace to give another booster so soon then I too would really question whether he needs it. I'm probably being a bit thick but I don't get why a high rate of measles means you should get a booster earlier? Surely the measles rate is higher because the vaccination rate is lower than elsewhere? Does the first jab only give immunity against X number of measles cases per 100 children or something? (Sorry, that last one was a bit facetious). We wont have one till later either (presumably about age 4 same as abdn) Whinegums that really sucks about the nursery. I want to say email your boss, but unfortunately if he's not very switched on he could have a 'she's not even started and already her family life is getting in the way' mentality which could start you off on the wrong foot. It's a really tough call.

Abdn yay and boo about DH's job. No holidays for two years is rubbish (we've had that) but the permanent nature of the post is maybe worth it... Asking for a review in 6 months isn't a bad idea if they really won't budge on the cash.

PP good for you on emailing your dad. I really hope it works out well for you.

at sponge and her secret identity! But have to say, DH and I rage about P&T spaces AND people who park accross two spaces . Personally, I think the problem is that the P&T spaces are too close to the shop. Put them a bit further away from the shop, with a decent walkway/crossings to the entrance and people wouldn't use them as much.

allnew sorry you were p'd off at work. Tbh, I'd speak to your boss and explain that you really can't be flexible in your hours, but that you appreciate its busy and you'll really try and get through as much extra work as you can during your working hours (sorry, not sure what field you're in). If he thinks you will be flexible but you actually can't then it's likely to create more of a problem...?

Ok, that's me done. It's nearly nine o'clock and I haven't started studying yet. Oh dear. Viva is clearly much more diligent than me.

Oh, x-posted with loads; thanks all for kind words and support about S. I think I might arrange to see the GP, but I'm heartened to hear about your paed friend Viva. I think I'm just really cross because I'd finally embraced the 'growth charts are rubbish, as long as he's happy and developing there's nothing to worry about' mentality and then the stupid woman goes and freaks me out.

BDQ, lol at being angry with people parking across two spaces!! Problem is that I genuinely worry about people parking too close and me not being able to get in the car - and this has happened to me too . Not only being pg, but also with SPD, I'm supposed to open the door to it's full width so I can keep my legs closed and climb in the car like a laaaady .

I have also had the situation where I have not been able to get A into his car seat cos of someone parking too close.

I totally agree with you about the spaces being too close to the shop - that would instantly solve the problem cos people only park there cos most of them are sooooo lazy that a 30 sec walk across the car park is just too much for their poorly legs .

Tossers!

sponge - you remind me of a subject which was close to my heart when i had spd. I used to inwardly fume at not being able to park close to things when I could barely walk with SPD, yet because you're 'only pregnant' you have no right to park close to anything. I remember having to walk 1/2 mile on crutches because of not having the necessary badge. Bureaucracy has really taken over having a piece of paper is more important than whether or not you can walk. I know a lot of people disagree with me on this, but it used to make me mad

allnew, it's such a tricky one isn't it cos really you should be able to have 'temporary' disabled blue badges so that we can cut down on how much walking we have to do.

Although I did have someone once say to me that if I could walk round the supermarket I could walk from the other end of the car park . Twunt .

sponge when I was pg I read a letter in the metro by someone who was saying he gave up his seat on the underground to someone on crutches but not to someone who was heavily pg because the injured person did not choose to be on crutches whereas it was the pg woman's choice to be that way . tbh when I was pg and then also on crutches that finally got me a seat!

I'm back from Italy - had a great week, hot weather, lovely sandy beach, yummy pizzas and ice cream.Had lots of plans but apart from visiting a Roman town and a water park we just spent the days at the beach which was just in front of our apartment - couldn't have been easier. Well apart from Ethan developing a very stroppy personality on holiday and perfecting a high pitched shriek when he didn't get his own way! Photos on FB tomorrow, boring unpacking to do now, will catch up soon.

Hope everyone's well, anyone fancy summarising the past week for me?????

Hi debs - welcome back! Glad you had a fab time, holiday sounds great. Sorry but I'm also glad it's not just me with the stroppy one year old. A can well and truly twist me round his little finger with his unimpressed faces and growling at me

Scared to summarise cos I'm bound to leave someone out but from what I remember from today - amber is moving tomorrow and had been having a hard time with an ill Lukie, pp has just made contact with her father who she's never seen/not seen for long time, abdeen's DH been offered lower salary in job, whinegums starting work, moving house and having nursery nightmares as nursery opens on same date as she starts work, bdq worried about S's lack of weight gain and annoying HV type woman, ktpie just been to wales, puree(?) having issues with visitors staying a long time, neenz buying lots of clothes(!), essie is wearing granny shoes!

Lukie - sorry amber, Luke!

Thanks Allnew - great summary. I'm also pleased that Ethan's not the only stroppy one! We managed 2 meals out(proper restaurants) on holiday and they were difficult - highchairs which attach to the table meaning too many things within a little hands reach! We were very thankful for the takeaway pizza place and ice cream next to the apartment!!Such a shame we weren't there longer, I didn't manage to get through all the ice cream flavours

Just quickly - Amber - good luck with the move

PP - quite a brave thing to do, getting in touch with your Dad. well done, now it's down to him.

Amber DH is going to hold firm for a bit - the oil and gas industry is not in a recession and his company is expanding so they really are taking the piss. We are pretty confident he'd get other work quickly too as he's got a very useful qualification (chartered mechanical engineer).

I'd be holding off on the booster if it was me too - and I'm normally very pro-immunization.

whinegums I didn't have settling in periods for Fraser at nursery and he was fine. Upset at drop off, but always okay when I came to pick him up (I used to sneak in and spy to see if he was okay).

PP good for you - and fingers crossed.

i agree that parent and tot spaces should be far away from the entrance - it would help! I hate when I can't get one and I've two kids in the cart. How on earth can I get them both in the car without leaving one kid in the cart in the middle of the drive? Grr!

sponge two boys is wonderful!!! I'll punch her for you if you'd like. I really hate when people imply that I'm not 100% thrilled with Fraser.

bdq I refuse to let the HV weigh Fraser (we do at home though) because I don't want them to tell me he's too light. And he was 9lbs at birth and is barely 9kg now!

allnew excellent job on the summary - I'm impressed!

so, one day after asking me if i could be 'flexible' on the odd occasion, manager has this morning already asked me if I can stay 'late' this evening. I said I would ask dh if he can do the collection from nursery, but I'm really annoyed

allnew, you left me out !

at your boss - talk about taking the piss.

Deb, welcome back! The demanding toddler thing is hard isn't it? Alex has a melt down if he doesn't get what he wants - and of course crying is his only way of communicating at the moment!

AH, I will tell her if I see her again that she is going to get an angry Canadian after her if she makes any more stupid comments!