June 2008: birthdays, bunting and bumps make mummy a little bit tired!

[pureeandpearls]

Bring it on!!!

Fabulous cakes Viva and Whinegums and Viva I am seriously impressed at your bunting. My self-imposed deadline of tomorrow (DD1's birthday and the last birthday of our houses' Birthday Season) has not helped me make any bunting. It looks wonderful!

Whinegums I'm afraid I agree with everyone else about the room-sharing. When we had DS1 we lived in a 2-bed flat and the 2nd bedroom was a study. We eventually moved a couple of bookcases to make room for his cot - didn't really make it bedroomy or anything, just enabled him to sleep in there, and his sleep improved straightaway. I know someone who curtained off an alcove for the cot (not as squalid as it sounds, it was a lovely sprawly flat but not designed with children in mind) and that worked quite well.

Sponge I know what you mean about the tall thing. My cousins are all very petite and very beautiful and I grew up thinking of myself as a very clodhoppy, lumpen thing. When I went to university (in the South, where they grow 'em taller) I realised that my cousins are in fact midgets and at 5'5" I am not huge at all. But I still feel that way which is quite confusing.

Parish council - I thought you were a committed atheist? Have I got the wrong person?

KT we get cards in the post from the GP asking us to book Thea in for jabs. I haven't dealt with the last one, and got a call from the surgery chasing me.

Lol Rolf - the parish council is nothing to do with the church . Yes, I am a committed atheist - I get struck down by lightening every time I walk near a church .

It was a very interesting meeting - you would not believe how corrupt politics is, even at a parish level!

Yes, can totally relate on comparing yourself to lots of petite women - I am 5'9" and a size 14 (when not pg, when I'm a size blob!), and I've always felt huge. My weight at the height and clothes size makes me a BMI of 25 which is perfectly healthy, but if I told you what it was you'd probably think it was obese!

The thread has fallen off the "threads I'm on", so marking my place really.

Ummm...

Sponge I also have the feeling big issue as a result of being tall. I echo everyone's at the nasty things people said over the weekend.

Teeth 4 here (just about). P only produces teeth when we take him on holiday (no kidding). The first two came when we were skiing; the third appeared at Deb's, and the fourth just broke the gum this weekend at the PILs. I am taking P to France next week to my parents, so will wait to see if the trend continues.

Hair quite a lot, a kind of mid brown colour which is a blonder version of my colouring. Strangely I have never much liked my hair, but with my besotted Mummy goggles on I just love the colour of P's hair. It has had a small trim round the front so far as it was in his eyes. A friend's little girl has a serious natural mullet. At 12 months old I remarked that her fringe had been trimmed. Her Mum said no, it just doesn't grow at the front and is now curling on her shoulders.

Stairs update after four days with lots of GP stimulation, P has cracked going down the stairs,and even managed our very steep stairs at home this afternoon.

Hiya - Very busy and exciting few days in the Penguin household hence the lack of posting.

As some of the London ladies know PND and associated anxiety issues have meant that public transport has been a no go for me for about six months. :0( (Actually it was worse than that with full blown agrophobia around Mothers Day). Anyway, no more sad emoticons, in the last week I have got on three buses and six tubes by myself!!! I know this might sound silly but I'm on a bit of a high about it!

Just gonna catch up on the last two pages now and stop being self obsessed.

Well done PP that's great to hear. Sounds like a perfectly good reason for being on a high.

Teeth - we've five here, with number 6 on the verge of a breakthough (although its been like that for about a week).

Hair - S had his first haircut just before his birthday as fb regulars might have seen in my photos. He looked so grown up afterwards!

Alipalli that's great about the stairs. Remind me, are you a yay or a nay with stairgates? We had a bit of a success yesterday too. S climbed about half way up a friend's stairs yesterday then promptly worked his way back down. We've been doing lots of feet first off the sofa and our bed so something must be sinking in. DH took him to a rather cool soft play today that has a decent climbing bit in it (as opposed to the usual smattering of cubes and soft rockers you usually find in the under 3 section) and apparently he managed to get himself down feet first there too.

We got a reminder today about S's 12 month jabs - I think its going to be in a few weeks when he's just about 13 months . Someone, poppy I think (?) held back from a rant about the lack of 12 month check ups and HV care. Can't remember if I had time to post to say that there are no 12 month checks here either. When I asked about it I was told that the HV would be happy to do one if I arranged an appointment. It made me really cross though, because as I've mentioned previously, my HV team covers quite a mixed area, much of which is quite run down and deprived, and I suspect the families who could probably benefit most from regular HV support would be those who probably dont ask for it. I'll hold back from a full on rant though .

Essie sorry to hear how Iestyn was shunned? I have to confess I've been a bit nervous about people who say they might have come into contact with SF . I'm normally the last person to be like that too and am normally very sensible and level headed about such things. I think I must have a suppressed PFB gene somewhere that has broken loose . Our receptionist at work quite casually dropped it into conversation and I was mildly anxious about it. I didn't shun her though - but I did wash my hands a lot .

Right, must think about bed. Viva and whinegums I've messaged you about a meetup.

Penguin - great news about your success with the public transport, well done.

Rolf - lol at the f words!!

Whinegums - Ethan is in with Tristan and it works oK if they go to bed at the same time , but last night Tristan was awake in the night (growing pains) and disturbed Ethan - the oly thing that worked to calm him down was bringing him into bed and feeding him all night - seriously, it was like having a newborn again and I'd reduced to 2 feeds a day \as well. So you're not the only one - if Ethan could have his own room I would love it but it's impossible here.

So after our very disturbed night, we received a call at 8.00 this morning to say that someone wanted to view the house at 10.30. I can honestly say that dh and I have never worked so hard, and achieved so much in 2 hours!! Remember that we are in the middle of taking the old kitchen out, we have new units around the house and the Indeshit dishwasher in the middle of the kitchen floor, combined with boys on holiday, toys and clothes everywhere etc etc...But we did it and the man seemed to like the house but you can never tell can you? Keep your fingers crossed for me though.

Off to search through cupboards and drawers to find the stuff I hid this morning!

Oh yes - the other great news, it's been hot today and we've been swimming this afternoon - I burnt my back - that will teach me not to trust my 7 year old to apply my suncream!

Deb - I have a cartoon image in my head of a cot with a huge bite taken out of it.

Rolf - LOL at the swearing. The game sounded fun until the damsel in distress bit. Played a similar type of game myself this morning, this time I ended up with a knee to the forehead. Still hurts.

Daren't check for more teeth as it will mean getting bitten, but at last count there were 8. BTW Has anyone worked out how to stop their baby swallowing the toothpaste when brushing their teeth?

I'll own up. I shunned Iestyn because of the swine flu risk. Actually that's not true. I shunned Iestyn because of my anxiety ATM. I've exposed Ry to tonsilitus, hand & foot and german measles in the last fortnight and every time he was absolutely fine. I however was an anxious mess the day after each time. (Dfn of anxiety disorder = excessive, irrational fear and dread. I fully accept that the anxiety was excessive and irrational, but that doesn't make the accompanying emotions any less painful ). Glad that your lovely little boy has remained healthy Essie.

Viva - Not exactly got a full head of hair here either. He has some, but not as much as other babies his age. As Ali said, Peter for example has a lovely head of hair.

KT - GP surgery rang us to book 12 month jabs. Haven't heard from HV for at least 6 months.

Sponge - Horrible, horrible people! Completely outraged on your behalf. Re: IVF, why couldn't he simply respect your decision and keep his mouth shut? Esp. in your house. I saw the FB comment and was about to post 'WTF?', but didn't in case it was a friend of yours and an in joke IYKWIM. If you look at my FB pictures, in particular the babies 1st party, you will see there is a little girl there much bigger than Alex (and bigger than Peter too Ali). She is a beautiful baby and 100% healthy and happy. She's one of my favourites actually.

Ok - I think that's an epic post, so will sign off now. Wishing full nights sleep to you all - esp Amber and Whinegums.

Oh, consider your cake admired viva !

We've friends staying at the moment at ours so I've been skimming briefly, but i don't have time to respond really - but sponge I think anyone who says that (especially when it's from both H&W) should no longer be a friend. That's just inappropriate and very mean. Do they have an underweight child? DH and I used to get very upset at all the comments about how tiny DS1 was, and often they came from people with bigger kids (because the contrast makes my boys look even titchy-er).

Fraser's just gotten his 7th tooth - a molar! ouch. There's been lots of calprofen in this house lately. He's also learned to climb onto the kitchen table via a chair. My days of sitting in the living room with a coffee are over! I need to follow him around now...

I think the pandemic status has made swine flu sound so much scarier. I feel a bit scared about it but I know it's ridiculous. Also, I read that the absolute biggest risk is that GPs wont want to see people with flu symptoms and will just diagnose as swine flu. There are a lot more dangerous things (meningitus, pnuemonia) that have the same symptoms and it's important to demand a GP appt if really unwell. From personal experience, I'll be doing this. When DH and I were younger and lived in Vancouver, DH had what we thought was the flu. After 5 days and a really high temp we took him to the doctors and it turned out to be a very serious case of pnuemonia. He was almost hospitalized but was allowed to stay home if i stayed off work and now has permanent scar tissue in one lung that he can notice. It's very scary and I worry a lot about what would happen if he got pnuemonia again, especially when he's old and grey(er). Very serious - I will never let anyone fob me off without seeing a Dr!!!!

Viva - going to track you down on fb so I can look at this cake! My rather rubbish attempt is on fb too.

Allnew - I was a student in Manchester! I loved it and always enjoy going back.

I'm 5'7" and size 14-16 and can feel like a big clod hopping giant sometimes, one girl I know must be 5' at the most and is in proportion so tiny (wears childrens clothes!), always feel ginormous and clumsy around her!

Penguin - well done with the public transport, I'm a bit embarassed to admit that I am yet to tackle the bus with J. Which is a bit daft as we only have one vehicle (a van!), usually DH cycles to work so I have the van but at least once a week he takes it, this was fine when we lived in a town as I could walk up to all the shops but we have now moved to a village and on vanless days I tend to only plan to stay around here, which is silly as there is a regular bus. In my head I have built it up to be a big mission so really I should tackle it, so yes I am impressed!

Debs - hope the man liked the house, I hated having viewings although they tended to go better when I had had less time to prepare! I had 10 minutes warning when the bloke who bought the house came round, and I had to change a nappy in that time! It's all very stressful, what is the market like over there?
Looks like our weather has swapped with yours, no chance of sunburn here, just rain!

Thanks for the info on jab reminders, not sure what possessed me when I thought that my surgery might be organised enough to send out a reminder. They once sent me a letter saying that I should have had a smear six months previously (I was meant to be having them every 6 months but I'd got confused and couldn't remember if it was 6 months or 12 months so hadn't organised it myself) but they had forgotten to remind me so I'd better have one as soon as possible, went for it and got a big ticking off from the nurse! Then they sent me rather a strange letter saying that I would need another in 6 months time but they might or might not send out a reminder so I'd better put it in my diary.
I'd better ring them about the jabs.

J is getting pretty good at the stairs, I let him do them every time unless I am in a rush, he needs to be well supervised as he has slipped and tumbled into my arms a couple of times but he turns round at the top and backs off the top step.

Just watching about the Great Yorkshire Show on the news, I'm from up that way and a bit jealous as some of my friends are going. I went one year and had a great time at the beer tent and in the food tent!

Another epic post from me so going to shut up now!

X-posted aberdeen, how is the chicken pox?
Horrible about the pnuemonia, you're right about insisting on being seen if you are worried.

Viva - think I found you on fb but didn't say who I was so if you get an odd friend request it will be me!

the chicken pox is all over thankfully - except for one spot on the top of Ds1's head that I really want to pick off and he wont let me. It's all crusted into his hair and I think it's his hair that's holding it on rather than his scalp....

I'm averaged size in every way - 5'5", and I realized that part of the reason my boys seem so small is all my friends are about six inches taller. Genetically it makes sense my kids are a bit shorter. I have no idea why my friends are all taller - must be something in the water around here.

My DH is in Norway this week but when he's back we're going to sit down and (a) apply for more life insurance for him and (b) write a resignation letter for me. I'm terrified but I'm pretty confident this is the right choice for us... Turns out a friend of mine can get me into a training course for unemployed engineers (scientists being close enough) that would really help me get contract work so it seems like a no brainer. It seems like a bit of a cheat but they don't ask why you're unemployed. (Staying home to take care of the kids isn't really the point of the program...).

Right, I know I've missed so much - sorry! Rather than try to reply to everyone though I'm just going to try to keep up from here...

Hi all, not managed to keep up what with Luke being ill but hurrah he is better now so thanks everyone for nice messages. I have taken him to nursery for a few hours to get him back into it - he looked a bit confused poor thing. Re Iestyn's shun, I got a door slammed in my face and I was standing about three feet away - hmmm.

Teeth, Luke has 2 and two half through at the top. He has hair but it is a mullet - why does it grow so much faster at the back??

My query is this: Is Luke the only baby not to have any words yet? He says mama and dada but I don't think he really gets what they mean. He certainly doesn't have any other words! I was very impressed by Iestyn's miaow although I didn't hear it much as we tried to make him do it!

Ooh - Aberdeen - glad the CP is all over now! and weight wise, I must be the biggest heifer on MN at 5'8" and size 16 (on a good day!).

amber so glad Like is better! i've been thinking about you and half-worrying... It must have been scary!

And fraser might be saying dada but otherwise is only saying uhoh. And DS1 didn't say a single word until 18 months so they've tons of time!

Isn't size 16 pretty normal? It's the equivalent of a 12 in Canada and that's the average size there. And it does make a difference height-wise, 5'8" is tall in my book!

Wait - didn't Sponge say she was size 14? I've been size 14, and I'm 5.3. So Sponge, you are so not fat! But you actually aren't fat, you don't look it. Really and honestly. Amber, you're another who doesn't look fat - busty, yes, but boy, what would I give to have your fabulous boobs!
See, to me, if you're really fat I expect hanging flesh, overhang on chairs, special circumstances on planes etc etc. Size 16 doesn't really get into that category.

Amber remember that Iestyn was always much more backward than Luke when it came to being active. He's more of a sitter and a talker than a mover. Can't imagine where he gets that from...

I am really, really depressed now because I have just done the most magnificent f*ckup on a colossal level - time, money, job prospects. In short, I have been doing the WRONG Open University course. If I didn't have a baby I would be close to suicide now. It's enormous.

oh essie - don't know what to say. Obviously you must be devastated - how did you find out? Is this something you've been working on all year?

Size 14/16 must be the average these days. I now stay away from shops where the sizes are teeny. I find some shops make me feel fat though. In some shops, a size 14 barely fits around my torso, whereas in others a 12/14 is fine. I'm still nowhere near my pre-pg weight which is really depressing as all my nice clothes are tiny and I am not

amber glad Luke is better

Re. words, A says quack quack constantly. Bless him, he says it whenever he sees any animal, and does the duck sign. He says dada but really don't think he knows what it means. He has occasionally said hello. Never has said mama despite my efforts! What he did say which was very funny was repeating me when I said 'no no no' when he was banging against the tv. Shook his head while he was saying it which was hilarious

ktpie if you're ever down here let me know - I've never met a mnetter in RL before!

Essie . Teaching or studying the wrong course? Is any of it transferable? Sorry you feel so sad.

Aberdeen glad you've made the decision, I know it's been a difficult one to make.

Amber you look so glamorous in your fb photos!

Penguin well done! Ktpie is right - all that public transport is a big deal! I haven't gone on a bus with Thea. I went on buses, tubes, trains, everything with DS1 but have lost my bottle since moving up here!

Ktpie I hate standing next to someone much smaller than me and feel so awkward and clodhoppery. Horrid feeling.

I'm 5'5" and a size 14, and almost 25 BMI. I know that isn't fat but I am quite small boned and not very well proportioned (high-waisted, huge arse!) and I don't carry extra weight very well at all. I feel more comfortable at a size 12 and about 1.5 stone lighter, and keep kidding myself that all I need to do is stop breastfeeding and the weight will fall off. Obviously the heavy chocolate intake has no role to play!

I assumed that all these body changes are solely due to childbearing and breastfeeding, but talking to a friend in her 30s without children, apparently the lovely spreading hips effect is also due to ageing! It put things into perspective for me as she'd love to have children and has fertility problems and would accept an extra dress size/flobby belly with pleasure if she could have children.

Essie - sorry to hear about the course - so, what's the next step?

Amber - Ethan says dada but to anything not just dh, the only other word is hiya but again, not in the right context. The other boys weren't early talkers so I'm not too worried.

Thea doesn't have words. She says da and ba, and an affirmative sounding noise a bit like "yuh". I wasn't expecting any words just yet, tbh.

It's DD1's 4th birthday today. We're having a lovely day together. She wanted to go into town to buy some clothes (new experience for me!) and we go to a coffee shop together after shopping . I think she would really like it if I made more effort with my appearance. She isn't an especially girly girl, but she does look a bit deflated when she asks me what I'm going to wear and (every day) I reply "jeans".

We were a bit too conspicuous on the train. She wanted to wear her new pirate outfit and was so excited she sang "if you're happy and you know it". Thea wanted feeding but I couldn't bring myself to feed her in front of the grumpy commuters, so we were the trio with the singing pirate and screaming baby!

size wise, we're all normal! I'm 5'7 and a size 14, went shopping the other week for a bridesmaid dress with the size 8 bride and 3 other bridesmaids, (a six and 2 size 8s) I wish I'd been with all you normal sized people! Equally my very good friend here with a 7 month old is irritatingly sylph-like post baby. damn the skinny minnies!

words we're majoring in words rather than movement here! we've got hiya, banana (nana), ball, daddy, yeah and no. noticeable absence of mummy, which has appeared only twice! - I seem to remember than Paro's fleur had a lot of words ages ago? how's she doing now paro

thanks for all your nice comments on the cake - it tasted good too!

essie rats about your course, I hope you can sort it out somehow...

Hello, ok, things not quite as bad now. I'll explain in brief:
Agreed to do 2 OU law courses, 1 this year, a general law one; and one next year, on criminal law. Finishing both would give me a diploma.
Phoned up in a panic at Christmas as I'd forgotten to sign up, and the guy on the phone signed me up to W100, An introduction to law. I had nothing in front of me to double check.

Started work, Iestyn's nursery, OU course, etc etc in January.

Went to sign up on the next course and put the current one towards my Diploma, and the website said it didn't count. Phoned up, was told it didn't count - I had done the wrong course. I should have done W200, Understanding Law. (!) I thought I was doing that one, and hadn't checked the reference numbers or anything. Which, with hindsight, was rather stupid.

The course I'm doing is around GCSE level, and counts for nothing. In fact, I don't have to carry on because my marks have been amazingly high and I've already passed it despite having 3 assignments to go. But it's also for people with no degree(s), probably no a-levels, or who haven't studied for years.

I phoned yesterday and was told nothing could be done; I e-mailed my desperate situation (job depends on this etc) but was told 'bad luck, you did the wrong course'. My options are do the criminal course starting in Feb, but get no diploma (in which case I could just sit in on the criminal courses here - for free - because the whole point of the OU was the diploma with two courses). I can do both courses at once in February. Or I can do criminal next year, W200 the year after - which means I'll be studying until October 2011. Plus, I've spent £750 on the pointless course, and the next two are £1900 each. Department paid for the pointless one, and will pay for the next. But they did think they were paying for the W200 leading to a diploma...

This afternoon I phoned and cried and sobbed and wailed down the phone. So we have a possible compromise - possible refers to the stuff being available.
I get this year's course materials now, and I can start studying one/both courses now; the assignments will be different, but it will give me a good idea and can also give me an idea of whether it's possible to do 2 courses at once. (And work, and bring up a baby mostly by myself.) The course materials won't change vastly, and the assignments are likely to be a variation on this year's - so maybe it wouldn't be 2 full courses if I've started right away? Anybody know anything about this?
(Yeah, me - I'm an university lecturer...which makes you wonder why I don't read small print etc and do the most stupid thing I've heard of - I've not yet met a student who manages to complete and excel at the wrong course, and students can be pretty dim!)

Still feeling pretty sad. But also angry at myself for being so stupid. And angry at losing so much time.

Sorry all, I'm in a bit of a me cloud at the moment.

Ali, I love the idea of P only getting teeth while on holiday ! And yay about cracking the stairs - we're getting there but I find it very hard to get up and down on the stairs myself so am not putting in as much work as I need to!

Way to go PP, that is excellent news and not daft to be on a high at all. I remember when I had my IF-related depression, I was soooo proud of myself when I managed to meet up with a friend with a young baby. Meaningless to anyone who hasn't been there but a huge step for you .

BDQ, I think HVs are cutting back on routine checks across the board unfortunately - this is supposed to be so they can focus on the more vulnerable but I'm not sure how they encourage them to access the services?

Deb, v impressed with you tidying up the house when you're half through putting in a new kitchen !

ktpie, good to know J is managing the stairs - that will be a godsend in a few months time ! Btw, your little boy is gorgeous - saw piccies on FB for the first time . Oh, and I'm with you on buses - went on one in Brighton with my parents but generally avoid them like the plague, esp after reading some of the horror stories on here .

AH, good luck with the training course.

Amber, another one here with no words - concentrates on the moving rather than the talking! Boys are generally much slower at talking than girls, with the exception of Iestyn of course . But then with an academic for a mother and a lawyer for a father I'd expect him to have a brain the size of a planet and a vocab to match .

Essie, I did say pre pg size . I was a size 22 after having Alex, managed to get down to a size 18 before getting pg with Bill, so god knows where I'll be after this one. Feel my beautiful wardrobe is probably destined for the charity shop though .

As for the OU course - you poor thing . How and when did you realise? Can you not count any of the modules towards what you actually want? Hope you can seek some resolution that doesn't mean you've wasted your time .

allnew, the image of A saying 'no no no' while banging the tv did make me laugh !

Rolf, I had also heard that the 'spreading' thing was age not childbearing which makes me feel slightly better! And what a lovely image of you on the train !

viva, your LO has a great vocab .

That was a lovely post, Sponge.

Ooops Essie, x-posted.

Shit, that is really crap. Can't really advise cos I have failed dismally to complete either of the two OU courses I signed up for (I cannot study alone, end of) so hugely impressed that you're even contemplating it.

Maybe sign up and give it a go and see how you get on - or is that not v helpful advice? Think you can defer if you can't manage?

Anyway, one to sleep on .