Dec 08 mums - embuggerance to it all - sleep or no sleep we love our babes

[waitinggirl]

i hope people don't mind, i took the bull by the horns and did it. title a bit naff, but more important the thread exists rather than search for a better title. hope i haven't stolen anyone's thunder...

Oh and SL decant a bit of the plum baby into a teeny bowl and put the rest into the fridge for another time, or freezer blocks even.

Can I join you ladies? I've only just discovered mn

Bit of background: I live in the NE, between Newcastle and Sunderland with DP and our 2 horrors delightful children. DS is 2 1/2 while DD was born 27th Dec. She decided to arrive in dramatic style and ended up being an unplanned homebirth. Me and DP both work part time to share the childcare more easily. DCs have us for 1/2 week and spend the rest at nursery. I'm back to work on monday (eek!)so currently going through the "is DD going to survive nursery" blues.

To all those with troublesome sleepers you have my very deepest sympathy. DD isn't too bad although has only just graduated to sleeping in her own cot for most of the night. DS on the other hand was horrendous. He would not sleep at all during the day and would wake anywhere between 20mins and 2hours at night. Once awake he would be WIDE awake for up to 3 hours. Me and DP ended up sleeping in shifts as we worked out we could stay reasonably sane as long as we got 4 hours in a row. Then at 13 months DS slept through- one week he was up 10+ times a night, the next 7-8 no problems. There is hope (just ignore the fact it took til 13months!)

Hope to be able to join in despite my return to work. Actually, I'll probably have more time for t'internet at work than with toddler + baby conspiring against me...

Hello Spiggy . I have a similar age gap: DS1 is 2.8 and DS2 born on the 1st Jan. There are quite a few of us juggling toddlers and babies, the others tolerate our moans about potty training and tantrums...

Good luck for your return to work! You and Dh working p/t sounds ideal, DH and I had a similar arrangement with DS1 but it looks like DH will be full time and a bit more when I go back (he's self-employed). I think it works out really well although it can lead to some wrangles over parenting styles.

woohoo another Northerner!

Spiggy I'm in Durham so not far at all Shall have to drag you to a MN meet-up as there are a few of us lunatics about.

How are you all? We are doing much better with dummy ditching. After the disaster that was last Friday we used the dummy for naps on Saturday to recoup and started again on Saturday night and she has been going down fairly well and "just" waking 3 times a night or so. Today hasn't been a great day though, one of those horrible ones where they fight sleep like nothing on earth and end up screaming to sleep. This morning I gave up getting her in bed and went out and she still screamed herself to sleep in the sling

As usual I'm behind on the catching up again but Trace good decision on the job I think, hope you will soon be a school nurse Arti sorry the second night didn't go well, best wishes for tonight. Am amazed at the crawling babies they are getting so grown up. Turnip sorry for your dh, redundancy is cr*p, very scary how many people are affected at the moment at Swine flu. As for food, I take the keep offering approach. If she doesn't like it then she'll just have more milk so it isn't an issue. Yoghurt makes me laugh as I tend to give her plain so it is a bit sour and she pulls such a funny face but comes back for more

I'm off to go flop on the sofa now as my back is killing me and this chair just isn't doing it much good. That'll teach me to sling ds on my back while pushing dd and 4 bags of compost int he pushchair.

Thanks for the welcome

Luckily DP and me have a quite similar style of parenting, its even easier for us that we work together as well and the boss is really tolerant of us being on the phone several times a day! As long as the job gets done we have flexibility as to who does what at home and at work. DPs only complaint about the set up is that i am the most undomesticated person ever and he gets the house spotless on Monday only for me to mess it up on Tuesday. Even DS shakes his head and says "mamma make a mess AGAIN"

Nice to see a fellow NE person! I'm originally from Liverpool but think after 10 years I may have gone native up here.

I'm too scaredy to ditch the dummy. DD only has it for naps but I can't forget what DS was like and am loath to interfere when she is "only" getting up 3 or 4 times a night.

welcome Spiggy if you're to MN my advice is to stay on our lovely, friendly, helpful, safe thread...don't venture onto the other ones, especially not the AIBUs...they're quite scary!!! Your work situation sounds cool - what do you do? I can't imagine working with my dh - I think I'd need to throttle him!
arti - hope the night has started well.

I meant if you're new to MN...i see my typing hasn't improved since this morning

Actually it was the AIBUs that made me want to join MN- I like people who have opinions! Although it may be significant that it was the lovely, friendly, helpful, safe thread that I joined first

I'm a civil servant, more specifically I work for an organisation that offers information to employees and employers on employment rights and tries to sort out employment tribunal claims (I won't put the name in case it shows on google but people can probably guess) Prior to Mat Leave I was a conciliator but when I go back I'll be managing a team of people who work on our helpline. So anyone with work probs just give me a shout and I'll do my best to help.

Anyway DP dinner is charring so I better go and rescue it....

Hi Spiggy I think your LOs are exactly the same age as mine (anyone potty trained sucessfully yet ?)

Kayzr Pretty exciting if you were pg. I would be jealous If not, might be worth getting your thyroid checked out ?

JJ that swine flu stuff sounds like a complete nightmare for your DH. I try and stay away from the Doc as much as possible because I have a fear of the waiting room for that reason and always look at other people suspiciously.

Does anyone want to have a Cambridge meet up while the weather is still good ? I took DS's on the big train to Bishops Stortford the other week and DS1 was very impressed.

Welcome Spiggy lovely to have you join in.

NJAN I have been to Bishop Stortford, I was very pregnant with DS1 and had to go to give a lecture to some nursing students at one of the middlesex uni campuses, it was a couple of stops from Tottenham hale but I got on the express train and was on the stanstead train the only stop between Tottenham hale and stanstead was Bishop stortford so I had to change there go back to Tott hale and the catch the right train. I was so late the students gave up on me.

I went for a lovely run tonight through some heritage trust land around Kedleston hall, I was running with Pheasants and sheep, it was lovely. Bit sleepy now, DS2 woke for a feed just before I was about to eat my dinner, so I was feeding him but was starving myself.

Hello staines and spiggy.

Arti thinking of you tonight. I really hope it goes well.

On food, when I first started DD got a rash when I gave her anything other than banana - and massively so when she had any plum baby or ella's kitchen. So had to start from scratch and give her plain stuff. Seems to be going ok now though - at the moment she's mad for lentils and sweet potato. LadyT sweet potato is a good way of sweetening other veg. Is perfectly normal for them to only like sweet things ime - their tastebuds are really different and breast milk is quite sweet (allegedly). Would absolutely second veggie's advice to leave them to it to a certain extent. It was only when I stopped making a fuss that DS started to eat more stuff. But that's probably more true later on.

Trace yay for the job. Very best of luck. And JJ boo hiss for yours. Surely that's not terribly flexible. I am in high dudgeon with my work as they can't even work out which one of them is supposed to be responsible for maternity leave, and as we have to make cuts the first thing they've looked at is reducing the maternity package. That'll be a decision made by a group of middle aged men then.

Kayz hope you're feeling better. And spot I second Effie's grr about the tongue tie.

Njan my two are the same gap as well. And potty training...well today DS was playing in the paddling pool today and I took the potty outside and kept telling him that he had to tell me if he needed to use it. He didn't want to put a nappy back on and he came inside and peed on a jigsaw. Without noticing or seeming to care - so think we'll wait a while yet. Today he also watered DD with the hosepipe ('Fancy likes water mummy') and tried to pull her out from under the sofa by her head. Maybe there is something in this sibling rivalry.

NB she was under the sofa because it's her favourite place to wriggle to, not because I keep her there

Also hello turnip so sorry about your DH's job.

If there is going to be a London meet up I've completely missed it. Picnic in the park might be nice?

Really sorry for those of you having bad nights. I remember it well with DS.

Oh and good luck with the house hunting LadyT and Arti. I had our place valued the other week to depress myself about how much value it has lost, but surprisingly things round our way don't seem to have moved much. But they were hardly fabulously pricey to start off with.

As you were,

Lalxxx

Hi everyone, how are you all? I?ve been lurking but haven?t dared post from my phone in case I do a LadyT!

DD is making (small) steps on improving her napping, or maybe I?m just improving at recognising the signals? Anyway, she?s happier and I?m happier too. She?s also worked out how to roll from her front to her back, and although she doesn?t do it every time, she?s happier to play on her own for a while. So with all this free time on my hands, I?ve gone into domestic overdrive and finally tackled my hideous house that was really getting me down. We now have a clean kitchen, clean lounge, clean bathroom, clean DD?s bedroom, a empty ironing basket and a freezer full of puree and adult food ? phew just need to polish my halo and then I?ll be all done! I hate housework, but always feel pretty good when I?ve done some. It?s lovely to sit back and relax tonight in a house that isn?t going to kill me from germ-itis

It was DD?s half birthday on Monday, so to celebrate I took her to be weighed an measured ? she weighs 14lbs and 10oz, and is 25.2 inches, so she?s grown a whole 8lbs 3oz and 6 inches since she was born. Looking at Trace?s survey it seems like we?ve got a bunch of dainty and delicate girls and big, strong boys on here ( at those 20lb+ babies! How do you carry them around?)

And as a second celebration of DD?s half birthday, I?ve given her something other than fruit, veg or porridge ? she?s now had cauliflower cheese, chicken stock, pasta, and the other day happily sucked on a lemon slice from my drink . What was that you were saying about tastebuds Lal? I don?t think DD has any!

But enough about the ZJ's ? welcome to Staines and Spiggy , lovely to have you with us

Crawling and sitting , and even standing again. DD has a lot to learn! But as she?s such a super intelligent child , she?ll catch on quick, I?m sure

Daisy I hope you?re DS slept for a long time in the car, sounded like he needed it. A friend of mine?s LO fell asleep in the car so she went and made a cuppa, got a book and took them into the car with her til he woke up. She sat in the back next to him and forgot about the child locks, so when he woke she had to climb through to the front with him to get out (and then realised it would have been easier to leave him in his seat and get him out the normal way once she?d got out)

JJ My DD loves peekaboo too, her changing mat is on the floor by the window and everytime she grabs the curtain and pulls it over her face and then flings it away with a big grin ? I love it!

Good luck with the job application Trace, I do hope you get it as it sounds ideal for you. And JJ, I hope your job (current or potential one) sorts itself out. Although they aren?t obliged to give you flexible working, they are obliged to consider it and show a business case if they turn down your request ? so they have to prove they can?t fill a job share on those days by testing the market, rather than just assume that it won?t suit sharees (we went through it with a member of my team last year, so sadly I know too much about it), although I don?t know if that policy overrides this. But if they?re looking for a job share, surely they?ll have to spend some money advertising it anyway, regardless of which days they?re looking at? Oh, just realised that Spiggy probably knows far more about it than me, so will hand over to her ?

I?m another Nigel Slater fan, love his Kitchen Diaries and Appetite, I haven?t got Real Fast Food though so will hunt it down after the recommendations

I am so of your peas Veggie. My Mum always grows peas and my summer feels incomplete if I don?t spend evenings sat outside in the sun podding peas. I now spend a fortune on peas in the pod just so I can enjoy the podding. That and my asparagus addiction is likely to bankrupt us

I was really pleased to read your first post on the sleep training Arti, and now I?m sad it didn?t work last night. I have my fingers crossed for you tonight

Has Tilly done her race for life yet? Tilly, if you?re out there let us know how you got on

at Lal keeping DD under the sofa. I have a face mask on to make me beautiful and I?ve laughed so much its all cracked!

Those with FF babies, how much formula are they drinking per day, since they?ve been weaned? I?m on a mission to try to get DD to drink from a bottle/cup/anything as I?m started to feel trapped by BF now and not enjoying it so much. I think I?d feel better about it and happier to continue if I knew DD would drink from something else and therefore I wasn?t ?trapped? by her. I asked my HV if she had any tips, and her suggestion was that DD wouldn?t let herself starve, so if I let her get hungry enough then she will drink from a bottle, but I can?t do that to her, its just mean. She will drink water from anything but just clamps her lips shut when I try to give her either formula or EBM and lets it run down her chin, little monkey. I?ve decided that I?ll mix tiny bits of formula with water and increase slowly. Today it worked with 9oz of water and one scoop of formula, just giving it to her with food as I do normally with water ? so fingers crossed for me as I go for a scoop and a half tomorrow. (BTW, I'm not starving her, she's still getting lots of booby milk too, but I'm hoping to encourage her to replace some of it with formula)

I have finger ache from so much typing, so will retire for the night. Happy half birthday to the Christmas babies for tomorrow

Ta ra

ZoeJeanne xx

Will do proper post tomow (as ever) but have thoroughly enjoyed reading everyone's posts above -

WE FINALLY WON THE HUCKING VILLAGE PUB QUIZ!

so i am a little excitable. It's off now until October, and it was sort of by default as the Dons team was absent - but still.

Even better - my best friend when I was 16 (a boy) is married to a woman who can't have children - an immense sadness to both of them. I haven't been in touch since I had DD (he often works in faraway places) and I have just had a message to say they are expecting a little one on 19th July!! All very mysterious but I am absolutely overjoyed. I never use more than one exclamation mark so you can see how happy I am.

Night xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxLadyT Howzat?

Ddds1&2 fast asleep but dh snoring so I can't sleep. Ugh. Thought I'd catch up on the thread. Don't seem to get on here very much these days. Crawling babies . DD2 is sitting and chatting, and just like her sister (and me ) she loves her food. Big news is that I accepted the job offer yesterday and also resigned. Leaving date tbc. Will be talking to my line reports today about it. Makes me sad, as I have some great colleagues, but I know it's the right thing to do. Sorry for lack of personals - am on iPod in darkened room next to snoring hubby (there's a wee window into my world for you!). Took DD1 to her school yesterday for another induction thing. When did she get so grown up?

she slept through! I am lying in bed with massive boobs and celebrating the fact that fir the last 11.5 hours I have not heard a peep from either DD. It's a miracle!

Back later after I have relieved Mrs Sleep. I think I love that woman...

Can you believe it?????

Morning!

Arti That is great news!!! How brilliant for you!!

LadyT Yay for winning the quiz!! Congrats to your friend.

Spiggy Welcome!!!! You'll love it here but be warned, it is very addictive.

Trace Hope you get the job!!

I am quite freaked out by all the 'you could be pg' comments because I had a very very wierd feeling last night. I was lying in bed and I swear I could feel movements. Not those butterfly wind like movements but real ones. I am obviously not pg but it was quite freaky. How strange!!

Hope you all had good nights and you are all well.

arti that's fabulous news!!!

Arti thats great ! Now I'm wondering if I can afford her

Woohoo Arti!

Oops, clanging noises from hall, better investigate...

So pleased for you, arti, really glad it was worth it.

And well done LadyT on the pub quiz, am v impressed. What was the prize?

Glad you got the naps sorted Zoe, and well done in doing something constructive with the time (i.e not watching Wimbledon). Did you do anything differently or did it just happen on its own? And on the Formula, t has a bottle in the morning, one at around 2.30 and another at 6.30 - the rest is solids. Oh, and he has one at 10.30 but as we're trying to drop that one I don't count it .

Still struggling with the 5.00am starts, some days he gets himself back to sleep on his own, others I go in and try PuPD, patting, dummy, white noise etc, feed - to no avail. I know he's not properly awake and is trying to get back to sleep but if he doesn't do it himself it seems like it ain't gong to happen. No point getting Mrs Sleep in for that, but any pointers others may have would be much appreciated!

Verso, sorry you were up so early but so glad you've handed in your notice, it's hard when you've got along with colleagues but it sounds like the new job will be a good 'un.

Welcome Spiggy! Lovely to have you join us. I too like a bit of lurking on the AIBU threads but am too chicken to join in .

Oh, and last night's big news (look away those of a delicate disposition). T had his first erection. Well, the first we'd seen anyway. It's the first developmental milestone I don't feel like mentioning to my mum....

spot !!!!!!!!!! ah the joy of boy babies! sorry about the early starts, I'm afraid my answer in those situations is boob which isn't much help.

arti yay! three cheers for Mrs Sleep! and hurray for massive boobs too the first time dd went 7-4 I remember the bliss as she had a massive feed and they went back to normal.

verso great news about the job. will you still be able to see your old colleagues socially? you'll get a whole load of new workmates soon enough

hello spiggy! welcome to the madhouse party what an exciting arrival for your dd! several of us had hb but all meticulously planned!

lal at storing babies under the sofa! I doubt dd could fit under ours for all the dust bunnies

zj hurrah for the naps! but what's all this domesticity? nap time is for MN and trashy novels!

on which dd is now waking up - had been asleep on my lap for all of 15 mins but better than nothing!

Oh bless that's lovely Spot, just wait til he gets his hands on it!

Wow so much happiness and good feelings on this thread this morning, Arti, hooray hooray hooray! I'm so chuffed for you, see you did know best for your DD it was the right thing to do. I have to say I now have an image of mrs sleep tipping her hat and walking off into the sunset(sunrise) to help another tired family.

Hooray to Lady on the pub quiz brilliant, swat up and kick some Dons butt in October.

ZJ playing peeka boo with the curtain, your child is clearly advanced!

I really should weigh DS2 I think he'll be around 7.5-8kg but keep forgetting to do it before his bath when he's in the nudey.

Verso that is great about your new job, it is sad to leave your old one but also serves them right for not giving you the promotion. It is sad that after all these years employers still don't see the resource they missing out on rather than the relatively small amount of time lost to maternity leave.

Lal I lol at you DD under the couch, I like that you put an NB for why she was there.

Kayz I think Adebayor might go. Weird on the funny movements, one of the mums at DS1's nursery had that feeling once, turns out she was 4.5months pregnant!

Oh and Lady that is wonderful news about your friend, who cares how most important is that they are, wonderful.

I'm sure I had some more but can't remember what, oh verso I often see the thread as a little window I have to myself when I'm sitting in the dark with the itouch putting DS2 to bed.

Veggie Don't say that!!

Right I am back. Mrs Sleep confirmed that DD2 did not so much as murmur all night long . I cannot believe she went from crying and crying on night two (it was two bouts of one hour's worth of crying but to me it felt like it went on all night) to nothing on night three. I was sure my child was going to be the one to break Mrs Sleep's three night record. I am not sure why her version of shush-pat has this amazing success rate. I noticed she has a very fast pat technique, similar to a woodpecker pecking DD's leg, but other than that it did not seem very revolutionary. Anyway it worked so who am I to question. Now I just hope it works tonight as Mrs Sleep has packed her bags, taken her big fat cheque and gone.

Spot - congrats to T on his latest step towards manhood . I am not sure what to suggest about the early waking. Is his room pitch black? And do you delay feeding him 'til 7am? Those are the usual strategies. There is also the option of amusing him in his cot 'til 7am so he gets used to the idea that he can't get up early even if he wakes up early.

Kayz - are you sure, sure, sure that you are not preggers?

Spiggy - welcome. I want to hear the gory details of your unplanned homebirth. It sounds like a movie!

Verso - it is always hard leaving a place that you are comfortable in but I bet your new job will be super. When do you start.

Zoe - brilliant news about the naps. Now stop making us all look bad by being so productive in your "spare" time.

xxx