June 08: All we want for Christmas is a good night's sleep!

[bitofasnowqueen]

New thread!

sponge wow (josey sniffs on her laptop)

Sybil try the website they sometimes have the clips on there.

AH good luck for Friday.

5gomad hope all is ok.

Tight to slack waste band is usually a jump in lenght, its a nightmare for boys when they are older!

I will probably dissapear for a few days, while Oli in hosp, will try to let you know how it goes, fingers crossed.

josey good luck in hospital

5gomad hope it goes ok at the doctors today and you get some reassurance

sponge echo what others have said re. your story. I'm another one how had a mc - amazing how many of us on this thread

A woke up every half hour last night . He was the same the night before too and I'm shattered. I really hope it's just teething and this is not a new sleeping habit. He's not eating as much as usual so that may make sense if his gums are sore?

Allnew, Yeah I think they go off their food if their gums are sore - are you using Calpol (or Medised )? Sorry about your sleepless night .

I agree that the sugar thing is a losing battle but I don't understand why they put it in stuff when it doesn't need it - natural yogurt with fruit should be sweet enough for babies without added sugar. Yeah, salt is more terrifying - at least sugar can't kill you .

Good luck Josey How long will the hospital stay be?

Medised/calpol night doesn't go down well in our house. I gave the girls medised when they where younger and it made them really hyper like they were possesed. They did suddenly conk out though. I tried calpol night on DS and he got really angry and frustrated until he finally fell asleep. Then when he woke a few hours later he fed every 45mins or so, so the calpol night made him dehydrated. I won't use it again. I know that when I was 3 and had some premed before an operation I went hyperactive so it's a reaction I have passed onto the children.

G43 - I have heard lots of people say medised does that to their kids. I saw on the pack that it contains sorbitol which I think is quite a controversial sweetener. I wonder if it is related to that. Actually I noticed on the pack that Medised contains all sorts of nasty E numbers and parabens , so I am using it as sparingly as possible at the moment.

The kids have never reacted to anything else and are fine with calpol/neurofen on it's own so I can only assume it's the antihistamine that makes them react.

Sponge - wonderful video. You and your DH are so brave. I just can't imagine going through all that. I was a nutcase for quite a while after my baby died at 19 weeks gestation, and there are still certain times of year I find very difficult.

Sorry to hear that Rolf .

I conceived the twins around the same time the baby I lost was due, I found out I was PG three days before my edd. That saved my sanity. I have two friends who had babies same time and it saddened me when their LOs turned 1 in September. My baby would have been 1 too.

A friend of a friend lost a baby at 20 weeks and then with her next baby she was due to be induced at 42 weeks and the baby died the night before the induction . And they had to pay for a funeral .

Sorry for very depressing post

Rolf I hope you don't mind me asking but did you have any counselling after your mc. I did after my 20 week one but I would just go on and on about how much I wanted another baby and how that would make things better. I would feel really positive when I left but at that time DP wasn't ready to try again so I just ended up feeling worse after every session once the reality kicked in. After my 16 week one I also just focused fully on getting pregnant again and have wonderful ds and I really didn't grieve properly and feel really said about it now. Not sure if counselling would help now as I really wouldn't know what to say.
Sorry about that but it's been on my mind lately and just wanted to ask something who had been through it some thoughts.

neenz your poor friend, that is truly awful

hugs to everyone who's lost babies and had m/c. It makes me feel like hugging you all very tight.

Josey - thanks for remembering the moving date - it's not like you've got nothing on your plate so I'm very impressed. Anyways, will be thinking of Olivia on Thursday!

Goingfor3 - I had some informal counselling from my community midwife although like you I was obsessed about getting pregnant again. She came to see me quite regularly for about 4 months and came to the post-mortem appointment with me. Then when I became pregnant again (the month after my baby would have been due) she did all my ante-natal at home and saw me more regularly than in a "normal" pregnancy.

When I was pregnant with DD1 I was referred to the family support unit at our hospital for counselling when they raised the concerns about her having a brain abnormality. So both lots of counselling were in a fairly high-emotion situation rather than to help he cope long-term, iyswim.

DH didn't speak to anyone at all and tbh didn't really want to try for another baby straightaway and I rather bullied him into it. I think counselling would be very helpful if you feel that you haven't really "dealt" with it.

Neenz, coincedentally our mc baby would also have been one in September. We didn't find out we were expecting Jamie until a week after my edd and I was devestated for pretty much that whole month. So sorry to hear of others in similar position.

My sil lost two babies after the 20 week scan due to spina bifida. It was an awful time for the whole family and they were offered no councilling (admittedly 15 or so years ago now) I was always very anxious about my scans due to this but thankfully we were very lucky.

rolf and goingfor3 i do sympathise - I still have counselling after losing son at 21 weeks (And 2 mmc)..and agree there are certain times that would have been worse (for some reason night feeds just after dd was born would often have me in tears).. I was a basket case until around the edd for my son -not sure if it was getting past that or fact I found out I was pregnant again not long after that helped. its dificult to tell really..

Hi All

video was lovely sponge

Sorry to hear so many sad stories, I had one m/c really early on before Mia was born. So I feel very lucky not to have had too much suffering.

5gomad Hope all is well and your hv was helpful.

Whinegums missed you today, hope you and B are both well.

Hello all,

went down to get S weighed prior to seeing GP, although he has put on weight he has dropped from 5oth percentile to just above 9th, he also has thrush on his tongue. It was the HV that you usually see when your DC's are 2 and above and she is lovely, and thinks that will probably get a referral. He is a bit behind developmentally as well. And in 4 feeds today he has drunk a whopping 12 oz of milk so not good.

Will let you know how I get on.

It must be very difficult for everyone who has lost babies late or lost babies at all, and Neenz what a sad sad story. A friend of mine lost hers at 5 months and I think in her mind always has 3 children 1 of which is up there and not down here.

Hope S is ok, 5gomad. And hope Olivia is ok at the hospital, Josey.

Thea has 2 teeth! They are very sweet but my goodness she suffered for them! I haven't properly started her on solids but am letting her slobber on things like my apple and toast crusts. Or is that what blw is? (clueless). I haven't made any mush for her yet, anyway. It's all very informal, largely because the high chair is in storage (yes, with the maternity clothes, baby clothes etc etc etc). DH went there last week to get the Xmas decorations and high chair and came back with some Xmas decorations and a double buggy which is useful but quite low down on the list. I suppose it's closer than the time he went to the supermarket to get some nappies and came back with no nappies but 2 carnivorous plants from the nearby garden centre

DS2 and recently DD1 are such appalling eaters that I am not feeling particularly confident about Thea and solids, but hopefully what I'm doing is ok. She's still sleeping very badly and being very clingy but she's got a cold and I think it's behavioural rather than stomach-led. No idea what she weighs or anything but I'm just assuming she's ok. I think that after all the intervention and monitoring with DD1 I have a big aversion to any such thing with DD2.

Sorry, very egocentric post but I'm v tired and kind of frazzled and feeling out of my depth at the moment.

Your post made me laugh Rolf - your DH and that storage!! And you can tell you are a mum of four - you are so laid back with Thea .

I bought a high chair off ebay for £5 today just to use at my mum's - I love ebay.

From one angle I'm laid back, from another I'm utterly disfunctional and at the moment it feels like the latter!

I get very stressy about storage as DH set it all up when we were relocating up here, so whenever I unpack anything from storage I come across newspapers dating from my pregnancy (the one that went wrong) and I remember being in my old house (which was nice and organised, not a tip/building site) and how happy I was to be pregnant).

God, sorry, I'm being a real eeyore. Will buck up...

thats ok rolf - you're allowed to vent.

but I did laugh about your dh random retrieves from storage.. did he ever get any maternity gear out?

5gomad do they think it's the thrush that is putting him off his food? How are you feeling after the visit?

rolf sorry to hear you're feeling a bit all over the place (the storage stories are funny though!)

Don't know if you remember me ranting that MIL kept saying I should start weaning - anyway, she has now turned up with weaning leaflets for me . Not sure what they'll tell me that I haven't gleaned from Gill Rapley/Anabel Karmel! I smiled sweetly and said nothing

Allnew - so helpful of her

Poppy - no, every so often he tells me that he'll find my maternity clothes - about as helpful as allnew's MiL!

Deb, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend - donor cycles are extra stressful because you are at the mercy of another person which must be so hard. I hope they find another donor soon.

5godmad, he is a very active baby - probably the most active in my NCT group. I don't think that means anything though does it? I'm sorry to hear you're so worried about Seb .

poppy, can totally understand what you mean about fearing the downside of ttc again. It scares me stupid - but if we don't try . . .

I'm sorry to see so many sad stories of baby loss on this thread - it's shocking how many people have suffered this grief. I would highly recommend counselling - I had counselling after both my m/cs, and before my 3rd cycle and during my 3rd pregnancy to help me come to terms with the fact that I was actually going to have a baby. That sounds daft I know but I'd almost become so fixated on having treatment that I couldn't get my head round the idea I was going to become a mum and it scared the crap out of me .

On a happier note, all the talk of mirrors made me look for this:

"About this time [9 to 24 mths], babies can also recognize themselves in the mirror. One study examined how babies reacted to their mirror reflections. Lipstick was put on their noses, and observers watched to see if the babies would try to wipe the lipstick off. The babies all learned to recognize themselves in the mirror and wipe off the lipstick sometime between 9 and 24 months of age."

Alex loves looking at the baby in the mirror, he laughs and the baby laughs back so Alex laughs even harder - hilarious!

sybil, did you find the GMTV clip online?

All this talk of BLW and salt has really worried me - can I ask a really stupid question? Why would BLW put babies at more risk of a salt overdose? I don't add salt to the veg when I cook it and don't add salt to my food at all. May try and brave the weaning thread and see if anyone can put my mind at rest . Otherwise the BLW is going really well - Alex is loving playing with the food, and appears to actually be eating some of it too!

josey, will be thinking of you and Oli next week and keeping everything crossed that it all goes smoothly.

Rolf, can't believe your dh is still being so unhelpful about things in storage, very frustrating and hard when things bring back so many bad memories too .

allnew, why do MILs feel the need to interfere all the time?!! Can't wait til my MIL comes up at Christmas and sees BLW - don't think she's going to be impressed at all!

Right off to write Christmas cards - anyone find them sooo boring to write or is it just me?!!

Thanks Rolf , poppy and sponge, I'll see how things go but it seems seeking councelling may help.

Re BLW and salt. I think it may be seen as more of a risk as you just give the baby what you are eating so the baby may have salt if you eat processed foods but if you make everything from scratch then you are in control so it wouldn't be an issue.

5gomad I hope you get a fast referal and it quickly puts your mind at rest.

I don't write any christmas cards anymore, DD1 does them!

Puree - your baby is truly beautiful.