April 2007 - There's a place I go when I'm alone, do anything I want, be anyone I wanna be

[PillockOfTheCommunity]

Dream catch me - Newton Faulkner

Having a soppy moment, that's sort of how I feel about being here with you girls sometimes

Oh Elkie - sorry you're worried. It's hard making decisions at this time isn't it? Just vent here and we'll try to help you through. If you think other peoples views will be helpful then start a thread about it - I've seen lots of threads with peoples results in them. There is a wealth of experience and info on here so use it to your benefit. Personally I didn't have the triple test with B (not offered with the other two) but we did have to decide whether or not to have a special cardiac scan as a just in case measure because of dd2's congenital defect. It was an easy decision for us as a scan is non-invasive etc etc - but I was still absolutely terrified when the day came. You just want to do what's best don't you? If only someone would say what is best! for you.

Elkie - sorry to hear about your concerns. I was offered the triple test with all of mine, but also refused it all of the times, as we knew that we wouldn't have had an amnio if it was offered - so couldn't see the point really....

elkie, you must be really concerned. Can I tell you the results of mine? not sure it'll make any difference but here goes anyway.

With dd(I was 25) her result came back as 1:20

With ds(I was 28) his result came back as 1:30,000 or something similar

TBH i'm not sure why we had the test since I was young, but they offered so I just said yes.

They rang me with dd's result and said to go to the hospital the next day, which scared me a little. But the doctor could not have been less bothered he said our risk was very low. He said once we'd had the 20 week scan and they checked all the relevant measurements and if they were fine then the risk went down to 1:360. Which they wouldn't have called us back for.

I looked at it that the risk was less than 1%. The risk of miscariage for an amnio was more, can't remember what, maybe 1%.

I know your result is different to mine but I just wanted to share because they really have no reason why a test comes back high risk when the baby turns out to be fine, as happened with dd.

Sorry to babble on, my mind is all meh today, lack of sleep.

sorry dd's result was 1:240 not 20

Thanks Eddas, in a sense that is helpful - 1:240 is less than 1:250 so they offer further tests, but although that's half my risk, mine is still less than 1%. I think I'll find out whether I have time to have CVS - amnio I'd have to wait another 4 weeks anyway, and both are a slightly higher miscarriage risk than the Downs risk. And if the results scare me this time, then ttc again would take me into a risk of 1:112 on age alone (over 40)

did they actually give the nuchal fold figure by itself?

The sonographer wouldn't talk about that figure on its own but I read the form while I was filling the other bits in for my blood tests, it was 1.9 mm.

well based on my very limited knowledge of the subject that sounds like a good result at least.

3 days later.................Had a bit of lurk.......

And I thought the thread needed bumping .

SPB. Yes indeedy DS1 does start school fulltime in September [gulp].

Pillock. Let's get this straight. Tough - debatable. Old - debatable. OK then, yes. Bird - maybe a long, long time ago.

But Norfolk. Please. !

SOL. Pill. I am now on Marvelon and it is erm...marvellous. No really. Seems to be regulating those hormones well and truly (for now). Ime they all work well and then I just think your body gets used to them and so then you have to try switch again.

Dippy. You sound really down in the dumps. This is the hardest stage if you ask me, not really a baby, not yet 2 iyswim. Try and be kind to yourself .

NL. Shocked at you and talk of sausages .

Eddas. Hi !!! .

Gawd - getting pushed off pc again. This is no good..............................

Laters folks ( xxx ).

Oh nooooo! Someone saw the sausage thread

Hi everyone
Dippy, you need some time off
elkie, sorry you are worried, I'm afraid I don't have any experience or advice but the risks still sound low, and you will get a lot of advice here. x

sorry you are worried elkie

I have no experience as haven't been offered any tests with any of mine

Evening

yeah yeah Pinions

Lunch was good, busy day at work though. Been tidying up all the loose ends and trying to get the filing systems into some sort of order. I've been there a year now, it's about time I got around to it!

I'm totally shattered now though, and I've got an early start in the morning so signing off for the night

Elkie - can't give you any advice I'm afraid, same as Caz, I was offered the triple tests but refused them as I knew I would never have an amnio so there seemed little point. Will be thinking of you though, please come on here and chat to us if it helps x

Elkie.Sorry you are so worried.I opted not to have tests for ds2[they don't offer them routinely here anyway].I know if I was pregnant now I wouldn't have the tests.Unless someone could tell me for definite my baby had Down Syndrome and if so what degree etc and map out theirwhole life and mine and the ds's!So I would find it too hard.Everyone is different and only you know the effect on you and your family.
Sorry I can't be at all helpful,but please let us know how you are!
I f it is any help my friend who was 42 when she had her 4th had a similar percentage to you andher daughter did not have Down Syndrome.
Hope you ok Dippy,though I know you probably aren't by the sounds of it
Hi everyone else.
Am knackered.Signing off soon.x

Evening

Dippy wish there was something I could do to make you better (magic wand?) Hope tomorrow is a better day.

Elkie - you will get lots of advice and opinions on MN, but remember to trust your own instincts too. I'm sure you will.
I was offered tt but didn't take it as dh and I decided we would not want an amnio. My god-daughter has Downs and although it's not been an easy road she has brought so much joy to her parents and her older brothers.

Brain emptied now.

Been to Bolton in the pouring rain today. Never been before - I'm sure it looks better on a sunny day Better shops than Bury. Doing Race for Life there on Sunday so also wanted to check out my route (to the Park not the race route - I'm not exactly Paula Radcliffe )

Off to Tesco now, then bath, then bed. Work tomorrow!

Goodnight

evening all

hi everyone

How has T been today SPB?

Evening all,

Elkie - I don't envy you, all these tests are such a minefield. I suppose the best way to look at it is there's a 119 out of 120 chance everythinbg is fine, which is pretty good odds.

NL - have you got your Kitchen Aid yet???

Hi Liath - yes my KitchenAid is here and it's lovely. Used so far with excellent results and it's very nice not to have to stand and mix everything by hand for an age!

has anybody seen the supersoaker thread?

Evening ladies

Dippy, you need to have time off; this is getting ridiculous. Is there anyone that can take the girls for a night so you can sleep? I am seriously worried about you.

Elkie, can I just clarify what tests you had the other day. Was it the nuchal fold on its own or nuchal fold plus blood test?
I am sorry you are having this stress. x

Pinions, lovely to see you and thanks for the note re the pill.

I need to get my arse down the docs and sort something. It seems to be a real issue once you are over 35. The thing is I may be 38, but I weigh less than 9 stone, don't smoke etc. so don't see what the issue is.

Hi imustbemad. Long time no see

Oooggs, good luck with your scan tomorrow.

Hi Leaky, lovey to see you again.

Lexi, good luck with the move on Sunday.

Hi GM, you minx you! Becky was given a T shirt when she was about 3 with the word Minx on it - suited her too!

Hi to everyone else. Hope you are all ok.

Things ok here - ish. K has a temperature and a rash on her arms, and not a happy bunny. No idea what's up. Dh is working like a dog. He has been leaving home at 7.15, getting home at 6.30 and helping with the girls. Then literally as soon as they are in bed he is working again - even whilst eating dinner. He isn't paid for this shit. I feel so cross.

Fed up with my job too; we seem to attract some utter drop-outs.

I feel like giving it all up, and training to work with animals.

Sorry for the whinge; just feeling like things are pants atm.

Also feeling stupidly nervous. My brother and his family are back tomorrow from Singapore. I haven't seen them since last August, and we are meeting up on Sunday. I am of course looking forward to it, but I always feel like a second class citizen. M is a Cambridge graduate and hugely successful in his job. They are looking at houses over here for 2 million +, have 4 wonderful and talented children, sil is always impeccably groomed and kitted out in designer gear etc etc. I love them all dearly, but dreading it.

Sorry, sorry, sorry

SOL, it was a combined test which includes nuchal fold and blood tests - but most of the problem is my age, ie I think unlike the first time the tests mostly just didn't bring the risk down, they didn't actually increase it much. One question I'm going to ask when I phone back the clinic is where the difference between risk at 39 (1:139) and the risk I've been given (1:120) comes from - is it that I'll be 39 + 7 months or the nuchal measurement or the blood tests? Aaarrrggh not that I suppose it will help but I want to know.

Sorry for obsessing everyone.

And I hope that you feel brighter soon SOL. Your brother's clearly been lucky financially, but that doesn't make him superior to you (or you inferior) though there are moments when it might feel like it.

shit me and dp have just split, what do i do, dont think i can be a single mum!!!!!! help????

Lexi - sorry to hear that - is there any way back do you think?SOL - don't you dare feel nervous about seeing your brother! You are fabulous and your girls beyond wonderful and your dh is very lovely too! Anyone spending that much on a house atm is plainly off their heads anyway and you could be incredibly groomed too - you just choose to cherish your family life instead right?