July 2008 - Now our babies are arriving let's have a thread to talk about them...

[minipinkscottish]

Hi ladies
I know there are many of us still to pop but thought it would be nice to start a thread that we can come to once the LO's are here

Abbie is 4 weeks and 3 days old today and my due date isn't here yet

Abbie is doing great - eating and sleeping and very content. The feeding was hard going at first as it is very frequent with her being early but I think you actually get used to being tired

Someone (sorry can't remember who) was talking about bottle and bf together and nipple confusion. Well all the times I have bf I have done so exclusively even when it was very difficult - I am stubborn As Abbie was early and lost a good bit of weight the mw advised topping her up with ebm through a syringe. This was tough as I was bf then trying to express only to bf 1 hour later - so I gave her formula to top up. Giving her the milk in a syringe became difficult as they tended to spurt the milk too quickly at times. So I gave her a bottle to top up( Tommee Tippee - closer to nature) and it was great!!

I bf her all day and then top up after bf at night to get a bit longer sleep - it's working - she is putting on weight and no nipple confusion

sorry for huge post - hope you will all come over and join me!!!!!

Very interesting reading about everyone's routines.

libralady - i'm sure my supply is because charlie was in hospital and i was forced to use an industrial strength pump every hour for 2 weeks. Mind you, i had no idea what to compare it to. I really admire your hard work with persevering and think it's high time you had a break from the pump - evil thing that it is!

I have read sooooo many books on parenting babies and I am shifting my focus all the time depending on what works. Charlie has colic and I am just moving on to a Gina Ford routine as I work my way through old wives tales, remedies, medicines, techniques, etc. Anyway, she believes that it takes three hours for babies to digest their milk and that feeding again after two hours can cause colic... she suggests using sugar water during the night which I'm going to try tonight. I'll let you know if it works! (I know GF is not well liked on MN but I believe you have to try your options when you're desperate).

Apart from the bouts of colic Charlie is great and puts himself to sleep like an angel.

Trialled a dummy today when he started screaming with colic today and it worked a treat - yay!!

DH is starting to slip back into his old ways... ie out in the evenings... starting to p* me off. If I knew he was going to stay out drinking after work I would've played with Charlie during his 'awake time' at 5pm rather than leaving him on a rug on the floor while I manically chopped vegetables and prepared dinner.

I am really not a fan of GF type routines I think they are too strict I suppose they need adapting to suit your particular situation. Bethanys feeds will be around what else I have to do, for instance, drop the big girls at nursery then come home and feed her, then feed her again before we sit down for lunch and so on. I'm pretty flexible though if she needs feeding she will get fed etc also what about if they are in the car, I've always found that they sleep in the car even if you don't want them to which can knock off their routine that night. Oh I just go with the flow anything that works.

My boobs are huge and veiny now, expressed off 3 ozs tonight just to get some relief, DD1 said to me "Mummy don't throw that milk away can I have it?" so I let her have it and she drank it all well I thought loads of 4 year olds are still actually BF and it's good for her isn't it? Hope she doesn't want it all the time though.

Off to find out if anyone else has had a baby.

SK - I totally agree with you about the strictness of GF routines. I could not follow them as she sets them out or I wouldn't be able to attend my mum's group, go out in the car, or generally have a life, but i am giving the 3-4 hour thing a go, and am trying the sugar water in the middle of the night. Tried keeping Charlie awake yesterday and found out that it is impossible to keep a baby when it is determined to sleep!! x

Has anyone else found their other DCs have just grown up loads since the baby was born? DD1 is 4 on Sunday and is just SO grown up now a proper little girl. Even little DD2 whos 2 1/2 seems so grown up, I keep calling them my big girls now and

They adore B though I knew DD1 would but DD2 does as well, they are constantly over at her moses basket if she's asleep ficing her blanket etc they bring her toys, if she's awake they sing to her, want to dress her they are so good, am sure the novelty will wear off soon. I am making such an effort to fuss them as well though. DD2 is very excited as we are going to get her a big girl bed on Tuesday and she is givng B her cot.

sk - I know exactly what you mean - my boys seem so old now!

happy saturday. we are trying the GF routine day 1 and while we aren't being religious about it, its hard going. my baby didn't read the book so he's not playing his part. I guess we can just try and it and see how it goes. I figure if we just try and emulate how are actual workweek schedule will be, baby can get used to it and I can get used to being on my own. (snif)I am actually wearing semi normal clothes today and not my PJs!

Aidan is a big mama's boy already and doesn't settle for anyone else.

Also MIL asked about a Baptism and as neither DH nor I are particularly religious but I agreed to a blessing. Has anyone ever done this?

Hi everyone
Nice to read how everyone is getting on. Santi is nearly 2 wks old now- doesn't time go fast! I think we've been very lucky. following on from an aazing birth we now have a baby that has pretty much put himself on a 3.5hr routine including a 5 hr stretch at night. Had my first horrible afternoon yesterday when i couldn't ge him to stop crying. DH came home to find us both crying uncontrollably. DH took hime and he was an angel for the rest of the night .

still finding bf excruciatingly painful- sometimes I am in tears before he attaches- just knowing the pain that is about to come. I think I'm getting an OK latch but the nippes are so raw that they just don't get a chance to heal. Still only feeding off the R boob and having to express off the L. Stll the huge advantage is that DH can give the odd feed but then I suffer with boob engorgement!

Ignorance is sometimes bliss- started bottle feeding at day 4 (ebm) and a dummy at day 2. Had no idea about 'nipple confusion' and touch wood baby seems to be coping with everything.

Went for our first walk on Day 4 and to a pub on day 7 for lunch. Trying to go for lots of walks but somehow do not always find the time.

jocesar - slap the lansinoh on your nipples - it really does help! Also bepanthen nappy cream helped mine heal.

Try to avoid breast pads if you can as they can limit the fresh air getting to your nipple and make it more sore. I know this is difficult if you are very leaky.

Hi All, it's mad in this house.
Trying to get a routine going based on feeds every 2-3 hours. Logan has decided that 5pm to 9pm is his clingy time so I have him in a wilkinet carrier so he can hear me shout at his brothers up close and personal lol! Engorgement has stopped now - got the bf cracked with nipple shields and lansinoh (the most wonderful stuff ever, shame it's a tenner)

DH went back to Bahrain this afternoon and DS2 was crying his eyes out shouting daddy don't go. I stayed upstairs with the booby monster weeping on to his little head . He'll be back in three weeks though, to pick us up and take us out there.

Anyway, best go run the bath for the boys.

SK, my two older boys have doubled in size overnight! They are so proud at being big brothers, especially DS2.

Morning all, Alexander decided to feed for 5 minutes every hour last night . We think it might be because he slept all day yesterday, probably our fault as we kept him swaddled and cuddled all day, what reason would he have for waking up? So today we are going to try and implement a little Tracey Hogg and get him into a little bit of a routine. Wonder how long it will last

Donutmum - moving to Bahrain, how exciting! How long are you going to be out there? Your children are going to be little water babies!

Hats off to all you mums who are doing this by yourselves as your partners have to work!

mcchesers - if you don't want anything religious have you thought of a naming ceremony?

peanut73 - put the chopping knife down. You need baby time as much as possible, it only lasts such a short space of time and there will always be vegtables to chop. If your DH is capable of staying out drinking he is capable of getting his own dinner.

libra you have put the biggest smile on my face!

Sorry to hear about your night with Alexander. I would say that it was because of his sleepy day yesterday. Had the same thing here with Charlie and still trying to train him to differentiate between night and day. Happy Hogging!

Peanut - after our DS1 was born my DH had a bit of a crisis, kept going to the pub etc. In retrospect I can see he felt trapped - before kids we were very regularly at the pub - and also pushed out by the new baby and therefore lonely. Of course his behaviour was not acceptable and we had lots of arguments about it! It did settle down once we both got used to being 3 instead of 2, and when I recovered from the tiredness to attempt to resume some normality.
Also the return of our sex life helped, although I must admit that took ages!

Hi all. I'm another with no place for routines- not because I disagree with them but rather I am far too haphazard in my life to be able to stick to one! DS fell into his own sort of routine, eg wake up, feed, have a play, then nap, repeat. But not at set times and this suited us just fine so am hoping ds2 follows the same laid back sort of patterns. But did read Gin and Tracey and picked up some useful tips from both for ds1, will have to re-read and see if any more of it "clicks".

Louis is proving to be very windy and therefore sicky indeed, Peanut would be interested to know what are the other remedies etc you mentioned? So far we have tried the dummy (useful for making sure I know when he needs feeding rather than just wants a comfort suck) and today have tried infacol but will try anything to relieve the poor chaps gripey pains! In fact he needs feeding now so will sign off until tomorrow. x

minkus - i tried infacol but didn't notice a huge improvement to be honest. charlie has had two excellent days though and they coincide with giving him a 120ml feed of sugar water in the night, followed by a top up of expressed breast milk. This is something Gina Ford recommends for colic. Boiled water mixed with half a teaspoon of sugar. Sugar has been proven to be a natural painkiller for babies. Leave to cool and give in bottle to LO in place of middle of night feed (or one of in our case) followed by milk to fill them up.

I have also eliminated dairy from my diet as one of the mums in my mums group said that the consultant where she gave birth (the portland - ooh lala) told her to give up dairy if she was breastfeeding. Anyway, we are making headway as charlie doesn't seem in so much pain anymore... fingers crossed.

Oh - another thing... during the day (and under supervision) after burping charlie i lie him on his tummy for a while. this seems to aid his digestion.

Morning everyone, I'm off to catch up on the thread in a mo, but firstly I need to have a rant and vent my feelings........

DH has really pissed me off. Maybe IABU but see what you girls think.

Saturday we all went to cricket. Infact I visited my Nan in the morning with my Mum and the two boys, I'd already prepared a picnic and we spent a lovely afternoon watching the team get thrashed and had a nice walk and DS1 rode his bike her there and everywhere.

Anyway If I don't go to cricket then the children don;t really get to see much of their dad as he works away quite a bit during the week often sleeping away.

DH did the night time feeds for me on Satuday night and was up once at 4am.

Consequently DS1 was shattered yesterday and very argumentative so I asked him to have a small nap in the morning if he wanted to go to cricket in the afternoon. I know he is four, but if the match doesn;t finish until 7-8pm and he's been out in the fresh air and he's been running around and playing with the guys he gets really tired, so thought it would do no harm.

Anyway, he just messed about in his room and had no sleep. Meanwhile I was in the kitchen preparing the sandwiches, cakes, and the rest of the match teas.

As a result I said he could not go to cricket as he had not done as he was told. I have threatened this before and not carried it out, but thought I must start to carry out my threats otherwise it could be a long summer holidays!

DH went off to cricket and eventually got home at 8.30pm.

Then he promptly fell asleep on the sofa whislt we were watching a programme I'd recorded from the night before. In the end I stopped the DVD. He complained he was tired. I stated that he'd done the night time feeds once.

He turned around and said maybe it's because of my work schedule over the past 7 weeks. (I know he's been working hard and it's been stressful) but then I pointed out that I haven't had an unbroken nights sleep for months now due to pregnancy, cramps, the needing to pee constantly, the night time feeds, needless to say the exhastion from childbirth itself, oh and having to look after 2 children most of the time, the housework, the shopping, the cleaning.
And I pointed out that I myself was still working full time up until 4 days before Luke was born. I did state that if he was that tired, he didn't ahve to play cricket on both days of the weekend.

Oh and although he's not playing next Saturday (he's got tickets for the 20/20 final at the rosebowl, and there is no match on Sunday he asked if he could go out and play golf on the Sunday with the lads from cricket instead. I've never refused him when he's asked before, but I'm afraid I did say no this time and asked when he was going to spend any time with the children. I feel like booking something for myself and leaving him for the whole day to look after the kids whilst I have some me time!!!!!
AIBU?????

Grrrrgh, Men eh? I would love to know what would happen to the human race if they had to give birth!!!!

Sorry girls, rant over, just needed to get it off my chest. Feel so much better now.

Why are my posts so long nowadays?

libralady - you are entitled to rant. that kind of think really annoys me too. it makes you feel unwanted and second best. IMO you did the right thing putting your foot down. Men tend to push the boundaries and see how much they can get away with. I know my DH does! He was out late and came home drunk on Wednesday and Friday nights with no prior notice, just a text saying he was out. Vent away!!

Ah Minkus but that is a routine it's just not on a timed schedule

Tracey Hogg suggested a white card with straight black lines drawn on it and I have to say Alexander is absolutely addicted to it - I wonder if he will always be this cheap and easy to entertain

LL - you are not being unreasonable at all, in fact many, many husbands would think you are a star for letting them do one of those activities a weekend with a newborn to look after never mind cricket and golf. I think you are just going to have to put your foot down. Or even better do as you said and book something just for yourself.
Do you take turns having a lie-in at the weekend?

Hi everyone, just found you!
All going very well with Rafferty. He is a good feeder and sleeps quite well. The sleeping well is probably due to his ABO hemolytic disease - basically blood interaction with mine. DD is enjoying her little brother.
I am just so overjoyed at being able to move pain free again. The reality of the pain has hit me when I compare to how I feel now. Everyone keeps telling me to slow down, but I just can't. There is so much I want to do!

Libra - when I was pregnant with DD - our first child my DH worked away a lot. I told him to look for another job that did not involve so much travel. I also made a rule that Sunday was family day and I would not let him do anything like golf etc. We could go out etc. and catch up with people, but together. Also only one night out during the week! So I definitely think you are being perfectly reasonable! SOmetimes I think I am a bit hard on DH but then I feel I am in UK away from family for his job and he wanted a family also. As such we have to do this together! Your husband sounds like he is very lucky to have you and does not realise this. Definitely go away for a day - I do regularly with some gf's and I find it works wonders. They beg you to come home!

peanut - I gave DD time on her tummy also and found it helped with colic/windy/gas etc. I also found burping her over my should with her tummy pressed on my shoulder also helped. I had no problem with dairy, but a sniff of alcohol really upset her. Have yet to discover whether Rafferty will be the same.

Oh CilC noooo! Don't tell me I might have to stop my glass of red every evening if I am to help ds's wind! I've just got it back after being pg and wine o'clock (time of evening when this occurs is dependent entirely on whether ds1 has been at home!) is already getting to be sacred

LL I think your dh is being entirely unreasonable. In these sorts of situations I find that emotional tactics work the best- if your dh is anything like mine and only has logic in his veins and not feelings then confronted with a woman with a sad face who is saying "this really upsets me we are supposed to be a team and I feel so taken for granted" he is likely to be absolutely terrified. He will run to the nearest florist via a chocolate shop, pack you off to bed for a nap and call you when dinner is ready (Note- only use feelings in emergencies, surprise tactics work better on my dh)

Seriously, he is taking the p*. DH and I never ask each other permission before doing stuff, we tend to rely on the conscience of the other (which might need a bit of a kick every so often) but I would be very hurt if dh did this (as he has in the past and I have kicked his conscience fairly in the arse). Hope he eventually sees how much you are taking on.

Peanut- thanks for the wind tips, will def give the tummy time one a go.

And Libra1975 at the untimed routine suppose you're right! I remember being so pleased with myself when I managed to identify what ds1's sleep cues were (red eyes, stare into middle distance, manic arms and legs) and then they just got more and more predictable, along with his feeds and awake times. Also I love the white card black stripes idea! Have made one and am waiting for Louis to wake up so I can see if he likes it.

He is having a long old sleep so I can get on here hooray!

Need to ask you ladies for some advice too- do your new babies go up to bed before you? Can't remember what we did with Toby but am thinking that I should be putting Louis to bed in the early evening instead of letting him sleep in his moses basket downstirs with us until we go to bed ourselves. Isaidno I think you mentioned that Poppy went up at about 8pm? Lou can be a bit unsettled in the evening and like his brother did has trouble letting go of the day so guess I should do a proper bedtime soon. What do you all think?

Sorry for long post it all seemed to come out in a bit of a tumble!

Hi all,

Libralady YANBU, far from it! I get cross with DH when he plays Rugby, coz he leaves the house at 10 and doesn't come home until 8 (if I'm lucky) as he HAS to have drinks after with the boys, so thats that day ruled out, then he moans that he can't go walking/biking/golf on a Sunday! Bloody men....

We do however take it in turns to have a lie in, or an afternoon nap, and he is fab in every other way, so I can't really complain.

I'm getting really nervous now.... Sam hasn't put on any weight in 8 days... Should I be scared? He does have wet nappies and poos at least every other day, if not every day, and he sleeps OK....

Also DH has gone back to work today and I'm picking Oliver up from nursery in an hour... First time I've had both of them on my own for more than an hour.... HELP

Hi. Would you mind if I hijacked thread quickly.

Just wanted to say massive congratulations to SweetKitty. So glad it all went well and that Bethany (gorgeous name by the way) is here safe and sound. Lots of love from all of us on Jan 06 Post Natal Thread xxxxxxx.

Minkus - yes, I put Poppy upstairs about 8 pm. (About a week ago I started giving her a bath between 6 and 7pm.) I usually go to bed about 10 / 10;30pm so this means I do not have to disturb her to take her up with me or wait for her to wake before I go to bed. (She wakes up about midnight generally.)
I also think it helps her tell the difference between daytime and night time,and it's the beginnings of a proper bedtime routine. The 2 DS don't feel jealous that Poppy is allowed to stay up with Mummy when they have to go to bed.
And I feel I can better relax once they're all safely tucked up.

As for wine I have been having the odd glass and don't think it upsets Poppy. She doesn;t seem to keen when I have fizzy drinks, so no champagne for now!

Jodie - don't panic about weight just yet, but make sure you are feeding Sam as much as possible. Often both boobs at every feed. It is better to look at weight over the space of more than one week. If his nappies are wet and dirty the milk must be going in! And you will cope fine on your own. I promise xxx

sounds like everyone is getting on fairly well.
My goodness Cilc you had a time of it, but what a gorgeous wee boy!

Libra- I would do a naming ceremony, but MIL isn't keen on the humanists..so we're meeting her in the middle with a blessing.

DH left me to sleep this morning with baby on my tummy and I was so sick and thirsty when I woke up, I sent him out for a dry bagel. A lot of the shops are shut for the Glasgow fair and he ended up cooking breakfast to surprise me, which was very sweet. Unfortunately I slept right through a feeding time and was too sick and dry to eat any breakfast. Have gone off eggs for some reason

So now DS is all off his times and I'm still feeling yuck. Tried to express today and nothing coming so just going to pound the water and try again later. Seems like if I can't express he must not be getting enough to eat, but he poops and pees like a champ so as many have said..it must be getting through. Hard work this mummy business!

hi ladies

sorry to hear you're not feeling well, mcchesers. hope it gets better soon.

i am about to go to bed so i can stay up and do the late shift. so knackered today as walked all over town and had acupuncture too.

i think tummy time is key. today i had elodie on her tummy but kind of propped on my breastfeeding pillow and she let rip with some massive farts - including one that was man-size in length and loudness! felt so bad that she had that in her little body. also feel bad that i am discussing my daughters farts online but hey ho!

isaidno - got a question for you - have you ever heard that the lying down feed provides less milk (or rather, they take less) than a sitting up one? when i do that (I call it "piglet-style feeding!), elodie drinks for a bit, then falls asleep. i put her back in her cot and then an hour later, she's up again. whereas, when i do the whole sit up, arrange pillows shebang, she goes for a lot longer. maybe i am not latching her properly??

another general question - does anyone have a pilko pramette? are you supposed to put an extra little mattress in your pram or just a blanket or something?

libralady - YANBU - think he should fix up really - you need some backup right now. its not business as usual . . .

also peanut - your dp is really overdoing the "wetting the babies head" thing - annoying.

minkus - hope you're doing well. i also put elodie to bed at 7pm and she usually doesn't come out the room until 7am. although we are trying a split feed at 9.45 and 11pm now and keep her awake between.

have good nights everyone!