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April 2008 - the one where Scorpio and Millie show us all the 'through the night' trick

920 replies

Scampmum · 18/06/2008 14:00

Sorry if someone else has already started one - couldn't find it!

Much better night last night, maybe due to gripe water?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
VictorianSqualor · 27/06/2008 21:11

sagitta, I agree with denny, I've buggered off for a haircut for half hour and left dp with DS1&2 and then to pick Dd up from school, that was with DS2 asleep!
He is as much a parent as you, make him have a go, just so he can see what you are doing.

Niceychops. Weaning,. Right where do we start?

The research behind weaning shows that when born baby's stomachs are permeable, to allow them to absorb the milk easier to digest. Only milk should be entering the stomach when it is permeable to avoid possible allergies or stomach/digestion problems in later life.

Somewhere between 17-26 weeks the stomach becomes impermeable, and 'seals' which is when the baby is physically internally ready for solids. Unfortunately we can't tell which baby is ready at 17 weeks, and which is ready at 26! That's why they say to wait.

It has been suggested though, that once your baby can sit unaided, grab food, put it in their mouth, chew and swallow that they are likely to be ready internally, until then nature wouldn't allow us to be developmentally ready and we would fail at some point in the process.

So weaning onto food before six months is risky and not suggested, plus purees are no longer really needed.

With the finishing Bf thing, if you want to go onto formula, then you can do it at anytime, it's up to you when you start. I won't mention the 'risks of formula' here because I don't want to seem like it's a dig at anyone who had to stop BFing, but they are easily found out,especially if you started a thread asking, you'd get plenty of replies.

Exclusive breastfeeding is recommended until six months, but then they expect you to start weaning and continue breastfeeding, normal cows milk is allowed to eb introduced to the diet at 12 months, although WHO suggest breastfeeding until two, and using cows milk only for food.

Think that's about it to let you decide what you want to do, any questions, just ask
HTH

Niceychops · 27/06/2008 21:17

thanks VS! I sounded pretty flippant about weaning, was more that I hadn't given it much thought yet. I won't stop solely for wedding day if she isn't ready yet (still don't want to be a breastfeeding bride but hey ho)

Denny185 · 27/06/2008 21:34

Today i have managed to get all housework done, icluding strip/wash/dry/iron/remake bed and do another 3 loads of washing plus get all the ironing done. Aswell as play/bath/feed/put kids to bed [v smug]. Just had lovely bath and about to hit the sack, hmm there are good points to Dh doing lates too

Sal22 · 27/06/2008 21:35

Really interesting post VS, thanks for that from me too.

Denny185 · 27/06/2008 21:35

Oh and think we might be making some progress with the bottle, still only took 2oz but didn't scream about it today.

ruty · 27/06/2008 22:15

yes Ellie i had bad advice too.

Mum2BabyRoo · 27/06/2008 22:50

Thanks for that weaning info VS - v.interesting - oh and for the trauma sites earlier too. I too still weep when I think of G's entry into this world. It really saddens me that I never saw her being born, I never saw her being held up, I never saw her attached to her umbilical cord and so many other things. Oh - and my period started today so I am feeling even more weepy and emotional. I am dying to get pregnant again, but I am terrified of giving birth again. I LOVED being pregnant.

Denny - VERY impressive! I wish G would give me the time to do a bit more around the house.

I took G to the cranio-sacral guy the other day and I so wish I had been able to take her earlier (he was away the whole of May and then booked up until I got my date). G had tension in her neck from the being stuck in the birth canal and from having her head back in the birth canal, and he reckons that's why she didn't want to breastfeed straight from the beginning - her neck was too sore. Poor lamb And she had a bit of tongue tie which didn't help.

Anyway - just saw the time - bedtime for me!

Night night!

PortAndLemon · 27/06/2008 23:20

Further on the gut permeability thing -- it's the initial permeability that lets your antibodies into the baby's blood stream, which is a Good Thing. But it does also mean that protein molecules and other potential allergens can pass through in the same way.

Also, I can testify that it's possible (with a certain amount of luck, and a DC who hasn't dug in his heels and taken up permanent residence like VS's) to have a perfectly straightforward and quick VBAC. There was such a huge difference between DS's birth and DD's that they were completely different experiences.

DH got DD to settle in her hammock from awake last night, but no such luck today . Still, I'm sure we'll get there in the end.

LadyBee · 27/06/2008 23:49

Denny - am in awe. I went out quite a bit this week, which meant I maybe did 1 1/2 loads of washing and unloaded the dishwasher once. Seem to be able to do one thing or the other...maybe that will be my goal for next week. Get out a couple of times and try to keep up with the basics.

Sagitta - deffo volunteer to go to B&Q by yourself tomorrow. I'm sure you can find a way to make it sound like you're doing him a favour by going yourself.

Piccalilli - hang in there, I'm sure it will get better. What is Zoe's feeding like? Is she swallowing all that time or dozing a bit? Just wondered if you could encourage her to concentrate on the feeding by tickling her neck etc so that she's not taking quite so long on those night feeds so you both get a bit more sleep? She might just get a bit more efficient by herself in a week or so though - I remember it happened quite suddenly to Ben a couple of weeks ago. I remember reading Scorpio and VS's posts that suddenly the time LOs were feeding suddenly went down about a week before it happened with Ben too, so fingers crossed it happens for Zoe soon!

Mum2BR, your comment 'I LOVED being pregnant' really resonated with me. In the first weeks when BFing was awful and I was crying daily the thought 'I was GOOD at being pregnant' kept going around in my head. I'm now starting to think that I'm not all rubbish all the time at being a mum, but as far as i know I'm useless at labouring - which is why I want to talk through it a bit more with the midwifery head.

It's late. Should express and go to bed.

LadyBee · 28/06/2008 08:35

hello
I'm sure you'll all be pleased (and interested) to hear that Ben finally broke the poo strike at 4am, midway through a feed (charming table manners). I ended up having to wake up OH to help deal with it as cot-top changer wasn't on top of cot and the lamp wasn't plugged in, but after performing these tasks the stinker (OH, not DS) went back to bed to leave me to clean up poo-suvius.
DS obviously was so happy to have lightened the load that he decided that it was time to break out the champagne and party for the next hour and half before finally agreeing to try a little more sleep.
He seems to know it's the weekend as after having his morning feed has gone back to bed for lie in. Am going take advantage of this and make some toast & tea and head back to bed myself.

Denny185 · 28/06/2008 09:59

It would appear your MN issues are severe ladybee some form of addiction therapy may be required. If i only did 1 or 2 loads of washing a week a would have a small mountain coming out of the laundry basket, don't know ewhat my kids do but seem to get through at least 2 lots of clothes a day and DH is often the same.

I have a feeling that PAL and VS are going to be fonts of knowledge over weening, lots of good info already.

Well last night DD2 had really good feed at 7.30 went to bed at 8, so when she woke at 2, thought she can't be hungry and thought i'd try and ignore her. Anyway she went back to sleep after about 20 mins and slept till 8 . Think she has some issues of settling herself back to sleep rather than being hungry during the night so may try ignoring her again tonight depending on the level of the cry obviously.

Mum2BabyRoo · 28/06/2008 11:02

LadyBee - same here - don't think I am a rubbish mum - in fact I've a few people tell me that I am the most relaxed 1st time mum they have come across! lol But the labour - I was VERY rubbish at, and I am going for my 8 week check at the hospital with the consultant next Wed and will have a chat with her about how and why it went so wrong.

Well G spent her 1st night in her (very big) cot bed last night (for those that don't know, DH is on duty Fri and Sat nights while I catch up on sleep!) and she did really well. Of course cos she always sleeps well for Daddy! But, hee hee, she apparently did the MOST explosive poo - it went everywhere - all over DH, the door, the floor - at 4am! So he was on clean up duty too! But I can't believe my little baby is already too tall for her moses basket! She is being measured next week and I am really interested to find out how much she has grown.

VictorianSqualor · 28/06/2008 11:12

None of you were bad at labour.
Your labour was mismanaged.

PeachyHidingInTheShed · 28/06/2008 12:11

How can you be bad at labour? its not something you can control at all. Sometimes labour goes well, sometimes it doesn't- and unless you turned up pissed (LOL) then itspretty much just luck. Don't compare with pther peopl- remeber that for this good one i ha one emergency inducyion and a 44 hr one too. All that matters at the end is a baby, and sadly ven that is just down to luck.

DH got his tets results yesterday they were bizarre. Nothing showed up except raised liver enzymes which apparently are due to the clearly excessive amounts he smokes and drinks, and the locum gp wont hear otherwise

except that dh has vever smoked, and is only allowed one beer on his evenings off due to co-sleeping, he only has 2 evenings off a week and we've been co-sleeping with one or t'other for 8.5 years now!

he's still im immense pain, his stomach when bad looks 6 months pg, so I am taking him to see own gp in a few weeks.

Got the boys reports yesterday....... well done ds2 and ds3..... ds3

SuzeM · 28/06/2008 12:46

P&L, yes, I've heard of Cupcake, are you a member? A friend has joined, I must go with her someday and check it out.

Do you go to Gymboree? I guess DD is a little too young yet but I might take her in the autumn.

PortAndLemon · 28/06/2008 14:38

Yes, I joined about six weeks ago. There's a lot on offer (will now stalk anyone with a baby the right age in case they turn out to be you) although the deliciousness of the cake may well counteract the benefits of exercise...

We didn't go to Gymboree with DS (other than for other children's birthday parties) because I hadn't got the hang of how it worked re sessions and so forth (also I think the Putney one only opened after I was back at work). I'll probably go with DD, but in a few months when she's more mobile/at least thinking about being mobile.

Peachy, I think you should get him in to see another GP ASAP. Ridiculous that the locum wouldn't pay any attention to you. Some interesting stuff here that would be interesting to consider in the light of his specific results.

Piccalilli2 · 28/06/2008 16:33

She does tend to fall aslep during feeds, probably because she isn't napping well during the day. The whole thing's a mess, frankly. I've ordered one of those breastflow bottles but I think she just loves breastfeeding too much. Really I'm just hoping for some kind of 10-12 week miracle. Last night was marginally better though, she did do a 4 hr stretch asleep.

Denny185 · 28/06/2008 19:51

It sounds like she's probably using you as a way of comforting herself back to sleep.

Have you tried all the usual, stripping her off, tickling her, moving arms and legs, taking her off and putting her down to wake her again? Theoretically if she can take a good feed it should be at least 2-3 hours b4 the next one. It might even be worth letting her wake completely b4 starting the feed, maybe go into the lounge and turn lights on to see if she will take a longer feed.

Denny185 · 28/06/2008 20:52

Just thought (it takes a while for that process these days) if this feeding pattern is a new development it could be a growth spurt. Her increase feeding trying to stimulate an increase supply in which case should only last a day or 2.

EllieG · 28/06/2008 21:44

Peachy your GP sounds a bit unhelpful - your poor DH, hope you get some help soon x

Hello everyone. DD slept LOADS last night - dreamfeed at 10.30, then woke up at 3ish, gave her a cuddle and a suck on the dummy and she went back to sleep til 5! But I am not saying anything too much as last time I got excited and thought she was starting to sleep through she was awake half the night. It was as if she knew somehow am sure...

Anyway, we fell asleep together on the bed this afternoon and slept all afternoon, it was a lovely cuddly time which I enjoyed immensely, though have a feeling I will pay for it with some lack of sleeping tonight. She's a funny little soul though, however much she's slept in the day, she gets to about 6.30 and she's had enough of being downstairs and starts yelling - moment I get her upstairs in the quiet and do all the bedtime routine stuff she's fine. She doesn't go to sleep properly before 8.30, so I just take a book up and sit in with her until she's ready to go off. Don't mind really - it's not stressful and cryish like at the beginning and gets me out of the washing up. Funny how they have their little cut off points though isn't it? It's like she gets overload by the end of the day bless her.

EllieG · 28/06/2008 21:48

Oh and Mum2 - ditto what they said - you are NOT rubbish at labour. No one can be, just bad luck and mismanagement.

How are you feeling today sagitta?

I am SO jealous at you lot bf. Still feel so guilty about stopping. It was just so hard to keep it going with no one in RL to help me and tell me how to do it properly. It got to the stage where she wouldn't take my breast, she would only take one particular brand of nipple shield and only that if she wasn't too hungry or tired. I think I completely mismanaged bf and feel rotten about it still.

VictorianSqualor · 28/06/2008 22:55

Ellie, if you want to retry it s still physically possible, hard, but possible.
If not then stop feeling guilty and turn it into anger, anger that can drive you forward to make a difference both next time you feed a baby and for other women, you are in a great lace to facilitate help, use it.

BTW, IMO you did great, you gave as much sa you could, it wasn't down to you. You got let down. Be proud of what you combated with the idiot midwives at the beginning, every feed you gave was fantastic!!!"!

Sal22 · 28/06/2008 23:02

VictiorianSqualor, I've got a question for you, please: I know it's a bit strange and "wrong way round"-ish, but - would increasing the amount of breast feeds be beneficial at all to Roelof, or does it not really matter? (I'd prob still be bottle feeding occasionally, but can skip formula completely if it'll make a difference at this late stage.) Except for the first couple of weeks, I've been mix feeding, so the whole gut thing already changed. It's just that I'm feeling better now and would actually be able to manage breastfeeding at night too (and it's obviously less feeds) (long story - I am epileptic with no recent seizures, but my seizures are triggered by exhaustion, so had to sleep a certain min per night on neurologist's advice). Sorry to everyone else - I realise this is a topic for breast/bottlefeeding, but I'm somewhat scared of some people's strong reactions there, so thought I'd ask a friendly face "privately". Thanks.

VictorianSqualor · 28/06/2008 23:39

Right. The way it works is, if you feed your baby only formula they are at more risk of things like gastroenteritis etc,
If you are feeding baby formula, it's fine, but every feed you swap with bm makes it better.
Every feed of bm should be praised, it;s fucking hard!

VictorianSqualor · 28/06/2008 23:42

That didn't seem to answer your q.
If he was going to get formula but gets bm, it makes a difference, if it, it doesn't.