December 2007. Laughing, sitting, rolling, whatever next - sleep perhaps?

[Wizzska]

Hello ladies, will you join me here?

Wizz - how's it going without the dummy? we have been dummy free for 5 nights now. Sometimes I wish we still had it, like when she woke at midnight last night I probably would have been able to get her back to sleep with the dummy rather than feed her. But I am hoping it is the right thing to do for the long-term!! I just hope she finds her thumb soon - beckle, can your LO come and show mine (mind you her older sister sucks her thumb a lot, you would have thought she had learnt by now...)

Hi everyone

im not doing too great tbh, all of a sudden its all feeling VERy hard. Like its getting harder not easier

DD still not a good feeder, terrible daytime sleeper, spends alot of her time screaming with overtiredness and has also started waking at night.

Im a bit worried Im sinking tbh

Pecka - soon all the babyness will be over and you will forget how hard it is. I can't complain - I have it so easy, but when Evie woke up i thew night earlier this week god I was tired and grumpy. But you are a fantastic mother, doing a great job with the most beautiful children. Can you find someone ot have her for a few hours...just so you can recharge. Havbe you hair done, sleep, read a book etc.
Hugs.

It is going to get easier BTW

i feel pathetic as never had any of this with the other two - i LOVED the baby stage so much, now i just feel anxious all the time

prob not helped by easter holidays, night shift husband and hormones

shes on more and more formula now just cant keep expressing, looking after the elder 2, house and v demandig baby. wonder if its anything to do with that she is so unsettled.

Hi
Just checking into say hello and hope you are ok.

Got to go can hear DD2 on monitor - she's not been feeling too well, got bad ear infection with a yellow/green pus leaking. Been GP for AB and she sent a swab off to the hospital for analysis. DD2 been very unsettled past few days, not sleeping for more than 3 hrs at night, plus with her ezcema and teething (can feel one breaking through!)she's constantly wants to be sitting in my lap and screams the house down everytime I've put her down (even the neighbours have mentioned they have heard her several times). Been very hard with her and also with DD1, who has picked up on the fact that DD2 is with me all the time, so she has become clingy too. Plus DD2 wants to eat nothing but bread for the past few days and playing up over every little thing........

Am a little better....

yes and when harvey was a baby you only had 1 othert and did you do the school run? because that i find a killer - to get them out andf dressed in time for school

Morning all

Pecka had just come on to say THANKS so much!! You're a total star. And now just read your other post, so sorry you are feeling down. With 2 other dcs to look after I'm not surprised you are finding it hard, I have times like that with just one. And nightshift hubbies....I can sympathise with that, everything seems 100% harder and again that's just with one!

Can you get your hubby to help out a bit more with chores etc to take one thing off your plate?

I agree with cazzy too, a few hours to recharge would probably be amazing for you...in fact I drove to the cashline this morning leaving dh with dd - took all of 10 mins round trip - I felt all young free and single after that

Take care and you know we are all sending cyber support

I had megs school run to do with harvey in tow but harvey was a complete delight - fed with gusto from day one, rarely cried and slept long and easily

hes still no bother at all thank god

if hadnt of seen her shoot out of me i would consider thepossibility that she was swapped at birth

im very relaxed and laid back normally and find it quite hard to understand why she is so uptight im always saying "just chill out man!"

for all future doula clients i will have SO much more empathy for mothers of criers - i never imagined how hard it actually is.

WEll there you go and you see her as making you a better doula.

I fancy getting a bumbo, any recommendations?

caz, your welcome did you get the more milk too? I can breastfeed vicariously through you,pleased its going well for you!

I think all the stress of my breastfeeding problems may be catching up ? or maybe my hormones are settling now Im not feeding and only pumping as and when...

I had megan when i was 18, all of my adult life ive been a mum and now at the normal time of having kids im coping less than when i was almost a child myself!!

I have a bumbo and I love it. Dd3 likes sitting up in it to look round.

Pecka - you are older thats why - when you are older you get more tired

Morning all, big {{{hugs}}} to Amani and Pecka, you sound like you need them this morning.

Clara, there are downsides to the thumb! Makes it very difficult to wake her if she falls asleep during a feed as she just replaces boob with thumb!

I don't know why people get so cross on the G&T threads! I try to stay clear of them. I guess it is jealousy perhaps? I don't know. Each child has their own skills and areas they excell in. My DS1 has a slightly above average reading age but I am extremely proud of him as a year ago he was behind (he excells at maths and science). I am always pleased to hear that another's child is doing well at something. I was another early reader and was reading properly at 4 (taught by my lovely Gran). I was reading Roald Dahl and the Narnia books at 6 and remember tackling The Lord of the Rings at 9 (far far too scary though so only read the first couple of chapters and then put it down for about 15 years...). I still love reading and would do it all day if I could get away with it! Heaven is a lovely hot bubble bath, some nice chocs and a good book!

Pecka - I second what cazzy says about it being harder when you are older. When I was in my 20's I could go out drinking until the early hours and still function at work the next day. Now I struggle with a baby who really only wakes once or twice a night and goes back to sleep quickly so I can't really complain. But my body just shouldn't be doing this at this age. I am so grateful I was able to have children in my late 30's but wouldn't recommend leaving it this late if you have a choice!

And second what others have said. You have three. Of course it is going to be harder. The most stressful part of the day is definitely getting ready to go anywhere in the morning and you are having to do that every day.

By the way if you look back a few (hundred) messages you will see I said I was feeling down a week or so again - and I am sure a lot of it is to do with giving up breastfeeding. Of course I have done it by choice so don't feel the same anxieties as you are, but I do think it produces hormonal changes in you.

Sorry have wittered on and I know I just spout bollox which no-one wants to listen to. I was let down badly by someone in RL this morning and feel a little grumpy and upset at the moment.

Amani - I know just how you feel! Having two daughters is hard as I think girls are naturally more clingy than boys, so are bound to get worse when there is a new baby on the scene.

BTW I assume you mean dd1 wants to eat nothing but bread, not dd2!

If it is any comfort, I am letting dd1 watch a lot of tv these days (like now!) to give myself a break.

Oh yeah I stay well clear of G&T, and will only post an answer in AIBU never a Q..scary dangerous stuff, the worst of MN I'd say! Sorry for those who got flamed..

Well a quick hello and not a huge post as per usual

hugs for amani and pecs..hope things pick up for you soon

Thanks for info on carseats Awen

Buzzy, thanks for asking about ds..no we haven't a follow up yet, quite relieved really although i know it needs checking i don't really want to be told he needs an op iykwim (think 'ostrich, head, sand' ) Fingers crossed for your dd though...

Well we are cooking a lebanese (ish) feast tonight for friends which sounds good but is a lot of prep and ingredients to remember, lets hope ds doesn't fuss in the supermarket and make me forget half the stuff, even with a list!

Have a lovely weekend everybody

Claraq, yep drinking and staying up in your twenties-now them were the days...

Yup I'm with the harder when older I was just 30 with DD1 and a lot closer to 40 this time....and even though I am blessed with a good sleeper I feel permanantly knackered (and after not such a good night last night I have indulged myself with just napping and MNetting on settee with DD2 as I am lucky that DD1 is school going)....
So much sympathy for all especially those feeling down/low (sleep de[rivation is terrible) and those slightly older mums or with more than 1 or 2 especially toddlers at home
It gets better quite quickly then we wish they were babies again

Pecka sorry you are finding it tough...It is so hard to have an unsettled baby and I don't think anyone can fully appreciate it until they have lived it. I know that for me having ds scream non stop no matter what I did made me understand how some people can hurt their babies

A lot of ds' screaming is down to overtiredness too, he takes so long to wind down then only naps for really short periods.

I think part of the reason it can feel like it is getting hrder now is because they are no longer newborns and so we feel like they should be settled/sleeping well etc.

Amani hope dd's feel better soon.

BT i also rebelled last night, fed ds at 11ish and again at 1ish but then refused at 2-he kept waking up and screaming at me but I just passed him to dh and he settled for him (eventually). He still woke constantly but am hoping after a few nights of fewer feeds he'll start not to bother waking...

Clara you do not spout bollox! I enjoy reading your posts and find what you have to say interesting. Is dd unusual then? She isn't clingy at all, far less so than all the boys we know...I always thought it was boys that were clingy as a result!

me too clairey! i understood boys were more clingy.

clara you so do not spout b*! i always admire you for remembering where everyone's at- i forget by the time i start typing.

pecka sorry its still tough. i scond what everyone elxe has said.

macdoo thanks for finding that c of i stuff- i had forgotten all that and i was questioning why i felt so strongly

Claireybee - thanks, I always feel like I am writing rubbish because I am usually a) knackered (like everyone else!) and b) writing in a rush in between looking after the two dd's and dh! Well dd1 is asleep on the sofa and dd2 finally gone down after about 10 minutes of crying in resistance so will try not to rush too much!

I was thinking about your posts the other day and what you said about having such an unsettled baby. I wanted to post my sympathies but not to make it sound too patronising or like I was somehow doing better than you. I know how irritating it is when my friends tell me their children are sleeping through the night etc etc etc - I always just want to say "so what if my baby isn't sleeping well, she's so much more fabulous than yours in so many other ways"! But I guess that's not the done thing to say (perhaps I should post how smiley dd2 is on the G&T threads )

Anyway sorry that was a waffly way of saying that I think you have done an amazing job not to have lost it completely and to be where you are today. I find it tough with two and dd2 is a relatively calm baby, although certainly not the best sleeper in the world!

I guess your dd is slightly unusal not to be clingy but my brother has a 4-year-old girl who has always been very independent and will go to anyone, while their nearly-one-year old boy cries whenever his mum leaves the room! So I guess I am stereotyping a bit....

Oh, maybe some boys are clingier - all I know from dd2's contempories, the boys are usually running around the place causing havoc while the girls are sitting with their mums.

Suey, thanks also for saying I don't talk rubbish. I still think I do most of the time but in addition to the reasons below, I have also lost my brain sue to being off work for nearly three years! I was very admiring of your posts in the MMR thread. The most I could argue about these days is whether Peppa Pig sets a good role model for toddlers (I think it does!)

I know that feeling Clara, I sometimes wonder how I'll manage when it comes to getting back into work!

Not patronising at all btw, and if you have any pearls of wisdom to offer I'll be grateful for them (as long as you don't say "If you do xyz it WILL work..."!)