August 2021 - They've been here for half a year

[BertieBotts]

Can you believe it! Our lovely little ones are (roughly) halfway to their first birthdays.

Welcome friends old and new for discussion of sleep, teeth, weaning, milestones, navigating post-baby relationships and the whole existential dread of parenthood... I mean those amazing moments when they make your heart melt. Or produce a poo that makes the wallpaper melt. Oh, all of them. Nothing is off limits because it's just good to know that somebody else has been there.

Hey, so I finally :o managed to complete the car seat buying guide. It got very long very quickly; I realised that it was way too much for one article so I didn't write it up on the blog. I have made it into a document instead. Now the issue is that it's literally 20 pages long I know that will be far too much for most people to want to read, so I have also produced a condensed down guide which just has the main points to know/keep in mind, some suggestions of car seats I think are good and a jargon buster.

Grab the condensed one if you want a quick idea, and the longer guide if you want more in depth info.

Everything does have a source but I didn't include them - happy to follow up with sources if anyone has questions.

I've done them on google docs (which are text searchable and the long one has a navigable sidebar) but also as PDFs for easy printing in case you prefer that. If you want to edit the google version you can save a copy to your own account.

Quick guide - Google Docs

Quick guide - PDF

Long guide - Google docs

Long guide - PDF

@BertieBotts that guide is amazing!! Thank you so much for putting the time in to that - I'm hoping we last till Black Friday in November before he needs a new one so I can take advantage of the sales!

We went to see our friends' month old baby today, and my goodness I don't miss those days! She's such a cutie, but this age is just a million times better.

@Ready2020 that sounds like the right decision - no point in engaging with someone who is stressing you out. No periods here either and also BF-ing, he's hardly taking any solids so far so I think he'll need to be eating a bit more before they make an appearance!

Yes black Friday is a great idea! I think most of the babies will have quite a while in their seats for now but most people do start to look to the next stage during the second part of the first year.

Other common sale times are may bank holiday and July.

Thanks a lot, Bertie! Lots of reading to do You're such a star!

How's everyone doing?

DS decided that he'll start to roll again and seems to be loving it. Very cute. He eats more and more in terms of solids and is getting good at picking up/grabbing and chewing on finger foods. We've even introduced peanut butter and thankfully he seems ok 🙏 Not sure about eggs, however. I can't decide if he has a very slight rash after having eggs ot it's just coincidence. It doesn't look serious anyway.

We've had a nice weekend so far, however my mind is focused on what's going on in the world atm and it's just so bloody awful and tragic that I don't know what else to say now 😔 xx

@BertieBotts thank you so much for these guides! So useful as I’m starting to think about our next seat but it’s all just overwhelming. I’m loving the quick guide in addition to the in depth one.

I’ve been terrible in keeping up to date with this group and every time I check I have something to say about a discussion several pages back 😆

@PurplePansy05 I’m feeling the same about what’s going on in the world right now. It’s horrendous and heartbreaking and so tragic. I went out with a friend for brunch earlier and we were saying how a week ago people in Ukraine were doing the same thing not realising how quickly their lives were about to change.

We're getting a few patches of eczema recently which DS2 had at this age as well. I will double check it with the doctor when we have the next check up, but so far I've just put the same old tube of cream (probably expired ) on it and it seems to be helping. I'll see if they'll give me another free sample! Although I'm slightly worried it might be the washing detergent as I've recently changed to pods, always used to use powder but I wanted the stronger smell you get with the pods. But maybe they are too strong? My paediatrician is actually a specialist in dermatitis so maybe I'll ask him.

Yes, I think the middle stage of car seats (in between baby seat and high backed booster seat) is very overwhelming - that's why it was so hard to condense it down into something clear. I hope it's not confusing anyway. I kind of feel like what I need to do on the website is make a flow chart kind of thing where you can answer questions with yes/no/don't know/tell me more and it automatically directs you to the right bit of info, because some people have quite a clear idea of what they want once they know about it, and if you know then you don't need to read about the other 9 different types of car seat! Or maybe you're not sure but you still are only interested in 2 or 3 rather than all 10 different types, I counted! It's good that there are options for everyone, but a lot of times the info gets really muddled, and in terms of other sources, it's a bit all or nothing - you get extended rear facing advocates who are all "rear face or you might as well not use a car seat at all!" who will give you no information about the relative safety of different forward facing options, and tend to present rear facing options as the only ones, or you get consumer websites/magazines who only focus on the user-friendliness and often in a really limited way as well so they won't compare the seat against another, they'll just comment on it compared to the one other seat they have used I mean what use is that to anybody? And those reviews often don't look into safety at all, which I think is important.

You'll probably be using this next seat for several years so it makes sense to try and get one that will work for you.

@bertiebotts ezcema here too only in the last 3-4 weeks which coincides with weaning. Using child's farm moisturiser which seems to help him the most out of several we have tried.

Bertie’s those guides are absolutely brilliant! Thank you so much!!

I can’t believe how quickly the days are going now? I think it’s because he’s such a proper person now it’s so much more engaging, after tidying up I sit down at 8 and go to bed at 9 😂 so tired!

Babies with eczema, the la Roche posay cicaplast baume b5 is meant to be great and safe to use on babies- a friend whipped it out at lunch last week for her baby and said the rash had gone down so much since she started using it.

There was a comment up thread about sleeping in different rooms, this seems normal I think, out of our NCT group 2 of us are in the same room, the other 7 (or 8?) are all in separate rooms. Before having the baby we got advice saying make time for each other- so much easier said than done!!!! Especially when you’re tired from a busy day, I find weaning has made it busier as well, more cooking, cleaning and sticking to a rough meal time….

We are doing a short break to the Cotswolds again in 2 weeks, last time we went away we had our next to me, but now he’s too big, where do I even begin with travel cots?! Does anyone have to recommend? Is it worth getting one that’s a playpen type thing too?

We're at OHs mums house this weekend. It's been a nice visit so far apart from the very awkward moment last night when his step dad walked in on me sitting on the loo It was pretty late and I don't really understand how to lock their bathroom so just didn't. The door was closed and light on so I presumed that was enough to show I was in there. I've not seen him this morning. I'm sure I'll go all red lol.

DD is desperate to crawl. She's going on all 4s and rocking but doesn't understand the legs moving thing. It's pretty cute. We're looking at playpens for the lounge for when she's off and getting into everything.

Oh we’re also looking at strollers, our fox is great but for quick trips a stroller would be handy. Does anyone have the babyzen yo-yo? Or one that folds up really small?

@Ready2020 omg I would be mortified! Hopefully he was mortified too and ran out! We’ve got that crawling thing too- he does this army crawl but now he gets up on all 4s and just wobbles and rocks and then face plants 🤦🏼‍♀️ Your comment about the playpen makes me wonder about the travel cot… you can get some with zippy sides that might be useful for the living room too

@Inmypjsagain we got a travel for from Smyths. I think it was only £40 or so and I dont have any complaints. I'm not sure if it doubles as a playpen but I can't see why not...?

@Ready2020 and I are meeting for coffee later - I can't wait to see how much Rowan has changed!

@BertieBotts oh just saw your pram review link, sorry missed it earlier!

@Daffodil21 thank you, was it the Graco one you went for? I was wondering if it’s worth spending the extra £20 on something like this www.smythstoys.com/uk/en-gb/baby/nursery-and-bedding/travel-cots/babylo-safari-drops-2-in1-playpen-and-travel-cot/p/188170

@Inmypjsagain yeah it was the Graco one. I guess maybe it's not a playpen because the legs don't come off? I'm not sure.. we only bought it to use for one night at my IL's but thankfully he's fine in it as he's temporarily in it now until his room is ready

IME travel cots are too small to use as playpens really unless you chuck a load of balls in it and make it a mini ball pit.

We just have a standard Hauck one - all the typical Graco/Hauck/Red Kite/Cuggl etc are much of a muchness and do the job, then you get some teeny tiny ones, which are fine if you plan to use it once, and there are some of the premium ones which are meant to be better.

And if you're going to do ball pit, then 120 x 60 vs 100 x 100 doesn't really make that much difference.

I bought what basically is a cheaper version of the Baby Bjorn travel cot and it's brilliant- 2 mins to put up, folds very small into a bag that comes with it and it's very light (6kg). However, there's no way a baby would fall out of it as they mattress is close to the floor and the sides are tall. I'm also thinking about using it as a mini play pen so DS can be parked in it for a short time once he's mobile (thinking about turning it into a ball pit). I've created a small play space for Leo with foam play mat and toy storage units as well, he seems to like it a lot and thankfully my pets aren't too interested in it. Might buy a plastic surround for it, although I'm in two minds about it as I think he might either trip over it in due course or get out anyway, I probs wouldn't leave him in it unsupervised once he's mobile which kind of defeats the purpose and I might just leave it as is xx

@Inmypjsagain I also have the Graco one, I quite like it, does the job, and handy that the handle on the mattress comes out of the bag for easy carrying!

Re teeth - how long after tooth 1 does the second tend to come in? Rowan's first bottom one came through on Friday and his sleep has been wonky since so I think the next must be on its way - I'm exhausted so hoping it'll be soon!!

@biscuitcat tooth one and two came in at exactly the same time here. No wonder he was making such a fuss!

Thank you all for your comments on the travel cots, good to know the Graco seems good! @daffodil I know what you mean about the legs not coming off, I think I was more thinking an area you can pop them when they’re crawling and keep them sealed 😂 @biscuitcat did you take this abroad with you? @PurplePansy05 is it the Cuggl one you have?

Ideally we’d like the travel cot to fold up quite small, I was looking at a Joie one that seems quite small… so hard to tell!

Ball pit is a great idea, we have a play mat with sides that has a container for balls which he’s enjoying now he’s sitting up and playing- he enjoys sucking and throwing the balls though! Lol! @purplepansy your play area sounds fun!!!

Teeth- first tooth came in and the second followed less than a week later I think. But he’s been full on teething consistently since then I think, so much thick dribble, if I run my finger across his gums I feel so many bumps, I can see 5 more teeth quite clearly too. Just want it to end for him already, he seems so uncomfortable… but it’s going to be like this for SO long.

Hope @Daffodil21 and @Ready2020 had a good catch up today ☕️

Ugh I really hate researching strollers, it reminds me of being pregnant and the hours that went into look at prams, next to me, car seats, blah blah blah. I just want a nice stroller that is lightweight and folds up small but is sturdy enough to do some bouncy walks… 😭

I think the Babyzen or Bugaboo Bee are meant to be the gold standard for those two. I remember also being impressed by the GB Pockit when I worked at the baby shop but I think stroller workshop were quite scathing about it - I think because it didn't last long term, but that might not be an issue for you if you don't expect to use it as a workhorse.

I would defo avoid the Bugaboo Ant and Cybex eezy s twist. Joie Pact might be OK if you want something cheap and don't mind if it doesn't last long term.

@Inmypjsagain No, I have the Venture one.

Re lightweight strollers, I've recently started using my Silver Cross Pop and it's fab. If you don't necessarily need it to fold to cabin luggage size it's great (it's an umbrella fold, a very easy one too!).

One thing I'd say about the cheap lightweight Joie strollers is that the rubber they use on their handles smells awful. Bloody awful! It goes all over your hands and it made me feel sick and gave me a migraine (I tried my friend's stroller). I absolutely admit that I'm oversensitive to certain smells and this is the reason - but I thought I'd mention this as I know you are too. xx

I have a cheap Joie stroller. I can't remember the exact type, but it was under £300 including the carrycot and seat. I haven't noticed the rubber smell at all, but I'm not overly sensitive smells.

@Ready2020 and I did have a lovely coffee thank you

@BertieBotts an NCT friend has the bee but she didn’t recommend it for travel, she says it’s a great pram but isn’t that compact. She lives around the corner so I’ve asked if I can take it for a spin and try it in the boot, the baby zen does look really good but it’s just £££, which is fine but if I can go cheaper I will (having said that on eBay they seem to sell for £300 ish so if we look after it we could get money back!) I hadn’t seen the joie one, thanks, seems to be about £125 so if it wore out on me I could buy 3 for the price of the baby zen.

@PurplePansy05 thank you, this one looks nice too! I like how it folds up… I’ve sent links to my husband and asked him to make an executive decision and just choose one (that way if it doesn’t fit in the car he can’t say we should have chosen X) Thank you for the stroller recommendation too- I’m wondering if it’s worth getting a cabin one as we’re planning on going to Canada this autumn (this could be an awful idea with a one year old) so if I’m going to spend get one all, but I will add this one to the ones to investigate. Noted re: smells and well remembered, I think I know what you mean about the rubber smell making you feel sick, I had these foamy rubber holders for some weights and I felt like the smell lingered on my hands for days, ugh I can sort of smell it now I’ve mentioned it… Bleck.

@Daffodil21 I think one of the peanut girls has a joie so I’ll give a sniff! Glad you had a good time today.

Can’t believe it’s Sunday evening already, this weekend flew by!

@Inmypjsagain It's the Joie Pact that smells really offensive to me, it's exactly as you've described, the rubber smell lingering on your hands for days. My Silver Cross has foamy handles too, but there's no smell at all, it was the first thing I checked when it arrived 😂

It's a dilemma with flying, isn't it. I've concluded I would probably want to take actual bags with stuff as cabin luggage because I always need stuff and even more so with DS. But I think I'm just that type of person who carries lots with me in general, the important stuff and the just in case stuff. So I don't want this taken up by a buggy. I bought my SC on sale ages ago and if it gets damaged then we'll buy a cheapie stroller for holiday use only. I wouldn't fly with my main Uppababy buggy though, it's just not worth risking the damage to it.

What are you thinking to do with the car seat? xx