Baby's after loss the penguin huddle continues

[Bluebelltulip]

This thread is for people who have had a baby following a loss(es) at any stage. This thread forms the third part of the penguin huddle which includes TTC after loss and pregnancy after loss but people that haven't used those threads are still welcome.

@Beaglemum93
@Yukka
@Melpops36
@Knitkitty
@Squiff70
@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue
@FrillyFarmer

Thanks for setting up the thread @Bluebelltulip :)

Thank you! Great idea. In a massive sleep deprived mess today but loving every minute. Baby 4 weeks on Thursday and is very colicky between 6pm and 12am. Hope else is well. Still sinking in that I am now mum to 4 boys!

Wow @Melpops36 4 weeks already! Sorry to hear that his is colicky.

I'm on day 4, lots of cluster feeding but milk is getting thinner so coming in. DS was weighed yesterday and has only lost 6.5% which is great (DD1 lost 12.5% so we went back into hospital with her which I was worried about happening again).

I'm a couple of days behind you @Melpops36, my DS will be 4 weeks on Saturday. It's flying by! I can't believe how quickly time is passing now compared to how long pregnancy felt!

My DS still won't sleep in his crib (our current record is 13 minutes) so I'm completely exhausted and have no idea how I'll cope when DH goes back to work on Thursday.

@Bluebelltulip I'm glad your DS hasn't lost too much weight and you don't have to go back to hospital.

Yay!

I'm day 2 - baby has just failed hearing test which midwife assured me is common but has me worried. I'm also stressing out about trapped wind after my section. He is feeding like a champ and has had lots of wet nappies. Worried about how I'm going to cope with lack of sleep and DD...😬

Can't believe you've all left us already. One word.... Prunes. Get eating or your piles WILL return. X

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue they told me before doing the hearing test not to worry if he failed it because they often do and they're fine. Great that the feeding is going well!

Probably good advice @Rubyroost. I didn't have piles during pregnancy, only after, and they were worse than the episiotomy!

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue, my ds failed his first hear test in one ear but passed on a re test the next day. Apparently after a c section it's especially common for them to have membrane etc blocking them up.

Hope you don't mind my jumping in... I was briefly on one of the ttc huddles, but saw this thread and thought I'd pop in. Alot of ladies at a similar stage, my little lad is 4 weeks on Thursday 🙂 He's gaining weight and is mostly happy, although being 4 weeks early he has a tiny tummy so feeds little but very very often so doesn't sleep for long in between!! Dh goes back to work Fri and I'm wondering how long I'll be able to keep up with breastfeeding!!

I don't know how you ladies with other kids manage, you're all heroes! Xx

Awww can't believe so many already left us. Hope to be joining you in 7 ish weeks time.

Wonder if @boboelephant will want to join too.

Happy new year everyone

@Fivebyfive2 welcome I recognise your username. It's seems like ages atm but tummy sizes do increase fairly quickly so hopefully you get longer between feeds soon.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue it's fairly common to fail the hearing test at this point but most will pass when it's repeated.

@Beaglemum93 I hope last night was better for you.

For me last night was quite good as DS went for longer between feeds however DD woke up a lot and so DH ended up sleeping in her room, a combination of fireworks, nightmares and teething made her very unhappy.

2019 was the worst year of my life and I don't really know how I got through it, hoping 2020 is much better. It's hard to be too optimistic though as last year we felt hopeful at this point, we had found out on new year's Eve that the medication had bought DD2's heart rate down, we never expected it to stop working three weeks later.

Thanks all for reassurance on the hearing test. Was told they'd call me to make a second appointment. Really hope all is ok.

I slept so much better being home than being in hospital last night, but (as suspected!) Little Brother would only sleep on me or DH and is feeding every two hours, for up to 40 mins, so the sleep I did get was broken. But feel ok today.

One nipple feels sore, so I think I need to work on that latch... Is only day 3 and milk not in yet so hoping it doesn't get as bad as last time, was toe curling agony bf my DD for the first four weeks.

DD is being amazing. The opposite of how I thought she'd be - a bit too keen on him actually, keeps wanting to hold him all the time! We've been getting her to help doing nappies and getting him dressed. Wonder if the novelty will wear off... 😂

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue So cute that your DD is helping out!

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue that's cute your DD wants to help. My DD doesn't really know what to do around him, he gets upset when he cries and very concerned if she can't see him when she comes into the room but I think it's linked to the loss of DD2. She was talking about him proudly at nursery this morning though.

We are now on day 6 and regained birth weight which I'm thrilled with as DD had problems for a while. My milk has come in and nearly leaked all over DD yesterday so using collection shells and have 3oz so far.

Just to say things are not good here. Been readmitted as Little Brother has lost way too much weight. Thought feeding was going well but clearly not 😞 Feel like I’ve let him down already and doing a shit job. Maybe tongue tie, maybe he is now too tired to draw milk out. Been in touch with a lactation Consultant and am hoping to get help as want to breastfeed like I did for my daughter. So not ready to give up yet! For now I urgently need to get his weight back up. I'm on a feeding plan and expressing every three hours. So hard juggling that and DD and life. Im exhausted and probably won’t be in touch for a while and that is why.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue sorry to hear feeding isn't going well. I had that with my DD and it's scary, expressing and feeding every 3 hours soon bought her weight up, is he dehydrated? I felt so guilty that DD was but I couldn't have known. Her problem was although latched ok she couldn't suck strongly enough so needed to build strength. I hope the lactation person can identify the issue. Feel free to send me a pm if you want to talk about it more privately.

How is everyone doing?

I'm feeling very overwhelmed, it's coming up to the anniversary of DD2's death and adjusting to looking after DS and DD1. Rang up to book the registration appointment today and all I could think about while I was on hold was doing the same for DD2's stillbirth less than a year ago. DS is doing well but I think he has reflux, got the health visitor coming tomorrow so will talk to them about it.

Hi everyone, I'm at a different stage in my journey but was having a look around, found this thread and felt the need to post. We lost our only DS neonatally earlier this year & have begun TTC again. Seeing that it is possible to bring a baby home following any kind of loss brings me a lot of hope. I hope you are all doing well and adjusting to having newborns. I hope you don't mind me posting, but you are all bringing home hope and I felt I had to say

Hi ladies, sorry I've not been around since announcing Baby Girl's arrival. I was in hospital for 8 days and OH had to deal with our house-move by himself while I was in so Baby and I came back to a brand-new home. It's been a whirl-wind of setting up home, sleepless nights and midwife visits... Finally feeling a bit more human again now. Baby Girl will turn 3 weeks on Friday but should technically only be 37 womb weeks which is crazy!

Her birth was a lovely experience even though it was an emergancy rather than planned c-section in the end. I can't believe how pleasant the spinal was! And OH was able to stay with me for the birth.
I spent the night before and night after she was born on the High Dependancy Unit which was really nice as it was 1-2-1 care, but was then transferred to the maternity ward. A staff member took pity on me the second night and had me moved to my own room.
Little One lost a bit over 12% of her body weight, and she only weighed 1960g at birth so they were quite concerned about her; hence being in hospital for so long... (As well as not being 100% myself - liver functions are being checked again next week).

Because of her birth weight and weight loss and the fact my milk was a bit slow coming in I was put on a feeding plan to top up with expressed milk and formula. I was a bit disappointed at having to use formula at first because I really wanted to exclusively BF, but it actually seems to have worked as planned and I'm topping up less with the bottle feeds now... It'd be nice to phase it out completely but I'm just going with the flow.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue Congratulations! How are you doing with the BF and weight gain? I was so exhausted expressing and feeding every 3 hours in hospital... I was only catching 30 mins-1 hour sleep at a time. It's been much better this past week and I'm not needing to do as much bottle feeding. OH really likes beimg able to help with feeds though so there are silver linings. Keep up the good work, you're doing fantastic!

@Bluebelltulip it must have been really emotional for you booking to register the birth. How are you doing now? Hugs xxx

@lunamoon1 you're certainly welcome to post here, trying again after loss is so hard, as we all know, but there is light at the end of that dark tunnel! I'm really, really sorry for your loss. Hugs xx
You may want to have a look on the conception boards for the TTC Penguin Huddle thread... We all graduated from there originally. After that there is a thread for Pregnancy After Loss in the Antenatal Clubs board too, and now this thread for those who've reached 'the other side'. All 3 threads will be happpy to have you posting on them for support on this difficult journey.

Btw, RE hearing tests... Mine wasn't done for a few days as I'd had a c-section and then baby was in a heated cot and the lady said it can give false results as both these things can mean the ears are a bit blocked with fluid. She passed the test when she'd been in a normal cot for 24 hours.

How is everyone doing today?

@lunamoon1 sorry for the loss of your son. As Knitkitty said there are a series of threads that you are welcome on and I wish you luck.

@Knitkitty that does sound hectic, glad you are home and feeling more normal now. You are doing great feeding wise and hopefully overtime you can reduce the formula if you want to.

I've had to take DS to the doctor's today as he's being sick a lot, in pain after feeds and started to get green bits in his poo. GP said likely to be reflux or milk allergy but he's too young to diagnose, been told to hold him upright after feeds and reduce the milk in my diet to see if it helps. Weight gain is fine but as he is only on the 2nd centile the GP wants him weighed every 2 weeks so if he drops below the chart it's picked up quickly.

@Bluebelltulip I think mine might have 'silent reflux' after researchingvher symptoms online... She doesn't projectile but she is very possety and gets hiccups very often. She's hard to wind and She also has really painful gas and bowel movements and wants to feed all the time (seems to be for comfort a lot of the time). She also doesn't like being put down, and is happier sleeping on me on jer tummy than being put down on her back. This could just be because she prefers being held and it might just be normal tummy pains but I am wondering...

I think the midwife is visiting tomorrow so I will ask about it, but when I mentioned the posseting before they didn't seem bothered and said it's because she's prem and stomach muscles are weak.

I hope your little'un doesn't have an allergy.
And it's easier said than done keeping them upright after feeds, isn't it!

@Bluebelltulip my DS has reflux. The GP gave us infant gaviscon to try but so far he doesn't want to take it. I'm exclusively breastfeeding so I don't know if he doesn't like the gaviscon or doesn't like the bottle. Next step is to try expressing milk to give it in although I think he's getting a bit better as he's getting older.

Your poor OH having to do a house move on his own! It must have been so stressful @KnitKitty. Hope you're all doing well in your new house.

Hope everyone is doing well!

@Beaglemum93 that's frustrating that he won't take the gaviscon. Can you use a syringe?

@KnitKitty and @Beaglemum93 sorry to hear that your little ones are suffering too. In the day holding up after feeds isn't too bad but at night it feels like forever. My GP said giving gavison to a breastfed baby isn't easy and hoped I won't need to. DS has been a bit better the past few days and got midwife tomorrow.

@Bluebelltulip How did it go with midwife?

I've had an eventful 24 hours...
Had to take Wee One to hospital for a blood test for jaundice because her face is still slightly yellowy and they wanted to check she doesn't need treatment. I should be getting a phone call with results this morning. It wasn't nice seeing her having needles in her. 😞
While at hospital I got my follow-up blood test done (after preeclampsia).

After food shopping in the afternoon I had a GP appointment because I've been getting a pain when I breathe in which I had assumed was muscular because my posture has been bad with breastfeeding after c-section... But GP sent me straight to A&E for suspected pulminary embolism.......
Long story short, spent 6 hours at A&E sans baby (yes, I cried several times because I missed her)... After blood tests, ECG, x-ray and anticolagulant injection I was let back home at midnight but told to come back in to Ambulatory Care Centre this morning.

Luckily I had a really easy night with Baby. But currently back at hospital waiting around again.
It is looking like a blood clot.... Sigh.

I've had excellent care though. And aftr being at A&E for 3 hours I told the receptionist that I was getting uncomfortable because I breastfeed and was getting full... The staff found me a hospital breast pump and gave me a room for privacy.
OH has been great looking after Little One at home. I'm lucky she's been combined-feeding so has been okay with formula feeding.

Just hoping I'm not waiting around all day today.

@Knitkitty how are you both doing? That is definitely an eventful 24 hours. Midwife went well thanks, he now weighs 6lb9oz and happy with weight gain so discharged from midwives. Need to take him back to the GP in a few weeks to review sickness, poo etc but has been getting better.