Ttc first baby catch up with our babies!

[Fivebyfive2]

Just putting this on in case anyone wants to catch up? We're all at different stages, so might be able to help each other out?

@Delilah7 @RanchoRelaxo @MrsR16 @thumper59 @trashkitten10 @Bostonfern @crossfitgirl sorry I know I'm missing people, I'm blaming newborn brain!

I'll leave the link on the 'pregnancy' catching up thread xxx

3 weeks tomorrow. Nappies seem to be same amount of wet and dirty. I'm broken today

@MrsH497 - totally normal as @Fivebyfive2 said.
Is she crying for another reason although you’ve probably checked already (too hot, etc?)
For cluster feeds I survived by getting DH to bring me snacks and loads of drinks as it really dehydrated me. You got this!

@ELW85 not that I can work our she's got clean nappies on, its about as cool as I can get it in the house. She's finally asleep on my chest (slight skin to skin) ideally would've liked a nap too but hopefully she will go down ok tonight. Just found today tough mum came over socially distancing in the garden and I just wanted a hug from my mum and her to hold Charlotte. First time I've properly found lock down hard.
DH is keeping me fed and hydrated and trying to hold her if she will let him!

Least it's normal that makes me feel better and not a total failure (constant worry I don't have enough milk!)

Thanks ladies xx

@MrsH497- no please don’t feel like that. It’s super tough and you’re doing a great job!
How was she last night?
I remember when Finn was first home with me and was cluster feeding; I attempted a shower for all of 3 mins when I heard him screaming the house down. I opened the bathroom door and DH was just stood there presenting him to me, like ‘please help!’
I promise it gets better xx

Ladies I'm feeling really down at the moment, everything just seems so joyless and hard work. I know we are all in the same situation so just a bit of a moan really.

Daisy is bored, frustrated at not being able to get about as much as she wants and is getting her two bottom teeth in. She's also now fighting sleep and developing separation anxiety so each day just feels like a longgg battle. On my own with her for 10+ hours a day and I just find myself counting down the hours until DH gets home. She just wants to be carried around or held up to stand and I'm so tired. Just end up in tears most days. I saw my parents yesterday but even that just seems so difficult. Normally it would feel like a break, somebody else could entertain her, hold her, carry her. Instead it's still just me, on my own, trying to do everything whilst being watched from a distance. Urgh. It takes a village to raise a child and this whole pandemic has taken that village away and I feel like I'm at the end of my tether now.

Sorry to be a Debbie downer, just need to get it off my chest :(

@TrashKitten10 - ah mate, I totally, completely understand. You are not alone although sometimes this feels like the loneliest place ever.
Remember you’re in this bizarre baby vacuum where you’re being forced into being there everything 24/7. As much as we adore them, it’s simply too much.
I wish I could change it for you, but all I can do is tell you you really aren’t alone in feeling like that and one day soon, it’ll all change.

@trashkitten10, totally there with you! Joe isn't happy unless he's being held on a shoulder at the moment and is fighting alllll the sleep! Also I will 2nd what you said about seeing people at the moment; the company is nice but it's not a break at all.

We need some nice news!! Anyone got any?!

Here is a picture of Joe after his 'relaxing' evening Spa treatment (massage and moisturising) As you can see, it made him really zen 😕🤦‍♀️

@Fivebyfive2 - ah but look at him! He’s gorgeous...wired, but gorgeous!

I know this is probably the wrong way to look at it, but if we believe it really does get easier as they get older, every day that passes is a day closer to them being easier to read, etc?
That’s how DH sees it at least!
I’m trying my best to just go with it at the moment. It’s super hard though. I feel all I do is feed, change and try to get him to sleep. Barely got time for a 30 second shower!
We’re all in it together though. Imagine if we had some huge communal mansion to share- it would definitely be entertaining!

I don’t know if counts as ‘nice news’ but it’s my birthday today! It’s pissing rain and DH is working all day so just me and the twins!! You wouldn’t believe how much booze I’ve been given though. Will add a pic!!

@MrsH497 Very normal. I was doing it with twins! I literally didn’t do anything else, at all, ever. You won’t be surprised to hear I switched to formula at 4 weeks haha! I hadn’t slept in a month and had to call it a day!! It will get easier :)

@TrashKitten10 Hun, I know exactly how you feel. I can’t believe it’s my birthday today and I’m just stuck in the living room with two boys currently going through their 4th leap, cranky as fuck, no one to help! I saw family yesterday and hated it - Conor became so overstimulated by it that he got really tired and cranky - cue everyone staring at me while I tried unsuccessfully to settle him. There’s no two ways about it, this whole situation is shite! You have my total sympathy.

@Fivebyfive2 I love his chair! Ahh the boys love a good belly moisturise!!

@ELW85 Yeah, my sister says this! She said that in the first year you get over one hurdle only to face another, be it a sleep regression, issues with weaning, etc etc - but she looked at it as once it was over, that was it, it was done, gone! Her little girl is 2 now and is a dream. She’s hard work for sure but spends the day entertaining herself!!

Sorry here’s the booze pic!!

@MrsEG love that booze pic!! How you did it with twins I don't know! We tend to give her formula as her last feed at the moment maybe not ideal but working at the moment!

I've been discharged by the midwife finally. The infection has now gone and they are happy with me. Really loved the community midwives as well.

Agree ladies it's such a weird time and seeing people doesn't always help. This thread saves my sanity a lot!

@MrsEG, happy birthday!! 😀🎉🎂🍷🍸🍹🥂

That's quite a haul! Hope you have a good evening once dh gets home and that the boys cheer up. Joe's been grumpy all morning, hopefully when he wakes up he'll be in a better mood... His chair was a bargain, £20 from gumtree, it was £70 in John Lewis!

@MrsH497, Joe had formula most evenings between 8pm and 1am (dh's shift!) until he started sleeping through that block at about 11 weeks, now he's ebf at almost 6 months (his sleep is up in the air again but we're hoping to improve things in the next few weeks once he's in his own room) Never feel bad for feeding him however works for you guys xx

@MrsEG - happy birthday!! I hope the boys are throwing you a party! It’ll be Mam’s nap time if you get near that booze, haha!

@MrsEG happy birthday 🥳

@MrsH497 you're so not a failure at all! You're doing a wonderful job, though you might not feel like it. The first 12 weeks are definitely the hardest, but even when you get their first smile it makes it a little bit easier! You've so got this!

@TrashKitten10 I'm so with you there! I'm grateful for being able to get out the house, but when no-one else can have a cuddle or just take him for 5 mins apart from me or DH then it's wearing, of course it is! Sending you as much virtual support as possible (not that that will help in the slightest, but that's the best I can do!)

@Fivebyfive2 Joe is just so cute! Yeah, the relaxation really worked huh? 😂😂

@ELW85 I frequently don't end up getting showered until DH finishes work! 😂 if I'm feeling brave and don't need to wash my hair, I'll take Ethan in the bathroom with me...

@MrsEG happy birthday!! that's quite a collection there 😂

@MrsR16 - we’ve got an en-suite so I’ve taken to putting Finn in his chair in front of the TV for sensory stuff and jumping in the shower door open chatting to him. As I can keep an eye on him from there. Poor kid!

Ladies quick couple of questions (not about breastfeeding for once 😂)

Baby bouncer chair things - what ones do you have?

Sleeping bags - again any recommendations and is there a minimum weight for them?

Monitors - we haven't bought one yet would you wait until Charlotte is in her own room?

@MrsR16 thank you 😘

@ELW85 that works! 😊 bless him, I'm sure he enjoys listening to the water too.

@MrsH497 I genuinely have a £15 bouncer from Argos lol Ethan loves it! It also helps him poop 🙈 I also have used sleeping bags but only since he grew out of his swaddle. You can get different togs depending on how warm where Charlotte's sleeping is. I use Tesco/Asda/anywhere that's reasonable! Ethan was really sicky so they ended up being washed more times than I care to remember! 🤦‍♀️ I have a camera I use when Ethan goes down for the night/on the off chance he naps in his crib so DH and I can stay downstairs and have an evening together. I use a camera compatible with my Amazon Echo show so no special baby monitor here!

@MrsH497, I used sleeping bags from amazon at first that could also be used as a swaddle, they're fab! Now he is bigger we have 2 (thick and thin) from the grow company, but only because I had a discount code, they're a bit pricey otherwise I think. Bouncers, as @MrsR16 says, I've found Joe loves his and ours vibrates so it definitely helps him poop! We've got a Chicco Balloon bouncer, but got it 2nd hand from gumtree for less than half price. Monitor... I'd wait until she's in her room tbh. We got one early, a bt audio only that has thermometer, lightshow and lullabies; all fab but now it is getting nearer to him being in his own room (so actually using it!) I wish I'd gotten a video one!! Xx

@MrsR16 - it’s so weird giving a running commentary in the shower 😂

@MrsH497 - we got our swing from Mothercare so not much help there I’m afraid. I’d check out FB marketplace or something like that though if you wanted something higher end like a Mamaroo?
We’ve got gro swaddles that can be used as gro digs but to be honest, we’ve not used them that much as with Finn’s reflux, the head of his crib has to be tilted so we didn’t want him sliding down a bit all cocooned.
We’ve got a BT monitor which is awesome and will be used properly when he goes in his own room. At the moment, it goes on for all of the 10 mins he’ll nap on his own if I need to pop downstairs. At night, we tend to come up with him so I can attempt to catch up on sleep. I’d love to get an evening with DH back though!

@ELW85 we didn't start any of this until she was 13 weeks. I very much bought into the idea of the fourth trimester, so I didn't mind holding her close etc. during naps during this time. But she got to three months old, was clearly a lot more confident, my back was killing and I thought: right it's time to get this sleep thing sorted before she weighs a tonne! I really recommend the book, it's a bit patronising but the ideas in it are good and really, really worked wonders for us (and lots of others if the threads I read are anything to go by). I was expecting it to be really hard, but in truth it was one painful day and then she totally got it and it's honestly been pretty plain sailing since then (well, you know, for a baby!). It also doesn't involve any leaving them on their own to cry whatsoever (each to their own, but it's not for me).

@TrashKitten10 It is bloody hard at the moment. This is an utterly bizare situation. Solidarity mama!

@MrsEG Happy Birthday! Have you got anything nice planned this eve? (Other than getting sh*t faced )

@MrsH497 Cluster feeding is HARD, but it does get easier and they don't end up living on your boob 24/7! FWIW, M is 3.5 months now and goes 4 hours between feeds. I know it feels relentless, but it will get better.

@purplefig Glad the routine has worked well for M! A word of cautious advice - it kinda balls up a bit at 16 weeks. I was a bit frantic thinking I must have eff’d things up but it’s just the regression, currently slap bang on the middle of it 😫 I’d gotten so used to my sleep it’s been tough haha! But this age and leap is pretty awesome - they’re coming on leaps and bounds. So strong! So I console myself with that haha, and WINE. It’s amazing just having that semblance of routine though isn’t it, and having an evening again! How are you feeling now post-mastitis? How old is she now?

@MrsH497 bouncer chairs are great, we actually prefer our swings though - they love them. We got ours on FB marketplace!
Sleeping bags we have a mix, they’re all good really. The Gro ones are great though and you get like the temp chart for how to dress them etc. There is a weight limit - I think the boys were in them at about 8 weeks? Before that they were in the Gro swaddle things! And they were fab!
We used the monitor from early on as the boys would nap in their cots, so we needed it. We have a Motorola one and it’s great!

Thanks for all the birthday wishes! We have a fairly dreadful afternoon as we went for a long walk - Ruairí slept, Conor didn’t. Got home - R wide awake, Conor passed out 😫 I’ve been trying to claw the evening back ever since! Bloody twins. Don’t they know it’s mums birthday?!

@purplefig - yes, that’s exactly where I’m at with 4th trimester! The book has landed today so I’ll try and give it a read as he naps on me!
Does M sleep ok in your room with her napping in another?
Finn is getting so chunky, I couldn’t rock him if I wanted to for too much longer! I just hope he takes to it as well as M does!

@MrsEG - I hope your evening has improved and you have some of it back! Little (perfect, adorable) buggers!

Well ladies, Finn managed 6.5 hours last night... I’m sure it was a fluke, but here’s hoping for tonight!

@MrsEG, how was your evening? Did you get to crack open any of the birthday booze?!

I sorted dh's fathers day present last night; got a personalised book and a biscuit box with 71 chocolate biscuits in! I think I know which one he'll be more excited about 🍫😋

Joe slept well last night, break out the bunting! 6.30 till 12.30, then just before 1 till 5.15. So up early, but it's still fantastic 😀He did stir at 4 and I was like oooo here we go, but he just had a little cough and was straight back off after a tiny cuddle, so I'm not counting it as a proper wake up.

How's everyone doing this morning? Xx