Ttc first baby catch up with our babies!

[Fivebyfive2]

Just putting this on in case anyone wants to catch up? We're all at different stages, so might be able to help each other out?

@Delilah7 @RanchoRelaxo @MrsR16 @thumper59 @trashkitten10 @Bostonfern @crossfitgirl sorry I know I'm missing people, I'm blaming newborn brain!

I'll leave the link on the 'pregnancy' catching up thread xxx

@MrsEG - Finn is great at sleeping on his back too but I hold him up for 30 mins after a feed and in his sleep I can hear him swallowing reflux. Reflux peaks at 4 months so if Conor is getting worse, it could be silent reflux? Finn never vomits.
I’m exactly the same as you though; fleeting moments of smiles etc and then it’s dread until feeding time and praying you can get him to nap after.

And you might want to check other experiences here in case they ring true?
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/parenting/3911154-Omeprazole-Advice?pg=1
If nothing else it’ll give you a laugh when I kick off at someone basically calling me a bad mother...

@ELW86 You know now you’re saying it, and the fact he’s 15 weeks (he’ll be 4 months in 2 weeks) it’s making me think. I just can’t believe how much worse he’s gotten these past two weeks. I’ll mention it at the GP tomorrow and see what they say. I have a bunch of videos of him crying to hopefully help me make my case that he really needs some help! My only saving grace is he will sleep through the night; with looking after Ruairí as well with zero help I’d be losing it without the rest. It’s so hard though isn’t it, I constantly watch him just waiting for the brows to go and the bottom lip wobble and I’m just like Jesus, here we go again!!
I’ll let you know how we get on tomorrow!
Also that thread is so helpful it really is. And LOL at the trolls - honestly, why do they bother?!

@Fivebyfive2 oh look at Joe... 😍 and you're absolutely right! I was reassured by the fact that my mum mentioned that my brother (who was 6 weeks prem) weighed 26lb at 6 months old... 😂 he is now a beanpole! Yes, Ethan really has always loved his food! He's not too sure on carrots at the moment though haha but we'll persevere!

@MrsEG oh lovely, sending you hugs! You sound like you're suffering with everything too and you have two babies!! I couldn't even begin to imagine how tough it can be for you. You are super woman and super mummy!! I hope the GP is actually helpful with Conor...

@ELW85 you're doing an incredible job! Keep persevering with the GP and if necessary ask for a second opinion. They don't call it mother's instinct for nothing!

And @ELW85 god, I've just read your thread... some people on here are just out to make everyone else feel bad! 🙄🙄

@MrsEG - good luck for today. I’ve been thinking if the lactose drops worked, I would push for a trial of a non cows milk formula. I know they’re 2 different things but they are similar and that could be the cause. Does he have eczema or anything like that?

@MrsR16 - as you can tell, I was frazzled with what to do after midnight with an upset baby after about 2 hours sleep so it was a miracle I wasn’t swearing!

@LikeTheFruit - yes, try two towelling it. I can’t tell you the difference in Finn since we put him feet first, explained what we were doing and dual towelled it!

@ELW85 oh bless you! That's not what you need at all, let alone having just given birth a little while ago! People really have got nothing better to do than to sit and troll... I hate them! I don't know if any of you used the Positive Birthing Company, but their post last night with a positive affirmation of "fed is best" absolutely blew up! Women were going "well, fed's not best if it's the bare minimum" or "not if it's affecting mental heath" and there was genuinely someone who said they believed they were superior to formula feeding mums simply because they'd be successful in breastfeeding! I was sat reading the comments going "dear god, give me strength!" I chose to bottle feed Ethan because I wanted to - not for any other reason! I fully appreciate women who exclusively breastfeed or combination feed or formula feed! Everyone's doing a bloody amazing job!

Sorry - proper went off on a rant there! 😂 trolls are stupid and more than likely highly misinformed about the situation they're commenting on

@MrsR16, omg that age old argument again!! Honestly some people need to get a life don't they?! I made a couple of posts on a thread like that recently trying to say why the hell can't we just support each other... obviously being too sensible because everyone totally ignored them 😂

@MrsEG, good luck with the gp today xxx

@MrsR16 - that’s awful! There isn’t a right or wrong answer. We’re all doing our best and working our arses off often at the detriment of our own health. People need to pull together and support, not cast judgement x

@Fivebyfive2 @ELW85 I know... isn't it silly?? I'm so glad you ladies are all so supportive! We all have different ways of parenting so as long as baby is healthy and happy, what's the issue??

@MrsR16 I saw that on the PBC page last night, ridiculous. I hate hate hate the BF police who think you should be sodding burnt at the stake for using formula. I tried to BF the boys with disastrous effect and moved to formula and I’m so lucky the infant feeding team and doctors were so supportive - how you feed your baby/babies needs to work for everyone! Especially when the mothers mental health is at stake. I remember I asked for some combi feeding support on a twins breastfeeding group and I got crucified for it. No support whatsoever just a lot of ‘why are you giving up on your babies’. It really does my head in. If you wanna BF then good for you; my sister is still doing it two years on. But that’s your choice and not mine! I just can’t stand the criticisms and like you say this ‘holier than thou’ with some BF mums towards formula!! Haha rant over!

@ELW85 Yeah I’m gonna ask about the milk. I have such a huge list of ‘symptoms’ to take with me! He doesn’t have any eczema or anything though. I seriously hope we figure out what’s up though. Poor Ruairí just gets so ignored at the moment and it’s killing me! How is Finn today?

@MrsEG - I hope you get sorted too! Finn is so sleepy today. He got upset at one of his night feeds last night so I think he’s catching up. I feel so sorry for him. He was ok after his feed this morning until he was sat with his dad and then went nuclear (about an hour after the start of his feed) and he’s pretty much slept since. Even did a dream feed earlier.
I’m sure he’s fine, it’s just one worry to another!

@MrsEG I hope you get some answers today!! I am so in awe of you 😊

@ELW85 oh goodness, those days are really tough! Ethan always sleeps loads if he's had a bad night... they always make up for it somewhere!!

Hey ladies. Well Charlotte aced her 5 day check up only lost 4% birth weight. My nipples are still painful midwife has given some tips as has the infant feeding team which was all good yesterday afternoon come middle of the night she's frustrated I'm in tears and DH doesn't know how to help either of us. Plus we think she might have a touch of silent reflux it all just fits with not settling st night constant hiccups sometimes coughing when she feeds.

Honestly didn't think I'd worry this much!

Oh and midwife wants me back tomorrow as they aren't sure if I'm brewing an infection in my scar! Last night couldn't really stand up straight.

Would I change anything?! Course I wouldn't she is absolutely amazing and I just love her so much.

Hope everyone is well

Hi all, just catching up!

@MrsEG, how did you get on at the Dr's?? I sometimes feel in a bit of a weird grey area with feeding... I don't go on the bf support groups really as many get a bit hijacked by the more evangelical members! On the other hand, this week I've had a comment from sil asking 'aren't you stopping yet, don't you just feel like a cow at this point' 🐄🙄 That's why I'm so glad I have you ladies, we've all come so far together, from ttc, pregnancy and now parenthood and it's just full on respect and support 🙂

@MrsH497, oh I'm so sorry to hear you're having a hard time! It's always the way, everything kicks off in the middle of the night!! Have you got the nipple cream in the purple tube? It's ace, dh uses it on his dry hands as well! If little one is getting frustrated, try passing them to your partner for a few mins, then try feeding again. I found Joe settled better for dh because he couldn't smell the milk! When he was calm, I'd have him back and try again. Also, don't be afraid to use a bottle, expressed or formula, if you need to! Joe had hiccups and would cough when feeding, we found out he was taking too much too fast. Try leaning back a little when feeding (if you can) it might slow things down a bit?

So, I had a Mr Bean moment today!! Joe did a poonami, got in a mess cleaning that up... Then I tried to clean his neck folds, he starts going nuclear! Start walking him around the room to calm him and step on the tube of nappy cream.. Which is open! All over the rug, all on my foot, air was promptly turned blue (cover your ears Joe 😂) Sigh. All OK now. .. Where's that family size bar of chocolate gone?! 🍫😂

@MrsH497 you're doing an incredible job! 4% is brilliant 😊 Charlotte's obviously getting on really well, bless her! Aside from the middle of the night issues... everything always seems a million times worse in the middle of the night! Sending you a load of moral support!!

@Fivebyfive2 I'm really sorry, lovely, but that story with the nappy cream actually made me lol! 😂😂 that was a bit harsh from your SIL! I'd have probably turned round to her and gone something like "no, I don't feel like a cow at all! You're the cow for suggesting that!" 🙈🙈

Hi ladies,
GP has diagnosed silent reflux in Conor after taking one look at the videos of him crying. We have infant Gaviscon to try with his Colief (I forgot to ask if they can have them both at the same time but I’m just assuming so!!) He has screeeeamed all day. My god I hope this is the worst of it!

@MrsEG - I had a feeling! I really hope the Gaviscon works for you; it didn’t touch the sides with Finn but they are all different. I’m here if you want to ask anything; I feel like an expert now! X

@MrsEG gaviscon's working wonders with Ethan! He's much happier (unless he's hungry... 🙄) now than he was this time last week! I hope it works for Conor...

@MrsR16 - it’s great the Gaviscon is working for you too!
Finn hasn’t had too bad a day but he had mostly been asleep...

Morning ladies!

@MrsR16, that's OK, I was laughing about it it with dh last night 😀

@MrsEG, glad the Dr was helpful! A friend of mine had to give gaviscon to his daughter and also gave some lactalose for the constipation, but I think they had that from the Dr as well. My NCT friend also uses that combination.

I had a cry last night ☹️ Joe just does not sleep!! We have a routine and I was so hopeful last night; he was really calm throughout, even went to sleep on his own instead of feeding to sleep! He'd napped OK in the day. Anyway... Fell asleep at 8 and was up at 10.30. It was 12.45 by the time he was down again and I could sleep. He then woke 4 till 4.30 and was up wide awake again at 5.30!! We keep the room dark and quiet etc. I feel terrible moaning when you ladies have problems with reflux /colic etc because we don't have that, he's generally pretty happy but he just will not sleep and I feel like I must be doing something really wrong but can't figure out what?! Dh has started hinting about putting him in his own room early (only 3 weeks to be fair) but I just can't and to be honest I'm dreading it anyway; I don't think he'll magically start sleeping then, I'll probably just be up more! Co sleeping is also a no as I don't think it will help as I can't feed laying down and Joe really fidgets! Sometimes I think going to formula could help, but if it doesn't then that's just more faff with bottles and weaning him etc. I think I'm too tired to think of a proper plan to be honest.

@ELW85 I cherished those sleepy days back when Ethan was little! I didn't care what had to be done around the house - if he was asleep, so was I! Glad to hear that yesterday was a good day for little Finn 😊

@Fivebyfive2 morning lovely!! Sorry to hear you had a rough night! You're not doing anything wrong at all - some babies just don't sleep! Everything I've seen advises that most babies don't sleep through by 6 months old... certainly not an expert by any means, but he's not overtired is he? Or it could be the complete opposite and he might be sleeping too much during the day? Sorry - I'm not actually any help at all!!

@MrsR16, thanks sweet! I honestly don't expect him to sleep through and if it was just a few short wakings or 1 bigger one I'd be OK, but when he has nights when he does both it's just ridiculous! I have no idea how he's not really grumpy in the day with such rubbish sleep at night! I blame the genes, apparently my brother and me were awful sleepers and so was my dad. I don't think he's over tired, but now you mention it I gave noticed the last few days he's staying awake longer; more like 2.5 hours instead of 2 etc. Maybe today I'll try to have him awake and playing for longer at a time? I think we're going to try and put a plan together for when he goes in his room - more strict routine, maybe get something set up so his sounds play all night and also I've said I'll try to intervene less. Not leave him to cry but just leave him if he's just awake. It's pointless doing that when he is right next to us at the moment though!

@Fivebyfive2 Try not to cry, you're not doing anything wrong. I was in the same place as you about a month ago as Daisy approached 6 months and was still waking 6+ times a night. She also was terrible at napping and would wake after half an hour. I had a cry as well reading about tiny babies sleeping through wondering what I could be doing wrong. But babies are all different and all learn things at different paces. Some people are lucky and have babies that sleep through from a few weeks but others have babies that take longer to master longer stretches of sleep. Just like some of us have colicky babies, or high needs babies, or babies that are slower to roll, sit up or crawl. It's hellish though and you're amazing for managing nearly 6 months of horribly broken sleep.

Daisy is- touch wood- now sleeping 11 hours solid at night and has two long naps, a huge transformation in the space of a month. I took away her dummy as she was relying on this to go back to sleep, then I bought a continuous white noise machine as her dream sheep only lasted 20 or so minutes and put her in her own dark room as we were disturbing her every night brushing teeth, getting into bed etc. I can't pinpoint if any one thing was the turning point or if she just reached the point of being ready but after a few days she was sleeping so much better.

@stormtrooperjulian Really interesting that Dex got more sicky initially with weaning but relieved to hear he's got better. Hopefully we follow the same pattern as all these food sicks are pretty grim 🙈

@Fivebyfive2 Oh hun! It’s not your fault at all. All babies are totally different. The twins first slept through at 10 weeks but my niece didn’t until she was 17 months; they all get there in their own time. I did do sleep training with the boys though - things that definitely helped were blackout blinds - make the room like it’s midnight, as dark as possible. You can get cheap stick on ones like the GroAnywhere blind. White noise and lots of it, and quite loud! They say it should be as loud as if you were hoovering etc. Consistent routine - once we set the bath and bed routine at the same time they would zonk out. Also as mentioned above read tiredness cues in the day and try not to overstimulate - I have days with the boys sometimes where all I really do with them is just walk them around the house as they’re too tired for something as exciting as the playmat! Joe will get there.

So the Gaviscon has done bugger all so far, Conor is just inconsolable today. I’m literally losing my mind. I have another baby who is just being so ignored. He’s going back to the GP tomorrow; luckily she has been wonderful, video calling and checking in.