July 2016 #2

[Bluebell20]

A new thread as we (hopefully) move towards longer sleeps and lovely little smiles!

Cheery I'm still here. Not much to report with regards to Ben. He's an absolute gem. We've just moved up to the 3 month + teats and he's feeding well.

DD is being a real pain, lots of whinging and whining, messing around with food at tea time, deliberately trying to hurt Ben, DH and me. I'm hoping it's just a phase!!

On the weight loss front. My lovely parents brought me a Fitbit a couple of weeks ago to help me try and up my activity. I'm now walking the preschool run so thats an hours walk twice a day and then trying to add in walking anywhere I can. I've lost 3lb so far. I'm also tracking my calories and water intake. Still got a long way to go but I'm enjoying it.

I'm here!! I'm sorry I've had a few days if not being able to do anything as the girls driving me nuts!! I'm horrendous at FB so I'll stay here if you'll have me

juflin we aren't not too old to say lol! I'm 31 and say it a lot! I'm not sure I'll make the London meet up. Purely because having the two little ones on my own is quite hard currently! But I'll see how I feel in November

blue you're rocking the feeding! So much admiration for you for what you've been through. I'd like to pick your brain if possible... I want to start expressing in the morning to get a supply in the freezer as I'd like to try get my hair done and have a few drinks on my bday in October! Plus I'm keen to try getting Grace to take a bottle sooner than later. Anyway due to time constraints I'll struggle to express loads each day i think. I was thinking of trying to express 75-100ml each day if I can manage it. Could I combine two days worth in a bag and freeze it on the second day? If I left the first days in the fridge? Or would I need to freeze it on the day? any tips appreciated!!

cookies well done on the weight loss! What are you doing? becks that's awesome! I had two really good weeks but fallen off the wagon this last week. How old is your oldest? We're having the exact same trouble re food at dinner time and I worry she's going to bed hungry. She just wants to eat fruit and crisps!! Driving me crazy.

elfen welcome! Sounds like you're doing well after a hard time. My DH also gaffs around in the garage ALOT whilst I'm having two girls crying at me! I think you've done the right thing. I guess some people need it spelling out!

dats thank you for thinking of me. Things are ok. I cry everyday and miss my mum so much. It's been two months but I still feel like she's down the road and is just busy so I'm not seeing her. I'm finding it hard to properly grieve but I'm doing my best. How's the house going?

Grace is 7 weeks now! She's pretty good and is sleeping ok ish. I tend to get a least one 3/4 hour chunk a night which is amazing! Dd1 only slept for 20/30 mins at a time at this point so I appreciate his lucky I am. She continues to grow like a monster! Can't get any 0-3 on her at all now. I even had her in a 6-9 month jumper yesterday and it didn't swamp her. I feel robbed as its my last baby so want to keep her little for long as poss! Here are my newborn to now pics!

Hi all, I'm still here too! Staying with the in-laws this week and only have patchy internet connection but just checking in.

Am a proud mummy at the moment as we've had success with the travel cot and E has been sleeping fairly well away from home. I was really worried he'd keep everyone awake at night with his reflux!

It's getting frustrating though trying to keep a loose routine going away from home. MIL is fab with E but sometimes doesn't see he needs a bit of quiet time rather than overstimulation.

How much does Grace weigh Anna? Elliott is 9 weeks and still has plenty of room in his 0-3m. He's nicely in proportion right now though but daddy is 6ft 3 so I'm expecting him to be long legged too!

Well done on the weight loss becks 2 hours walking a day will make a huge difference. It's hard to keep active when you have to spend several hours a day sat feeding.

Great that breastfeeding is going well now bluebell, your determination to continue has really paid off you just need to channel that energy into the novel and then we can all say "we knew Bluebell before her book made millions"! Enjoy your afternoon to yourself, it's such a luxury now isn't it!

Can't make any meet ups I'm afraid as I live slap bang middle of the country but I hope you all have a great time and I'm sure it'll be really interesting to put real names/faces to the usernames!

Oooh and thanks for the reminder about the aldi baby event mrsrolly. Am planning to stock up on size 3 nappies and tommee tippee bottles. Those cellular blankets are lovely too and great value.

Anna, I'm not sure if official advice but I frequently freeze milk after it's been in the fridge for 24 hrs. It is good for 3-6 days in the fridge, and I figure that when I thaw it I'll be using it quite quickly - certainly within a day - so that seems well within the limits to me.

However it is totally fine to freeze the milk straight away and then add to it - as long as you am adding less than the amount you originally froze. Say you expressed 100ml on Monday, you could freeze it straight away and then add 75ml directly to the frozen bag on Tuesday.

The other option is to sterilise an ice cube tray and freeze the milk in cubes, which you then seal in a bag. That could be an easy way of adding small amounts to the freezer. You would want to check how much liquid each cube holds first so that you know how many milk cubes to thaw for a feed!

Super work on the weight loss becks! I've still got at least 6lb to lose (ideally I'd like to be the weight I was at uni which would mean losing 8lb) and I'm dubious about it coming off - the initial shedding has slowed right down now so it's time to work at it!

sunday ha, wouldn't that be lovely? DH's eyes nearly fell out of his head when he heard how much some of the authors that I edit earn. He is threatening to lock me in a room until I finish a book myself! Nothing like the promise of a bit of spondoolies for engendering support from your spouse, eh?! I would be extremely happy if I managed to earn more than 10k from a finished book, myself. It's so rare to make a viable living from fiction writing!

Anna DD is 3 (4in January). She'll have days when she's fine and other days when she's horrid. She messes around with food when it's not something she wants (casserole last night) she's fine if it's fish fingers and chips!!!

Sunday thanks, i'm trying to combine the walking with things were doing anyway so school run, gym club, popping to the shops or in town. Ben's a little star, he either sleeps or has a good look around. I've got a buggy board for DD so I don't have her moaning 'it's a long way!!!' All the time.

Well done on keeping a routine while with parents. We go to mine most Sunday's. I usually go to another room or sit in the corner if I'm feeding Ben but my mum and dad come over and start dancing and making silly faces trying to get him to laugh. I had to say 'bugger off' the other day. I'm sure they forget what it was like!

Sunday I'm getting her weighed tomorrow as they couldn't do it at 6 weeks so will let you know! She was 8.9 st birth and is very long! Her legs and feet are too big for most of the baby grows. DD1 was 1oz heavier st birth but is much more petite. She's always in the size down from her age. They're all just different shapes I guess!

Oh becks how annoying re casserole. I couldn't even get chips down the other night!!! Great plan with walking I've been doing that too. It's a good with out pushing two especially if I get shopping in the basket! I've got 10lbs Till pre pregnancy but want to lose another stone after that to get close to wedding weight! Maybe those who want to we could start doing a Friday results? Whether it's weight, inches, clothes?

blue thank you!! That's so helpful. I'm going to start tomorrow morning. I used to express every day with dd1 so I had plenty in the freezer for when it was needed. I'd like to get some up again so when I'm ready to leave Gracie I can! Hoping to go to work Xmas party in Dec as my first night off!

Anyone else planning to leave bubs for anything soon? I want my hair doing but could take her with me as she's super easy!

I can't watch the bloody lion king one more time!!! Pushing beauty and the beast on dd1 now... Annoyed she doesn't like real housewives though

Anna I've literally just paid my deposit on my work Christmas lunch, haha! Bring on the beer (and the breast pump).

Bluebell novel-writing sounds exciting! Have you already got plot & characters? Really pleased to hear that bf is going better, what a relief and reward for that perseverance. I am well jel of your Thurs afternoon 'off'. What's a bullet journal? If it's a record of all the times you want to shoot yourself in the head each day, I may start one myself fuck off hormones

becks, Anna and anyone else with more than one, can we please share some kids food ideas!! I am sick of everything being some variation or combination of bread/cheese/pasta/tomato/peas/sweetcorn!!! I've just made a batch of tomato sauce with lots of veg in 'hidden veg', I swore I'd never be one of those mothers which will be helpful but I am bored of the same routine and scrabbling around each day deciding what to give her. She's veggie like me, but please tell me what you feed yours, as I can adapt stuff!!!

Also, I think Joss is bloody teething, WTAF??? He's not even 10w, it's a bit flippin soon isn't it? Dribbly, chewing fists and a couple of tiny white bumps on his lower gums - say it isn't so!!

I have more to say but on phone and tennis elbow not helping xx

Sorry I seem to have dropped off the thread again. Had bad news about my best friends partner (husband really as they got married a week and a half ago.) He was diagnosed with stomach cancer just over a month ago and sadly passed away in the early hours of Monday morning. He was 33. I'm really struggling knowing what to do for her and to be a good friend. I want to be there for her but I don't want to throw myself either. Mum had said she can take the wee man at anytime to let me away. May suggest a shopping trip to try to keep her occupied and busy.

I've to go into work on Friday. It's census time and they've asked all maternity leaves to take one of their KIT days to go into school. I don't know how I'll cope but I'm planning on being in at quarter to 9 and leaving on the bell at 3! I was just asked on Monday morning so I suppose I'm lucky to have a built in babysitter nearby!

I'm hoping for a haircut soon too - it's something we're working up to, DH being left with the wee man for a whole 3 hours!

Here's my wee guy chilling out this morning!

Sorry I seem to have dropped off the thread again. Had bad news about my best friends partner (husband really as they got married a week and a half ago.) He was diagnosed with stomach cancer just over a month ago and sadly passed away in the early hours of Monday morning. He was 33. I'm really struggling knowing what to do for her and to be a good friend. I want to be there for her but I don't want to throw myself either. Mum had said she can take the wee man at anytime to let me away. May suggest a shopping trip to try to keep her occupied and busy.

I've to go into work on Friday. It's census time and they've asked all maternity leaves to take one of their KIT days to go into school. I don't know how I'll cope but I'm planning on being in at quarter to 9 and leaving on the bell at 3! I was just asked on Monday morning so I suppose I'm lucky to have a built in babysitter nearby!

I'm hoping for a haircut soon too - it's something we're working up to, DH being left with the wee man for a whole 3 hours!

Here's my wee guy chilling out this morning!

Socktastic I thought KIT days had to be agreed by both employer and employee, so they can ask, but you can say no without expecting any complaint from them?

So sorry to hear about your friends husband, it is an awful thing to have happened. When my FIL died in similar circumstances, my MIL had lots of people bring round meals that could be easily reheated and served. It really helped her as no one felt much like food shopping or cooking. Maybe that might be an idea to help your friend?

Anna I'm up for a friend results thing. Weigh in for me is on a Thursday so it's suits me. Shall we start this week??

Dats if DD is being good she'll eat most things, we do curry, casserole, roast dinner, pasta and meatballs. Easy teas are scrambled eggs with toast or chips, fish fingers/sausage with chips or roasties and veg, she likes fish cakes (the big thick expensive ones!) I make cauliflower cheese with cauliflower, broccoli, carrots and peas then mix with pasta, chilli con carne with rice and a few tortilla crisps, mild spice fajitas. I'll have a think what else we have.

Sock that's so sad about your friends husband. I can't imagine what's she's going through.

speak thats great advice thanks. I'm planning on making batches of soups and pasta sauces this weekend anyway so I'll make double. I'm going to go shopping with her tomorrow now too so hoping it proves a bit of distraction.

The KIT days are in agreement with the school but I thought I might as well. Plus (and this is where I become really anal) The 3 months at the end of maternity leave I won't get paid for. As I have 10 KIT days, I was wondering how I would spread them. Now I can evenly do 3 days a month in the last 3 months. How sad!!!

Everyone loves a milk coma pic right??

Anna Hope the expressing goes well! I am leaving DH in charge of Ru twice a week, starting tomorrow afternoon, so I can write - but mostly we will all still be in the house together. Got a haircut booked for mid October but that's in the village so not too far away if disaster strikes. What is scaring me a bit (okay a lot) is going to see my brother play this gig in Portsmouth at the end of October and leaving Ru behind with DH. I am irrationally afraid that I might die in a car crash! Arrrrggghhh paranoia.

dats yup, plot and characters pretty much nailed - I have thought about it a lot during feeds and expressing. Except I need to find myself a red herring baddie! And I need to stitch up a couple of gaping plot holes. But the basic idea is there, and I have planned out the first dozen chapters. A bullet journal is basically a DIY diary/planner that you customise to your needs, rather than buying one that doesn't quite suit you. The basic idea is quick and simple, but people on Instagram and Pinterest make them beyooooootiful and I have been ensnared in the spell of their hand-drawn loveliness. So far I have drawn up a year-to-view planner including birthdays, a double-page spread for October, a 'books I have read' record page, a 'novel progress' tracker, and a monthly tasks check list. I live in hope that it will organise me but really I'm just enjoying the colouring in. Very therapeutic. I attach a couple of pages here, the designs of which I pretty much nicked from other places. Am too tired to come up with my own!!!

Also, Ruben is really dribbly and chewy. I have been inspecting his gums and can see a bit of a ridge in the lower one but don't really know what I'm looking for.

sock so sorry to hear your sad news. I agree with Speak, meals are amazingly helpful at such times. I will never forget what a friend of mine brought over after my mum died - a couple of gorgeous Marks and Sparks ready meals and a framed photograph of my mum and I looking really happy that was taken on my seventeenth birthday. Sounds a bit weird maybe, but it really touched me and I have kept that photo up in every house I have lived in since. Maybe you could also give her some relaxing things - a scented candle and some luxury bath stuff? I think I would appreciate that but it's hard to know without knowing your friend.

Anna I am up for a weigh in.

sock another thing I've never forgotten... A friend at uni who told me it was okay to be sad around him and our other friends - that I didn't need to put a brave face on it, or worry about bringing them down. (Still not sure how he knew I was worrying about that as I never said anything - bloody perceptive for a 19 year old boy!) It really helped to know that he wasn't expecting me to crack on like normal.

I also had a friend who gave me a case on the first anniversary of her death, in the anticipation of the flowers other people would give me. That was also a boy! I know some good boys, right?!

A vase. Not a case. A case for flowers would somewhat miss the point of flowers...

Thank you blue I'll report back tomorrow on expressing progress the novel sounds fab and great to have a break from being a mum. I think I need to start lol waving Grace a bit. She's stuck to me constantly bar when I shower or have to do nappy /food/bath for dd1. It's becoming really overwhelming and I just want to be able to do a few things solo (mainly use the loo and eat dinner!) I'll moan in years to come that I miss the cuddles though!!

sock I am so sorry. Life is so cruel. All you can do is be there for your friend. Maybe you can help with funeral? Agree with speak abut food. I also think evenings must be the lovely times so maybe try pop round then with dinner?

becks lets do Thursdays then! I need to get back into it was doing well but my sugar cravings are out of control!!!

dats I'm rubbish with dinners. DD1 is dairy and gluten free so I'm a bit limited. She loves fish cakes, pasta, salmon, sweet potato wedges, sweet potato mash, jacket pot and beans...she turns her nose up at things like cottage pie, lasagne. That pisses me off as have to make her special ones that end up being thrown on the floor she won't war bread or cereal so breakfast is normally fruit or some boiled eggs! ideally I'd like her to get into currys, stir frys as easy and we can all eat it! I'm very lucky though that her fav food is mixed veg!
Yes to the breast pump! I had to explain what it was to a bouncer when I was on hen do last year. Not sure who was more embarrassed!

Lol waving is leaving! Grace being fussy so typing is hard lol

Great to see a bit more traffic on here today! I'd hate to see this thread fizzle out, after we've been on such a crazy journey together - so many ups and downs - and supported each other so much. I can't wait to meet some of you in November.

Bluebs - glad you had a nice time with your artwork. It's important to do things we enjoy when we get a chance - makes us feel more like real people, rather than mere milk machines. I'm very excited for you about your psychological thriller! I hope you'll publish it under the name of "Bluebell"...?
Pleased for you about Ru allowing himself to be put down. In the last few days, Jasper has also allowed this for the first time ever, a couple of times. I was starting to worry that he would need to be cuddled and rocked to sleep every night until he's 18...
Hope you have (had?) a nice day with your friend.
Let me know when (if?!) you manage to set up a fb account and I'll add you to the group.
Re expressing, do you express on one side whilst simultaneously feeding Ru on the other? I need to start doing this, as I need to build up my bottle supply. Can you (or anyone else) recommend good positions for holding the baby? I tried to do it today with Jasper lying on a pillow in my lap, but the pillow kept getting in the way of the expresser. Also, I can only express one measly drip every 5 seconds, which is pretty demoralising, so I need to start expressing every day to build up my supply.

Cheery - fb has got a lot more active in the last few weeks, but it tends to be a bit Q&A-ish - I don't really feel you get to know people in the same way although you can stalk their photos.

Becks - do you limit your water intake? Well done on weight loss.
Sorry to hear about DD. It's bound to be just a phase.
Great coma pic. This should be our next theme, now that the "now&then" photos are drying up. I'll try and take one tomorrow 😄

Anna - I'm sorry you're finding it hard to grieve properly. Can't believe it's been two months already. You've been so strong this whole time.
I leave jasper with my parents or DH frequently. He seems perfectly fine with that. Means I'm able to get hair done, muff waxed etc. Planning to go for a run next week while my mum takes him to an art exhibition (culcha dahhling - start 'em young!). I'm really looking forward to it, as I've entirely failed to do any exercise yet (apart from speed-walking). Also going to my first baby yoga class this Friday.
Yup, I frequently eat or use the loo with a baby attached to me. Showering is my only solo activity. I'm keen to change this situation! Jasper is now happy in the bouncy chair for longer, which might help.
Please can you talk us through the situation that required you to explain breast pumps to a bouncer? I can't even...

Oh Sock, I'm so sorry about your friend's DH - that's tragic. So young!
Cute photo - love the outfit 😊
Re leaving baby with daddy for 3 hours, I think the sooner the better - otherwise he might build it up in his mind as something difficult/scary. Better to take the plunge asap and rip that bandaid off (yuck, that mixed metaphor is not very hygienic!). I chuckled just now when DH was sitting on the sofa holding jasper and needed to get up, and he asked me to hold jasper because "how can I get up if I'm holding him?" Seriously?! The same way I do everything, all day every day, whilst holding him... To be fair, he's making a huge effort and is learning very quickly - it just doesn't come naturally. (Mind you, not sure it comes naturally to anyone, it's just that I've been practicing for the last 10 weeks!) Anyway, I reckon the sooner the better.

Went to baby cinema yesterday. Despite all the noise, it's really relaxing being able to watch a film without having to worry about whether your baby will start screaming. Plus the cake (included in ticket price) is delicious. I'll definitely go again.

Question: At what age can you no longer DTD in front of a baby? It feels really weird, but equally we can't exactly just stick him out in the hallway...

9w & 6 days

Julf I don't limit my water I aim between 2-3 litres a day. I find it fills me up and I snack less. I've put all my stats into the fit bit app. I track my calories and I aim to eat 750 calories less than I burn and that should equate to 1.5lb off a week. It's quite good and you can compete with friends for the most steps in a day/week. It gets quite competitive!

Yaaay you've all returned! (Ina spectacular fashion I might add). Clearly you all have more of a life than me... I spend my 92% of my life on mumsnet at the mo lol

julf am so pleased your dh seems to have got over the baby hurdle! Lol at 'will you hold the baby'. Can you send the brill dad vibes to me please.- after a great start my dh has turned into a lazy bloody sod. He's done ONE bath since she was born and is so bloody selfish with his time, wish I had parents close by so I could bugger off for a while and get some help.
Is there anything in particular you're looking for at babyfest? Still not totally sure what it is!

cookies still waiting Impatiently for Cookie goodness with the power of milk making magic!
Can't believe your going back to work, I go into serious meltdowns when I think about returning!

ruby me and DH have a fancy dress themed wedding on Halloween with Annie. We're going to go as funnybones (big skeleton, mum skeleton, baby skeleton and a teddy dog skeleton)

flossie wow those photos! She's obviously bigger but facially she's barely changed! I think babies with lots of lovely hair look so mugh more like people rather than scrunched up little old people a la Annie

rolly am popping to Aldo today to get some of the baby storage bags - about time I got some toys for little one!

bluebell eeeeeek I only read crime novels (and Harry Potter) can't wait for it to be published! Is it uk based? I have so many questions haha

anna oh your girls are gorgeous! Is grace getting more settled in the day? You've done so well managing everything on top of losing your mum, if you ever need to vent here then go ahead!

sunday so do I. Wish there was a Notts based meet up or similar but I don't think there's enough interest!

becks I've heard so many people rave obout their buggy boards!

sock how heartbreaking. I hope you and your friend are doing ok - I agree I think lots of lovely meals taken round and offers of housework etc, I love the photo idea. But like bluebell said we don't know your friend so we don't know how she'd react to this stuff, do what feels right and natural for you. I'm sure all she cares about is being shown that you care in whatever way.

Re facebook it's no replacement for this for me. I love catching up with you guys properly and chatting away. I'll deffo be staying here as long as you lot are too!

Re DTD at the moment I'm so fucked off with my lazy selfish dp sex is totally off the menu but I dunno 6 months?

So Annie gave me a fantastic nights sleep (even if dp didn't with his FUCKING ALARMS) I woke up this morning with a huge wet circle round the boob I hadn't fed off! Whoops! It's never been so rock hard

Off to buy a playmat off gumtree now Annie has definitely started being interested in toys now. Hoping it will distract her enough for me to have a FULL and HOT cup of tea before being required again!

Ah bluebell snap on the bullet journal although mine hasn't got very far as raff keeps having other ideas.. I did make my Dh one for helping to plan the novel he is writing. Huge respect for you!

Expressing and storing advice please we had to throw away 2Oz last night which made me really grumpy. We have only just started this so I know it will be trial and error but Raff is eating between 6.5 and 8Oz when he's being fed and then trying to top up on the breast but I am not sure if it's more comfort. He hates waiting for feeds so I am not sure if to store it in 2 feeds to reduce wastage or one larger feed? Any advice welcomed here.
I need to make sure I leave Dh with enough milk the weekend after next for the three/four hours in the evening.