Newborns - Things they don't tell you!

[Bethbe]

Thought I'd list some of the things that I have been completely unprepared for, - for others to add to if they wish.......may help those going through their early weeks.

Newborns:

They don't just throw up in their moses baskets, - but rub their heads in it too!

You'll sleep in a bed with milk, sick and wee stains!

Lack of sleep is made worse by your constant checking if they are still breathing!

You'll brush your teeth whilst sitting on the loo at least once!

Even if you dress your LO in complete blue or pink outfits, people will still ask you whether it is a girl or a boy!

Every sofa, table and bedside cabinet in your house will be home to a muslin!

HVs will be useless (okay - I was warned about that one)!

Very big men will get emotional at the sight of your LO and you'll get followed around Tescos by old women.

Your strong views on dummies, formula, BF etc will disappear out of sight!

You'll forget to say 'hello' to your DP/DH when they return from work.

That it is common to PUT ON weight when breast-feeding!!!

That everytime your baby wimpers farts or has stomach pain it is because of YOUR breastmilk!

that baby boys pee everywhere when you take their nappies off - i have had pee in my eyes, face, everywhere
that sleeping like a baby menas listening to a cacophony of snorts, trumps, sighs, wriggles and goodness knows what else
that swaddling rocks
that a 2 day old baby can sense when you have just perched your bum on the sofa to finally eat the sandwich you made 2 hours ago and will emit a piercing cry which is impossible to ignore

that in spite of everything, every sleepless night, bout of mastitis and revolting poo they are beautiful beyond compare ....

v good thread!

'Your baby needs to feed about every 2 hours' - took me a while to 'internalise' that this really did mean during the night as well ... and that if you're bf there is no 'feeding fairy' that does the night shift for you!

Oh and the mad dash by your relatives to take part in the sport of 'competitive winding' as a certain cure for crying

That at some point they'll be one freak night when your LO sleeps for a good 5/6 hours over night and you'll then spend forever trying to figure out what caused it in order to get a repeat performance!

That babies cry!! sometimes for no apparent reason and it doesn't mean you are doing anything wrong

That your midwife will want to check your stitches at some point when you are back home and you will think nothing of flashing your bits at her whilst lying on the sofa (or was that just me...?!)