August 2015 - Let the Sleepless Nights Commence

[nolongerwaitingfornumber2]

My DC2 was born on 5th August and I'm up in the wee hours feeding away. Anyone else with their August babies care to join me?

I still can't believe he's here and in my arms!

Went out for an hour at 3 after the whole day in. I just can't do whole days with no events etc I get so overwhelmed with it all. DS was doing his I'm hungry no I'm not hungry thing as well which doesn't help. Just managed to do online shopping and make a stew. Just going to the park makes such a difference!!

In other news, no litre bottles.of cow and gate again in sainsbury arggh!

Frolic- another hoover baby!!! Mine also sleeps to that sound- most of he time anyway! If not it certainly settles him if he's having a grump! Download an app you can play it on that way you still don't have to do housework like me! Think mine is 'sleepy sounds' and has lullabies and other stuff too- I'd hoped he'd like the 'rain on the window' sound as I would have liked sleeping to that too but no he likes the sodding hoover!!

Kbro- never heard of the post natal course sounds interesting! I have to admit I like having places to be at set times each week- I'm still searching for groups etc for a Monday or Friday as i have nothing on those days! Lol

Effin- I need to do nap training- is it working? DS has had a whole one 45 minute nap all day today- except now too I've just been to lidl and he fell asleep on the way home so I've left him in car seat- totally against the rules I know but lidl is literally round the corner is have walked if I didn't have so many heavy things ro but so I figured it's only like him being in it in the car for an hour! If one doesn't get more sleep now he'll be an utter rat bag later- I'm going to yoga 7-8pm so DH is flying solo in the witching hour anyway....hmmmm maybe I should wake him after last night! Lol no I wouldn't! He has apologised at least 4 times and I had a 2 hour nap earlier whilst he watched DS although I suspect partly because he doesn't want me in a mood later as he thinks he's getting lucky!! Caught me in the bath this morning shaving- it's become such a rarity he thinks it only happens now for that!! oh the glamour of motherhood!!! Lol

How was the film Siani? The baby showing? And the actual film? I fancy both!

Frolic- I have to admit things did seem to improve with DS after 6 weeks although it coincided with stopping bf for me so that might be why!

Magrat- I totally agree I have to get out every day too otherwise I get into the worst moods ever and sit in the house overthinking things! I'm sure I should probably face some stuff head on rather than keeping it at the back of my mind by being so busy but it's worke for me for the last decade so why not add a few more issues in there and keep running! Haha!

Went to baby massage this morning- such a lovely group and DS loves it although got a bit grumpy at the end as he was tired! Didn't stop him refusing a nap though!

Oh sending and and lots and lots of to everyone who has had bad nights. DS is 9 weeks now and def seems a bit better at night. We usually get a stretch until 4ish and sometimes later but then have the grunting after that feed too. I think I would have handed the baby to DH and gone into the spare room for a good cry if I'd had what you did last night Mzzzf. You poor thing.

My hormones are definitely messed up. I went to the bank to open a savings account for DS today but was 7 mins late as had to drop toddler at nursery and then DS was screaming for a feed and when I got to town there was no lift from the car park so needed to walk the long way round. Finally made it and the woman nearly wouldn't see me as we didn't have enough time!! I was 7 minutes late ffs for an hour appt! She said "well it is very important to be on time for these things" and I just lost it. I got really angry and then started crying and saying I was amazed I had got anywhere by 10.07 frankly and I didn't appreciate being told off like a naughty child for being late when I was coming to give them business and that it might be important to be on time but it's more important that my baby was fed. I don't think they knew what to do with themselves! Needless to say the appointment went ahead after my outburst and I got an apology.

Frolic and Lily mine lives the hoover, hand dryer, hairdryer and the white noise app on my phone too. In fact the noisier the better!

Kbro, no post natal course here either. Sounds quite a nice way to meet other mums though.

Siani, I loved baby screenings with DD too. It is so relaxing. Hope you had a nice time.

Magrat we get the hungry/not hungry thing too. It's so confusing!!

Lily, glad you enjoyed baby massage. We do one after the bath and DD helps with the oil except last night she poured it on the floor so that wasn't as relaxing as it was meant to be!

We've got steak for dinner tonight...yum! I am soon hungry all the time at the moment.

Fingers crossed for better sleep all round!

Oh my god is this why DS never sleeps? Is it because I never Hoover???? It dry my hair??? That will teach me to be a slummy mummy.

Nolonger we are at my in laws and my hormones are all over the shop. If I get to Saturday morning without screaming at my FIL it will be a miracle. That bank sounds awful. Apology is the least they could do. God I used to be 7 minutes late in my carefree child free days so you did amazingly well.

Magrat we've had an evening of hungry / not hungry. So confusing. Do you think it's comfort sucking? DS also has terrible wind tonight so don't know if it's linked to tummy pains.

DH has now taken him downstairs so I can catch on sleep. By which I mean mumsnet. By which I really mean avoid his bloody father.

Massive fingers crossed for good nights sleep. DH has promised me he is going to do night time nappy changes tonight since he is on leave. I may be on here raging in a few hours.

Film and baby showing were both brilliant! May be a candidate for new favourite film - space film all about bodging stuff with a disco soundtrack - YES PLEASE. lots of people pacing with slings, people changing nappies in the aisles, all super chilled and friendly. Recommend it!

Nolonger- the bank sound like idiots! Well done you for telling them what for I hope they felt bad! I'm with you on the messes up hormones- I have just cried through my first yoga class since doing pregnancy yoga!! Wtf!!?!?!! I thought I was all settled back to normal hormone wise and haven't cried in weeks but got there all excited and teacher (who is THE lovliest lady ever) asked me if I was ok, how I've been getting on and how baby was and I could feel myself welling up! Thought nothing of it but then we started the actual yoga and literally all the way through I had tears flowing down my cheeks!! Can't put my finger on why, I think it felt weird to be there without bump and able to get into poses I couldn't pregnant and also when breathing deeply I was very aware that my belly could fill up with air so much without bump! Plus i haven't done that deep yogic breathing since labour so probably brought emotions from that flooding back! It was a weird nostalgic, end of an era feeling- probably just how much has changed!

Kbro- I hope your DH fulfills his promises unlike mine!! I will see what tonight brings with him as I told him today not to apologise unless he meant it- I.e. was going to do something about it as otherwise it was just a word! He's currently upstairs trying to put DS to bed after he's had him whilst ive been at yoga so he is doing better already!

Oh Siani- you've sold me on the cinema! And the film! Sounds fantastic! I'm going to go next week i think!

Good luck to us all tonight hopefully we'll have better sleep!

Oh I just remembered what I meant to also say (and huge apologies to those that have no interest in this but) I was delighted by bake off result (won't name in case anyone not caught up yet) but person X was my fave!!!

Thanks for the kind thoughts and words ladies. I can confirm it was truly horrendous. Topped off today by going to visit some of DH's family and resulting in a very over tired and cranky DD this evening who has taken FOREVER to settle and so is making me dread tonight now Is it going to be another shit sleep disco?!
Also what is it with relatives asking if we've got dd into a routine yet?! Anyone else get that, followed by the tilted head and "well you're making a rod for yourself" when you say no... Maybe j should be more
Militant with naps and feeds etc. so far I've been very baby led on everything, letting Mother Nature do her thing. Hmmm maybe I need to change?!

Siani - I really want to try baby cinema! And from what you've said it sounds awesome so i might brave it next week!!

Nolonger - well done you for ONLY being 7mins late. I'm normally a super punctual person but since dd you're lucky if I even make the right day!!!

Kbro - what's so bad about FIL? Hope you've gotten some good time out anyway. And yes yes to GBBO result. I 'may' have welled up when Mary did!

I wonder if mini mzzzf having her jabs so late (9 weeks) made a difference to her reaction to them?! I thought the after effects were only meant to last 24hrs, if at all. I just can't work out why she's so clingy, fussy and out of sorts at the moment. She was doing so well with sleeping in her own, I really can't go back to her sleeping on me all the time...

Praying and doing magic rain/sleep dances to help tonight!!!

Oh God! Ds is trying very hard to prove that sleep does not lead to more sleep. I didn't want to say this morning, but he slept like an angel last night. And he's had loads of good naps today. But now he's been awake since 7:30, is shattered, grumpy and wailing but will just not give in. The white noise app and a dummy settles him, but he won't shut his bloody eyes. Arrrrgghhh!

And he's off again ........

I also loved the GBBO final Kbro, thought the winner did ace and was so sweet at the very end. Gonna miss bake off but maybe not seeing all those yummy bakes will help me cut down on pastries, cake, etc

Sending sleepy vibes your way Frolic, the lack of consistency is so bloody confusing isn't it. You get one good night then the next night nothing has changed but they're up all night. They just love to keep us on our toes.

I was wondering if jabs had left DS out of sorts MzzF, after last night's shocker he's been extremely cranky today. Am actually hoping it is the jabs and not a new phase (although I am up for the first night feed already and he only went down at 22:30 so it's not looking good for tonight...)

Nolonger I'm glad you told the bank what's what - 7 mins is nothing and they were being arseholes.

Cinema sounds ace Siani, I definitely want to give it a go, and I also need to leave the house each day as I end up climbing the walls. Baby massage in the morning which is normally really fun but if DS is still grumpy it could be something of a challenge!

Jealous of your yoga despite the tears Lily, I've not done any since pregnancy and really miss it. Glad your DH was on the case when you got home as well.

Not sure about a routine MzzzF, I swing between loving and hating the idea... I reckon just do what works for you and nod and smile at bloody irritating well meaning questions from relatives.

Has anyone else noticed their hair falling out? I stopped shedding hairs in pregnancy but the last few days I keep finding them everywhere, is going bald another oh-so attractive post-baby treat?!

Yes, hair loss is a pp thing. Some people go really quite bald. My friend did. It grows back eventually though. Another joy no bugger tells you about. Not everyone gets it though. I never did.

Mzzf - tell them to fuck off to the far side of fuck sake. The "rod for your own back " shit winds me up so much. You will find your natural routine eventually or if you want to follow the baby whisperer or Gina F or 90 minutes then you will but only if and when you're ready. The rod stuff is so much crap. There is nothing that can't be undone. Bad habits is a load of bollocks. Do what works for you until it doesn't then do something else. I had someone lay this crap on me this week and I was so furious! My wee one is 5 weeks old! Rod for my own back indeed! See folk who've never had a baby who won't sleep? They just don't get it. They assume it's you who is to blame and that you're creating it. You're not. It's the baby not you. You're just coping as best you can. Keep on keeping on and do whatever works for you. The baby will sleep eventually. Argh! People are the worst! Raging on your behalf!

Also delighted with bake off winner. Made a fig, orange flower water and pine nut cake today (Thursday) and dd1 and I made chocolate fairy cakes on Tuesday. Getting our bake on!

Baby screening sounds great. Nothing like that here sadly. Really want to see the new Macbeth. And Bond when it comes out. Is it out already? No idea. Cinema is a dim and distant memory. It's been years since I've been.

My memory of the sleep regression with a non sleeper was not that she stopped sleeping but more that she fed and fed and fed. Mind you she never did a single damn thing that Wonder Weeks app said she would so perhaps it's different for everyone.

at the bank. Well done for standing up to them. You're a fricking hero. I would have been a soggy mess!

Went to hospital for the hearing test. Failed it. She's been referred to Aberdeen - 70 miles away. I'm certain she can hear fine. She's had a cold since day two so I reckon it's just congestion in her tubes throwing the machine off. Fingers crossed anyway. Hopefully the trip to the big city won't be too much hassle and we'll be able to combine it with something fun.

Off to pick up mil later. She's been traveling in France with her puppet show so this is her first time seeing dd2. She's going to be so excited! She is no use whatsoever in the house but she's enormous fun and great with kids so we're looking forward to her visit.

Happy Friday everyone!

Ha, nolonger they should have known better than to mess with hormonal recently pregnant woman! And too right they should apologise!

magrat definitely need to leave the house at least once a day. It can be lonely with a baby all day. If I don't have anything planned I tend to pace round the park nodding at other mums doing the same or at least buy a couple of groceries so I've spoken to someone other than ds!

Glad you liked baby massage lily. We're starting a class on Monday.

Hope you're recovering from shitty nights clstow and mzzzf. I do certainly hope things get better before they regress! I was chatting to a friend today with a nearly 3 year old and she was telling me the different challenges they'd had at different stages - and her dd is a great sleeper! Just remember both the bad and the good phases all pass in time.

Project nap started well. I put ds down in his crib for a nap just over an hour after being awake and shushed him til he slept he did sleep for about 40 mins. A bit short but still progress I think to sleep anywhere other than the sling or pram. This worked twice! Then I went out for a walk and he had another hour's nap in the pram. But after that he would not sleep, by the time I got him home he was screaming overtired and I could only get another half an hour nap in the sling. Bedtime was a total disaster, worst yet, screaming, inconsolable, and didn't sleep til 10pm! Bit then didn't wake up until 0300 which is unheard of here! So don't know whether he was just exhausted from crying or he's finally going a bit longer than 3 hours between feeds. My main concern is just that he's only getting about 11 or 12 hours in 24 when he should have more like 16. Sorry for epic post, think I'm getting a bit obsessive about sleep!

Argh just lost massive reply!

Wanted to thank you all for your support re. the bank. Just wish I'd not started crying while making my, very valid, points!

Big fan of Bake Off result too and now looking forward to the Apprentice and I'm a Celeb. I think being stuck on the sofa when DD was a baby has turned me into a telly addict.

Mzzzf, I agree with Joskar that you don't make rods for your own back and nothing can't be changed any time. We didn't have a routine with DD until she went into her own room and started doing a consistent bedtime /feeding pattern and now she's probably one of the best sleepers out of the who NCT group I was in. She's also very flexible and will have her daytime nap in the car if needed or miss it and do 14 hours at night instead to make it up. A routine can actually be very tying when they are tiny and you want to get out and about for your own sanity.

Clstow, yep got hair loss here too. It will settle down once your hormones get back to normal though.

Joskar, your mil sounds cool with her puppet show! Shame she's not much help but maybe that's a good thing as I find my mil's "help" rather irritating.

Did anyone read the Brian Blessed story yesterday? If not Google his name and Richmond Park. OMG is all I'll say!

effinIneffable I don't think Fergus sleeps anything like 16h either - and he never seems to go more than 40 minutes when I put him down in the daytime. If we're out and he has a really long sleep in the pram he wakes up absolutely hysterical and is miserable and cluster feeding and reflux screaming and vomiting for the rest of the day, too. :/

Missed your post Effin, that does sound exhausting and stressful. Try not to worry too much though as every day will be different as he figures out he's his own person and not just an extension of you. I found leaving the room with the white noise on worked for getting them to nap in the cot fir a reasonable time. If I shh patted then they weren't properly settled when I stopped so woke up sooner.

Mzzf- I would just ignore the 'rod' comments! If your LO is anything like mine it's impossible to get them in a routine at this age anyway and when he has put himself into one a bit I find it lasts a week at the most and then he changes it again!! I've had people asking what time his 'bedtime' is since he was first born- are people really that stupid!? Newborns don't sleep at night never mind have a specific time for doing so!!

Frolic- my DS often does that in the evening- I'll manage to get him to bed asleep then by the time I'm downstairs he's wide awake either looking round or having a dance around- at first I was going into him to try to get him asleep but now I figure as long as he seems content enough and happy I let him be and he often falls asleep (eventually!!).

Clstow- yes to hair falling out! Although I was aware this would happen- apparently it doesn't at all during pregnancy which is why you get thick hair but then after has to make up for the 9 months it missed! I usually she's hair quite a lot anyway so at the minute it is ridiculous! It's everywhere- I've even found it in DS's mouth poor thing! That said it needs to come out my hair went like a lions mane in pregnancy only thicker!!!

Joskar- sorry about the hearing test, fingers crossed your intuition is right, I'm sure it will be!

Effin- Luca never gets 16 hours sleep either I really wouldn't worry! You are aware of Lo's sleep needs and are trying so there is nothing more you can do.

DS had a really good night once he finally went to sleep at 10:45pm!! Slept till 3am with a few murmuring episodes where I popped dummy back in and he went back to sleep. Then fed again at 6.30 and made his hodgepig noises till I gave up trying to sleep at 0715! So whilst I'm impressed with him sleeping so well I'm still knackered from the get ups to settle him! I'm not complaining though he's heading in the right direction again at least!

Weigh in day on Fridays- I've been so well and then this week have put 2 sodding pounds back on! I knew it wouldn't be good as I've pigged out on days out whilst DH has been off this week but didn't think it would be so bad! Now I don't know whether to give up till Monday and call this a week off as if I've been on holiday or carry on!

I'm soooo tired!!! I want to be asleep like Nathan is! (I feel safe posting that as you lot probably look as knackered)

lily I would call it off and start again Monday, but I've not been very good with dieting. I keep meaning to but I'm too tired to think.

Good morning! He finally fell asleep at 2am and has slept reasonably well since. I've never seen him fight sleep like that before. Sometimes he looked like he was literary fighting it - little arms and legs flailing around. He was so upset by the end, whimpering and whinging. And he had massive bags under his eyes. God knows what it was - I'm thinking maybe my antibiotics are knocking him off form.

I also need to leave the house at least once a day magrat, even if it's just to a shop. Yesterday's expedition was to buy gin for sloe gin. The cashier made a joke about mothers ruin .

Thanks for the app tip lily - much better than doing the housework!

Well done for telling them what was what at the bank nolonger. I hate it when people who you are giving business to treat you like they're doing you the favour. Bloody rude!
I saw that Brian blessed story yesterday as well .

I hope you're surviving at the in law's Kbro.

Glad the film was good siani. I'd love a baby screening but they don't do them here.

Yoga can be very good at releasing pent up emotion lily. It probably did you the world of good to get all that out.

Solidarity on the over tired baby front mzzf. I hope you had a good night. I also think you should ignore the 'rod for your own back' advice. You can't make a baby do anything. She's a little human just finding her way in the outside world. It just takes time.

My hair was lovely during pregnancy clstow! Now it's limp, greasy and falling out all over the place.

I hope you enjoy with mil jockstar. I'm sure the hearing best will be fine. Congestion can have a big affect on tests.

Glad project nap went well effin. It's very easy to get obsessed with counting feeds, sleep etc. I try to use ds' mood as more of a guide than anything else. If he's happy, I'm happy.

You both look beautiful fatty. I hope you get some sleep.

Happy Friday everyone.

Fatty- your right i look just as rough!! And currently have a sleeping baby in just that position after he had screamed for his bottle he took half and gave up! Little monkey! Think your right I may as well give up until Monday! I put it down to being so tired this week- all I want to do is eat naughty when I'm tired!

Frolic- I would guess it's the ABs throwing him off too- 2am poor you you must be goosed! Hope you get a nap today at least!

Clstow I cried like a baby and I never used to be a crier. Bloody hormones.

Mzzzf funnily enough the thing that annoys me about FIL is he is obsessed with whether DS is in a routine. He seems to think he is bloody super nanny. He is v old fashioned and doesn't understand when I explain we are baby led. He is also v sexist and does a running commentary to the tv. And DH is like a mute teenager around him who never jumps in and says anything. But we are off to see my mum and dad tomorrow so will be done soon.

Pleased you got to enjoy some yoga lily and your DH has stepped up. I've heard before of yoga making people cry. I am trying to find a baby yoga class for me and DS to join. Also loving idea of baby cinema.

Sorry to hear about all this post jab grumpiness. We are next week (also at 9 weeks mzzzf) so am bracing myself.

Right can't sit upstairs avoiding people anymore. Best go.

Kbro- I never used to be a crier either! These hormones are a nightmare! I think I've cried more since DS was born than I have in the last decade!! Glad your escaping the ILs soon! And glad to hear other people have cried at yoga I really thought I was cracking up!

I can't actually believe that I'm going to say this but DS has been napping for 1hr and 10 minutes!!! Woo hoo! Probably totally just jinxed it but this is the longest nap he's ever had so even if he woke now id be happy!! Sticking with my never waking a sleeping baby policy though I'm now sat here waiting for him to wake up so we can go out which is getting less likely by the minute as we are having a sofa delivered this afty between 12-4 (love how they always make you sit in! ). Still I am happy he's napping so if it means a day in so be it!

Your cake sounds delicious joskar. I loved GBBO and did shed a tear with Mary !! Delighted with winner although they all seemed nice

When I had DD2 lots of my hair fell out - really thin in some places - it grew back though and didn't happen in any other pregnancies - very strange.

DD settled herself to sleep TWICE yesterday!! In the morning when I get up I leave her lying in my bed (we co-sleep) and she usually lies for a little while whilst I get others ready for school, sort breakfast, packed lunches etc - I rush round doing as much as I can until she starts crying but yesterday, she went back to sleep and I had to actually wake her up so I could do school run. Then in the afternoon I decided to make a lasagne for dinner so popped her in the Moses basket - I was in the middle of cooking when she started to cry - went to wash my hands so I could pick her up - miracle - she was sound asleep. Then to top it off, she slept from 10-3 last night

Probably a one off but it sure has made me feel better! Hope all you ladies get some of this good luck too....

Started to post in the night so missed all the posts overnight.

We're starting project nap again this morning. I've been taking a baby led non routine approach but realised that by the time ds let's me know he's tiredby yawning etc he's actually overtired and difficult to settle so I'm trying to develop a routine based on his patterns and give him a chance to sleep before we get to that stage. He also won't just drop off wherever he is, so I need to planwhen and where to settle him down. I loved all the stories of my mum's hippy generation just chucking babies into a spare room at parties and would love to be like that but ds just gets no sleep like that. It's difficult though because my own lifestyle is pretty much going with the flow and it's making it tricky to go out when and where I want. We're not rigid about following times from a book though, I'm just trying to read his signals and plan routine around that. For my own sanity as well I'd bloody love it if I knew when he would be tired so we could plan activities around that and not risk the overtired meltdown. But the whole 'rod' business is a crock. Especially when so muchof this advice seems to tell you to ignore your baby's communication and your own instincts to love them.

Kbro well done for surviving the outlaws. Mil is coming in a couple of weeks and she's fine but expects conversation the whole time and I find it exhausting. DH also feels the need to treat her like a royal guest, doing big meals and cooked breakfasts and taking her out. Which is lovely but ds and I get rather overlooked in the process.

We had a similar shocker frolic but kind of made up for with a longer than usual sleep after. Ds also does the actually literally fighting sleep thing.

I must admit I'm also glad to hear other people have less than perfect nappers / sleepers and I'm not a particularly crap mum for failing to achieve 16 hours sleep. Solidarity and

Crying in yoga sounds like it was something you needed lily. I think birth, early babyhood and sleep deprivation can leave us getting so tense just holding shit together and relaxing can let all the emotions flow.

So, trying to read baby signals, thought he was tired and put him down for a nap only for him to start crying. Then remembered he'd not fed for over 3 hours . Feed first, then nap!

For those of you breastfeeding, does your dc burp after every feed? I almost never get a burp but not sure if it's because he doesn't need it or cos I'm not doing it right. Could this explain the flailing around when I put him down after night feeds?