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Post-natal clubs

Join our Postnatal Clubs forum to find parenting advice for newborns.

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Original poster

December 2012 : Stop that or your going in your cot.

988 replies

halestone · 16/12/2014 21:02

New thread

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

utopian99 · 10/02/2015 23:25

Oh god beasty, I feel for your dh's colleague and family (plus your dh and dd.) I still remember finding out my longest/best school friend's little sister had died in a car accident when we were 13 (she was almost 12.) It was absolutely awful.

DeladionInch · 11/02/2015 08:03

MrsNutella · 11/02/2015 09:39

Beasty that is awful awful news. My thoughts and sympathies

Hales we're still in a cot here.

Actually, I'm wondering about changing DS's bed. my plan was not to change anything until DD slept through, or at least better. We have the Stokke bed (you can change it through three sizes) and so at the moment DD is sleeping in the tiny little bed (which is almost too small) and DS is in the middle size. If I buy a new mattress and rebuild one bed into the bigger size it then has an open side.... I don't really want two middle size mattresses because I can't see us needing the middle size very long for the both of them....

Original poster

halestone · 11/02/2015 12:45

Nutella i only changed the cot into a bed last week as i had a wrong theory that her bashing against the sides was causing her to wake so much. I am so paranoid that she will hurt herself falling out of it though, that there is a double mattress on the floor next to her bed.

OP posts:

SpottyTeacakes · 11/02/2015 12:53

Ds is still in a cot.

Stacks · 11/02/2015 17:02

DS is still in a cot here too. I like the cute factor idea of a little bed for him, but I think changing him over would be a nightmare. Particularly with this awful separation anxiety still going on. He's such hard work with it. From about dinner time onwards he's asking about night time. Will we leave the door open, will we leave the light on, daddy will go downstairs but will come back, mummy will be in her bed with Ella, daddy will sleep in the bed (in with DS)? Over and over, with tears if we don't confirm all these things quickly enough after he's asked. DH had to spend all evening (7-10pm) in with him last night, he woke and cried hysterically every time DH tried to leave.

Beasty thoughts are with your DH collegue and family. Hope DD handles the news ok.

WLmum · 11/02/2015 21:32

Cot here too. Will probably wait until summer to move to T to a bed. She's happy enough in there and I can't be arsed with a change around.
I've just applied for another job. I'm very happy in mine now but happened to see one that will have more of a future. Feel a bit guilty as I've not been in my current job for long but I very much doubt anything will come of it.

WLmum · 11/02/2015 21:35

Oh stacks that sounds really tough on you all. Fx it's a stage which passes quickly. Could you put his cot in your room for a bit then DH could lay on the bed til ds is asleep and then creep out? Or have you tried the gradual withdrawal method?

Barbeasty · 12/02/2015 08:17

We turned the cot into a bed the day A climbed over the side. He's not as good with a bed as DD was, he's regularly out of it waking DD up or climbing on other furniture.

Good luck WL. It's always worth trying.

Stacks it's a phase, and a hard one. I hope he comes through it soon for you.

DD took the news well. Slightly clingy last night, but just asked me once if I knew she was dead.

Today they are both overexcited about the school disco tonight. I'm exhausted and not looking forward to helping!

SpottyTeacakes · 12/02/2015 08:29

Dd has to dress up as an alien tomorrow and I still have no idea what to put her in. She has to pay £2 plus take in extra to buy cakes

We're off to a toddler group today which is £2 for unlimited drinks and cake. Ds is still waking at 5 every morning

SpottyTeacakes · 12/02/2015 16:01

Dd has a large hemangioma birth mark on her back. It's quite faded now, compared to what it was, and is no longer raised. Today I received a note in her school book from her teacher saying she noticed a large red mark and isn't sure if I'm aware of it or how it got there. Apparently she got another teacher to come and look. I know she has to be wary about this sort of thing but I feel a bit offended too I've always worried that dd will be self conscious of it if it doesn't completely go!

DeladionInch · 12/02/2015 16:14

I'd expect them to know the difference between a bruise and a birthmark

green leggings and tee shirt, hair in lots of little bunches?

SpottyTeacakes · 12/02/2015 16:22

I've remembered ds has a dinosaur costume and the body is all green so we're sorted there thankfully! I'll post on pic on fb see what you think, it's easy for me to say as it's always been there.

ddas · 12/02/2015 20:37

If they were worried I'd think more appropriate and safe from child's point of you to talk personally first to you and then decide if concern. Just writing it in book ummmmmm is all I'm going to say!!!!

SpottyTeacakes · 12/02/2015 20:45

I suppose it's because dd gets the bus so they never see me. The note was friendly enough I just feel a bit about it.

WLmum · 12/02/2015 23:23

Honestly, no disrespect intended but it's often the TAs who pick this stuff up and who write in their books but actually have little training. I would write a nice note back thanking them for their concern but confirming that it's a birth mark.
I totally understand that you don't want it to be an issue for dd but could you turn it into a diversity/positive about who you are conversation? I have quite a prominent lump on my face that my dds like to plAy with! Instead of being embarrassed about it we refer to it as my magic button and it can turn them into animals or command cuddles or silence etc. it's all fun for them and I say it's just a part of my face-who I am/ what makes me special.

SpottyTeacakes · 13/02/2015 05:24

It was her teacher. I don't mind really it's just obviously a birth mark! It also comes at a time where I've been having concerns over a little boy in dds class so I got a bit freaked.

ddas · 13/02/2015 06:41

They all have compulsory child safeguarding training- and if true concern appropriate to call the parents on the day to see if safe to be sending this child back home rather than for something else to happen but be hidden. They must have not really had a concern to put it in the book.

SpottyTeacakes · 13/02/2015 07:00

Yes you're right, maybe they were worried it had happened whilst she was there and they hadn't noticed

Original poster

halestone · 13/02/2015 10:13

I think its a good thing it has happened Spotty as at least you know they are looking out for your Dds best interests. Its nice that they have had a concern and raised it with you. You know its perfectly innocent and can explain it or like you said they may have been concerned it happened in school. I know your upset with the letter which is understandable as you weren't expecting it.

OP posts:

Stacks · 13/02/2015 18:30

I'm simultaneously terrified of someone thinking an innocent bruise on my child is something concerning, and getting social services involved. At the same time I find it so heartbreaking and scary that children can be abused and no one notice.

SpottyTeacakes · 13/02/2015 18:33

Dds teacher apologised so now I feel bad for making her feel bad all I said was 'thanks, it's a birth mark it should disappear in the next few years'.

I can't cope with ds waking up so early I'm having to go to bed at 8 most nights.

WLmum · 13/02/2015 18:56

spotty some time ago there was a link to a how to tackle early wakings that seemed to make a lot of sense. Could you try reducing his day time nap?
I've been horribly hungover today so think it might be the chippy for tea - cheers hales!

SpottyTeacakes · 13/02/2015 19:00

Oh no WL! I can't handle hangovers... Time and length of naps makes no difference and nor does going to bed later

Waiting for dh to take dd to bed so I can eat my chocolate.

WLmum · 13/02/2015 20:24

Nor can I spotty! I really must learn to leave quickly after one drink. Any more and I'm in for the long haul.
No suggestions then but you have my unbound sympathies. 5am is harsh.

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