The posifrikentivity graduates thread - we did it!!

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Finally enough graduates (with more very imminently expected) to have our very own little thread. Yay. :)

Janie, me and DH also fell out the other night. I think it is the sleep deprivation that does it! He told me he was annoyed at me for not getting enough sleep. When the only reason I don't is so that he can not go to work shattered. Men!!
Does sound like your DH was having an unreasonable moment. Could you go out for a while and leave him on his own with Leo? I did that, and DH has a whole new respect for my day now. He thinks looking after her is waaaay harder than work, and has made loads of effort since then. Not sure if it would help, just trying to think of ways to get the message accross without 'telling' as it is the tellig bit that usually causes the arguments!
Although I guess with him on the boob you can't really leave for that long can you, sorry wasn't thinking! :(

Bump - you are v clever. Took mini pink to gp today- thrush. Not nappy rash. Poor sausage. New cream will hopefully clear it up.

I am now wondering though if I have thrush in nipples? And maybe we had this since the start which is why we had all the problems feeding? Expressing still hurts, and I'm not even on full power. Then my nips sting for a while after, and whenever they get cold. I thought it was just friction from the pump! I asked gp, he completely disregarded it, but was also trying to hurry me out... Anyone have any knowledge of nipple thrush? (There's a question I never thought I would ask!)

Diet - you okay? You've been quiet Hun?

And shell - how are things? Hope all is a bit better today.

Awe so it's not just me that misses PG and all it's amazingness (even after MC).

These men folk can be sooo annoying! I think it's mainly because their noses get pushed out a bit by baby and they feel all left out. It does get better honest, new babies require a lot of changes and adjustments that you could never have dreamt of!

I have a spotty faced boy. Boo. He had such beautiful skin when he was born and for the first 10 days or so but it appears he's hit puberty already....I want my beautiful fresh faced baby back please!

Soz pink not had nip thrush....

Aw pink how is mini pink doing with the thrush? Can't believe your doctor was shooing you out the door?! Bloody hell. I've recently found that some pharmacists are way better than doctors at giving advice and they aren't in as much of a rush. Might be worth asking in a big boots perhaps?

Garden, my guy has gone a bit blotchy too. He was all swarthy when he was born but I know what you mean about the spots. They do seem to disappear quite quickly though but then new ones come! I was thinking it's maybe due to being into the house with the central heating on maybe?

Leo has got really swollen nipples :( have any of your babies got/had this? The hv yesterday said I've to keep an eye on it as it could develop into mastitis :( little guy.

An yes I agree, the men folk really don't know the half of it. Leo and I had a nice wee day today on our own, we went back to bed after the morning feed and I caught up on lost sleep which was amazing! Managed to get a shower while Leo was still asleep phew! Then had a good sofa day watching a weeks worth of neighbours on catch up, and had my mum round for tea, cake and cuddles! Might even venture to the shops tomorrow for some last minute pressies. I'm going to buy one of those trays with the cushion attached to the bottom so I can have my cup of tea in easy reach on the sofa/ in bed.

What I have mastered is a little pouch bag filled with my essentials that I need within easy reach at all times. Lip balm, nipple cream, glasses, a pen, mints, infacol, etc etc. was quite proud of that one.

Hope chocolate makes it over her soon. I haven't managed to catch up with the old thread in about a week. Must have a nosey overnight if I'm up, although I'm secretly hoping Leo will do his delightful midnight-5.30 sleep (come on little guy, you can do it).

Any baby whisperer out there.... Towards the end of a feed on boob one, Leo sometimes seems to get very flustered and starts to shake his head while on the boob and wriggles his arms and legs. I'm not sure if it's something to do with the milk flow or the latch or what...does it sound normal?

Pink I came across this and thought of you... Can't link it but if you get a moment look up amazon for: Simple wishes hands free double pumping bustier
The pictures are cracking me up!! Especially the one of the model at her office desk!

I had visit from health visitor today, she completely agreed with me about the nips! So this could gave been our problem all along!! How annoying. Anyway, will be nice if it doesn't have to hurt any more.

Mini pink had swollen nips. They have gone down now, but definitely had them for the first couple weeks. Midwife said was due to pregnancy hormones?

Sounds like a lovely day you had.im feeling very not Christmassy. Need to try and get some Christmas spirit from somewhere. winter Pimms

And the pics of that pump bra are amazing! I love the desk one - who would do that?!

Ooh! Check out the PG after MC thread

Oooooog more babies!!!! Marvelous!!

Leo has been feeding since 4pm yesterday. 11 hours. Eleven. ELEVEN. What the fuck.

OMG Janie. What exactly is he doing? He must be coming off at some point???

Janie please tell me he has stopped and you are not still sat there. You must have nipples of steel by now! What happens if you take him off and give him a dummy? He can't be that hungry

Hello!! Found you all!

Have had an interesting first night with Josh!

He arrived at midday yesterday after we got to the labour ward at 10.15am. So pretty quick. Vv annoyed with myself as I must have chucked out the cables for my tens machine when getting bag prepared - had new pads but nothing to connect them up with - very nearly cried! So gave birth on gas and air (oh and of course paracetamol

We we're let home after 6hours and FIL &step MIL had put for on, bathed Ds1 and cooked meal - bliss. Josh in Moses basket then goes bright red and starts choking - I'd totally forgot Ds1 did this on first night in hosp too - mucus.
So DP decided Josh should sleep in our bed overnight in case he did it again (and we didn't hear him way over at the end of the bed) which has meant in practise me being awake all night feeding every hour or so. Josh is pretty good at latching on but it's still a nasty surprise for my nips

Will try to catch upon the thread soon - but just wanted to add that if anyone does think they have nipple thrush (feels like they are cut with glass) then a Fluconazole tablet always worked best for me last time, you can pay for them OTC if you can't get to GP, I may get one pack just to cover over Christmas as it was a real issue for me last time.

Now lying with sleepy boy on me - this would be heaven if my uterus would just stop contracting like a bitch

Hey choc, welcome aboard! Congratulations!!! Sound like labour wasn't too horrific for you, fantastic news :)

How has your ds1 settled in with new bub?all going well?

Tell me more about this tablet. Will just cream not work? I guess tablet may work quicker?

Yay chocolate! Delighted for you :) how annoying about your cables! But fair play to you for just going with gas and air!

Leo decided he'd had enough at about 4am. So 12 hours. If he came off the boob he would just screech the most painful cry. I thought it was wind but nothing. Checked his nappy, took hips clothes off in case he was too warm, had some skin to skin, but nothing other than boob would do. He would get all flustered and start shaking his head from side to side and start waving his arms and kegs about as if he was having a bad dream. He'd rip himself off, screech then latch back on again. He'd had infacol.

I'm just feeling so clueless, I don't know what I can do to help my baby boy. Am I missing something really obvious? Could he have been overtired and if so, what's the remedy for that?

I really have to get to the shops this morning, and I want to get out to clear my head. Managed a shower and thought I'd even dry my hair as a treat and my hair dryer just fucking blew up! Aargh!!

He on the boob again now, just hope he fancies a light breakfast today.

Congratulations on you're new arrival Chocolate :)

Had the health visitor here today and Charlotte now weighs 9lb 12. She said she has put on what's expected us more so obviously doing something right. Still struggling with the feeding! She advised I take her to the Drs and ask about thrush. I have it and she had some discharge very sore bottom plus the pain in my nipples.

Can't believe Leo feeds that long Janie! Phew! Did he sleep well after all that feasting?
I need to feel more festive too! Am taking DS to paint a Santa plate at a craft session tomorrow so maybe that will help! Just for to be organised and there for 10.00am!

How frustrating Janie. I would guess he just wants the comfort, or like you say, doesn't know how to get to sleep. Imogen has that problem. Getting her to sleep is different every time- a mix of cuddles, dummy, bum patting, shh-ing and the sleepy sounds app that diet recommended. She always has a bit of a fuss and cry then passes out. Some times take longer than others.

Ooh lucky, thrush all round. I never realised it was so common! You poor thing. Imogen's bum is looking a little better, although still sore. Hoping the cream starts working soon.

We are having a fussy day today. She just won't settle, wants to be held all the time. I don't mind but it makes expressing very hard to do! However, she started smiling this morning. Proper big beaming smiles. All worth it :)

Fluconazole tablet goes through your system and "pushes" the thrush out from inside. Whereas the cream is just topical ie outside in.

I couldn't get shot of my thrush last time with just cream for me and Ds (bubs will get it in their mouths from you and pass it back )

Have a search on mn - it's where I found it advised last time. There is a National Breastfeeding association (?) leaflet which basically advises to use the tablet which I printed out and took to my GP last time (in case I was denied a prescription as was pretty desperate at that point)

Ds1 has been with us all day and it's been ok, a couple of strops and tantrums but he is reasonably interested in his brother (as much as can be expected) ds2 isn't wanting his toys/tv/iPad - so no huge threat I guess.

Hi Choc, lovely to have you with us. Congrats again to family Choc (selection box?!)

Janie, my DS is not that dissimilar. If I remember right infacol takes a few days to totally kick in, how long have you been using it? Even with infacol my DS struggles to bring up wind - not aided by the fact that he guzzles and gulps down the booby juice in the first place. There are times during the day when if i haven't managed to get wind up he will scream until he gets boob. Whilst he's on the boob he doesn't seem to be affected by the pain of trapped wind. Do you think it could be the same for Leo? More vigorous winding required? (I know it doesn't always work...)If you find after a few days Infacol is not doing the trick you could always try Gripe Water instead?

Hope the thrush outburst buggers off soon for everyone concerned. Pink those smiles make it all worthwhile X

Thanks garden, I'll keep an eye on him and see...we've been using the infacol for about 5 days I think. Don't even know if it is colic / wind but pharmacist thought it was worth a try.

I managed to get the bus to the shops but once there I started to get in a state that he might need feeding or changed (I haven't done either away from home). I burst into tears and started panicking so I had to leave and walk to my mums in a complete state. She managed to settle me down and was great. She suggested that I just give him just 20 minutes on each side and then offer a dummy if he's still rooting as there's no way he could feed for as long as he's been doing it. Then maybe I can feed more often but just in smaller doses. Worth a try I guess. Managed to get the bus home again but burst into tears again as soon as I got off the bus, DH then had to deal with me being a complete mess.

I think what's also playing on my mind is that I can't seem to settle him without him being on the boob. Other people can cuddle him and he'll fall asleep, whereas I'm just a big carton of milk to him. We don't have nice cuddles, just feeding. He cuddles everyone but me and I'm questioning whether or not he actually likes me :( I hope he knows I love him, I'm just not showing it very well I think.

Sorry for being such a depresso, I'm just feeling so down right now and I just am at a complete loss. I don't want to resort to formula if I can help it but I really am beginning to get to the end of my sanity with the feeding. I might try to express a bottle or two tomorrow so that dh or my mum could let me sleep.

Oh Janie. Sending you the biggest hug. Are you still having a health visitor seeing you each week? You should talk to someone about how you are feeling in general. Expressing does sound like a good idea and maybe letting someone else do at least one feed so you can rest. Also phone the helpline number. You are not alone even if it feels like it. Would someone like your mum be able to go on a little outing with you. Pick somewhere you know has changing facilities like marks and Spencer's or a garden centre and go have a cuppa and take your mum when he needs changing. I'm not that confident to feed in public bit some places have special rooms or u have a cover to use. Failing that I have sat at a cafe with a friend and faced the wall away from everyone and done a quick feed just to get us home!

Also Charlotte uses boobie as comfort and to fall asleep also. Shushing, patting and rocking doesn't work here either. She is snacking every hour and a half tonight. I need sleep! Shattered.com. I have DS (3) and my 11 year old niece all day 2mor too! I'm hoping that my niece will entertain DS!

Janie try not to beat yourself up, you really are doing an excellent job, hang on in there. I think what your mum is saying is a good idea, he only has a small tummy so there is a limit to what he can actually eat. Far from just being a milk carton your boob provides little Leo with the feeling of safety and security which is why given the option he will stick with mummy's boob. I know you feel like you aren't getting cuddles but for him you are the provider of the best comfort and baby cuddles. You've said before about keeping him on the boob for about 45mins after a feed until he's in a deep sleep, maybe you could try and use he dummy for that bit?Are there any 'experts' at the breast feeding group that can help you? Some of what you are feeling is probably down to sleep deprivation and hormones but I'm sure it would help you to chat about it and see if they can come up with some ideas to try. Expressing and handing the job over would give you a chance to get an extra kip. Just a little thing on expressing though, sometimes they struggle to fathom out bottles when they are used to boob as the sucking action is different. Hopefully it won't be a problem for you but my DS was having none of it when I first tried although she was about 3 months old which may have been why. Try and get someone else to give the bottle as they can still smell your boob and wonder why the hell they can't just have your boob! Also there are loads of different teats out there and it may just be trial and error. I tried loads but ended up using a bottle called 'Breast Flow' (you can buy on amazon uk) which was the only one that worked for us and it took a couple of attempts to get her to take it too.

lucky last night was an every hour and half for me too. I'm working on the fact that this really won't go on forever, the bigger they grow the more they can take in and then the longer they will sleep...tonight he's done a 3 hr sleep so they are possible!

Janie you poor love you are not just a giant milk bottle. You are his favourite thing in the world! Can your DH help settle him after you have done your 20 mins each side? I only say because when he is on you he can smell milk. That's like saying to us, please go to sleep, while i wave this giant Gin and tonic bar of chocolate under your nose. Wouldn't happen would it!!
I do understand what you are saying about giant milk bottle- although I am not booby feeding I am constantly either giving milk or expressing milk. I feel like a giant cow, and it is so undignified I could cry. But.... Bigger picture, it is the most important thing to them and we are showing what good mummies we are by putting in all this time and effort.

That said..... If it is really getting you down, or if you can't get help from DH, put him on one formula feed a night. This should really fill him up, and lose the association with nighttime-boob. It isn't a bad thing if it makes you happier - happy mummy = happy baby.

Also - Agree with luckys suggestion of picking a nice safe place and just getting these things over and done with for the first time. I picked a mummy friendly coffee place and a pub. Was far less scary than I had been picturing in my head!

Oh my goodness garden. I could have written your post! I had exactly the same issue with DS and bottles! I tried at about 3 months to give one as had read before could cause confusion and he would have none of it! I had a wedding to go to so he was meant to stay with my mum! Spent hundreds on different bottles before finding those breast flow ones in TK max for about 50p! Took to those straight away! Il be hunting those bottles down again at some point! Ended up taking DS to that wedding in the end as didn't get it sorted in time!

Janie - Infacol does take time to build up and you need to use it every time. There is also Colief - different kind of drops you could try. It's in most chemists and should be in baby sections of big supermarkets too.

Is there a mothercare or M&S as they should have feeding rooms you could use if really struggling. In our nearest shopping centre there is a non food Asda which has big feeding room that I never knew existe before

Definitely try expressing some milk - to give yourself a break if nothing else. You could even then use it when out if you wanted. It's vv scary getting out but once you do, it does get easier.

All good here - milk coming in so boobs are massive. I expect we'll need the Infacol soon as Joss is swigging like it's free beer. After pains are still a joy.

Not dared to try the scales yet - I was 87.5kgs in the labour room! DH was a bit as pre pg we were both70kg I know it's not important right now (esp as planning Nutella on toast for breakfast)

Ha lucky I had to do it for a wedding too! Came close to telling them to bugger off (strictly no children!). If I remember rightly we didn't find them in time so I just fed her before the ceremony and left her with friends who were only invited to the evening do then went home after the ceremony. Those breast flow bottles are a god send - I didn't know you could get them in tk maxx, will have to keep an eye out, although still got the old ones, can you reuse bottles????