June 2013 (3) - teething & not sleeping!

[rrreow]

I broke the old thread! Step this way, step this way.

We'll be taking a pack with us and then buying while out there. We have been using Waitrose own brand occasionally and both kids were in 5+ but that was mostly due to them not being as absorbent as Pampers so we went bigger. I'm not sure if they got tested with DS2 poo.

I think I will try bigger as it makes sense that bigger would allow for more space to 'collect' the poo rather than it being pushed out the back? But then I guess it also really depends on how he's sitting/lying at the time of doing a poo. I was hoping to have success with Pampers as I think they'll have those in the US, whereas with other brands not sure?? In any case I'll bring along some waterproof wraps and hopefully that will aid containment a bit.

yep, nature babycare = naty. They do us v well. One will last ds overnight (unless dh puts it on wonky). We usually use reuseables by day

We use size 4 Pampers Active Fit and Amy is 98th for height and between 91st and 98th for weight.

But it depends how they carry their weight, I suppose. Amy is slender but solid rather than having rolls of baby fat.

I'm happy to send a sample 4 to you too!

DD is on the 91st percentile and size 4 in Pampers Active Fit fits perfectly and will do for a long while as size 4 covers a wide range - 15-40lb according to the Boots website.

They hold poo really well, but that's the Active Fit, not Baby Dry - we didn't like those as much.

4+ isn't any bigger - it's just more absorbent for night time from what I've read.

And I agree with MrsBri, it must depend on how they carry their weight. DD appears to be of a similar build to Amy - the description of slender but solid without rolls of baby fat fits well.

Another fan of naty here, the only ones that last overnight for us. Pampers were useless and he got nappy rash.

Hm OK so likely that 4 is the right size (although 4+ is good because that way both kids can use the same ones) as Z is sturdy without rolls of fat. Maybe the babydry is just not the right type as they're designed for nighttime (?) so maybe not the best for poo. I shouldn't have left this to the last minute lol. I think I'll buy a pack of active fit and hope for the best. Thanks for all your offers to send though!

Rrreow for info main brands in us are pampers and Huggies plus supermarket own brand. We used to favour huggies for absorbency. Note though that the US nappy numbering system is different so a 3 here is not the same ass a 3 there - read the weight range instead. Have a great holiday, where are you off to?

Ooh see we use Lidl size 4's and have another tall slim baby. Saying that we've even had poosplosions out if our reusables this week which is unheard of. Just goes to show the virulence of the D&V we've had this week.

Who knew a 3 yo could break your heart with one little sentence "you only love the baby" I actually thought I was going to burst into tears probably not helped by the extra hormones but on a serious note this has really bothered me as I thought I was doing a good job splitting myself between them but obviously not :-(

Oh no Madame That must have been heartbreaking to hear.

You're probably doing just fine with your division of attention; it's just that he would have been used to more attention before a baby arrived into his little world and there's no way it could carry on for him in the same way, but he won't fully understand that yet.

Hormones are a bugger and have a lot to answer for.

whoops, she, not he. Sorry!

I think she sees the bf'ing as extra cuddles but again I thought I had dealt with that and always finish off whatever I was doing with her before feeding and even said things like "oh baby needs more milk to get big and strong so she can play with you" etc etc. I'm not sure if I'm overreacting but I'm gutted!!

Ooh Madame, big hugs. I don't have the second child so can't say I know, but I can imagine how hard it is. You will be doing a fantastic job, don't question that. Maybe dd1 just needs a bit of tlc, a boost, we all have our needy times.

Maybe a present from dd2 that she can play/do while you feed, a doll for her to feed and do with? I'm sure some of the other ladies will have far better advice

X

I'm struggling a bit with this too MadameJ (though it hasn't been articulated quite like that!). With DD when DS1 was born, I had a basket of "special" things that were for playing with when I was feeding/changing/etc the baby. That worked pretty well. Also, making sure that every nap time I made time to do something 1 on 1 with DD, including eg Lego that was too small/dangerous to be out when the baby was up. So bigging up that only she could play with it, because she was bigger, and wasn't it good to be bigger because look at all the cool stuff we can do.

DS1 is a different kettle of fish, sadly, and I'm struggling with helping him atm - although today has been particularly tough as I'm knackered, I fell down the stairs last night and have hurt my foot, plus DS2 is teething, grumpy, and seems to be having another growth spurt cos he's grizzled and cried all day long and not slept very well, it seems like.

It's so tough isn't it. I think one of the main issue is dd1 was my complete world, I gave up work when I had her and we have being inseparable ever since and no matter what I do having dd2 obviously impacts this. She has always got so much 1-1,and that hasn't changed, I can't do anymore! My husband thinks I am being silly but hey ho it's how I feel!!

That sounds hard Madame. Don't give yourself a hard time though. I'm sure no matter how much or little time you give dd1 she'll have the capacity to want more. You just have to deal it out the best you can and accept that there will always be sibling jealousy at different stages, but they'll love each other and they'll all know you love them.

Thanks Aloha, that's really useful to know. We're flying to NY and have rented an RV. We'll be visiting DHs family in NJ for a couple of days then driving down to Florida (going to Disney!! YAY!!) for hopefully a couple of weeks of warm weather. We haven't had a 'summer' (i.e. warm weather) holiday for 5 years, so I'm really looking forward to it.

MadameJ, that must've been really heartbreaking to hear. Remember this is about your DD1s feelings, it isn't about what you're doing or not doing. She is not stating an immutable fact, she is telling you about her worries and feelings. Rather than trying to negate it ('that's not true!' or 'but the baby needs a lot of time because she's little') try to let her know you understand and that her feelings are normal ('you are worried mummy doesn't love you as much because she spends time with dd2?' 'you wish mummy could spend more time with you?' etc). I'd really recommend Siblings Without Rivalry. I thought it was a good read with some awesome tips and really practical advice. If you can, spend some super special 1on1 time with DD1. I went out for lunch with DS1 the other day while DH had DS2. We went on the tube, watched the trains, had lunch and went on the bus. Only for about 2.5 hours but it was great just spending time together and I think DS1 really appreciated it (he's nearly 3).

Thanks for all the empathy and advice ladies. I have spoke to dd1 about it a few times and we discussed all the things that I do with her and not dd2. She is starting dancing tomorrow so I have arranged for dh to look after dd2 so we can go alone and have some lunch on the way back so hopefully we will enjoy that!

Sounds perfect Madame. Enjoy!

That sounds lovely, Madame.
Your trip sounds ace, rrrr!

Oscar is spending the afternoon with OHs parents. It is the first time I have been away from him and I don't get on with them. They are planning on having him one day a week when I go back to work in march so I know it has to be done. I cried once they left and feel sick worrying about him. I don't think they are prepared for him, the house is not baby safe at all. I want my baby back.

Oh no Curly that sounds awful! When I had dd1 I briefly went back to work and dsil was looking after dd but I just hated it, she has very different parenting ideas to me and it just didn't work hence becoming a sahm!! How long have they got Oscar for today?

They are playing it by ear, but I will send OH about 3.30 if we have not heard by then. That way I can bf before tea and we can eat together. and I can bath him, they both wear stinky perfume/aftershave

That's really tough curly. You say 'they are planning', is that their decision, or is it mutual? Are there any other childcare options you would feel better about? It's really tough when you have to hand over your baby to people with different ideas.