July 2013 - Part 1. Remember your pelvic floor exercises!

[TotallyEggFlipped]

Time to start the post-natal thread.

And start those PELVIC FLOOR EXERCISES!

Icing - you're not horrible! It's important for her that you have a break to recharge yourself. Babies can be really hard work. I hope you manage to get some rest and some 'me time' while she's with MIL.

Unsettled night here with extra feed (normally 2 a night recently) and DD1 up since 5....

icing it's tough when they cry so much. we've just called for reinforcements too. my sil.stayed over night to hold jo when he gets to the morning grunt stage. just done the handover ceremony....listening to check ok then roll on a little sleep. make the most of your mil and def talk to gp....it's not the dreaded colic is it?

Icing (and others finding it hard) - remember its just a phase and things will get better. Do what you need to in order to get through the tough times.

Vinegar - good luck with flying solo.

SnFED - with you on the knackered front. J up 3 times and ds2 up 3 times too with nightmares - as was holding j to get him to sleep I had to wake dh to deal with ds2. Its been a week of this now - I think its linked to starting school.

Dinky bless DS2. It's such a time for them isn't it? Thankfully DS has had a good two days in school but the early part of this week was hideous. He's normally such a good lad but his behaviour was atrocious. I assume it was anxiety.

I've had to be all military to make sure the school run has been smooth! So far so good and I think I've worked timings out and helpfully L has fed at the right times. I'm scheduling some sofa time next week though. It's killing me being on the go constantly!

Sorry to hear the six week crying peak is taking its toll. Babies are really hard! Take some time for yourselves. I used to find a solo walk round the shops did wonders. So much so, I plan on a bit of that this weekend. DH doesn't know yet!!

Happy weekend everyone.

Is it too late? My last (2nd) baby is now 34 months old!

Bad night here too! Was kind of expecting it as he slept too much yesterday day following 2nd vaccinations the day before but at 3am I made a plan that my mum can take him to see my nan this afternoon while I sleep! Fingers crossed for afternoon naps all round!

Bad night in the Panda house too. JP is still snotty so it's like sleeping next to a warthog. I think he's finding feeding a bit tricky too as he's only taking a little at a time, so was waking every 2h. Soooooo tired.

To cap it all, the Junior Warthog has now given me his cold. Sniff.

Icing - sounds like you are having a tough time. She's not got a temperature has she? That could be making her irritable... or it may well just be a phase for her. Don't feel bad - we all need a break sometimes.

Dinky - your school list reminded me of The Apprentice: rushing all over the city to buy a seemingly random collection of items! Hope all the new school starters (and returners) are getting along ok.

I have a cake mission this week. Mum's 60th next weekend so need to whip up something marvellous. This has so far involved looking at cakes on the internet whilst lying in bed feeding the boy. It's a tough life.

panda you genius. that makes sense. I remember hearing that babies do.most of their breathing through their nose so if it's blocked it would be hard to feed. we've done three feeds this morning since 6'30 and all have been short...but jo has been sneezing heaps and making like a mating warthog too so that explains it! I was beginning to wonder if it was another growth spurt and we'd have a six foot newborn. speaking of growth jo is now 11 pounds and I have to say Esme if youre still reading how DID you do it? amazing

8+1

Currently waiting in the bank to see if they will lend us 10k extra on our mortgage to do up bathroom & consolidate an old loan of mine. Quite why I decided to do this on the weekend DH is away I have no idea!

I have a feeling we might be in for a tough day. N hasn't really napped at all yet a d the tireder she gets, the harder it is for her to sleep. I need to go to the supermarket too. I think I'm going to have to add some treats to the shopping list.

Chocolate stillno and lots of it. It's the only sensible thing to do

M still has her cold (as do I but at least my temp has settled)

Just found out on Thursday that all 4 of my children should have had BCG at birth due to one grandparent being from high risk country. I remember having (various) conversations with hv over the years and being told they didn't need it. Am a bit as I think they'll be more likely to scar plus will be sore and they will remember it etc. Plus will have to take ds1 out of swimming lessons till it heals which could take months. We have paid up till Christmas!

Thinking - one grandparent from a high risk country doesn't sound like a big risk factor on its own. At this point, DS1 could certainly wait until there's a natural break in his swimming lessons. He's waited long enough. They might also need to be tested to see if they definitely need it now they're a bit older. (Daisy prick or equivalent). DD1 had a BCG at 12 months-ish (it's routine in Ireland) and we continued swimming as normal and didn't have any problems.

Thinking J had the bcg when he was less than 24hrs old as the west london "tropics" is a risk area it has left a little mark but didn't seem to hurt him much. he didn't cry (and he cries at everything) I think it's prob a good thing to get over and done with as it is back in the uk...although maybe at the end of swimming if it affects that.

a medic would be better to advise but when I was younger they used to give me this cream called emla cream I think which numbed the area first so you couldn't feel the needle at all. perhaps you can request it for the other 3 if they are scared of needles

I actually requested it before my first antenatal blood test. the nurse raised one eyebrow and said "this is your first child isn't it?" ..."you clearly haven't experienced pain before" and then jabbed the needle in ... so cream is prob intended for 3 year olds and not 30 yr olds

Afternoon all. Am with you on the dreading tonight SNFED - J is 2 months old today and has celebrated by being a sleep and medicine refusnik (out of 4 doses I reckon only 1 has gone in and he has managed a total of 45 minutes sleep through the day), doing 2 poonamis (after 6 days of waiting for it - I reckon there were at least 4 full nappies worth of poo in those poonamis) and multiple voms and scratching himself to ribbons with his talons (which when I cut them I managed to cut into the nail bed on two nails causing even more screaming and distress all round). Today has not been a good day in the dinky household.

Thinking - my sister and I (with family from high risk countries and travelling to and from to India every few years) had our BCG at 13 - and we were fine. All 3 boys have had them at or shortly after birth - and never was told not to take them swimming. To be honest they closed over very quickly for all 3 - DS2's scarred but J and DS1's are fine. If you're not planning any exotic trips and staying put up north, I'd say you're fine.

Good luck with the mortgage man Vinegar.

Hope you and JP and Cheek's J all feel better soon Clenching.

thanks dinky

hopefully jackson will sleep better for you if he's had so little in the day. but sorry to hear about your hard day. must have been like holding a ticking bomb waiting for those nappies! crikey

we're just on our way back from london where my friend says she has had a nighttime routine from 3 weeks..which begins with a bath at 6:30. we don't put jo to bed till 11ish when we sleep but perhaps I need to change that? my fear is that if I put him to sleep at.7pm his day (and mine) will subsequently start at 3am

whats working for other people? early nights or bed at your bedtime?

J goes down some time between 7 and 8.30 - today at 7.30ish as he was so knackered. Our evening routine consists of J screaming lots, cluster feeds, meds, a bath around 40 minutes before going down, short massage, j hollering or feeding while I do toothbrush and stories for his big brothers then up to our bedroom to do swaddle and final feed to put him down. He then goes till sometime between 2 and 4 till needing his next feed - and I get some time in the evening to do chores, have dinner etc.

Sorry in advance for too few personals, but I wanted to pop on to say icing that I have definitely felt the same this week. C is 6wks now & has been very hard work this week. As my first (and last!) child this has been really challenging for me. Thankfully my parents are here this weekend, and I've been able to have a bit of a break which has broken the back of me feeling overwhelmed, crap & guilty. I'm sure it won't be the last of those feelings, but hopefully the break will carry me through the next horror! I hope you have lots of support around you - keep on mn'ing!

At the moment we're encouraging sleep from about seven so we can get some evening to ourselves. Often this does not work v well so considering trying bit more of routine. We don't yet take her up to bed until we go up. Partly because of fearing that she'll sleep deeply then wake up v early wanting to start the day!

cheek we've started a bedtime routine with Juno too. Only in the last couple of weeks but she seems to like it and it means that DH and I can eat together- something we hadn't done for weeks. Like Dinky we have crying and cluster feeding in the early evening. We start the bath between 6.30-7.30 which settles her then a bit of massage then a story then more milk then bed (sometimes milk at the same time as story if she is screaming). I tend to feed until she is very drowsy. But she will now go down slightly awake and self settle. The whole process takes about an hour, sometimes a bit more if I go back in because she is inconsolable and give her cuddles/more milk (which I'm having to so less). The whole process is quite calming which I think she likes and she has begun to self settle a bit.

She will usually go down for a 6/7 hour stint followed by waking every 2hrs. It's still up and down at the moment but I'm hoping if I persevere she might get into a pattern of sleeping better.

I don't have a routine in the day though...

9+4

Icing, I think sometimes it's best to allow yourself a break from babies. They really are hard work. Don't feel bad though, as you'll feel much better, and a happy mum is a happy baby.

Cheek, I pretty much started a bed time routine from day one, mainly because I have one with DD and L just had to fit into that. So we have dinner at 6.00ish. I bath L at 6.30ish, then feed him whilst DD is bathing at 7ish and whilst she gets ready for bed and bedtime stories. She's usually in bed by 7.30 / 7.45 and I sit with her a bit whilst giving L sleepy cuddles, then one more feed for L and he goes in his cot to self settle at about 8.15 / 8.30. He sleeps till about 1 or 2 ish, then till about 4.30 / 5am then wakes up at around 6.30.
This will have to change when I go back to work, but works fine at the moment.

I didn't have a routine at all with DD and often didn't try to put her down until 10 or 11 at night and she was terrible at sleeping. Could just be temperament but pretty sure a routine helps.

Gah just wrote a long message and it got deleted
Routine is bath, bottle, bed with lullabies and self soothing.
Mil looking after baby went horribly- she completely undermines us at every chance - didnt let A sleep apart from one hour long nap, gave her loads of water even though we said not to, only have her 4.5/7 bottles when normally shed have it all, does her nappies up right to the middle so they really dig in to her, so we were left with an upset screaming baby that took forever to settle because she was so hungry and so tired! But mil put it all down to wind he treats me like i have no idea what im doing and just tells me im wrong whenever possibles

Sorry about the long rant just so angry with her!

Icing I'm sorry your mother in law has upset you. I would be upset too! I don't think mothers/MILs realise how upsetting their comments can be...

It sounds like you are doing a great job. I hope you have others in RL who can back you up at home. Sending virtual hugs your way.

Sorry MIL babysitting was such a disaster Icing - hopefully you can find another babysitter who will listen to your requests. I have to admit, blythely ignoring parental wishes is an almost universal grandparent thing. Must be in the grandparent handbook or something.

I ran a maternity and new baby stall at a Baby and childrens market today (J was great and was in sling and bf for first hour then in buggy in park with DH for second hour) - made nearly £200 and still have I reckon another £100 worth of stuff to sell on ebay/local fb selling page. We're off to the southbank this afternoon to take the boy to a play - rather hoping J doesnt descend into his usual screamfest...

Thank you for all your advice.I think it'll be worth trying a routine from tomorrow. Maybe 7:30 bath, feed and bedtime story (whilst being burped) - and hopefully he'll sleep till 11 -then feed him again. I'll let you know how we get on. He's very good at self settling the first time we put him in the moses basket but rubbish after that. Last night I resisted feeding him at 1:30 (he had fed at 11) even though he was crying - it was hard hearing him grizzle but it would be great if he could do 11-3.

Icing i'm sorry it didn't go well with your MIL. I don't think they mean to undermine us i think they just unwittingly do things out of habit. And sometimes i wonder if they think when we do things differently it's somehow us undermining how they raised us. From what i can tell the thinking has changed so much over the year and what worked for them; teaspoon of brandy, jam on the nipples, cough syrup with opium didn't kill us off but can you imagine what the health visitors would say now . It's really frustrating when they do things that you wouldn't do yourself - especially after all the effort we all go to to research what's right and get to know our babies, so i really sympathize - but keep explaining to her what works for A and don't give up on the help yet. I'm experiencing the same thing and it's taking everything i have not to get mad, i really hope things improve for you soon. Sending a virtual hot cup of tea and dunk-worthy biscuits your way! Or a pina colada (take your pick)

Dinky was your night any better? Enjoy the Southbank - hope the weather doesn't spoil it

Sorry long message - i'm on my laptop and i'm verbose at the best of time

Hi all, ds2 is 4 today! We've had a lovely day, sunny here so been out in garden all afternoon.
Re BCG dh has a lot of family in the country in question and people come over the visit fairly often. I'm sure we'll go out at some point too as it's a great place for a holiday so I think it is worth them getting it.

On phone so not doing personals other than to say we don't really have a bedtime routine- I feed M on and off during evening till she flakes out, normally 9ish. I then just hold on to her till I go to bed. I quite like having some uninterrupted cuddles with her in the evenings!
She slept till 5am last night -7 hours plus stretch
7+6