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Post-natal clubs

Join our Postnatal Clubs forum to find parenting advice for newborns.

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Original poster

April 2013 - We've all had our babies now. Let the (hard work) fun commence!

953 replies

HadALittleFaithBaby · 23/05/2013 21:35

Thought I'd take the liberty of starting a new thread since the last one filled. So mark your places, get comfy and prepare for a few sleepless nights!

In particular we think of Empress and little Sam - hoping and praying he's coming home! :)

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Trishstar · 27/05/2013 16:03

Sounds like we are all having a few challenges!

Relationship wise we do snap it's hard but it's not forever!

Re: switching to FF, I feel you need to do whatever makes you happy as a miserable mummy is more detrimental to a baby than formula.
I would have loved to have EBF but it just didn't work, H was stressing out and so was I, he's so happy on mix feeding. Maybe you could do the same? Still express a bit to give your milk and use formula too?

Nic I messaged you back on fb! I was somewhere without signal earlier xx

lurcherlover · 27/05/2013 16:10

Hi ladies, can I join the club? Dd is almost 7 weeks old, born on 11th April. I also have DS who's 2.7 so life is rarely quiet

Trishstar · 27/05/2013 16:24

Welcome LL!

We also have a Facebook group too, link at the start of the thread.

wishfulthinking1 · 27/05/2013 16:24

Welcome lurcher!

Well, I'm still a sweaty feverish mess- I've been in bed all morning whilst DH had baby downstairs and bought him up to me to feed every 1 hr 30 think I'm the only one feeding so regularly

tatooed - I've heard that fresh air / light exposure in the daytime can help babies adjust to day / night.

The relationship with DH is hard sometimes- there's an element of competitive tiredness which hacks me off massively as he doesn't get up at night at all! Also DH doesn't have a huge amount of patience- P cries a lot with trapped wind and DH often just gives P back to
me to fees him as he thinks that must be what's wrong- despite me saying he's not hungry. I know DH is trying his best though- no one said this parenting lark was easy!

CheeseAndMushroomToastie · 27/05/2013 17:56

Just come on to say I'm having a rubbish day, possibly my fault for trying to potty train my almost 3 year old whilst having some guests round whilst the house is a tip and just feeling frazzled overall. Miss the little things like being able to pop to the supermarket with just one child, and DH works long hours so might as well be a single parent. I know I need to relax and not stress about housework etc but that's my nature! Also going to quit potty training for a while, I smell poo everywhere I go now, even though its probably in my head, - easier to change the nappies than clean up the mess and wanting to cry.

I feel a bit better, thanks for listening.

Trishstar · 27/05/2013 18:20

Sorry to hear that Cheese xx just take one day at a time and housework can wait

BonaDea · 27/05/2013 18:27

Tattoo- it is very hard to wake a sleeping baby, never mind two! We've been doing it the last few days as we decided that DS was definitely sleeping too much during the day and that was negatively impacting his night time sleep.

I actually found it very stressful. It seems so cruel to wake a baby or keep him up when he is clearly tired or sleepy. Also difficult - we were singing in his face, clapping, jiggling him about etc. pretty grim!

But, it seems to be getting better already. He took his 'proper' naps today and was wakeful in between.

Dysgu · 27/05/2013 19:59

Just caught up with what everyone has been up to and all the challenges everyone is coping with.

Evan seems to have a slight tummy bug - he has been really miserable since 4am this morning and we have had lots of poo which seems to be bothering him too. Normally he goes every other day. He is clingy and wants to be held all the time - I don't think he has been put down all day apart from when we went out so he was in his car seat.

He feeds every 3 hours but still struggles to take more than 3-4oz at a time before being exhausted. Today he has hardly been awake - but has been waking constantly to cry and then be settled back to sleep again!

It is interesting to read what all your babies are playing with. Evan doesn't seem to be very interested in very much yet - he is 10 weeks old now (4 weeks corrected) so still like a new born in many ways. He does smile a lot though and loves playing peekaboo when I pull material over his face! He has no interest in his feet and wrist toys and will often lie happily enough on his baby gym but doesn't seem interested in the toys yet. We have put the baby bar on his car seat - again, he will watch us play with them but that is about as far as it goes.

As for clothes, he is looking pretty good in his 0-3 clothes now so i have bundled up his tiny baby stuff and newborn stuff. I have put some outfits in his memory box and will probably freecycle the rest at some stage.

And as for relationships - Evan is our 3rd child and the first few months are always trying! We do tend to get on better when we find time to DTD but that might have more to do with feeling impressed that we finally hav 3 children asleep at the same time...

And it is half term and DP goes back tomorrow after being off for the bank holiday so I have all three of them to myself...

enjay0811 · 27/05/2013 20:04

Oh wishful I could of wrote that post about me and dh! I know he has to get up for work but barely opens an eye during a night feed and still thinks he's more tired! Seem to have a growing resentment for him atm and most things he does piss me off. The lack of intimacy doesn't help but sure we'll be fine or I'll lose it with him soon!

LikeCandy · 27/05/2013 20:51

wishful and enjay thank goodness for your posts - I've been feeling exactly the same about DH for weeks!
I've tried to write this post a few times and have kept deleting it - it just sounds like I'm a whining, resentful cow!

Thanks to those who posted about my sickly situation (sorry not to name check, on phone and can't flick back a page!) BabyCandy has had another day where she brings up a lot of milk, she's also crying with gassy pains. I'm going to ring the HV tomorrow and see if she suggests GP or BF consultant.

enjay0811 · 27/05/2013 21:03

candy I asked hv about F being sick and she was as much use as a chocolate teapot! said to give the breast feeding consultant a ring as they would be able to give better advice, which is fine but didn't help ease the worry! F seems to have improved since and I can sort of work out when she's going to be sick or try and prevent it (keeping her upright on my knee) so haven't phoned. Have you tried infacol or anything?

Original poster

HadALittleFaithBaby · 27/05/2013 21:08

candy we've got the same issue, especially if she goes flat too soon. She's got her GP appointment tomorrow so will ask then but a quick google suggested gripe water. She's brought up more gas and seems more settled and she's only had 3 doses! May be worth a try with baby candy?

Re the relationship stuff. Makes you realise why people stress that a baby won't fix a failing marriage eh? We had a tough time last year, worked hard to improve things. At times it's felt like us at our worst again although its improving I think.

OP posts:

LikeCandy · 27/05/2013 21:23

enjay I know what the useless HV will say, as she always says 'if she's gaining weight, and looks well, it's completely normal/ fine' - doesn't stop the worry though! I'm thinking BF counsellor will be the next plan, I'm lucky to live close tos the hospital where there is a support group most morning run by an 'expert' - will aim to get there on weds.

faith my Mum has just suggested gripe water. How are you using it? Before/after feeds? Every feed? I will buy some in the morning.
I'm not a fan of infacol - too chemically and not enough published evidence to suggest it does anything other than placebo - at least gripe water is more natural and has some history behind it!!

karinmaria · 27/05/2013 22:15

Hi all, here's another with the same feelings (almost resentment?) towards DH. He works shifts so does need his sleep and is fab on days off and the times he is awake and at home but I am still green eyed at his ability to sleep. And does it make me a bad person to feel a bit resentful that he has a break when he's at work,,.?

We still haven't DTD - definitely looking forward to getting that back. Not feeling great about myself though (previous eating disorder threatening to raise its head due to post baby body and loads of spots) and a tender episiotomy scar not helping though.

Baby seems to be ok though, except for a slightly concerning lack of poo! It's been 48 hours and bub is uncomfy.

Will be amongst those trying gripe water over the next few days. Will report back!

birdbrain21 · 27/05/2013 22:42

Baby bird does quite a lot of sick but has been gaining weight nicely so not worried about it. Problem is that is doesn't bother her when she throws up so does it quietly (unlike nappies and needing to burp) so quite often I put her down to play/sleep and come back to find she has sick all over her and she normally rolls in it so gets it in her hair also!!!!

Well we just had first evening where we put her to bed upstairs instead of letting her sleep down here till we go to bed, I fed her at 8 gave her a bath and DH got her to go down by 9. I've been up and down a few times to stick the dummy back in but apart from that seems to have worked nicely, but she didn't really sleep much today just dozed on and off so maybe she was more tired? Still I hope we can get her to settle every night, I know what you ladies mean about finding it a stress on relationships with OH. I love DH and he really is a great help but I have noticed I get annoyed at him more easily then I used to...

birdbrain21 · 27/05/2013 22:44

Got my 6 week check up tomorrow (can't believe it, I remember being discharged from hospital and thinking 6 week check up would be in ages!) what actually happens? Can anyone give me a rough idea of how long it takes as we're planning on going for supper with my Dad so want to know what time I'll be finished

Trishstar · 27/05/2013 22:49

My 6 week check up tool normal appt time of 10 mins'

Just asked me things like how I was feeling, did I have support, how my scar was, had we dtd yet, what contraception would I like?!

I expected more tbh!!

Trishstar · 27/05/2013 22:49

Oh and how my boobs were!!!

enjay0811 · 27/05/2013 23:01

Just wanted to let those know who mentioned gripe water - I bought some and asked the midwife bout it before being discharged and she reckons it's not recommended for babies under 3 mths now. Something to do with it not working because it no longer contains alcohol?!

usernamegoeshere · 27/05/2013 23:09

So glad it's not just me and OH suffering relationship wise! And thank you all for the support on my feeding problems.

ruddy my situation is same as yours, asthma and allergies all through OHs family so I am extra worried about stopping Bf.

Read up some on kellymom, I felt that my supply might be low and she wasn't getting enough, however reading up I seem to match more signs of a fast let down. Working through the suggestions to help it.

Just realised 6 week check next week, it has gone so fast!

karinmaria · 27/05/2013 23:40

Thanks enjay - will check before I use it

bunnygirl80 · 28/05/2013 00:21

Dd slept 12 hours staight through last night

Jo1984uk · 28/05/2013 01:42

Up doing first feed of the night..

Wow, bunny that's amazing I thought I was lucky as lo just slept for over 4 hours straight!!

At my 6 week check they just asked how I was feeling, took blood pressure, checked episiotomy scar and that's about it. She did take the time to ask about how the birth went which I was grateful for.. As it didn't go quite to plan I still like talking about it. Not quite sure why!!

Dysgu, good luck with the 3 liittle ones over half term.. I would love to have 3 one day :-) will see how it goes with this lo first though

Trishstar · 28/05/2013 02:28

H went just over 6 hours from his feed at 7.40pm last night.

Original poster

HadALittleFaithBaby · 28/05/2013 02:55

Hi all.

My 6 week check up was as described by others. She's given me a hospital anxiety and depression score to complete too and got me to book an appointment in 2 weeks because I was quite tesrful.

With the gripe water it says up to 6 times a day so so far she's had it before two feeds (feeding now) and one lot in her bottle. She was so much more settled before bed. She tends to feed for a while in the evening but usually it's constant and she's frantic when off the boob, last night she rested between boobs and snuggled on me. Wasn't sick either. I did check the NHS guidelines which says its ok after 1 month see here and to get advice if giving it before 1 month....

OP posts:

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